“A horrible thing. She’s cost me my dream job.”
“Put a pin in that for a moment. We’ll circle back to that in a second.”
“Fine,” Alissa said, feeling like a petulant child. Why wasn’t Mom on her side?
“Jed’s in a real tough spot, and I see that frown—don’t think that I’m defending him or that I’m okay with how he’s handled this, but I am asking you to see things from his perspective. He’s being forced to choose between the woman he wants to marry and the woman who gave him life. No matter how horrible his mother is, she is still his mother, and it would be very hard for him to turn his back on her, even for the woman he loves. And yet, from what you’re telling me, he’s willing to do just that. To walk away from his family and give up the job he loves and, from what I gather, a ton of money. And on top of everything, he’s convinced himself that this is all his fault?”
“That’s right.”
“Do you think this is all Jed’s fault?”
“I can’t marry into a family that hates me,” Alissa said. Even as she said it, she wasn’t sure that it was true.
“Be careful of the lines you draw in the sand, sweetie. Life and love sometimes make them blurry. Look, I’m not going to sit here and tell you that it wouldn’t be difficult. People say you marry the person and not their family, but the fact of the matter is, his family is important to him, and it’s not realistic to think that he won’t ever want them in his life. I think the more important issue is, how do you and Jed learn to stand together and face difficulties, rather than either blaming each other or giving up when it gets tough? You both made choices that brought you here. Now, how do you get through it together?”
Alissa tried to keep up with what Mom was saying, but a ringing in her ears was making it nearly impossible to do so. “I didn’t say it was rational, but somehow I feel like he should’ve protected me.”
“I agree. That’s not rational. You made the choice to waitress in a club where women dance in front of men for money. It was your decision to risk your reputation by working there.” She raised a hand. “I’m not judging you or the women who dance there. People have to make hard choices for survival or to meet life goals. But your error is in thinking that your actions might not have consequences. You weighed the risks and decided that helping your friend and paying off your debts were worth it, right?”
“That’s right.”
“You’re a survivor, Alissa. Just like your sisters. You don’t need help from anyone, and you sure as heck don’t need a man to protect you.”
“I’m not sure I’m following.”
“Your decision may have cost you your job, but you don’t answer to anyone but God,” Mom said. “If you believed in your heart it was the right thing to do, then I support you one hundred percent. Mrs. Marsh’s actions may have hurt you, but you chose to work there. Thus, you have to own that. I didn’t teach you to be ashamed, did I?”
“No.”
“Then, it’s pretty simple. If the school fires you because of something you do outside of their property, then so be it. You’ll get another job. You’re a wonderful teacher and any school would be lucky to have you.”
“I guess so.” Was Mom right? Could she get another job?
“As far as Jed goes, only he can set the boundaries for his relationship with his mother and decide what influence he’ll allow her to have over him. It sounds like he’s trying to do that, but it also sounds like he’s taking responsibility for her actions, and in letting him do so, you’ve done him an injustice.”
“I have?” Her voice trembled. Mom had always been firm but compassionate when she or her sisters had made mistakes. But this felt different. Like she’d let her down in a way that couldn’t be forgiven.
“I’m sorry, but I think so. He came to you and offered to walk away, not knowing what else he could do. Instead of meeting him with love and assurances that you could weather any storm together, you confirmed his worst fears.”
Alissa looked down at her lap, twisting her fingers.
“Sweetie, what you and Jed have is rare. Does your relationship have challenges? Yes. Whenever family doesn’t support a marriage, the union is harder to preserve. But you two have to fight for each other.”
“What do I do?”
“Do you want to be his wife?” Mom asked.
“Yes.” She did. Of course she did. A weight lifted from her shoulders. What was she doing? Mom was right. This wasn’t Jed’s fault. He’d sacrificed everything for her, and she’d treated him terribly.
“You talk to him. You share what you’re thinking and what you’re feeling. You encourage him to do the same. And you both have to listen to each other. Really listen! If the two of you are committed to your love, then you have to move forward unified together. You can’t let outside forces tear you apart, and you can’t just walk away or let him walk away when it gets hard. You have to dig in and stick it out until you find a way. Love will always find a way, sweetie, but you have to be willing to fight for it.”
Chapter 8
The next morning, Alissa woke late. She went to the window and looked out at the snowy landscape, thinking through her next move. After the talk with her mother, she knew it was up to her to reach out to Jed and apologize for the way she’d reacted. Would he even want to talk to her? Regardless, she had to try.
She and her family had all kinds of activities planned, but she would call him first to see if he would come out to talk through their problems. If he didn’t want her anymore, it was best to know that now.
Taking a deep breath, she punched in his number. Jed answered on the first ring.
“It’s me,” Alissa said.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, I’m fine. Are you?”
“No. I’m miserable,” he said.
“I mean, I’m physically okay,” she said. “But I’m miserable too. I don’t want to live without you.”
“Me either.”
“I’m at the lodge. My family convinced me to come anyway. I was thinking you should come out here. We can talk through things.” She took in another shaky breath. “I was wrong to react the way I did. I love you.”
