Relative Happiness

by Lesley Crewe

  “She isn’t like anyone.”

  Since Gabby worked for an airline, she met most of her high flyers catering to businessmen in first class. She was gone most of the time. The family never knew her schedule. She flew all over the world and could have lived anywhere. She shared an apartment in Toronto with three co-workers because it was convenient for international flights. When she flew into Sydney, she stayed with her parents or Karen, a pal from high school.

  Because everyone said Gabby should have gone to Hollywood, Lexie and her sisters basked in second-hand glory. Lexie got a kick out of people when they’d do a double take as she walked by. The woman herself never noticed. But on Lexie’s crabbier days, it ticked her off that people held doors open for her sister but not for her.

  Their worst moment together was when they walked down the street one day after school. A gang of teenage boys spotted Gabby and started to drool. One of them shouted, “Look, its Beauty and the Beast.” Lexie’s cheeks went blood red. She was so humiliated. As they walked by, Gabby put her arm around her. She tilted her head and whispered, “I hate it when boys call me the Beast.”

  Lexie presented Adrian with a big piece of cake after supper. He looked up and smiled.

  “You spoil me.”

  She sat down with a piece for herself. “That’s okay. I like to spoil people.” She took a bite. It was good.

  “You do too much for everyone. Why don’t you save some kindness for yourself?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, you never give yourself credit for anything. You give and never take. Most people are selfish, Lexie.”

  “I like to do things for people I…like.”

  He stabbed his cake with a fork. “I don’t deserve someone like you. I’ve always been selfish.”

  “Adrian, you’re so kind. Why do you say you’re selfish?”

  He put his fork down. “I think of myself first.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with that.”

  “You don’t.” His hand went through his hair. She loved that. She wanted to reach out and do it too.

  “Sure I do. You said you wanted mashed potatoes last night. I was too lazy and threw on French fries.”

  “Oh, Lexie, that’s not what I mean.”

  “Well, what then?”

  “You took in a stranger you didn’t know. You treat me better than I deserve and yet you expect nothing in return.”

  She held up her finger and pointed at the ceiling. “As Mark Twain once said, ‘Always do right. This will gratify some people, and astonish the rest.”

  He looked miserable. She lowered her arm and said gently, “You’re my friend, Adrian. How else should I treat you?”

  “I’m so glad you’re my friend, Lexie.” He reached across the table and grabbed her hand. “Always remember that. I love you for what you’ve done for me. You opened your heart and let me in. I never deserved it.”

  It was hard to focus on anything except the way his skin felt against hers. “Of course you did.”

  “I’ll never forget this. Never. You are the one memory I’ll cherish forever.”

  She cleared her throat and took her hand away. “Adrian, just have your cake. And eat it too.”

  A week went by. Lexie was preoccupied. Everyone said so at the library.

  “What’s wrong with that one?” she heard Marlene gripe. Marlene was a big mouth. She cracked gum all day and passed judgement on everyone she came across. Lexie couldn’t begin to imagine how she ever got her job. Her vocabulary was atrocious and her people skills were even worse. Lexie’s best guess was that she was related to the head librarian. She just never had the guts to ask.

  But Lexie sure didn’t need her shit today. She ignored Marlene for as long as possible, but she kept it up.

  “You’ve got a face like a poker. What’s your problem? Can’t get a man?”

  “Fuck off.”

  The two little boys who sat at a table nearby dissolved into snorts. The head librarian resorted to her famous “SHHHHHHH,” but it was a lost cause. She’d made their day.

  Lexie left work early, pleading a migraine. She wanted to make Adrian his favourite supper. He loved beef stew and he needed something to put meat on his bones. She wondered if he was coming down with something. He swore he wasn’t, but she knew better. He didn’t even tease Sophie, even after she purposely walked on him as he lay on the floor reading.

  She stopped by the local corner store on her way home from work. The little bell tinkled when she pushed the door open. There was Lester, behind the counter. He was always behind the counter. He lived there.

