Liquid Redemption (Liquid Regret Book 4)

by MJ Carnal

  “I don’t believe in love, remember?” She gives me one last look before she shuts the door to the suite. For just a moment, she seems almost human.

  It didn’t take long to find a willing participant for last night’s sex Olympics. Once everyone cleared out of my room, I headed down to the lobby and there she was. When she saw me, her eyes lit up. She said her name was Morgan but it really didn’t matter to me.

  I took her back upstairs and worshipped her for hours. It was one of the nights I didn’t allow myself to get off. As soon as we were locked inside my room, I knew it was a mistake. Something didn’t sit right with me and although my body was willing, my mind wasn’t in it. I turned on the charm and made sure she had the time of her life. She’ll have stories to tell all her friends. I just couldn’t get into it enough to care. I escorted her back downstairs around six, before most of the world was awake.

  The downside to all this is that I didn’t sleep much. Today, we head to Boise. It’s a long drive and I’ll have plenty of time to sleep on the bus. I settle into one of the bunks and pull the curtain closed.

  “Where is he?”

  Katrina’s voice is loud and angry. I’m too tired to care. I pull the pillow over my head and shut my eyes. Joshua can handle it.

  The curtain is ripped open and she yanks the pillow off my face. Her eyes shoot daggers at me and I’m sure my bloodshot ones mirror hers back.

  “What the fuck, King?”

  “All night? Really? I told you I’d keep your conquests out of the story but you don’t have to be an asshole about it. Are you torturing me on purpose?” She’s pissed.

  I sit up, sighing and frustrated. “Ok, I’ll bite. How did I personally offend you already today?”

  Max starts laughing. “You must have drawn the short straw. Let me guess. You were next door to Casanova last night?”

  My eyes widen. I don’t know why it bothers me that she was next door, but it does. A wave of guilt crashes over me. “Were you really next door?”

  “Yes. I was really next door. I slept a total of thirty-seven minutes. For as impressive as you seem to be, I’m not amused. I’m sleep deprived and bitchy.”

  “Half of that isn’t because I kept you up. You were a bitch before.” I regret my words instantly.

  “Thanks.” She throws her bag into one of the chairs.

  “King,” I reach for her arm but she pulls away. “Katrina.”

  She looks back at me and my heart squeezes. “Get some rest. I’d hate to be the cause of you losing sleep. I’d hate to be a bitch.”

  I pull the curtain closed but I can’t sleep. The woman makes me so frustrated and I don’t owe her any kind of explanation. I’m not going to stop living my life because she’s next door. I’m certainly not going to feel bad for telling her she’s a bitch. She is. That’s a fact. This shouldn’t come as a surprise to her. She’s been on my case since the first day she met me.

  I shove my headphones into my ears and blast my music. I’m done with her. She wants a story, she can interview one of the other guys. Why the fuck am I so angry?

  Chapter 8

  “Hold on. Take this piece and thread it through there.” Chance drapes himself shamelessly across a blond sitting in his dressing room. I roll my eyes. “Grab this end and twist.”

  Her eyes are focused on his. “Like this?”

  He laughs. “No. Don’t pull it so hard or you’ll snap the string.”

  “This is hopeless,” she looks at him wide eyed.

  “Am I interrupting?” Chance jumps away from her when he hears my voice.

  “Oh, it’s just you.” He pushes off the couch. “This is Karen. Karen, Katrina.”

  Her smile lights up her whole face. She’s way too good for him. “It’s nice to meet you, Katrina. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

  “I wanted you to be the first to see this.” I don’t acknowledge his latest conquest. I’m living up to the bitch he thinks I am. I hand Chance the newspaper that will hit newsstands in just a few hours.

  He takes the paper from my hand and reads it slowly. I bite my lip. Why am I nervous? His jaw relaxes as he reads the story of Liquid Regret’s bass guitarist who saved Harley’s life and singlehandedly saved the group in the process.

  When he’s finished, he looks at me with a look on his face I’ve never seen before. “I’m not sure what to say.”

  “Wow,” Karen giggles from the couch. “I’ve never seen you speechless. What is it?”

