Into Each Life

by Shelia E. Bell

  “Yeah, she’s some study partner alright. But I’m just saying, I can’t believe he lied like that.” Just then, Teary’s other line beeped. “Hold on a minute, Debra. Let me see who this is.” She clicked over. “Hello.”

  “Hey, what’s up?” the caller asked.

  “Hold on. Let me get off the other line.” Teary clicked back over to Debra. “This is him on the other end. I’ll call you back later and tell you what lie he tells me.”

  “Okay, girl, bye,” Debra said, hanging up.

  “What’s up?” he asked in a rather irritated voice after Teary clicked back over. “You called me?”

  “Yeah, I sure did. I thought you had made it home from your so-called audition, but your momma said you were over to a friend’s house studying. She didn’t know anything about an audition. What’s up with that, Langston? Why you been lying to me?”

  He exploded. “What are you doing checking up on me anyway? I don’t need you trying to keep a leash on me.”

  “I’m not trying to keep a leash on you. I just want to know why you lied,” she shot back.

  “Let me tell you something, I don’t like this bull crap. I didn’t know you were going to be the possessive type. I thought what we shared was supposed to be special. But I see now, that you really don’t trust me.” She couldn’t respond because he didn’t give her a chance. “I tell you what Teary; it’s over. I don’t need some female who doesn’t trust me. I’m done.”

  “Langston, what are you saying? I do trust you. And what are you talking about, it’s over. Don’t be talking like that,” she pleaded tearfully. She didn’t bother to tell him what Debra had seen.

  “If I let you get away with this crap this time, all you’re going to do is something else crazy. Look, I think it’s time we go our separate ways. I enjoyed what we had while we had it. But now, hey, I’m outta here. Plus, I’m young, you’re young and we don’t need to be in a serious relationship anyway. I’ll holler back at you.” And at that, he slammed down the receiver.

  What am I going to do? I can’t confide in Sara, Teary thought as she sat there in tears. All she’ll do is lecture me or she might even tell Momma and Daddy. I can’t tell Debra any more than what I already have. God forbid that. She means well, but she’s sure to tell Chelsia, and Chelsia will tell somebody else, and that somebody would tell somebody else, and before long, everybody in the school will know about me and Langston. Teary was hurt, confused and scared.

  She heard her mother’s voice calling her. “Teary, time for dinner.”

  Teary yelled back down at her mother. “I’m not hungry. I have some homework to finish up,” she lied.

  She climbed up into her full size bed, pulled her teddy bears close to her and let her tears fall freely. Holding on to her favorite stuffed animal, she started her prayer. God, I’m sorry. I really messed up big time. I’ve been so stupid. Please forgive me.” She cried until her eyes were swollen and sleep took over.

  chapter 7

  That’s What Friends Are For

  The early morning sun kissed the peach curtains, casting a stream of light on Teary’s swollen face. She felt the soothing heat against her skin and lazily opened one eye and then the other. She slowly climbed out of bed, but stumbled backwards when she saw the person staring at her in the mirror. Was this her?

  Her face was puffy, her eyes were tight, and her hair was tangled and all over her head. At first she didn’t remember the past day’s events, but as her mind fully awoke from her night’s sleep, the dreadful memories swooshed back to their rightful place. She slowly pulled the curtains back and peered across the street at Prodigal’s house to see if his porch light had been turned off. If it was, then she knew that someone was up. The light was out so she dialed his number. The phone rang three times before he answered.

  “Boy, am I glad you answered. You up yet?” Teary sighed into the phone.

  “Yeah, what’s up?” He knew her like a book. Something was wrong. He heard it in her voice. It had to be that no good punk, Langston.

  The only person Teary felt she could trust was Prodigal. No matter how bad things were, he wouldn’t let her down. “I need to talk to you. Can you meet me in about half an hour at Willow Lake?”

  “Yea, but I can meet you sooner than that if you want me to. Fantasia and Hope are still asleep, and Momma called and said she has to pull a double.”

