Fury (New Adult Romance) - #1.5 Fierce Series

by Clarissa Wild

  My fingers drift across the note stuck to the machine as I read the words out loud: “Use Tide Vivid White detergent for white clothes. Put it in a capsule and place it inside.”

  Right. I always forget what to put where and what type of detergent I should choose. Always happy with my notes. They make me remember what I keep forgetting.

  I try not to think about that fact. Makes it easier to live with.

  I turn on the washing machine and let it do its work while I turn on the shower. Having problems with a washing machine is normal to me. Just like many other things in life. I know it sounds ridiculous, but simple tasks can sometimes be very difficult for me to do. I don’t always know how to do them. There are some things I can’t remember, even when I did them only five minutes ago. Other things stay with me like they’re permanent marks in my brain.

  And other times, I can’t remember something even though I’ve tried a gazillion times. It just won’t stick.

  I don’t know why this had to happen to me, but it did, and that’s all there is to it.

  All I know is that it’s not my fault, and that I can’t do anything about it. Both make me pissed.

  I shrug the water off me and turn off the shower again, grabbing a towel along the way.

  For a moment I stop drying my hair. My mind goes blank for a second, and it feels like there’s something missing, or something out of place. Something that I’m supposed to remember.

  I hate this feeling.

  Frowning, I throw the towel into the bin and walk outside. I snatch the last clean boxer briefs from my bed and hurry to get my clothes on. My eyes scan the room, looking for more notes, but there are none out of the ordinary. However, I’m sure I’m missing something.

  I step into the living room, which is only a few feet from my bedroom. This house only has one floor. I know it’s not much, but it’s all we have. I’m just happy we can still afford a home.

  It smells like fermented cheese in here, and for some reason my instincts tell me to inspect the couch. My brother’s always hungry late at night, if he comes home that is. He always eats cheesy chips while he’s half asleep on the couch.

  I look around, but he’s not here, and I don’t find any crumbs tucked into the couch bedding. The usual stain from his boots is missing from the carpet, and I don’t see his jacket lying on the table.

  Where the hell is he?

  Sighing, I rub my index finger across my forehead. Dammit. He didn’t come home last night. Again.

  Shit. How can anyone work for so many hours? It’s gotta wear you out. They’re using him like a workhorse. Not to mention the fact that it’s completely fucked up and dangerous.

  I wanna drag him back home, but I know I can’t. What he’s doing right now, dealing, it’s vital. We need the money, and this is the only way to get it easily. We won’t survive without it. I won’t survive without him.

  But I don’t want this to continue much longer. I don’t remember how long it’s been, but it’s been way too long, that I do know. Things should’ve been better by now, but sadly they aren’t, and I’m confronted with it every freaking day of my life.

  Sometimes I wish I could find a job so I could help with our struggles, but Jessie insists I go to college instead. He says he knows firsthand nobody will hire guys like us. No way.

  Not like this.

  The only way is to earn a degree and hope for a better chance. I know for a fact he would be so much better suited for this, but he insists I’m the one who has to go there. Just the thought of having to sit in those benches and listen to those boring lectures for hours makes me cringe.

  However, I’m not going to disappoint my brother. He wants me to do this, and I’m doing this for him. For us.

  I walk into the kitchen and make myself some breakfast with whatever dry bread we have left. Then I discover a note I haven’t seen before hanging from the cupboard. It’s not my writing. I grab the note and read it.

  ‘Job. Back in 2 days. Will check up on u in college later. Jaret’s picking u up. Gl. Jessie.’

  I wonder how long this note has been here, because I don’t remember reading it.

  Must’ve forgotten.

  A tiny smile forms on my face. I’m glad Jessie hangs these notes for me everywhere, or else I’d forget pretty much everything.

  Crumpling it up in my hand, I take a bite from my sandwich and hear a car honking. Shit, Jessie was really serious. He got Jaret to pick me up?

  Rolling my eyes, I grab my backpack and fill it up to the brim with the second-hand books I got and hurry out the door. Glad I already brought most of my stuff to campus yesterday.

