Finding Junie Kim

by Ellen Oh

  A loud blast shook the ground beneath their feet.

  “Children, you cannot go to Seoul now! It is too dangerous,” the grandfather said.

  “But our parents . . .”

  “For now, we must all leave Incheon. The Americans are bombing us!”

  Not knowing what else to do, Jinjoo hurriedly retied Junha to her back, and the children followed the elderly couple. The roads out of the city were filled with people walking with their hastily packed belongings. Several hours later, they were out of the city walking on dirt roads with thousands of other people. Eunjoo was now holding a sleeping Junha, while Jinjoo carried a tired Junsoo. But Jinjoo’s arms and legs were sore, and she didn’t know how much longer she could continue. As if recognizing their exhaustion, the grandfather announced that they would take a break. They pulled their little group over and found a grassy field by the side of the road. So tired was Eunjoo that she lay down sideways and fell asleep, Junha still pressed to her back.

  Jinjoo sat down and cradled Junsoo in her lap.

  The old couple sat next to her; the grandfather fanned himself and his wife. He pulled a gourd of water out of his sack and offered it to his wife before drinking some. Smiling at Jinjoo, they offered her some water. Grateful, Jinjoo took a tiny sip. It made her even more thirsty, but she didn’t want to drink any more of their limited supply.

  “No, no, drink some more and give some to your brothers and sister,” the kind grandfather said. “There’s a well not too far from here that I know of. We can refill it on the way. But if you don’t drink enough water you will all get sick in this heat.”

  Thanking them, Jinjoo shook her siblings awake and made them drink all the water. After a few more minutes, the grandfather announced that it was time to keep walking.

  “Where are you going, Harabeoji?” Jinjoo asked.

  The grandfather pulled Junsoo from Jinjoo’s arms to carry him for her. “We are going to Suwon,” he answered.

  “Our gomo is in Suwon,” she said. “Do you have family there?”

  “Our son is there with his family. He’s been waiting for us to join him so we can all go to Busan together, but we didn’t want to leave our store.”

  “You didn’t want to leave the store,” the grandmother cut in. “I wanted to leave long ago! Before the North Koreans arrived!”

  The grandfather nodded ruefully. “I was prideful. My garment store had been in my family for several generations. I didn’t want to give it up.”

  “So what? It’s just a building! You can always start another one. But family is irreplaceable,” the grandmother said.

  “Oh, my father had a watch store in the business district,” Jinjoo said. “I don’t know what’s happened to it now.”

  “Watch store? Are you Lee Changwoo’s children?”

  Jinjoo nodded in surprise. “Do you know my father?”

  “Of course,” the grandfather said. “He is one of the most honest business owners I know. Terrible thing about your gomo. I was so sorry to hear that. I understand he was taking her to Suwon, and that’s the last thing I heard. What happened?”

  Taking a deep breath, Jinjoo explained all that had occurred since her father had left town and what her mother had learned.

  “So that’s why you wanted to go to Seoul,” the grandfather said. “But it is definitely too dangerous. I think we should take you to your gomo. Your father will most likely head there also. It is the safest place for all of you.”

  Jinjoo bit her lip as she looked at her sister. Seeing how tired her sister was, she took Junha to give Eunjoo a rest. She thought of what the grandmother had just said. That family was irreplaceable. A fierce rush of love and affection filled Jinjoo. She would protect her family, and she would find their parents, no matter how hard it was. She would find them.

  Junie

  “Why did the Americans bomb you?” Junie asks.

  “The American ships bombed Incheon so they could land their troops.”

  “Oh, I see, because the North Koreans had taken over.”

  Grandma nods.

  “How far is Suwon and Seoul from Incheon?”

  “Let’s see, why don’t you pull up a map of Korea on your computer?”

  Grandma points out where Incheon is on the west coast of South Korea. Seoul is to the east and slightly north of Incheon while Suwon is directly south of Seoul.

  “Wow, Suwon was much farther,” I say. “Why did you walk there when you needed to go to Seoul?”

  “Because it was safer,” she replies simply.