  He smiles at her and hands her the article I stayed up all night writing. After hitting a brick wall interviewing Chance, I spent a few hours getting Harley’s take on that fateful day in the cemetery. Joshua filled in a few blanks and a quick phone call to Rachel provided me with the last piece of the puzzle. When it was finished, it brought tears to my eyes. It’s the most powerful piece I’ve ever written. Part of me had an intense desire to run to him and make him talk to me. I had an overwhelming urge to know everything I could about him.

  Looking at him now, I really see him. He’s gorgeous and I understand the appeal. His bright eyes shine with the promise of pleasure. His lips are perfect and beg to be kissed. His strong jaw and chiseled body make my breathing change. No matter how much I think I hate him, something in me shifts.

  “This is amazing. I didn’t know all of this. Why haven’t you told me this?” Karen’s eyes are full of tears as she talks to Chance.

  “Kind of what the article is for.” I brush the front of my shirt, willing the wrinkles to go away. “Their manager hired me to tell the true stories instead of what other reporters are telling. I’m sure a girl like you isn’t interested in all the fluff pieces. I’d bet you’re much more interested in what ole’ Chance here has to offer you. So, I will leave you to it.”

  Karen stands. “I’m very aware of what Joshua hired you for. I had a big part in the decision making to put you on the tour bus.”

  “She’s upset with me. She has a hard time seeing past that.” Chance is making excuses for me and I realize I’m doing it again. He hugs her and I want to scream. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Make sure you take one of the guards with you when you leave.”

  She stares at me for a minute before leaving the dressing room. If I see her again, I will apologize.

  “What the fuck is your problem? Being an asshole to me is one thing. But taking it out on anyone associated with me? That’s a whole new level of fucked up. I’m done with this. You want to keep interviewing us, this ends right now.” Chance is fuming.

  When I keep silent, he grabs the paper off the couch. “You write this and it’s beautiful. It makes me sound like a hero. It’s completely opposite of how you actually see me. Why? What is it about me that pisses you off so much that you attack Max’s sister for just being in my presence?”

  He grabs my arm and I try to pull away. “Let go of me.”

  “No. Not until you answer me.”

  He’s just inches from me. His bright green eyes bore into me. His grip on my arm burns my skin. He’s too close and it’s getting hard to breathe. His face is red with anger and his breathing is shallow.

  “Answer me!” he yells. His voice is demanding.

  His grip tightens on my arm and he pulls me closer. I’m overcome with a mixture of fear and desire. The man in front of me is the definition of gorgeous and I lose my mind.

  My lips crash against his and he pulls away instantly. I’m breathless as I stare into his wide eyes. He studies my face and shakes his head trying to make sense of what just happened.

  “What the hell was that?” He lets go of my arm and takes a step back.

  I’m snapped back to reality and cover my mouth with my hand. “Oh my God. I’m so sorry. I have no idea why I just did that.”

  The room is silent as we stare at each other. I need to get out of here.

  “I have to go.”

  I stand on the roof of one of the fanciest hotels on the Vegas strip. The nightclub is packed with fans trying to get close to any of the me
mbers of the band. We have two nights off before their next show and we decided to head to Vegas early. It’s the perfect place to spend a few down days.

  I look out at the lights of the strip and sip on my glass of champagne. It’s been two days since my gigantic lapse in judgment. Chance doesn’t seem phased at all but I’m all screwed up in my head. The minute my lips touched his, everything changed for me. I’m still angry but now it’s because he had no response. He pushed me away. The man whore, screw anything that moves member of the band pushed me away. How far have I fallen?

  The minute it happened, I called Ray. I needed her advice. She was too interested in whether or not it was going to happen again. I wanted to yell at her but I know I would have been the same way. The only other person in my life is Lorenzo and he talked me down from the ledge. Hearing his voice helped put everything in perspective. It doesn’t hurt that he’s gorgeous and most of our time together is spent naked. Hearing I was desirable was all I needed.

  I take a deep breath and finish the last sip of my champagne. I make my way through the crowd to the elevator. The bouncer presses the button for me and I wait in silence. When the doors open, I duck inside and hit the button to my floor about a hundred times.

  “Hold the elevator.” I hear his deep voice and I shiver. This can’t be happening.

