Never Back Down

by Susan Harris

  Emily set down the shot in front of him, letting go a long sigh of annoyance as Ricky downed the shot without a second thought.

  “If Josie was here, she’d have kicked your ass out already.”

  Ricky snorted and grasped his neglected whisky and lifted it in a mock toast. “Then let’s be grateful it’s her night off, and you have the pleasure of my company.”

  His lips were numb, and he was pretty sure he was slurring his words, but he just didn’t care. He’d flushed the last few white rabbit tablets and was coming down real hard. His magic had begun to bubble inside him while arguing with Killian, willing him to burn his brother to ash. Only Melanie’s voice brought him back to himself.

  The last time Ricky had gone on a bender of this magnitude was right after he’d come home to find Sadie in bed with another man. Now, Sadie was dead, and he had to deal with trying to be a dad to Zach, who probably hated him.

  Slugging down another burn of whiskey, Ricky thought back to the last time he’d gone self-destructive. He’d been kicked out of bars that night too, ended up being tossed out of Josephine’s for picking a fight, because he wanted to hurt on the outside as much as he’d been hurting on the inside. Derek had appeared, hauled Ricky up off the ground, and as he swayed drunk, Derek looked at him sternly.

  Ricky dropped his head on the bar and closed his eyes, remembering.

  Ricky swung wildly at the idiot on the bar, his punch going wild considering he was three sheets to the wind and had the coordination of Bambi on ice. A punch to the gut sent him reeling, until security broke them apart. Things would have ended there if Ricky hadn’t decided to lash out at the security guy, earning him a free pass to getting his ass thrown out of the bar. They literally tossed him out, Ricky hitting the ground with a thud as he groaned before he laughed to himself like an idiot.

  Face pressed to the cold ground, Ricky groaned as he opened his eyes, his body screaming after the fifth fight of the night. Nausea rolled his stomach, the copious amount of alcohol he’d chugged coming back to bite him in the ass. A booted foot came into view as he rolled onto his back, cursing the throb in his head.

  “Dude, I’d move away if I was you. I’m about to upchuck all over your Timberlands.”

  Hearing the slur in his words, he was surprised that he’d been able to utter even an understandable syllable after gods knows how many beers, whiskey and shots.

  “You get sick on my shoes, mate, and you’re forking out for a new pair.”

  Ricky shaded his eyes and looked up at Derek, the werewolf staring down at him with an impenetrable mask. He held out his hand, and Ricky had no choice but to grasp it as Derek pulled him up, his hand on Ricky’s shoulder the only thing stopping him from listing over.

  “D! Let’s go inside and get another pint.”

  Derek frowned. “They only thing we are going to get is a coffee and something to eat.”

  Ricky backed away from his friend. “That doesn’t sound like fun at all.”

  “Neither will the bitch of a hangover you’re gonna have in the morning. Sarge is going to rip you a new one if you show up hungover again.”

  Too goddamn late for that… Ricky thought to himself as he stumbled away from Derek and sat down on the bench in the smoking area. Derek stepped up and sat down on the table itself, his legs resting on the seat. Ricky scrubbed a hand down his face.

  “I was supposed to get married today.”

  “I know.”

  That was all Derek replied, knowing full well that Ricky was freefalling. Today should have been the happiest day of his life, the day Sadie walked down the aisle and they became husband and wife. Instead Ricky stuck a for sale sign on their three-bedroom dream home and tried to find solace at the bottom of a bottle of Jack.

  “I want to strangle her. I want to shake her and ask her why she fucking did it. If she’d said she didn’t want to marry me, I probably could have deal with that. I want to rip her apart the fucking way she ripped me apart. I wish she was fucking dead, D.”

  He felt Derek’s hand on his shoulder, and the gesture was strangely comforting as if it anchored him to this world, instead of leaving him adrift like he’d felt for the last two weeks.

