Beyond What is Given

by Rebecca Yarros

  “A window seat. I mean, it’s almost my perfect house. Hardwood in the kitchen, granite counters, porch swing out front, a big backyard… It’s almost there.”

  “And the window seat would make it perfect?”

  “A window seat and a view of the front range.” She smiled wistfully.

  “You want to live in Colorado?” My stomach plummeted.

  “It’s the only place that’s ever really felt like home. I still have this hope that I can get back in. Even if I have to face him, it would be worth it.”

  “You can. Are you excited to see your mom?”

  She nodded. “It’ll be nice to spend a few days with her. Definitely worth making up my classwork for. Her homecoming is still on schedule, so this time tomorrow night, I’ll have her.”

  “And this time Thursday I’ll pick you up in the Outer Banks,” I promised.

  “That, I can’t wait for.” She cupped my cheek. “Look, just because I’m there, don’t think you have to…” Her gaze fell away. “I mean, I don’t expect to bake brownies with your mom or anything.”

  “One, if you bake brownies with my mom, please get her recipe. She’s insanely stingy with it. Second, Samantha, I’m not hiding you. In fact, my parents want all of you to come over for dinner when we get there. You’re a part of my life, and I want them to know you.”

  A small family gathering was exactly perfect to introduce her to our madness.

  “I’ll wear a longer skirt,” she promised.

  “Just be you, Sam. That’s all I need.”

  She sat up on my lap and kissed me softly, sweetly. “I’m going to miss you.”

  I captured her hand with mine and pressed a kiss to her palm, savoring her indrawn breath. “Same here. Have I ever told you what beautiful hands you have?” Everything was beautiful on her, fingers included.

  “You’ll like them better once they’re on you,” she promised, her eyes darkening.

  “Anytime you want, Samantha.” Sex wasn’t something we’d really discussed, and our hands had stayed strictly above clothes, although I wasn’t sure how much longer I could keep my hands off her skin without going insane.

  “Soon,” she whispered.

  “Soon.”

  “Hey, you should be at the airport,” I lectured Sam, balancing my phone on my shoulder so I could check my watch.

  “We’re pulling into the airport,” she said.

  “Good. I just got here to help Jagger unload.”

  “I’m glad you got out early today.”

  “Me, too.” We’d all been able to catch an earlier flight, which gave me a couple hours to kill before I got my hands on Sam. Almost six days without touching her was killing me.

  “Don’t be a dick!” Morgan yelled at Carter as he held the tiny strings of her swimsuit high above his head.

  “Wear something that covers more than two percent of your body!”

  “Or maybe not…”

  Sam laughed. “I can hear them from here.”

  Comfortable silence passed while I heard the doors opening and shutting. “I’ll see you in a couple hours?”

  “Yeah…” She drew out the word.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Hold on a sec.” She put the phone down while she said good-bye to her mom, and then picked it up again. “Sorry. She’s not one for good-byes, so I try to give her an excuse to not look all emotionally unavailable.”

  “I’m happy to be your excuse. What’s really bothering you?”

  She sighed, and I pictured her lower lip between her teeth. “I was at her welcome-home ceremony, and there was this woman there, balancing a little girl on her hip.”

  “Okay.”

  “It could just be that homecomings are emotional. Especially for me since Ember’s dad died? It’s probably stupid.” There was a rustling of paper. “Roanoke,” she told the attendant. “Thank you so much.”

  “So you were emotional?” I kept at her because if I didn’t, she wasn’t going to offer up the truth.

  “Yeah. This mom was maybe a year or two older than I am, but she’d held herself together through a deployment with a kid, and I was lucky to have not ended up a stripper.”

  “I’m listening.”

  “How freaking long is this line? Security sucks.” I heard flights called through her speaker while she debated, so I waited. “She was the kind of woman you’ll need. Someone who can handle her own crap and shoulder yours, too. Someone who isn’t a giant pain in the ass.”

  “You’re not a pain in my ass. In fact, you have a very nice ass.”

  “Focus, Grayson. It just hit me. You’re in the army. That means deployments, and PCS moves, and temporary duty assignments, and all the shit that comes with it.”