  He smiled his toothy grin. “Hey girlie, how’s my best customer?”

  She was his best customer. With the amount of chocolate she’d purchased over the years, he could have retired and moved to Florida years ago. “Hi Lester. Are ya being good?” He loved it when she said that.

  His shoulders moved up and down as he laughed without making a sound. She’d never known anyone who could do that. His eyes would crinkle; his face would light up. His head and shoulders would shake frantically, but he never made a peep.

  “I’m good girl, good. Are you getting a little somethin’ for Sophie?”

  Her cat was famous. She nodded.

  “I hear tell them fellas over at the pier landed a six-hundred-pound tuna today. Might keep her going for a day or two.” His shoulders moved up and down so quickly they were a blur.

  “Oh Lester, what would I do without you?”

  “Well girlie,” he wiped his eyes, “I’m afraid I’m spoken for.”

  Lester had two widows fighting for his affection. They kept him well supplied with hot tea biscuits, oatcakes and mincemeat tarts.

  Yes, she thought, even dear old Lester has a love life. She picked up her paper, three tins of cat food, a lotto ticket and her Cadbury bar. She gave Lester his money, and he patted her hand when he passed her the change.

  “Cheer up girlie.”

  Did she look that bad? What was the matter with everyone?

  Sophie greeted her at the door. She meowed and meowed. There was something wrong. She looked at Lexie with her sweet furry face.

  “What’s the matter, my love?” Oh, please don’t let anything happen to Sophie. She picked her up and gave her a cuddle, but she kept at it. Gosh, that wasn’t like her. Lexie walked down the hall and into the living room.

  She stopped dead.

  Adrian lay by the fire while Gabby straddled him. Her beautiful body glowed in the fireplace light as they moved as one, her gorgeous copper hair cascading down her back. They had eyes only for each other.

  She must have cried out because they turned around, saw her and immediately scrambled to cover up.

  “Oh my God, Lex!” Gabby cried as she reached for her camisole. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen…”

  She couldn’t think of anything to say, except, “In front of Sophie?”

  Adrian jumped into his jeans and started to button them up. “Lexie, wait!”

  She walked out of the house with her cat in her arms.

  Chapter Four

  She spent the night with Beth. She didn’t tell her sister why she needed to sleep on her sofa bed or why she had her cat with her and Beth was too worn out to ask or care. She was busy wading through toys and trying to settle an argument between the girls about who would get to sleep with the giant Pooh Bear their father brought home.

  “I’m going to kill you,” she muttered to Rory.

  Rory shrugged. “Sorry. I didn’t think.”

  Lexie solved the immediate problem by offering to give the girls a bath. She kept them in the tub for about an hour and her nieces couldn’t believe their good fortune. Lexie didn’t have to talk. She just nodded and smiled every now and again. They were so busy chatting, they didn’t notice she never said anything.

  She gathered them up in Michaela’s bed with Pooh Bear in the thick of things, and read them the longest fairy tale she could find. She
didn’t know what it was about but it must have made sense because they were content.

  When Beth got the baby settled, she came to rescue her. The girls were fast asleep. Lexie waved her away. She wanted to have them entwined in her arms. As a matter of fact, she hugged them for dear life.

  Rory took the three oldest with him in the morning. When Lexie asked him where they were going so early, he mumbled something. She realized her sister arranged for them to go out, on account of her.

  Knowing Rory, he’d go to every drive thru in town to keep them in their car seats. The girls hugged her goodbye. He kissed Beth before he disappeared out the back door. She gave him a gentle push. “See you later.”

  He shouted over his shoulder, “See ya, Lexie.”

  “Bye.”

  Beth poured two cups of coffee. She put them on the table and spooned sugar in both.

  “I don’t take sugar.”

  “Today you do.” Beth was the bossiest one in the family. It usually annoyed Lexie but not today.

  Her sister sat at the table. “Well?” She waited.

  Lexie opened her mouth and closed it again. Nothing came out.

  “You remind me of the kids. Out with it.”

  “Adrian and Gabby were making love on my living room rug last night…in front of Sophie.”