  Jaret’s convertible Mazda rolls down the street, knocking over a trashcan standing near the side of the road. He rolls down his window. “Hey, dude!”

  “Hey,” I say, closing the door to my house. I make my way across the trash-littered stone path and try not to look at the overgrown patches of grass that look more like a swamp than a garden.

  “Where’s the enthusiasm, man?” Jaret says, patting the side of his car. “C’mon! We’re going to freaking college!”

  He yelps and yowls like an animal.

  I shake my head and laugh. “You’re crazy, you know that?”

  “Damn right I am! And you know what else? I like it! I’m a chick magnet, that’s what.” He lowers his shades and looks at me from underneath them, wriggling his eyebrows. “You gettin’ in or what?”

  I walk around to the passenger seat and open the door. The smell of his aftershave drifts out of the car like a bomb that just exploded. I wave away the suffocating cloud as I sit down and throw my bag to the back.

  “What?” Jaret says, holding up his hands, his eyebrows raised.

  “Dude …” I say. “It’s just college. Stop with the overload on aftershave, especially if you wanna bunk with me, or you’ll get me killed.” I laugh it off.

  “Sorry, but I gotta smell nice for the chicks. You have to. Trust me. And God, wait ’til you see them.” He bites his lip, chuckling. “They’re not just regular girls, if you know what I’m saying.” He spreads his fingers in front of his chest and makes squeezing motions. “Chicks, man!”

  I shake my head again and laugh.

  Jaret punches me in the shoulder. “This is gonna be the time of our lives! Partying, smoking pot.”

  “Never,” I say, chuckling a little, even though I truly mean it.

  I will never, ever, use that stuff. Ever.

  “Shit, you still worried about that?” He raises his brows. “There’s nothing wrong with working hard for stuff. I work hard. Look what I drive.” He puts up a smug smile.

  “Just drive, will ya?”

  “Hey, you’re getting a ride for free ’cause you’re Jessie’s brother. Not because you’re nice. Lighten up a little.”

  “Yeah, yeah,” I say as he steps on the gas.

  Lighten up a little. Of course. I’ll just snap my fingers and turn cheerful, easy as that.

  ♥♥♥

  When we arrive on campus I rush to get out of the car and smell some fresh air again. I’m feeling anxious just looking at that huge building. I can’t imagine myself studying. Not at all. But I don’t want to disappoint my brother, so I force myself to breathe out and relax. I can do this.

  I slam the door shut.

  “Hey! Be a little gentle on her,” Jaret yells as he steps out and treats the car like it’s fragile. “What’s up with you anyway?”

  I chew my cheek and frown, not wanting to talk about it. I have enough on my plate as is.

  “What are you so worried about? It’s just college,” Jaret says, leaning over the hood of the car.

  “I know,” I grumble, throwing my backpack over my shoulder.

  “Then what … Oh …” He sighs. “It’s your brother, isn’t it? You’re still thinking about all that?”

  “I’m fucking pissed he lets them pull his strings. Yes, of course I’m still thinking about that.”

  “Hey, we’re not
that bad. Sure we deal drugs and all that, but at least we can make a nice living off it.”

  “Like it fucking matters! Jessie keeps throwing everything away and then tells me to go and live my life like a normal person. It ain’t happening.”

  We’re both leaning on his car now, having a not-so-casual conversation about our fucked-up lives like it’s the most normal thing in the world.

  “Your brother just wants the best for you. He’s in it so you won’t have to be,” Jaret says.

  I look down at the ground, feeling guilty, knowing full well why my brother is in this mess. He cares so much about me that he risks his life for it.

  I’m grateful, yet I can’t stop feeling incredibly angry. There’s this uncontrollable fury raging inside me, and I don’t know what to do with it.

  “If you need someone to talk to, I’m here, dude.”

  I chortle and close my eyes. “Oh, c’mon, are we on Oprah now? Don’t give me that psychological bull, please.”