  I clamped down on the panic that was clawing its way up my throat. “Does that bother you?” I waited. “Sam?”

  “That’s the thing. It’s everything I’ve sworn up and down that I don’t want in my life. There’s never been a big enough pro to outweigh the cons of that lifestyle for me.” Fuck. “But even when I’m looking at all the cons, it still doesn’t stop me from wanting you, from choosing you. What does that even mean?”

  That we’re done dancing around this. That I’m yours as much as you are mine. Fuck, why couldn’t she be here for this conversation? My hands itched to touch her, assure her.

  “Just get here, Sam.”

  “So we can beat this subject to death?”

  “So I can kiss the hell out of you.” My voice dropped an octave.

  “That may be worth standing in this line.”

  Two hours, and then I had four days to introduce her to my family, my home, and maybe make her realize that I was the only pro she’d ever need on that list. “Oh, it will be, I promise.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Grayson

  “What do you have in here, an elephant?” I asked Sam as I carried her suitcase up to the third floor of the rented beach house.

  “Oh, come on. Like you don’t have the muscles to carry a few pairs of shoes?” she teased, tossing back a flirty grin. The white, wide-brimmed sunhat just about did me in. Or maybe it was the flirty, pale green sundress, or seeing her here in the Outer Banks.

  “Few pairs. Right.”

  I followed into her bedroom, set her suitcase down at the foot of the king-size bed, and cursed the fact that I’d promised my mother I’d sleep at home. That mattress was going to swallow Sam’s tiny frame whole if I didn’t hold down one side. Stop making excuses and admit that you’d kill to sleep next to her.

  I glanced around the room. It was a typical OBX rental, decorated in soft blues and whites. “And remind me why you had to have the room farthest away from everyone?” I asked, turning to see her open the wide French doors that led to a private balcony overlooking the Atlantic. The ocean breeze blew her hat toward the bed.

  That impish grin made an appearance again. “It has the best view.”

  She brushed her hair from her face as we stepped out onto the deck, easily fifty feet in the air. She didn’t look down, only rested her hands on the polished wood of the banister and looked out at the waves. “It’s beautiful here.”

  “Yeah. Beautiful,” I said, my eyes locked to the delicate lines of her face.

  Sam caught me staring and smiled, then trailed her fingers along the railing as she closed the distance between us. My hands cradled her head, and I brought my lips to hers, kissing her gently, trying to show her without words how much it meant to me that she was here. I struggled to keep myself in check. With Sam, one taste was never enough.

  Our lips lingered a breath apart until she made the next move, grabbing fistfuls of my shirt and arching up on her tiptoes. Her curves crashed against me, and I took her mouth without hesitation, sweeping inside to taste her. She rubbed her tongue along mine. Damn. She felt so right in my arms.

  Her whimper frayed what little restraint I had left, and the kiss spiraled as I sank deeper into her, losing myself along the way. I let g
o of her face, only to slide my hands up the backs of her thighs. Her skin was hot and softer than silk. “Samantha,” I whispered against her mouth.

  “Touch me,” she pleaded. “Just…touch me, Grayson.”

  We were crossing the line, and I couldn’t bring myself to give a fuck. I let her thighs slide through my hands until I palmed the perfect globes of her ass—holy shit—by her bare skin. My thumbs grazed upward, feeling the tiny, easily breakable straps of her thong, and I groaned as I lifted her higher against me so she could feel my raging hard-on against her stomach. She brushed her palms along my cheeks, trusting me to carry her full weight, and kissed me with abandon.

  I lost my common sense to the feel of her under my hands, the sweet slide of her tongue with mine, the press of her breasts against my chest as she arched to get even closer. Blood pounded in my ears, keeping rhythm with the crashing waves beneath us. She wound one hand around the back of my neck, licked along my lips, and I sucked her tongue into my mouth. She stroked the roof of my mouth and ran the sensitive ridge behind my teeth. Fuck. Just like that.

  Her sweet little moan snapped the last of my control. I pivoted her slight weight into a bridal carry and made my way to her bed, laying her in the center without so much as breaking our kiss.