  “Holy Hannah.”

  “I couldn’t believe it,” Lexie sobbed as she wiped her watery eyes.

  Beth looked at her feet as she digested the news. “What does she see in him?” was her first question. The next thing out of her mouth was “Good lord, I have to mop this floor.”

  Even though Lexie hated Adrian’s guts at that moment, she was really annoyed by the remark.

  “What do you mean? He’s a nice guy. Or I thought he was.”

  “If he was such a nice guy, he wouldn’t have bonked your sister in front of your furry child.”

  “That’s right,” Lexie agreed wholeheartedly before she snuck her thumbnail in her mouth and filed it down with her teeth.

  Beth suddenly looked at her. “Lexie, I think Gabby’s out of her mind, but aren’t you being a little silly to get this upset about your roommate’s love life? He is an adult. He does live there after all, with your blessing I might add.”

  Lexie opened her mouth to say something and then closed it again.

  Beth took a big swill of coffee. “You look like a guppy. Stop that.”

  My God, she was right. She told everyone Adrian wasn’t her anything. He was a guy who shared the bathroom. He wasn’t her boyfriend. And he’d never given any indication he wanted to be. He never tried to kiss her again after that night by the sink.

  Not only was she upset, she felt stupid. She held her head in her hands. “I’m a moron.”

  Beth patted her arm. “Ordinarily I’d agree with you, but I happen to be on your side for once.”

  Lexie couldn’t believe it. “Why?”

  “Because that little beast cannot keep her paws off anyone’s boyfriend, husband or roommate.”

  “God. She hasn’t gone after Rory?”

  Beth backed up a little. “No. But you know Gabby. All she has to do is look in their direction and they fall at her feet. I’m not sure she always does it on purpose.” She took another sip of coffee and banged her mug on the table. “It ticks me off though. I could never bring a boyfriend home. Sometimes they’d go out with me, just to get invited over. She even made out with Johnny Ferguson in the broom closet once when he was supposedly dating me.” She frowned at the memory. “And why is Gabby with Adrian if she’s supposed to be in love with Prince Eric?”

  Poor Dick would never be known as anything else.

  “She’s nuts! Why would she want Adrian when she has a guy who’s apparently a millionaire? That’s what I’d like to know.”

  Lexie stayed at Beth’s one more night. She couldn’t face Adrian yet. She was too embarrassed. Besides, her sister looked tired. No wonder she was cranky. Lexie never knew how much work four small children could be. After the second night, she dragged her rear end around until she finally plunked down on the sofa bed. “How do you do it, Beth?”

  Beth yawned as she picked up toys and threw them in the direction of the toy box their dad built for Michaela. “When they’re your own, it’s not so bad. Besides, I can’t send them back.”

  “I never thought of it before, but how did Mom do it? She not only looked after us but taught as well.”

  “She’s perfect?”

  Just then Rory yelled from upstairs. “I need help here! I have one in the tub, one on the john, one missing, and one under the sink.”

  Beth hollered, “I’m on my way.”

  “Listen Beth, thanks for everything. You’re right. I’m a grown woman and I acted like a kid when I ran out like that. I better go face the music.”

  Her sister looked back at her and gave her a kind smile. “Good luck, kiddo.”

  Lexie put Sophie in the van once she wiped the snow off. It was a very stormy winter. As soon as she started the motor she felt better. Good old Betsy, filled with rug-hooking supplies, old library books, theatre props and clothes she gathered to take to goodwill. That and lots of chocolate bar wrappers.

  Her mother always grimaced whenever Lexie took her anywhere in it.

  “Really dearest, why don’t you trade in this heap of rusty metal?”

  “This heap, as you call it, starts in minus 30 degree weather, unlike your precious Seville.”

  Her mother had no answer to that, but of course always had the last word. “Well, you should shovel it out now and then.”