  IT TOOK THREE DAYS TO reach Suwon at the slow pace they walked. The elderly couple had shared their food and water supplies with the children, and Jinjoo had in turn given them some of their rice balls. But once in Suwon, the streets were chaotic, with people in a panic.

  “I don’t know what’s going on here,” the grandfather said in alarm. “Let’s head to our son’s house.”

  They followed along, trying to keep out of the way of the fleeing people. Until they finally reached a quiet, well-lit street. Jinjoo could see that it was a wealthy area of the city. The grandfather put Junsoo down and knocked on the door to a large house compound. The door opened immediately. A young woman appeared and cried out in relief.

  “Abeonim! Eomeonim! Thank heavens you’ve arrived! There’s no time to lose! We must leave immediately!”

  “What’s happening? Why must we leave?”

  A man appeared and urged them inside.

  “There’s going to be another big battle here,” he said. “We barely survived the last one. We need to leave for Busan immediately. It’s the only safe place in Korea. I was fortunate to bribe a military driver to take us as far south as he can. But we have to leave now!”

  The grandfather looked to Jinjoo and her family. “We need to help them find their family.”

  The son stopped and blinked in astonishment at the children. Jinjoo could see his surprise turn to fear and anger. Before he could complain, she stepped forward and politely thanked the old couple.

  “Harabeoji, Halmoni, thank you so much for helping us,” she said. “We can find our gomo from here. We know the way.”

  The grandfather did not look like he believed her, but his son urged him to come inside and prepare, and he guiltily accepted their words.

  “Good luck, little ones,” he said.

  The grandmother pushed a sack of food into Jinjoo’s hands before quickly rushing after her son. Jinjoo and Eunjoo bowed and quickly walked away.

  “What do we do now?” Eunjoo asked. “We don’t know where Gomo is.”

  Jinjoo went to the end of the empty block and sat down in a grassy spot, hidden from the house. “Now we wait.”

  Not long after, a large military vehicle drove up to the gate and rapped on the door. Jinjoo watched as the son stepped out and handed the driver a large wad of cash. The driver then loaded the back of the car with all their belongings, while the grandfather and grandmother got in the car with the son and his wife. When everything was loaded up, the car drove away.

  “Wow, they must be really rich,” Jinjoo said out loud. Taking her little brother’s hand, she marched back to the now-empty house.

  “Jinjoo, what are you doing?” Eunjoo asked.

  “We need a safe place to stay tonight.” Jinjoo unlatched the door that had been left unlocked and entered the house compound.

  “Are you sure this is all right to do?” Eunjoo asked with wide, frightened eyes.

  “They left already,” Jinjoo said. “And they’re not coming back.” She locked the gate door after them and went inside the house.

  Turning on the electric lights, Jinjoo immediately searched for food in the kitchen. She found seaweed and small dried anchovies and a basket of fruits and vegetables. Combined with the food the grandmother had given them, they had enough for a full meal. They ate ravenously, enjoying every bite until they were almost uncomfortably full. Jinjoo groaned with pleasure. It was the first time she’d ever seen her sister
eat so much.

  After they ate, they washed up in the sink outside the house in the warmth of the summer night. Eunjoo decided to wash all their clothing, so they raided the closets for large T-shirts that they wore while they washed everything. The little boys were happy to go naked during the wash. When they were done, they hung the wash on the clothesline and went inside.

  Jinjoo found the main bedroom and opened the closet. She pulled out thick bed padding and blankets and spread it all out on the floor for their bed. She turned off the lights, and the children settled down to sleep. The little boys fell asleep right away, but Jinjoo and her sister stayed up late listening to the sounds of the night all around them.

  “Jinjoo, what do we do tomorrow?” Eunjoo asked.

  “We try to find Gomo.”

  “But what happens if we can’t find her?”

  “I don’t know,” Jinjoo whispered.

  They were both quiet for a long moment. Jinjoo was starting to panic at the idea of not finding their gomo when Eunjoo spoke again.

  “It’s okay, Jinjoo,” her sister replied in a sleepy voice. “We’ll figure it out.”

  A few minutes later, her sister’s soft snores made Jinjoo realize that Eunjoo was relaxed for the first time since they’d last seen their parents. Her sister, who worried about everything and had barely slept for days, was finally fast asleep.