  She responded slowly. “Give me about ten minutes then and I’ll meet you outside. But don’t come over here and knock on the door, I don’t want to wake up anybody. You know how they like to sleep in late on Saturday. I’m just going to sneak out and be back before anyone knows I’ve been gone.”

  When he laid eyes on her, Prodigal was livid. “Look at you. What did that creep do to you? I swear, I’m going to…” Prodigal ranted.

  “Stop it, Prodigal. You’re not going to do anything. I just need you to listen. Now, come on. Let’s go before somebody sees us.” They got their bikes and rode in silence the three and a half blocks to Willow Lake. When they got their, they both headed for their favorite bench and sat down, still neither of them saying anything. She rested her head on his shoulder and listened to the sound of the hungry ducks and pigeons beginning to surround them.

  Prodigal pulled a bag of stale bread crumbs from his pocket and began throwing them out to the ducks and pigeons. He would wait until she was ready to tell him what was going on. Things were serious, but he had already decided that no matter what had happened, he was going to stand by her. He loved her, and he couldn’t stand the thought of any one hurting or misusing her. After a few minutes, she broke the silence.

  “I can’t believe he did me like this,” she cried to her best friend. “I just can’t believe it. And you know what I did with him? I went all the way with him, Prodigal. I gave him all of me. And before you pass judgment on me, before you tell me you hate me, just listen.”

  Disappointment and a look of utter disbelief washed over Prodigal’s face. His chest tightened and his fists began to clench, but he remained quiet. He looked like someone had stabbed him smack dab in the center of his heart. He was hesitant to say anything for fear of completely going off on her for being so vulnerable when it came to Langston.

  “Don’t be angry with me. Don’t hate me, and don’t hate Langston. It’s as much my fault as it is his,” she pleaded. “I love him, Prodigal, and I thought he loved me, too.”

  “Sshh, it’s going to be alright,” he said, brushing her hair from her face with his hands.

  “Oh my God, suppose I’m pregnant; suppose he has an STD and passed it on to me. Prodigal, why didn’t I think about all of this before I had sex with him? How could I mess up my life like this? How?”

  “Teary, stop it. Don’t be so hard on yourself. What’s done is done. Come here.” He held her closer to him, shielding her in the warmth of his arms.

  She spoke, her tears wetting his jersey. “That’s not all, Prodigal.”

  “What else happened?” he asked, not sure he could take much more.

  She lifted her head back so she could see his face. I might as well tell him everything, she decided. “Debra saw him with another girl the other day. When I called and tried to talk to him, he just went off. He said he didn’t want to have anything else to do with m. Then he just hung up the phone in my face. I can’t believe he did me like this.”

  A fresh stream of tears washed her face. Prodigal cradled her in his arms and rocked her slowly back and forth like a baby. If she was his girl, he would never make her cry.

  “Shhh. I’m here. Please don’t cry,” he said as he planted a kiss on her forehead and then kissed the salty tears running down her cheeks.

  She felt safe in his arms. She wished Langston could have been more compassionate and caring like Prodigal. She thought of all the times Prodigal had stuck by her whether she was right or wrong. She nestled closer underneath the curve of his arm and listened as the beat of his heart meshed with hers.

  Prodigal’s wor
ds invaded the moment between them. “You know I didn’t like him for you in the first place. He just came on too strong, way too strong.” He eased back but still embraced her and looked into her eyes. “If he really cared for you, he wouldn’t have pressured you to go all the way. Now, he’s running up behind someone else, and she just doesn’t know it yet, but more than likely she’s in for the same thing. But you know what? Forget that. You can’t worry about him anymore. You have to let it go.”

  “But I’m so ashamed. I feel stupid, dirty and used.”

  “Look, you’ll be fine.” He cupped her chin in the palm of his hands, gently lifting her face up. “I know I may not go to church that often, but it doesn’t mean that I don’t believe in the man up there.” He glanced upwards and pointed one finger toward the sky. “My daddy used to always say, there's nothing too hard for God; he used to say that all the time. And he also used to teach us that God will forgive us when we mess up.”