  He steps inside, his bodyguard hot on his heels. When he sees me, he grins. “Princess.”

  Chapter 9

  I race for the elevator. It’s been a long night and I’m done with the groping and selfies. I’ve loved having a day off and Vegas is my favorite place on Earth. Truth be told though, I would rather do a show every night and get home earlier. The guys all have their women and they fly in to spend these days off together. For me, these are the nights I don’t care about the women. Instead of sleeping the whole break, I decided it was better to get out, meet some fans and kick back with a few drinks.

  As the elevator doors start to close, I reach for them and yell to hold the elevator. My bodyguard is right behind me, holding back the ones who haven’t gotten the hint that I’m not interested. These guards are really not paid enough. They have to put up with quite a bit of bullshit.

  I step into the elevator and Katrina rolls her eyes when I call her princess. She’s been scarce since the night in my dressing room. I didn’t handle that well. I was just so shocked and I shoved her away. The only problem with that is I haven’t been able to get those few seconds out of my head. She’s not a groupie. Shit, she hates me. But her lips felt right and she’s avoided me ever since.

  “How’s the hiding going?”

  “Excuse me?” She gives me the eat shit look I’m so accustomed to.

  “You’ve been hiding from me. No reason to deny it. Sadly, I’ve been seeking.” Her head snaps in my direction and I shrug. “Apparently I suck at it because I haven’t been able to find you.”

  She’s unusually quiet. I don’t want her to feel awkward. It was bad enough when she was speaking to me. Ignoring me will be so much worse.

  “Listen, I didn’t handle that day very well.”

  She shakes her head and puts her hand up to stop me. “I really don’t want to talk about it.”

  I take a step forward and she steps back. I repeat it until she has nowhere left to go. “We need to talk about it because we have a few more weeks together on the road and I like to face shit head on. You have such a wall up and pushing you away made it worse.”

  She huffs out a breath. “Fine. I’m sorry. I don’t have any idea what I was thinking. Clearly, I wasn’t. That ranks up there as one of the dumbest things I’ve ever done. What I should have done was realized the woman on the couch was Karen and not been such a bitch. No, what I should have done was just walked out once I gave you the article. There wasn’t a reason to stay.”

  “What I should have done,” I pause. Turning to my bodyguard, I smile. “Can you turn around for a minute?”

  “What the hell are you doing?” Katrina’s eyes widen.

  “What I should have done is this.” I pull her to me and devour her mouth. My lips are hungry and she’s my prey. Her hands push against my chest but her mouth tells a completely different story. She opens for me and our tongues fight for dominance.

  The kiss is brief but it’s enough for me to know I want to do it again. She touches her lips and looks at me. Her face is too hard to read. There are only two options here. Either she’ll punch me or she’ll come find me to do that again. I step back into my corner and my bodyguard chuckles.

  When the elevator doors open, she freezes.

  “Ciao Bella. Did you miss me?”

  “Lorenzo,” she jumps into his arms and wraps her legs around his waist. “What are you doing here?”

  “Holy shit. Lorenzo DeGatti.” It doesn’t happen often but even I get star struck. “Nice to meet you, man. I’m Chance.”

  Katrina laughs at me. “Chance, Enzo. Enzo, this is one of the guys I’m writing about.”

  “Pleasure, Chance. I missed my woman so I figured I would fly out to see her for the weekend. I hope I’m not interrupting anything.” He looks between me and Katrina.

  She shakes her head and giggles. “Of course not. I’m so happy to see you.”

  To say I’m shocked is an understatement. I just had the most intense kiss of my life with this woman thirty seconds ago and now she’s wrapped around the hottest Formula One driver on the planet. I’m not sure if I’m pissed or jealous. I’m Lennon Chancellor, damnit. I compete with no one.

  He pats her ass and growls at her. “Room. Now.”

  As the door closes with me inside and them on the outside, my bodyguard starts to laugh. “Ain’t that some shit, kid. What are the odds?”

  I shove another piece of bacon into my mouth while Harley, Joshua and Max stare at me. “It was Lorenzo Mother Fucking DeGatti. I shit you not. He was just standing there looking like he just stepped off the pages of GQ or some shit. He called her his woman and practically mauled her in the hallway.”