  In the morning, they set out to the main road to seek help. But no matter who they asked, no one knew who their gomo was, or her daughter. After several hours, they returned to the house they were staying at.

  Jinjoo was tired and frustrated. She lay down in the main bedroom to try to figure out what to do. After a while the smell of food roused her, and she hurried out into the courtyard. There she found her brothers chasing each other while her sister was standing in front of a large grill. On top of it sat a small pot of rice, another of soup, and a kettle of barley tea.

  “How did you do this?” Jinjoo asked in amazement.

  “Eomma taught me how to use the yeontan,” she said as she pointed to the cylindrical coal briquettes piled up against the outside of the house. “Shinae never did a good job, so I learned how.”

  “But where did you find all this food?” Jinjoo asked. “I didn’t see it.”

  “They have an icebox in the kitchen that you missed,” Eunjoo said. “I also found kimchee!”

  Soon, the meal was ready. Eunjoo didn’t know how to make a lot of food, but she had learned to make rice and seaweed soup. Because there was no meat, she’d used a tin of tuna. While the soup wasn’t as good as their mother’s, and the rice was scorched on the bottom and a little too dry, it was all incredibly delicious to the hungry children. And when eaten with kimchee, it was perfect.

  After dinner, they made sure all the coals were burned out before they washed up and went to sleep.

  In bed, they waited for their brothers to fall asleep. Then the sisters began to talk about what to do.

  “Should we stay here for a while?” Eunjoo asked. “We have food and a place to sleep.”

  “No, we have to find Abeoji,” Jinjoo said.

  “And Eomma, too,” Eunjoo replied.

  “She will be wherever Abeoji is.”

  “How do we find them?” Eunjoo asked.

  “We should go to Seoul.” It was the one thing Jinjoo was certain about. “If we stay here, we may never see them again, but if we head to Seoul, we can still find them.”

  Her older sister sat chewing her lip, a clear sign she was worrying again. Jinjoo could almost hear her thoughts. Walking to Seoul could take days with two little boys. What would they eat? Where would they sleep? Shouldn’t they stay here where it was safe?

  “Eonni,” Jinjoo said. “The owners of this house left because it was not safe for them. Then it is not safe for us. We need our parents.”

  Eunjoo agreed. “Are you sure we will be able to find them?”

  “Yes, I’m sure,” Jinjoo said confidently.

  They were quiet as they listened to the snoring of their little brothers. Soon Jinjoo heard the soft breathing of her older sister too. As she listened to their sleep sounds, Jinjoo let her worries subside and let the cadence of their breathing lull her to sleep.

  In the morning, Eunjoo heated the barley tea and poured it into bowls of yesterday’s cold rice and served it with roasted seaweed, sautéed anchovies, and kimchee.

  After they finished, they cleaned the house, emptied the coal ash, and washed everything they had used before leaving. Even if the original family didn’t return, they wanted to leave it cleaner than when they’d arrived. This was their way of thanking them.

  At the main road, the crowds that had been there in the previous days had died down. They asked a random passerby for the direction to Seoul and were pointed toward the main highway. Having asked the grandfather the distances between Suwon and Seoul and Incheon, Jinjoo knew that it would probably take them three to four days to reach Seoul. Not because it was so far—the distance was about the same, thirty-five kilometers—but because she knew the boys would slow them down.

  The road to Seoul was not crowded with people or vehicles. They were able to walk on the side of the road unbothered by others. When they were tired, they let Junha and Junsoo run ahead for a little while. Junha in particular was pleased to be free and run around on his own two feet. They just needed to point him in the right direction. When the boys grew tired, the girls carried them on their backs until they could no longer take another step.

  At midday, the children stopped when they caught sight of farmhouses a small distance from the main road. Too thirsty to continue, they went to the nearest farmhouse to ask for water. Inside, it was completely empty. It seemed to have been abandoned for a while. In front of the house, there was an iron water pump. Jinjoo looked in the house and found a bucket. She pumped vigorously until water started pouring out of the faucet. She rinsed out the bucket before filling it again. The water was cold and only slightly metallic. They drank the water and ate their packed lunches and rested for an hour. Using the water to clean off as well as cool down, they sat in a grassy area to relax. But Jinjoo couldn’t rest and began searching through the entire house.