  Careful to keep my weight on my elbows, I licked and sucked my way down her neck, inhaling the scent of vanilla that was becoming home to me. I pressed my lips along her collarbone and nudged the spaghetti straps of her sundress down her arms.

  My eyes locked onto hers as I pulled her dress down, looking for the slightest hint that she didn’t want this. Instead, she arched her back to make it easier and exposed the nude lace of her strapless bra. “Please?”

  Damn. This gorgeous, brilliant woman was actually asking me to put my hands on her. My mouth watered as I tugged her bra down just enough for her breasts to spring free, and my breath caught. Everything about her, from her pebbled nipples to the way she filled my hands was perfect.

  Her gasp filled the silence as I swirled my tongue around one nipple, her nails biting into my scalp as she held me to her. Make her do that again. Now. I switched breasts and repeated the treatment, savoring her reaction. “Oh my God, that feels incredible,” she whispered.

  “You’re incredible,” I told her, blowing lightly across her wet skin. She jumped and I immediately warmed her again with my mouth. Her legs parted, and she brought her knees up, settling me right…fucking…there.

  Damn. A couple tugs of fabric and I could be inside her. Just the thought had me painfully hard. I thrust my hips against her once, matching with a pull at her breast and she moaned. “Again.”

  Yes, ma’am. This time the moan was torn from my throat. I felt her heat through my board shorts and counted to ten to keep control as I thrust against her in a gentle rhythm.

  Then my thoughts ceased as she pulled me into her kiss. Nothing existed in the world outside Samantha and my craving to be absolutely everything she needed. One of her hands took mine and placed it on her thigh, then slid it up under her dress.

  My fingers grazed the lacy scrap of underwear. “Fuck, I can feel how wet you are.”

  “I want you,” she said without embarrassment.

  I plunged my tongue into her welcoming mouth, as I slipped my finger under the lace just grazing—

  “Hey, you two! We’re going to be late!” Jagger’s voice echoed up the stairs through the open door.

  “Damn it. Fucking Jagger. Fucking family dinner.” The only thing I fucking wanted was already under me.

  I rested my forehead against hers and tried to calm my breathing, but she was looking up at me, those green eyes hazed with lust, and then she had the nerve to giggle.

  “What’s so funny?”

  “I’ve never heard you swear so much. Ever.” She grinned, like our little predicament was funny, so I slowly slid my fingers from underneath her panties, catching her gasp as her giggle died. “Grayson,” she whispered as she closed her eyes.

  “Screw staying with my parents. I say we stay here. In this bed. The whole weekend.” The pillow collapsed under the weight of my arms as I caged her in.

  “And tell your mother that you missed your family dinner because…”

  Well, if that didn’t kill my hard-on. “Right. My mother.”

  “Grayson? Sam? Jagger says we need to get going,” Paisley called up. “I am most certainly not saying that, Jagger Bateman,” she hissed.

  “Put your dick back in your pants and let’s go!” Jagger yelled. “I’m starving.”

  Sam snorted, and I rolled my eyes. “I wish my dick had made it out of my pants,” I mumbled. Sam full-out laughed, and it was the sweetest sound I’d heard. “You drive me insane, Samantha.”

  “Well, I hardly think your mom should meet my girls.” She dropped her eyes to her beautiful breasts, still bare. And if I gazed there much longer…we wouldn’t be leaving. “So maybe we should put them away?”

  “If you insist.” My tongue ran across my lower lip, still tasting her.

  “I fucking insist! Let’s go!” Jagger sounded closer this time.

  I rolled to the side, blocking her from view in case he decided to come in, while she tucked herself away and pulled the straps to her sundress back up.

  “Shall we?” I stood and held out my hand.

  “We shall.” She put her hand in mine, and I walked her into the lion’s den.

  “Why don’t you stay with us?” Paisley asked me as I carried my bag out of the back of the Yukon Jagger rented. My parents hadn’t come out of the house and ambushed my friends, so we had a chance at this not being a total disaster.

  “You guys are a little tight on bedroom space,” I answered, looking at my parents’ much smaller house and thinking the same thing about theirs.