  Her tears began to subside as she listened. “I know you think that what you did is unforgivable, but believe me, that isn’t true. Langston isn’t worth getting depressed about. One day you’ll find someone who’s really for you. Okay?” He clung to her, clutching her tightly and wishing that he could be that someone.

  “Promise me we’ll always be friends; promise me that, Prodigal,” Teary pleaded.

  “I promise.”

  A few days after their break up, Teary saw Langston and the new girl standing together at the school bus stop. When he spotted Teary, he leaned in closer to the girl and whispered in her ear. She released a silly giggle and wiggled her butt like she had to pee or something. When the girl saw Teary, she gave her an evil, crooked smile and eased her arm around Langston’s waist.

  There were times Teary sat in the bay window in her room to think about what she should have done differently. In the recesses of her mind, she heard her father’s raised voice grilling her and Sara about being good Christian girls.

  “Listen here, the two of you,” her father would say, especially after Sunday service, “Save yourselves for your husbands. Don’t let any smooth talking, mannish punk get you to give up the most precious gift you can give to your husband — your virginity. I know what I’m talking ‘bout. Remember, I was once a boy myself. When I was a youngster, I tried to run game on girls myself. I even tried with your momma.”

  Sara and Teary covered their mouths trying to hold back their snickering.

  “But your momma didn’t go for my fast talk. Every time I tried to go too far, she’d start quoting Bible scriptures. Talking about, the Bible says that we should abstain from fornication. I said, what you say girl? Abstain from fornication? Baby, I just want to make out with you, that’s all. Shucks. I didn’t even know what she was talking about then. Forni... what I asked her? This here is what she said…” Mr. Fullalove raised his voice to a high pitch, pretending like he was their mother. “Boy, you know what I’m talking about. Sex is a sin if you do it and you’re not married..”

  He couldn’t hold back his laughter any longer. “He looked over at his wife and asked, “Honey, what was that Bible verse you used to quote whenever I got fresh with you? I know you still know it, too.”

  “I most certainly do.” Mrs. Fullalove smiled at her husband’s poor attempt at imitating her. “It’s in the fourth chapter of first Thessalonians, around the third or fourth verse. It says, “For this is the will of God, even your sanctification that you should abstain from fornication. Whenever I repeated that verse to your father, he couldn’t help but take his mannish butt on somewhere else and out of my face.” She moved closer to her husband, grabbed hold of him and wrapped herself underneath the curve of his massive arm.

  “Now, you hear what she just said?” Mr. Fullalove asked his daughters. “I want the both of you to be just like your momma. You hear? Don’t be hardheaded and disobedient. The Bible will tell you the same thing that I’m telling you. Your days will surely be cut off if you disobey your parents. I’m telling you what the Lord says. Do you hear me, Teary? Do you hear what I’m saying, Sara?”

  “Yes, Daddy,” they would always say in unison.

  “And another thing. If you do what we say and keep your legs closed, you won’t have any problems.”

  Teary didn’t know if Sara had followed their father’s teachings or not. She only knew that she hadn’t. So many times she wanted to believe that Langston was the one for her, but she had been so wrong.

  ♦

  “Teary,” Sara yelled from downstairs.

  “What is it?” Teary answered.

  “Prodigal is here.”

  “Here I come.” Teary pulled her hair back in a ponytail, stepped in her slides and went to see what was up with him.

  “What’s up?” Teary asked as she made her way down the stairs.

  “What were you doing up there?” Prodigal asked her.

  “Nothing, really. What are you getting ready to do?”

  “I’m going to see Faith later on, but right now I wanted to see if you wanted to walk to the corner store with me.” Prodigal looked for any excuse to be with Teary. He liked Faith, he liked her a lot, but no girl would ever fill the space Teary had in his heart.

  “You must be going to get a grape soda?”

  “Now what would make you think that?” he chuckled.

  “Boy, you know that I know you like the back of my hand. A grape soda is the only reason your butt will walk to the store.”

  “Okay, so you’re right. Now, are you going with me or not?”

  “Yea, I’ll go with you. Let me go get some change.” She went upstairs to her room, grabbed her change purse and hurried back downstairs.