  “Jinjoo, what are you doing?”

  She ignored her sister and looked in every corner of the house until she finally found a wooden bottle. She ran to the pump and rinsed the bottle until it smelled clean and then filled it with water. Not having a stopper, she used part of a clean cloth to plug the bottle.

  “Now we’re ready!” Jinjoo said.

  Junie

  Grandma pauses and clears her throat. I race to the kitchen to get more boricha. Grandma thanks me, then continues her story.

  IT WAS HARD FOR JINJOO to know just how far they’d come. The road seemed endless and the few people they saw would not stop to speak to them. And because the sisters were either carrying the boys or letting them walk, their pace was slow. When Junsoo wasn’t trying to run the wrong way and eat anything that he could catch, Junha would throw a massive tantrum. It was impossible to pick Junha up when he was that upset. He would do the stiff-arm, back-arch trick that was guaranteed to make whoever was trying to pick him up fall over also. At that point, there was nothing to do but let him cry it out.

  Jinjoo worried that if they didn’t hurry, they would miss the opportunity to see their parents. It was a concern that she felt deep inside, a gnawing feeling that she couldn’t explain but couldn’t help but believe. All she could do was urge her siblings to walk faster.

  By nightfall, the little family found themselves still on the open road. Seeing haystacks in a nearby field, Jinjoo suggested they sleep hidden behind them for the night. They ate the last of their packed food, and Eunjoo sang songs to their grumpy brothers.

  Mountain bunny, bunny-ya

  Where are you going?

  Bouncing, bouncing as you’re running.

  Where are you going?

  Jinjoo sang along, using her fingers to make bunny ears. He
r brothers chortled in happy laughter.

  “Noona,” Junsoo said, pointing to Jinjoo. “You sound like an old frog when you sing!”

  Junha screamed, “Frog,” and bounced up and down.

  Jinjoo pulled a sour face and punched the hay to make it comfortable. Everyone always made fun of her singing. Even her father had told Jinjoo that it was a good thing she had a pretty face and smart brain, because her singing would drive any potential husbands away. It had hurt her feelings, and she’d sulked for days. Though no one liked to hear her sing, she enjoyed it anyway.

  She watched as Eunjoo played with their brothers and then got them ready to sleep, covering them both with the podaegi. Eunjoo kept singing and patting her brothers. They fell asleep instantly.

  It struck Jinjoo that her sister was more like a mother than their mother. But right after she thought it, she felt guilty. Jinjoo stared up at the starlit sky, wondering where their parents might be.

  In the quiet of the summer night, she could hear her sister praying. Although their mother was Buddhist, their father was Catholic, and they’d gone with him to a few services at Dapdong Catholic Cathedral. It was a beautiful building with its three-bell tower and western construction. It felt holy. It felt like a place you could pray to the heavens and be heard. Eunjoo loved the church and wanted to go every week, but their mother disapproved. To be honest, Jinjoo’s interest in the church only grew in defiance of their mother. But at times like this she wished she could be at the church, sending her prayers to heaven in hopes that someone would hear her.

  “Do you really think we will see our parents again?” Eunjoo asked.

  Jinjoo swallowed back her fears and focused only on the belief in her heart. “Yes,” Jinjoo replied.

  “How do you know?” Eunjoo asked.

  “I just know.” Before her sister could ask any more questions, Jinjoo turned away onto her side and tried to sleep.

  Jinjoo woke up to the laughter of her brothers. They were running around the haystack, chasing a white butterfly. As she watched them play, she heard the rumbling of approaching vehicles. Before she could stop them, her brothers raced to the side of the road to see what was making such a commotion. Jinjoo caught them just as the first American trucks rolled up. The large vehicles weren’t driving very fast, and the children could see the faces of the American soldiers sitting in the backs of the trucks in their green uniforms and hard helmets, holding their rifles. Some of the soldiers waved and smiled as they stood gaping at the procession.