“What’re you saying?”
“We can’t let your mother ruin what we have. I made a mistake blaming you. A terrible mistake, and I’m sorry. Come here. Let’s talk through this and come up with a plan. Together.”
“What do I have to offer you now?”
“You. That’s all I’ve ever wanted anyway. We’ll both get new jobs. All the contacts you’ve made over the years will lead you to a new position. You’ll be on your own without having to answer to your family. Think of how free you’ll be.”
There was silence on the other end of the phone for a few seconds. “Do you mean it? You want me even after my mother ruined your life?”
“She didn’t ruin my life. My life is you and my family, not my job. I shouldn’t have hidden a part of myself or been ashamed that I needed an extra job to make ends meet. If anything, the world should be ashamed that a teacher can’t make enough to live without an extra job. My mother didn’t raise me to be ashamed of being a survivor. If the school fires me, so what? There are other schools, other jobs.”
“My bag’s still packed,” he said. “I didn’t have the heart to put everything away.”
“Pick it up and get to the airport.”
“I won’t be able to get a flight today, but I’ll be on the first one out on the twenty-first.”
“I’ll be here.”
“I love you,” he said.
“Wait, Jed, do you still want to marry me?”
“It’s the only thing I’ve ever wanted.”
She called her principal next. He picked up after a few rings.
“Alissa, hi. What’s up? Aren’t you supposed to be getting married about now?”
“Um, yeah. I was calling about the photographs,” she said.
“What about them?”
She gulped back
a nervous breath. “I wondered if I still have a job.”
“What? Of course you do. I wouldn’t fire you for having another job. You’re not the only staff member moonlighting for extra cash.”
“Oh, well, yes, but I thought given the nature of my other job that you’d have to fire me to please the parents.”
“Alissa, what you do outside of school is no one’s business.”
“What about the conservative parents? They won’t be happy. She sent them to the PTA president.”
“Calista Wells doesn’t run this school. I do.”
“She’s contacted you, hasn’t she?” Alissa asked.
“Yes. She contacted me almost immediately. Just as she did when Jacob Munro came out. I told her the same thing I told her when she demanded I fire him for being gay. No, thank you.”
“What about enrollment?” she asked. “Will this cause problems?”
“There’s a long waiting list. If families leave, there are others to take their places. We’re good at what we do here, Alissa. People know that. If they don’t like that my teachers are not all the same, then too bad. I know the kind of teacher you are, and that’s all I care about.”
Alissa let out a long sigh of relief. “Really?”
“Jesus is quite clear about who’s to do the judging. And it’s not us. Now, you put this out of your mind, and enjoy your wedding and honeymoon. I’ll see you in January.”
She hung up as happy tears gathered at the corners of her eyes. Principal Hughes was a good man and a great boss.
Jed would be here tomorrow. Dare she hope that they would get married after all? Please, God, help us work through this.
Chapter 9
The next afternoon, Alissa paced in her room while waiting for Jed.
Yesterday had been packed with fun, thanks to her sisters. She hadn’t said anything about her phone call with Jed or that he would arrive later today. If they weren’t able to work things out, she didn’t want her family to have hope that the wedding would happen. She flushed thinking about how embarrassing this entire fiasco had been. Her sisters had gone to such lengths to make everything better for her and all she could do was think about Jed.
Finally, there was a knock on the door. Jed!
She ran to the door and yanked it open. He stood there with a suitcase next to him. He’d shaved since she last saw him, but it did nothing to disguise his exhaustion. Still, at the sight of her, he smiled. “Hey there.”
“Hi,” she said, suddenly shy.
“Can I come in?”
“Yes, yes. Sorry.” She stepped aside and let him pass though.
He set his suitcase near the door. “You look so good.”
“Oh, Jed, I’ve missed you so much.” She stumbled toward him, and he drew her into his arms.
“Me too, baby.” He held her so tightly she could barely breathe.
“I don’t want to do life without you. I’ve messed everything up.”
He buried his face into her shoulder. “I thought I might lose my mind without you.”
“We have to talk through this.”
He drew away, looking into her eyes. “Yes. I’m ready. Are you?”
She nodded and led him over to the chairs in front of the fireplace. They sat facing each other.
“I have to start by saying how sorry I am,” she said. “My reaction was completely unfair. I have no excuse other than I felt trapped and exposed.”
“I understand. I felt the same way. Trapped and unworthy of you.” He hadn’t stopped staring at her since he arrived, as if she were a meal and he was famished.
“But you were wrong to suggest that I’d be better off without you, or that you were somehow responsible for what happened. Your mother’s a troubled person. We don’t need her toxicity in our lives. But you’re going to have to decide how to deal with her in a way that doesn’t wreck what we have.”
He grimaced. “She’s called a few times. I didn’t pick up. I don’t know what the future holds, but for now I’m prepared to no longer have a relationship with them. I have to say, I feel free. All this time I thought the business meant so much to me and it turns out it really doesn’t.”