  Lexie drove home as slowly as she could. She inevitably arrived but was still hesitant to go in, so she sat behind the wheel and willed her heart to stop racing. She needed to focus on something, so she looked at the house. It had belonged to her Aunt Sally, her father’s eccentric older sister, a card-carrying spinster. She and her dad grew up there and when their parents died, Sally insisted on taking care of it herself, despite Dad’s numerous offers of help. She was a stubborn old bird.

  Of course, now it looked bare and bleak, but in the summer, wild roses bloomed everywhere. And like her parents’ home, the sides of this house disappeared under a leafy mass of green when spring arrived. Ivy for an Ivy house.

  The backyard was a jumble of wild flowers in summer, thanks to another of Aunt Sally’s peculiar ways. She hated grass, refused to have anything to do with it. So she filled her property with lupines, Indian paintbrush, Queen Anne’s lace, buttercups and daisies. Like her aunt, Lexie loved it that way.

  She loved everything about her house. The main floor consisted of a hallway, with stairs on the left, and a living room that could be closed with old glass-paned doors. This room took up most of the right side. Despite being small, the shallow fireplace on the far wall threw a great heat. Aunt Sally’s favourite white mirror hung above the intricate carved mantle.

  The old-fashioned kitchen took up the back of the house, and an ancient harvest table, with a hodgepodge of old chairs around it, took up most of the room. Nothing matched but that was fine.

  The shelves underneath had checkered cloth hiding them. There was a pantry, where she baked, as her Aunt Sally did when Lexie was a child. Jars, glass bottles and preserves took up all the shelves.

  Her bedroom upstairs was crowded with old bureaus and Aunt Sally’s sleigh bed. The wallpaper was so ancient, its pattern of roses was back in style. Her wooden floors were painted and covered with worn hooked mats that had been there since she could remember.

  Adrian’s room was across the hall, a smaller version of her own. Beside it was the bathroom, which was large enough for a rocking chair and an old chest of drawers that held towels and books. The best feature was the deep, claw-footed tub, heavenly for soaking in.

  Everyone was shocked when Aunt Sally left the house to Lexie. She asked Dad why she would do such a thing. He said his sister recognized a kindred spirit when she saw one.

  Running out of rooms to ponder, Lexie s
hook off her reverie and took a deep breath. She noticed the snow drifted along the front porch stairs. Oh, well done Adrian. He didn’t shovel it for her. Here was something else she could brood about. She turned off the engine, grabbed Sophie and readied herself to face her roommate.

  “Adrian!” she shouted as she closed the front door. She waited to hear his feet thump down the stairs.

  Nothing.

  “Ade!”

  The place felt empty. He wasn’t home. She went into the kitchen and put the kettle on. She took off her gloves and threw them on the table. That’s when she noticed the note propped up against the salt and pepper shakers.

  As Sophie rubbed her legs in a figure eight and purred loudly to express her pleasure at being home, Lexie stumbled to the table and picked up the note.

  “I’m sorry Lexie,” was all it said.

  She stood and looked at the empty hangers in his closet. The phone rang. She walked downstairs and sat on the chair next to it. She didn’t pick up.

  “Lexie, it’s Mom. Call me please, it’s urgent.”

  She wanted to. She couldn’t do it.

  The phone rang again.

  Mom sounded hysterical. “Lexie. Pick up.”

  She did. “What’s wrong Mom?”

  “It’s your sister.” She heard her mother blow her nose.

  “Which one?”

  “Gabby.”

  She got a chill. “What about Gabby?”

  “I just received the strangest call from Richard. He’s very upset. He called Gabby from Chicago and her roommates were under the impression she was with him. Gabby told them she’d be staying there for awhile. She packed her clothes and left. They didn’t think any more of it, just assumed she flew to O’Hare yesterday. But she never arrived. He’s beside himself. Oh my God, Lexie. You don’t think something horrible has happened, do you?”

  Lexie took a deep breath. “Gabby’s run away with Adrian, Mom.”

  “Who’s Adrian?”

  “My weird friend.”

  “No.”

  “Yes.”

  “Is she out of her mind?”

  “Is he out of his mind?”