by Anna Antonia
I didn’t ask out of vanity. I wanted to understand him. He deserved a better version of me even though I didn’t deserve him at all.
“What do you mean why? Because I like you, love. A lot.” He scowled at me. “Now don’t give me that look. Why else am I baring my heart to the woman who turned down an opportunity to work at Axis 3? Do you know how many applications HR gets a day?”
Only a reminder of my lack of appreciation would be sweet coming from Gavin.
I stood up and leaned across my desk.
“Thank you so much, Gavin. For everything.” I brushed my lips softly against his.
“Remind me again why you’re thanking me,” he commanded softly.
I pressed my lips against his harder. “For being so kind.”
“Mmm, what else?”
His growl did wicked things to me. “For being such a great kisser.”
“Am I?” Gavin put his hand on the back of my head and pulled me closer. “Come here.”
Desire turned to flame as it always did. Neither of us cared who might pass by.
Gavin’s tongue parted my lips and slipped through to caress my mouth. I moaned softly as he deepened the kiss. Closing my eyes, I let the carnal emotions tumble right over me.
He cared about our relationship, ephemeral as it may have ended up being. Gavin was the first person in my life that cared about me without expecting anything in return.
Even I knew how precious that was.
His feelings gave me wings. I wanted to soar.
Suddenly, my phone played Bach’s “Fantasia and Fugue”.
I jerked back, throat gasping. Not for air but from terror.
My father was calling.
THIRTY-FIVE
“What’s wrong, Paige?”
Just moments ago my mouth tasted of peppermints and Gavin. But now it didn’t taste of sweetness.
It tasted of fear.
Somehow I managed to get my frozen muscles to move. Reaching down, I dismissed the call and muted the phone. I’d deal with the consequences later. Right now was more important.
“It’s nothing. The noise startled me. That’s all.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah.”
He eyed the cell. “You’re not going to get it?”
“No. It’s probably a wrong number.”
Gavin frowned. “That’s not your ring tone for wrong numbers.”
Fuck! My father rattled me so damned much. I needed to get my head on straight.
“You’re right. I’ll check it later. Now I just want to finish lunch with my very important person.”
Gavin shrugged. “If you’re sure it’s no big deal I’d like to finish the kissing part.”
“Me too.”
A knock sounded at the door. It was one of the sales guys. “Hi, Gavin. Sorry to interrupt. Jerry needs you for a call.”
“Be right there.” Gavin waited until he left before wiping his mouth and standing up. “Excuse me, love, but duty calls.”
“It’s no problem. Thanks for the delicious lunch.”
He leaned down and kissed me quickly. “You can thank me later tonight.”
My heartbeat ran like a rabbit. I wished I could say it was solely because of the feel of Gavin’s lips on mine.
“You can count on it.”
I kept my smile long after he strode out of the room. Reluctantly, my gaze shifted over to my phone. We’d both heard the buzzing as another call came through again.
And again.
My father wasn’t going to appreciate having to wait for me. He didn’t give a damn what I was in the middle of—work, traffic, a fire—I did not keep Patrick Brookstone waiting.
Get ready to get blasted.
I didn’t want to take a chance of being overheard in my office. I needed to find someplace relatively private.
Walking out of my office, I passed numerous people. I gave them a friendly nod, telling the closest ones I was stepping out for a few minutes just in case Gavin came back before I did.
I took the elevator down to the floor beneath Axis 3. There was a vestibule tucked off in a little corner. Nobody really passed by. I’d have enough privacy to make what would, hopefully, be a quick phone call.
My father picked up on the second ring.
“Took your time, didn’t you?”
Just the sound of his voice caused my back to stiffen with a familiar but toxic mixture of fear, guilt, and disappointment.
“I called you as soon as I could.”
He grunted. “You need to come out.”
“Why?”
“What do you mean why? Because I said so.”
I never verbally called him Dad, Daddy, or Patrick. At least, I hadn’t since I’d moved out that final time.
It should’ve went without saying I couldn’t be expected to leave my job without a reason to give to my employer. When did my father give a shit? He wanted me home and he didn’t give a flying fuck what it did to the rest of my life.
He never gave a shit because I wasn’t real to him.
“It something wrong with Melissa?”
“Yes. She misses you.”
Of course.
Patrick wouldn’t want me home because he missed me. I knew he was glad I wasn’t under his feet anymore as a constant reminder of his spite towards the woman he loved more than life itself.
Never mind how abusive his love often was.
My father didn’t give a damn what I did as long as I didn’t embarrass him. Or interfere in his life with Melissa. Or expect anything out of him other than money.
I always wondered why my stepmother didn’t resent me considering the circumstances of my birth. Now that I was older I understood the answer. I was a stand-in for the child she yearned for. And after getting to know Gavin, I was a poor substitute indeed.
If either of them had any suspicion that I was currently involved with Gavin…
“Can I come down this weekend?”
“No. You need to come down now.”
“I need time—”
“Make it happen by six, Paige, or else.”