“I don’t know what to say.” Her throat ached from how much she loved him. How good he was. How perfect he was for her.
“Say you love me.”
“I love you. You know I do. And I was wrong about how the photos would affect my job.” She told him then about her discussion with Principal Hughes. “He assured me that my job is safe.”
“Even with the PTA coven of witches?” he asked.
“He’s not afraid of them.”
“That’s amazing,” Jed said. “I’m surprised, though.”
“I was too. My mom was fine with it all too. I should never have kept it from my family.”
“You have nothing to be ashamed of,” Jed said.
“Will you lose your house?” she asked, matter-of-factly. “If so, we need to find a new apartment.”
“What? No, no. I’m sorry if I wasn’t clear. The house is mine. I bought it during a downturn in the market for cash. We’ll always have a home.”
She sighed with relief. “I’m so glad. I hated the thought of you losing something you love so much.”
“Let me be clear. The only thing I really care about is you, but yes, having a home to raise our family in means a lot.”
He reached his hand across the arms of the chair and caressed her forearm. “Are you sure it’s me you want, even with all my baggage?”
“I’ve been sure since the first.” She smiled back at him. “You and me forever.”
“You and me forever.”
And although they were not yet husband and wife, they fell together on the bed and made sure the other knew exactly how committed they were to their future.
The day of the wedding was clear and cold. Freshly fallen snow glittered in the sun outside the window. Mom and Nan had already done their makeup by the time they arrived. Once everyone was assembled, Mom did Jo’s and Stevie’s faces. Even Stevie was into it, only complaining a few times about how long it took and that she didn’t want too much eye makeup. When Jo’s was finished, she looked as glamorous as a movie star.
When it was time for them all to don their dresses, they got Hailey into hers first. She looked like a fairy princess in the dusty-blue dress. “Oh, Hailey, you’re so pretty,” Alissa said. It wasn’t just the dress either. She had a glow about her. If she didn’t know better, Alissa would have thought her little sister was in love.
“You’re absolutely perfect,” Nan said.
Next, Hailey zipped up Mom’s dress, a light gray in a mermaid style with fluffy feathers around the neckline. Mom always has to have her feathers, Alissa thought, smiling. The skirt, made of tulle and layered with sequins at the top, swirled around her legs.
“Mom, you look even more stunning than usual,” Alissa said, as she fluffed the feathers.
“Your turn.” Hailey bounced on her feet. “I can’t wait to see you in your dress.”
Mom brought the wedding gown from the closet and held it open for Alissa to step into, then buttoned her up.
“Oh, honey, you’re just perfect,” Mom said.
“You’re the most beautiful bride in the world,” Hailey added, before reaching for the veil. With deft hands, her little sister secured the delicate material into her hair, then set the skinny tiara in place. They’d pulled the front of her hair back, leaving her bangs loose and her long neck exposed.
Alissa stared at herself in the mirror, pleased with what she saw. Since meeting Jed, she saw herself differently; perhaps she saw herself as he did? All she knew was that she felt beautiful and so very joyful. “I’m going to be Jed’s wife,” she whispered.
Mom and Hailey stood next to her, and all of them beamed into the mirror. “We’ve come a long way from the scared little rug rats we were that first night together, haven’t we, Hailey?”
Her little sister nodded, obviously too choked
up to answer.
“Do you remember how scared we were?” Alissa asked. “How unsure we were of the future? Now look at us.”
“I’m very proud of both of you,” Mom said.
A loud knock on the door broke up the moment. Hailey rushed over to answer. It was room service, with a bottle of champagne. When they all had glasses, Alissa raised hers for a toast.
“Thank you for being here. I know I didn’t make this exactly easy over the last few days. I’m sorry for all the drama, but I guess it was my turn to make a fuss. I’ve been reminded since meeting Jed’s family how very lucky I am to have all of you. There’s never been a time, since we became a unit, that I haven’t been able to rely on you for love and support. You have no idea how much it means to me to be part of this clan.” She turned to her mother. “Mom, we can never say it enough how much you mean to us. If it hadn’t been for your huge heart and willingness to take on all of us at once, I don’t know where I’d be.”
“Where any of us would be,” Stevie said.
“So, here’s to us,” Alissa said. “Soul sisters and our lovely mother and Nan.”
They clinked glasses.
Mom fanned her eyes. “Listen now, I can’t cry and ruin my makeup. But I just have to say how proud I am of each of you. Since the moment you came to me, my life has been full of love and so many happy moments—even during the chaotic years. There hasn’t been one day I haven’t thanked God for putting us all together. Thank you for letting me be your mom.”
“And for letting me be your grandmother,” Nan said.
They all clinked glasses again and drank the rest of the champagne. Just as they finished, Hailey’s phone buzzed.
“It’s time,” Hailey said. “They’re ready for us in the lobby.”
Alissa squeezed Mom’s hand. “I’m suddenly nervous.”
“Just hold on tight to me,” Mom said. “We’ll be fine.”
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