  “What?” He raises his arms. “My sister watches those shows like twenty-four-seven. I can’t help catching onto a few things.”

  I roll my eyes. “Let’s just go. I’ve had enough time on the psych bench now.”

  “Hey, Jaret!”

  There are a bunch of guys on the grass behind the parking lot, and they’re signaling him. Jaret briefly glances at them before turning his head back toward me. His lip twitches and he clears his throat.

  “Are those some of the guys from the gang?” I ask.

  “Yep, they’re Alpha Psi all right,” he says, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

  “Introduce me.”

  “What?” he says, arching one of his brows.

  “I wanna know more.”

  Jaret sucks in his lips and frowns, his eyes skidding from left to right. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

  “Just introduce me, all right?”

  “Fine,” he says, sighing.

  I walk past him, but he pulls me back by the collar of my shirt. “Wait.”

  He briefly turns his head to see if they’re watching, and then takes off his jacket.

  “What are you doing?” I say, laughing.

  He holds it up in the air. “Put it on.”

  “What? I’m not putting on your jacket.”

  “Put. It. On.”

  “No; why would I need yours? I got one back in our room.” Did he forget we already brought all my stuff to our dorm room?

  “Dude, you look like a fucking pussy without it. Wanna meet the guys? Then you need this.”

  He presses the jacket firmly against my chest and waits until my hands have gone through the sleeves before he takes his eyes off me again.

  “Better.” He smirks.

  I roll my eyes and wince when I raise my arms. “Did you rub your dick on it or something? Fuck …”

  Jaret laughs. “You won’t get anywhere with flattery, now c’mon.”

  I lick my hand and run my fingers through my hair, making stupid faces at him. “Do I look fancy enough now?” I say with a fake British accent.

  Jaret laughs out loud. “Like a fucking sparkling rainbow pony.”

  I purse my lips to hold back the laughter. We walk toward the group of guys, and I try to keep my cool as they stare us down. They’re clearly not happy with me approaching, since their gazes primarily zoom in on me.

  My muscles tense up the closer we get.

  “Hey, guys,” Jaret says, breaking the ice.

  “Yo.”

  Jaret shakes hands with a guy twice my size. He’s covered in tattoos and almost rips his shirt just by moving. He briefly glances at me, and then back at Jaret, squinting.

  “Who’s this?”

  “Jessie’s little brother.”

  I guess bringing my brother into the conversation is the safest way to introduce me. Great tactic.

  “Is that so?” The guy ogles me from top to bottom like I’m fresh meat ready for the slaughterhouse.

  “Hunter Bane,” I say, clearing my throat.

  The guy smirks, nodding. “You got some balls.”

  “The size of rocks. You can trust him,” Jaret says quickly.

  The guy chortles. “Sure.” He raises his hand and grabs mine, squeezing it hard. “Name’s Wes.”

  “So you’re Jessie’s brother, huh? I’m impressed one of you managed to get into college,” another guy sneers patronizingly.

  My fingers curl. I try to ignore the comment, but my blood is boiling already. I can’t start a fight with the people involved with Jessie. I won’t let him get hurt, even if it means kissing their asses.

  “So, you got enough or you need some from me?” one of them says to Jaret.

  Jaret takes out a bag of white pills and briefly shows it to them before tucking it back into his pants. The guys start talking about the amount and type of drugs they’re carrying and who they’re gonna trade them with. I’m just standing there listening to their conversation like someone who doesn’t belong.

  They’re so focused on the conversation that they’re completely ignoring me. It’s as if I no longer exist, but that’s a good thing. It means I can blend in and take their information with me without them even being suspicious.

  My gaze drifts away as I try to be as inconspicuous as possible, and my eyes catch a glimpse of a girl whose skirt is halfway up in the air because of a leaf blower. For a moment I zone out completely, watching her curly brown hair swoosh up into the sky as she desperately tries to keep her panties from being seen.

  Oh … but it’s already too late for that.