Gritting my teeth, I knew exactly what the “or else” was. Patrick let me go to New York but he never let me forget I was under this thumb. The apartment he provided me wasn’t because of warm, tender feelings towards his only child.
No.
I wasn’t allowed to have my own place because then he wouldn’t have control. If I’d gotten something anyways it wouldn’t have been seen as an act of independence.
It would’ve been seen as an act of war.
He’d crush me within a day. He’d get me fired from my job and then cut off any access points to land anywhere else. If I persisted on defying him, Patrick would turn the screws until I begged forgiveness.
I didn’t want to find out how much I’d have to suffer before he relented. If I hadn’t already made it clear by now then here it was—I was terrified of my father.
Utterly terrified.
I didn’t see a future where I’d feel anything but terror.
“I understand.”
“Good. You know where to go.”
“Yes.”
“Call me when you’re on board.”
“I will.”
The phone clicked off. I let out a long, shaky breath. Exhausted just from a call lasting less than minute, I dreaded what spending a couple of days in his presence would do to me.
I’d have to deal with that later. I had a bigger pressing issue right now.
What the hell was I going to say to Gavin?
Angrily, I gritted my teeth. I didn’t want to leave him. Not yet. These were my last two days working with Gavin, never to be repeated. I wasn’t surprised Patrick Brookstone yet again found a way to rob me of joy. He had a preternatural instinct for it.
To him, my happiness mattered for nothing. No wonder I had to steal every bit I could like a thief.
Well, there was nothing for it but to tell Gavin I wasn’t going to be able to f
inish out my assignment. I hated having to do it, but the alternative was much worse.
Turning around, I immediately took a hasty step back.
Gavin stood just a few feet away.
THIRTY-SIX
“You scared me!” I said with a nervous laugh. “Did you need something?”
He didn’t return my smile. Instead, Gavin stared at me with unnerving intensity.
“Who were you talking to?”
“Just a…why do you ask?”
Diversion. Finding out exactly what he heard mattered more than risking his suspicion.
And Gavin was most definitely suspicious.
“The person who called you earlier? The one you didn’t want to talk to in front of me?”
Damn. Double-damn.
I wouldn’t have assumed Gavin was jealous but it was hard not to think it when he asked in that particular way.
“Yes and no. Yes, it was the same person, but no, I didn’t answer because I didn’t want it to interrupt my lunch with you.”
“Why did you come down here to make your call?”
“Because I didn’t want to be seen taking a personal call.” Flimsy excuse at best.
“Who was it, Paige?”
“My father.” Fuck me but I didn’t want to tell him that. I rushed and said, “I’m sorry to do this but I have to leave.”
“For the day?”
“For the next day or so.”
Gavin’s brows snapped together in a hard frown. “Paige, I need you here.”
“I know. I’m really sorry.”
“I can’t allow that time off. You still have two days left.”
I hated this so much. I wished I had the courage to tell my father to go to hell. If so, then Gavin wouldn’t be looking at me with such suspicion and wariness.
“I understand, but I’m afraid I can’t stay. This is an emergency.”
“What kind? Family? That’s why your father called?”
“Family and yes.”
Please don’t pry. Please don’t pry.
“What’s wrong?”
The best lies were those wrapped in truth. I hated that I’d see how well it worked with Gavin.
“It’s my stepmother. She’s really not…she isn’t exactly healthy and wants me to come down.”
Gavin’s frown dropped away along with his suspicion. He put his hand on my shoulder. “I’m sorry to hear that, love. Is she sick?”
I could tell by his tone he didn’t mean sick in a common cold kind of way but rather something more serious.
“You could say that. It’s complicated.”
The sweet and kind man I manipulated followed my lead.
“I get it. You should go. I can handle things here.”
“Thank you.”
I’d make it up to him. I’d shower him with so much attention and devotion when I got back he’d get sick of me.
Gavin cupped my cheek. His eyes darkened with concern. “Is there something you’re not telling me, Paige?”
My stomach felt like it plopped out of my body and skidded away. Something must’ve shown in my face. Lightheaded, I licked my lips.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re so pale.”
“Oh.” I smiled weakly. “I’m just worried about going home. I just hope everything turns out okay.”
“It will.”
If only I could be as confident as him.
I could pretend. I could do anything as long as it meant Gavin didn’t find out my ugly truth.
Nuzzling his palm with my cheek, I said, “I’m sure it will—but only because you said so.”
“Do you think you can be back by Friday?”
“I’ll try.”
“Good. The staff is throwing you a party. I’d hate for you to miss it.”
How nice! I didn’t expect it considering I was just a temp.
“Was it supposed to be a surprise?”
“Yes.”
“You shouldn’t have told me that then.”
Gavin leaned in close until his forehead bumped mine. “I told you to make sure you come back.”
I guess he wasn’t above laying down his own lead. At least he was honest enough about it.
“I’ll do everything I can to be here. I swear.”
“All right. Can you finish out the day or do you need to go now?”