  “You don’t mean that, Ricky. I get you’re hurting right now, but just remember, there are two things in life you just can’t take back, words and bullets. So, make sure you mean what you say, and you hit what you aim for. It hurts now, and it’s gonna fucking hurt for a good while. But, you can’t continue down this path. I can’t bury another friend.”

  Coming out of his reminiscing, Ricky felt someone sit down beside him and lifted his head to see it was Derek. The wolf gave a nod to Emily, who immediately brought over two coffees. Derek thanked the Fae while Ricky pushed the coffee away and reached for the remains of his whiskey. Derek took the glass and flung it at the wall.

  “Goddamn it, Ricky. Don’t be an asshole. I don’t have time to coddle you, so I’m going to cut the bullshit and give it to you straight. You keep using drugs and drink to self-medicate, and not even I can protect you from what’s coming. You will lose the job you love. Melanie will see through those rose-tinted glasses and realize what a mess you are. Your mom won’t want to deal with a junkie for a son, and if social services gets wind of what the fuck you are up to, they will take your son from you.”

  “He’ll be better off without me.” The words slipped from Ricky’s lips, and the next thing he knew, Derek had him by the collar of his shirt, his toes the only things touching the ground. Derek shook him once, and Ricky almost heard his bones rattle.

  With a growl, Derek snarled right in his face. “They will take Zach from you, and he will go into the system. Do you want that? Do you want strangers raising your kid, because when the going gets tough, you hit the bottle? Don’t fuck up the best thing to happen to you by running at the first sign of trouble.”

  Derek let him go, and Ricky stood on solid ground again. “What do you want me to do, Derek? The kid hates me. I can’t be his dad. I’m not a good person. I’m not a good person.”

  Derek folded his arms across his chest. “You are one of the best people I know. You might be a sarcastic pain-in-my-ass, but you are a good person, Rick.”

  Ricky turned away from him, water welling in his eyes. “I’m a fucking junkie.”

  The words came out in a hushed whisper, but Ricky knew that Derek had heard him.

  “Yeah, you are. But what are you gonna do about it?”

  Derek was right; damn he was always right. Rickey didn’t want to lose Zach. The little boy deserved so much more than him as a father, but Ricky wanted to be the best he could possibly be, and he needed to be drug free for that.

  Reaching across the bar, Ricky took the mug of coffee and slugged it down. It did little to clear the fog in his mind, but he looked back at Derek. “I need to get clean. I need to learn how to control my magic, and I need to have done it yesterday.”

  Derek clapped him on the shoulder. “Do you trust me?”

  “With my life.”

  “Good, then come with me.”

  Ricky followed Derek out to his car, his feet not moving very swiftly or with great co-ordination. Derek’s BMW sat outside the main door, and as Ricky got into the passenger seat, he glanced over at Derek.

  “I lost my phone three bars back. Could you text my mom to see if Zach’s okay?”

  Derek started the engine and moved away from the curb as he answered. “I picked Melanie up at your mom’s before I got the call from Emily. Zach was asleep, curled up in your old room. Diane tried to get him to sleep in one of the guest rooms, but your little cat went straight for your room, looked around and said cool, before curling up on the bed to sleep. He’s good.”

  “Cheers.”

  Ricky leaned his head back, closing his eyes, and only came back to consciousness when Derek stopped the car. He must have fallen asleep. Rubbing his eyes, Ricky looked around and saw they had come to Caitlyn’s house.

  “Why are w
e here, D?”

  “Just trust me.”

  Derek’s voice held a slight waver, and Ricky turned to his best friend. “Tell me what the fuck we are doing here, Derek, or I ain’t getting out of the fucking car!”

  “We are getting you clean.”

  They want to take away your will.

  They want to let the magic free to hurt everyone again.

  They don’t want to make you better, they want to make you worse.

  Alarm bells rang like a chorus in his mind, and Ricky flung open the car door, ready to make a bolt for it. As soon as he was in an upright position, Donnie blocked his escape route. The vampire was like a tree; Ricky knew he couldn’t escape.

  “Hey, Donnie, buddy. Let me by, and I promise, no more happy pills for me. I swear. Just let me go, come on. I thought we were friends.”