  “Come on. Let’s go,” she told him, walking past him to the door. They took their time walking to the store.

  “Are you feeling better?” Prodigal asked her.

  “A little bit. But it’s still just hard running into Langston at school or on the street, you know.”

  “It’ll get easier. And you know what the old folks say – time heals all wounds.”

  “I sure hope so,” she signed. “Oh, I forgot to tell you that I got my period so I don’t have to worry about being pregnant.”

  “Ugh, spare me the details please.”

  “Sorry, but you’re the one who told me to keep you posted,” she grinned. “So you said that you were going over to Faith’s later. What do you two have planned?”

  “We’ll probably watch a video or something. Do you want to go over there with me?”

  “Boy, please. You know that wouldn’t be right. That girl does not want me sitting between the two of y’all, messing up your flow.”

  “What flow? We’re just going to watch a movie. She won’t mind if you come. She’s cool and you know it. She understands that you and I are tight.”

  “I hope you didn’t tell her what happened, Prodigal,” Teary stopped walking and squinted her eyes at him.

  “Now you know me better than that. I would never betray your trust in me.”

  “I know. I guess I’m just still a little paranoid about things.”

  “Sure. I understand.”

  “But getting back to you and Faith. She’s cool but she wants to spend time with you, Prodigal, not me and you. Don’t you get it?”

  “I just want to make sure you’re going to be alright, that’s all.”

  “Thanks. I appreciate that. I really do. But you go and hang out with your girl. I’ll be okay. Me, Debra and Chelsia might go to a movie tonight anyway.”

  Once they arrived at the store, they went in and Prodigal bought a grape soda for himself and a peach soda for Teary. The warm weather heightened their thirst so they drank the ice cold sodas on their way back home. Prodigal managed to make Teary laugh by telling her jokes along the way. He even yanked on her hair a few times like he used to do when they were kids. She took off running after him, threatening to break every bone in his body. For a moment, she forgot about everything around her. Everything and everyone, exc
ept her and Prodigal.

  When they made it to her house, they were both out of breath from their antics. Standing on the sidewalk, he told her, “Listen, if you change your mind and decide you want to go over to Faith’s house with me, then give me a call. I’m going over there house around seven.”

  “Sure, but I’m not going to change my mind. You go and have a good time. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

  “Suit yourself. I’ll see you.”

  Chapter 8

  Nothing Stays the Same

  Fantasia, Sara, and Trina marched across the stage proudly to receive their first rite of passage – a high school diploma. Fantasia delivered a valedictorian message that brought everyone in the audience to their feet. She couldn’t wait to start the summer program at Montserrat College of Arts.

  A few weeks after graduating, however, the three friends went their separate ways. Trina took off for New York to live with her uncle and his wife before starting college in the fall. But Sara’s life was the one that took a surprisingly different turn that no one would ever have suspected. Mr. and Mrs. Fullalove had made plans to send her to Seattle to live with her Aunt Vashti.

  Aunt Vashti didn’t say a word when she received the call from her brother, telling her that Sara was pregnant. When he asked if Sara could come to Seattle to live, she readily agreed for him to send her as soon as she graduated and had the baby. Knowing her brother, Brian, as well as she did, Vashti believed it was probably the best thing to do for Sara’s sake. If not, Sara would have to listen day in and day out to her father telling her about how disappointed he was in her. Aunt Vashti was one that didn’t want her two nieces to have to endure the wrath of their father. She even looked forward to Sara’s move to Seattle. Having a young person in the house would surely lift her lonely spirits. Her Aunt Vashti promised to help Sara get a job at the University of Seattle, where she was a Professor of English.

  No one could actually tell when Sara marched across the stage that she was already seven months pregnant. She had gained only a few pounds and was still able to wear all of her regular clothes. Her parents were devastated when they first found out. They never even knew she was remotely interested in any boy, and to turn up pregnant was shocking. They felt angry and betrayed. Even Trina acted indifferently toward her when the news got around the school that Sara was pregnant. Fantasia was the only friend who supported her.