I didn’t want to leave ever. I wanted to push it off as much as possible. But if I had any chance of getting back by Friday then it was best if I left immediately.
“Honestly, now would work better. I really want to be back as soon as I can, Gavin. I hope you know that.”
He pulled me in for a hard hug. I wrapped my arms around his waist and squeezed back.
“Since we’re confessing things I want you to know I’m going to miss you, Paige. Seeing you is the favorite part of my day.”
“Me too. I’m going to miss you so much.”
“Aww, you sound so sad.” Gavin leaned far enough away to kiss my forehead. “It’s okay, love. Family is important. You need to be there for your stepmom.”
“You’re such a nice man.”
“Nice? That sounds boring.”
I shook my head vehemently. “It’s anything but. I love you being nice. I wouldn’t change a thing about you, Gavin. Honest.”
“Paige, you don’t have to butter me up,” he grumbled. “I said you could go.”
He didn’t understand but that was okay.
“Thank you for this, Gavin. Really.”
“Think nothing of it. You’re going to California, right?”
“Yes.”
Gavin paused and then cleared his throat. “You can use my plane. If you want.”
I was falling way too fast for him because he was so kind to me. I didn’t want to get attached to this wonderful man, but it was getting harder each minute I spent with him. Especially when he did things like this.
“Thank you, but my ticket is already booked.”
“Ah, I see. Maybe then on the way back?”
I’d much rather fly in his plane than my father’s. It wasn’t going to happen because it’d raise too many questions.
“Maybe.”
“So that’s a no. You’re a frustrating little thing, aren’t you? One day you’re going to let me take care of you.”
Gavin hugged me again before letting go. I missed him already and barely resisted the urge to tug him to me again.
“I’m glad we at least got some lunch together.”
“Me too. I guess you should get going, love, so you can hurry back to me.”
“I should.” I really didn’t want to. I wanted to stop time so I could just stay here with Gavin.
“Call me when you get to California.”
“Okay.”
“Be safe.”
“I will.”
We looked at each other, clearly not wanting to be the first to leave. Abruptly, Gavin admitted, “I suck at saying goodbye, Paige. I’m going to walk away now, okay?”
“Sure.”
He kissed me quickly and then turned around. His fast clip echoed until I heard the stairwell door clang shut.
My smile died as soon as that happened. I’d lied on some level to everyone I ever met. It didn’t bother me that much until Gavin. This was yet another time I really wished I could be honest.
If so I’d tell him everything.
I’d tell him about how I didn’t mean for this to go so far. I’d tell him that I really just wanted him as a friend and made the rookie mistake of wanting more. I’d tell him I’d never been happier than I’d been these last weeks.
I’d ask Gavin to protect me and help me get out from beneath my father’s thumb.
No. This is my burden, never to be shared with anyone else.
There were very few things I held sacred in life and that promise was one of them. My family problems were mine. No one else’s.
Okay. I knew what came next. I just needed to survive it and then I’d be free to win
g my way back to Gavin.
For however long I still had him.
THIRTY-SEVEN
I really should’ve been exhausted by the time I landed in Maui. I’d had too-little sleep the night before and then there was jetlag. But truthfully, I was too wound up to be tired. I just wanted to get back to Gavin and my life in New York.
When I called he didn’t pick up so I left him a message. I was disappointed because just the sound of his voice would’ve given me more than enough strength to get through this.
As always, my father sent a car to pick me up at the airport. The hour drive to Lahaina went by in a blur. Before I knew it, we pulled through the community gates and then I was at my father’s seven acre oceanfront palatial spread.
Normal people would’ve said “I’m home!” as soon as they walked through the door.
I didn’t. One reason being that I didn’t get to walk through the door. I had to ring the doorbell like any stranger off the street would.
A maid I didn’t recognize opened the towering glass and wood portal. “Good evening, Miss Brookstone. Welcome home. Your father is waiting for you in the den.”
Even though it was late, I wasn’t surprised by the answer. My father wouldn’t care that I’d been flying for over twelve hours. Nor would he care that I’d been up since six in the morning. Nor would he have made sure I’d eaten.
His needs, and by extension Melissa’s, always came first.
I smiled at the middle-aged woman, hoping she’d be leaving soon. Although one would think I’d become immune to Patrick Brookstone’s volatile displays of temper, I didn’t want any witnesses to see how little he thought of me.
Stepping inside, I slipped off my shoes by the foyer. The maid picked them up and headed up the stairs, presumably to drop them off in my room.
As much as I would’ve liked to dawdle, I made my way across the highly-polished stone floors towards the den. Switching to tunnel vision, I didn’t pay attention to the details of how much things had changed on the main floor.
Change was inevitable here in my father’s 11,000 square feet of luxury. His and Melissa’s blistering fights necessitated new objets d’art as well as furniture.
I walked into the airy den to find Patrick dressed in his usual outfit of cargo shorts and lightweight shirt, unbuttoned to show off his deeply tanned, washboard stomach.