  Donnie looked uncomfortable. “We are friends, Ricky. That’s why we have to do this.”

  Ricky kicked out at Donnie’s knee, the vampire was taken by surprise as Ricky bolted down the drive, skidding to a stop when Caitlyn blocked his path. There was no way he would hurt Caitlyn, but flames of blue gathered in his palms.

  “Don’t make me do this, Caitlyn. Please don’t do this to me.”

  The gravel behind him crunched as strong arms went around his waist, and he felt himself hoisted over a shoulder. Donnie’s shoulder dug into Ricky’s stomach as he beat a fist against the broad frame of his friend. Caitlyn and Derek followed after, closing the front door and locking it with a click. Donnie strode into the living room, depositing Ricky on the couch.

  As soon as his butt hit the cushion, he darted upright, retreating into the corner of Caitlyn’s living room like a trapped animal. Concern creased the faces of his friends, and deep down, Ricky knew he was being irrational. The only thing keeping him sane right now was the remnants of white rabbit that lingered in his blood.

  He needed to convince them that he was grand.

  “C’mon guys, it’s me. I do stupid, reckless things and I bounce back. There’s no need for this Dr. Phil intervention. I’m grand. I haven’t taken anything since Zach showed up on my doorstep. I promise I won’t take anymore. You guys just need to back off.”

  Ricky heard the lies in his pathetic voice even as a voice as sweet as music said. “That’s a lie and you know it.”

  Melanie stepped around Caitlyn, who tried to bar her way. Melanie held Caitlyn’s gaze for a second before she removed her arm. This he could work with.

  “Lanie, babe,” he said with a grin. “You have to tell them I’m good. C’mon Lanie, this is me, Ricky. You know me. Let’s get out of here, you and me. Please.”

  Melanie shook her head, and Ricky knew he had lost. “Yeah, I do know you. And so do they, even better than I do. Let us help you, Ricky. Let us save you.”

  “I wouldn’t be in this fucking mess if I hadn’t tapped into my magic to try and find you when you got yourself kidnapped.” Ricky clasped a hand over his mouth, horrified at the vile words he had just spoken. Sliding down the wall, he cradled his head in his hands.

  “I know you didn’t mean those words, Ricky. I can taste the lies in your words.”

  Ricky was disgusted with himself, and he clenched his hands into fists and began to beat them against his temples, wanting to feel the pain, needing to feel it. Fingers grazed his wrist and halted his actions. Lifting his head, Ricky looked into Melanie’s eyes and wanted nothing more than to take the sadness away.

  “I’m sorry.”

  “I know.”

  Melanie rose, stepping away from him, as Donnie came to haul him up. A coldness washed over Ricky and he began to shake, even as he tried to stop himself. Ricky glanced over at Derek as he said. “What do you want me to do?”

  “We need to get you clean.”

  “Well duh, but it will take a few days to get the drugs from my system. I haven’t exactly been a one-a-day kinda guy.”

  Caitlyn strode over to him. “We are going to get the toxins out of your system right now, and then we can deal with everything else.”

  “Short of locking me up for a few days until my blood burns through it, how the hell are you gonna get the drugs out of my system?”

  Donnie grinned, using his best count Dracula voice. “We are going to drink your blood.”

  “Or more accurately, I am,” confirmed Caitlyn, as Ricky shrank back.

  “Oh, no way in hell. Caitlyn, my blood’s toxic. You can’t do that.”

  Caitlyn placed her hand on his arm. “Donnie is too young to deal with the blow back of the drugs. I am not. This is happening.”

  “C’mon lads, there has to be another way. I can go cold turkey, not a bother.”

  Melanie sat down on the couch and called him over. Ricky went, simply to get away from Caitlyn. His palms were sweaty when Melanie took his hand in hers and said, “You’ll be okay. I won’t let anything happen to you. Close your eyes for me.”