  Harley’s laugh echoes through the whole room. “I bet you about blew your load when you saw him. Shit, I wish I’d been on that elevator just to see your face.”

  Joshua chokes on his juice. “What am I missing? Who is Lorenzo whoever?”

  Max shakes his head. “Oh, here we go. Chance has had a crush on him for years.”

  I punch his arm. “He’s a Formula One driver. His dad owns the DeGatti Tire empire. I won’t confirm or deny a crush on him. But I think you’re all missing the point. He was here to see Katrina. Remember her? The pain in the ass on tour with us?”

  “Isn’t that perfect? You can get an intro. Maybe bond. Ask him to marry you.” This time, Max dodges my fist.

  “I had my tongue down her throat ten seconds before the elevator doors opened.” That got their attention. Even Joshua stops what he’s doing and stares at me.

  “Oh man, I need to get to the hospital. Something is wrong with my hearing. I swear I thought you said your tongue was down her throat.” Harley sticks his finger in his ear and wiggles it around.

  “No.” Joshua’s voice is stern. “You fuck her, she fucks us. You understand me?”

  “I didn’t fuck her. I kissed her.”

  “For you, that’s the same thing. You stop this now. She’s off limits. The last thing we need is your one-night stand hurting her and her retaliating in the press.” Joshua put his dishes back on the room service tray. “This can’t happen, Chance. There’s no scenario where this can happen.”

  “I have to agree.” Harley puts his hand on my shoulder. “She’s hot, I see the appeal. But she hates you, man. Don’t make this worse.”

  I poke at my eggs before putting my fork down. They’re right. What the hell was I thinking? I can’t pursue her. I can’t bed her just to have a warm body next to me. Not her.

  “But if you wanted to fuck Lorenzo, he’s not off limits. Imagine that plot twist in the press.” Joshua laughs as he steps out of the room.

  “Did
Seymour just have jokes?”

  Chapter 10

  “I obviously walked into something.” Enzo puts his boxers back on and smiles at me. “Want to clue me in?”

  He’s gorgeous. I hit the jackpot with him. “It was nothing. He just wanted to talk about the other day when he pushed me away.”

  He leans down and kisses me. “If it becomes more, make sure you tell me. I’ve honored this friends with benefits pact and been monogamous and it’s been great, Kat. But when it’s done, it’s done. No fault, no explanation.”

  “Of course.” I watch him as he digs through his suitcase. I wish I could love him. It would be so easy with him. We’re so alike and face the world with the same chip on our shoulder. Mine stems from my incredibly shitty childhood and his from the constant competition to live up to his brother’s legacy but we both fight for everything that’s worth it. I’m lost in thought.

  Lorenzo is staring at me. “You could do worse.”

  “What?” I giggle when he shakes his head.

  “Chance. You could do worse. I don’t care what he wanted to talk to you about. The dude had a look on his face that wasn’t one from just talking.”

  “It’s because you were standing there. He’s obviously a fan. I thought he was going to shove me off of you and take my place.” I laugh remembering the introduction.

  “He might have shoved you off me but it wasn’t to take your place. That’s a man on a mission. And your lips were pretty swollen from the talking.” He winks and pulls a shirt on over his head. “I’m going to go get us some coffee. Don’t go far. Round three starts in about ten minutes.”

  I watch him leave the room. I don’t want to lose what we have but when the season starts, I know he’ll be gone for months. It’s not fair to make him give up potential women just because I’m selfish and enjoy the sex a little too much. He’s incredible and he’s the best male friend I’ve ever had.

  That isn’t true. I close my eyes and remember the scared, little boy I knew when I was twelve. He was my everything and even though it was only a couple weeks, he was my lifeline. He was the definition of what a man should be. He kept me warm when I was cold, he stood up for me when things weren’t going my way, he kept me safe when I was scared. Then he was gone and my life was empty again. I wish I knew who he was and where he is. I was just a kid but I knew I was supposed to meet him. He’s the reason I can’t get close to most people. He’s the reason I will never fall in love. He was gone in the blink of an eye and never came back for me.