  The corner of my lip quirks up when the blower stops and all that’s left of her is one giant mess. Her hair is coiled up, her clothes are wrinkly, and she’s covered with leaves. It’s hard not to laugh, and for a second I completely forget about the guys talking about how they’ve watched someone snort himself to death.

  Her round, dark blue eyes skid around the premises, checking if anyone saw her.

  Oh, yes, I did.

  I can’t stop looking at her. It’s too amusing not to.

  When her eyes settle on me, she freezes. Now I really can’t look away anymore. No, seriously. She has the most radiant blue eyes I’ve ever seen. So pure and … perfect.

  The glasses she wears are too big for her, but they look so damn good on her as well. Attractive, even.

  Her cheeks turn three shades of pink, and I can’t help but enjoy how sweet it looks. Not cute-sweet. More like candy-sweet. Like I want to lick the color off her skin.

  I shouldn’t be thinking about this right now, but I am. It’s been a while since I last fixated on a girl like this. For some reason she’s caught my attention. Although I can clearly tell she doesn’t want any of it.

  Suddenly, she turns her head and scurries off immediately, with a weird gait that reminds me of a penguin. I chuckle, but then notice something glinting in the grass precisely where she was standing a moment before.

  Curious, I walk toward it. The guys don’t even ask where I’m going. I bend over and pick up something metallic and shiny. I hold it up close, because it’s so small I can’t recognize it immediately. But then I realize it’s a bracelet she must’ve dropped while being blown away by leaves.

  I chuckle again at the reminder. Those leaves made her look like a centerpiece. A pretty, messy centerpiece.

  I don’t even know her name, and I’m already fascinated by her.

  Strange.

  This leaf girl is doing weird things to my brain. Turning it off, as a matter of fact.

  I can still see her walking toward the dorm; the exact same dorm I’m staying in. Hmm … She’ll be missing this bracelet soon. Guess I should pay her a visit. Now I have the perfect excuse.

  Chapter 2

  Pretty Girls and Their Bracelets

  Her frizzy brown hair is all I need to see to know it’s her. Her round, perky ass sways back and forth as she walks through the dorm. Her skirt reaches just above her knees, giving hints of slender thigh
s. I can already imagine slipping my fingers right underneath.

  My tongue dips out to lick my lips. Damn.

  I’m following her down the hallway, but she hasn’t noticed me yet, too busy with getting the leaves out of her hair.

  She walks into a room barely five feet away from mine. What a coincidence.

  The moment I hear squeals, I turn around and walk back to my own room. Shit. Her roommate. I was hoping I could catch her alone, but I guess I’ll have to wait.

  I throw my bag in a corner and sit down on my bed, running my fingers through my hair. Goddammit. I can’t stop thinking about going to her and giving her that bracelet back, but I don’t want to intrude either. But I’m afraid I might forget about it if I don’t do it now. Besides, I’m sure she’s going to want it back someday.

  I open my bag, take out a stack of notes I always bring with me, and start penning down the important things. The classes I’m supposed to take, which books are for which class, where I’m supposed to go each day, what time I’m supposed to be where, and of course that I have to give ‘Leafy’ her bracelet back.

  I smirk, realizing I probably won’t be needing the note anyway. I can clearly hear their loud voices. Plus, I’ve been playing around with the bracelet since I got my hands on it.

  No way I’m going to forget about this.

  A door slamming shut catches my attention, and my eyes jerk up toward the door. I hear them say goodbye, and then a dude with short blond hair walks past my room. His eyes narrow as he briefly glances at me, his pace momentarily slowing down.

  We stare each other down in that one second our eyes connect. I don’t know why he’s looking at me like that, but something tells me it’s not good. It feels like a threat.

  Then he’s out of my sight.

  I sigh and relax again. Damn. Everywhere I go I feel like I have to be careful. Like the gang is watching me twenty-four-seven.

  I slam the bed with my fist and then stretch my fingers, cracking them. I can’t believe I’m doing this, but there’s no turning back now. I’m in this school, and I’m going to make my brother proud.