  Morgan, Paisley’s best friend, raked her hand over her dark brown hair. “Are you sure I’m not intruding?”

  “You’re never an intrusion, Morgan, and we’re happy to have you along. Carter, on the other hand…” I raised my eyebrows.

  “Fuck off,” he answered, climbing out of the backseat.

  “He like…teases people now?” Morgan whispered to Paisley.

  “Who said I was teasing?” I kept my face as still as possible, and Morgan glanced between me and Will, no doubt trying to figure out if I was kidding this time.

  Yes, and no.

  Sam wound her arms around my back, immediately calming my introduce-her-to-my-parents nerves. “You can always sleep next to me.”

  I pulled her under my shoulder and kissed her forehead. “I will take that under consideration.” Yeah, only after we decided on having sex. There was no way I’d be able to keep my hands off her fuckable little body if she slept next to me. I was already perma-hard whenever I smelled her, let alone touched her.

  “Gray!” Mia bounded out of the house and skipped down the long staircase and didn’t stop until she had her arms around my neck. “We need to talk,” she whispered in my ear.

  I nodded, setting her down. “Okay. Morgan, this is my baby sister, Mia. Carter, stay the hell away.”

  He rolled his eyes at me while Mia hugged Sam. “I’m so glad you’re here!”

  “Me, too, and the house is gorgeous!”

  “Dad built it when Connie was born,” Mia explained, as I started to lead them up the steps that would take us to the first level. Everything was stilted to accommodate the times the island was more water than land. “Gray, I seriously need to talk to you,” she said, coming up next to me.

  “Right now?” I asked as we made it to the porch. She tugged on my sleeve.

  “Before you get—”

  “Grayson!” Mom came through the sliding glass door and hugged me, her dark curls coming to just beneath my shoulders.

  “Hey, Mom.”

  She turned my face left and right, inspecting for damage as usual. “Well, you’re no worse for wear. Your father is closing the shop, but he’ll be here soon. Introduce me to your friends.”


  Sam stepped onto the porch, and my heart swelled like a damn girl. I guess I appreciated what I had, too. She hung back, worrying her lip between her teeth.

  I pointed to each of them in turn. “This is Carter, Morgan, Jagger, and Paisley.” Then I held out my hand and raised an eyebrow at Sam. Take the challenge, Sam.

  She swallowed, straightened her shoulders, and raised her chin enough to remind me she’d been raised in social circles a hell of a lot higher than mine. Then she smiled and took my hand. I reeled her in until she was securely tucked beneath my arm. “And, Mom, this is my Samantha.”

  Sam’s wide eyes flew to mine at the same time Mom’s assessed her quickly and smiled. “I’m so happy to meet you, Samantha.” She pulled Sam into a hug and held it until Sam visibly relaxed, and then she let her go. “We’re so glad you’re here.”

  Sam tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and gave a shy smile that told me she was still on her toes. “Oh, you can call me Sam, and I’m thrilled he asked.” Then she turned that smile on me, and it became genuine.

  “Well, now that we’re all acquainted, let’s get inside. Supper is about ready.” Mom ushered the crowd in.

  “Gray, now?” Mia asked, her eyebrows furrowed.

  “Mia, what’s wrong?”

  “Mia, get inside and help your sisters.” Mom ordered in the I-said-now voice.

  “Yes, ma’am,” she mumbled, but did as she was told.

  “Whoa,” Sam whispered as we entered the living room. It was vaulted to the third floor and boasted huge canvases of Dad’s boats in full sail. “You built these?”

  “Not all.” I pointed to the one furthest left. “That was before me, but the one over here is the one we built my junior year in high school.”

  “That’s amazing,” Paisley remarked.

  “What the hell are you doing flying helicopters?” Jagger asked. “These are seriously badass.”

  I cringed, and checked to make sure Mom hadn’t heard. She’d already found her way to the kitchen. “Can we keep the helicopter stuff a little more quiet?”

  I got what-the-hell looks tossed my way, but they didn’t have time to ask before Mom came back over. “We’re all set up out back.”