  Ricky glanced around at the faces of his friends, doing as Melanie asked so he could avoid the pity in their eyes. He felt Caitlyn sweep the hair from the nape of his neck, and he shivered, waiting for the feel of fangs on his neck.

  Caitlyn’s fangs pierced his skin a second later, causing Ricky to jerk. Caitlyn drinking from him was different than the time Donnie had done it. Ricky felt the blood being sucked, felt his head begin to clear as the drugs trickled away.

  Ricky felt himself weaken, his body held up by someone’s steadying hands. He wondered if he could die like this. Even as his strength left him, Ricky felt his body harden, mortified that he had no control. Melanie continued to grip his hand, and he willed Donnie not to say a bloody word.

  Donnie chuckled. “I won’t say a thing, mate.”

  Ricky felt the moment the drugs left his system and his magic came flooding back. The dam built up by the drugs was gone, the firepower inside him building quickly, looking for release. He jerked away from Caitlyn, ripping his throat in the process, so he would not harm her.

  He fell to his knees and vomited. Muscles locked and back arched and flames erupted on his skin, a blue lightning dancing up his arms. It sparked deep inside him, and he screamed, as if his insides were being ripped apart.

  Ricky vaguely heard Melanie scream for help, and Donnie curse, stating they hadn’t thought things through. A ball of magic exploded in his stomach, and Ricky wanted nothing more than to die at that moment. Then all he could hear was the blood rushing to his head as an arm locked him in a chokehold, stopping his ability to breathe.

  The fire lashed out, striking at his assailant, while spots flashed in his vision. His hands grasped the arm at his throat, and when Ricky tried to speak, his words came out in a croaked strangle of sounds. His legs kicked out, sending the coffee table flying, and he was helpless to stop his evitable tumble into the abyss.

  I don’t wanna die…

  It was the last thought he was able to project, and he hoped Donnie heard his plea.

  Right before he fell into darkness, Ricky was sure he heard someone crying.

  Felix sat behind his desk at the arena, trying to match up fights for the coming evening, livid that the berserker had failed to kill the Valkyrie and had left Felix without one of his best fighters. Now that Erika had chosen to abscond also, his investors were screaming for blood, and the blood they wanted was his.

  “How hard is it to keep hold of good staff these days?” Felix muttered to himself.

  “I understand utterly, my friend. People have trouble following orders these days. Where have the good old days gone?”

  Felix leapt out of his seat. The speaker was a man with a snow-white beard and matching hair, an eyepatch covering one eye, and a golden spear in one of his hands. Chaos swirled around the man in dangerous levels, and Felix knew he was in the presence of something other.

  “What do you want?” the chaos demon asked, but the man moved faster than the blink of an eye, his hands twisting Felix’s neck before the demon had the chance to hear a response.

/>   Odin dropped Felix’s body to the ground, morphing his own body into that of the games master. With a tap of his staff on the ground, the dead body disappeared, just as one of the security guards popped his head inside.

  “Everything okay, boss?”

  “Everything is fine. Someone summon the Valkyrie for me. Tell her I have an offer that she cannot refuse.”

  The security nodded, leaving Odin alone in his guise as the games master. Glancing in the mirror, Odin smiled. It was time that he rid the world of the Valkyrie general. With her gone, he would have a clear path at Ever, and not only the keys to Valhalla, but the keys to Ragnorok as well.

  The world would become anew, and when the world was reborn, his beloved Frigg would come back to him, and he would never let her go again.

  Erika

  The arena was eerily quiet when Erika flashed to the abandoned building, the usual hum of noise and cheers gone. Perhaps that should have been her first clue that not all was right in the world when she left Loki in her bed to answer the games master’s summons. She could still feel Loki’s touch on her skin, and she still wanted him. Despite the murmured promises that he had whispered while their bodies were intertwined, she found it hard to believe that he would not grow bored of her and leave her in shattered pieces when he was done sating himself.

  Packing up the few bits of clothing and weapons she had at her room at the arena, she felt a strange awareness prick her senses. Abandoning her belongings, she grabbed her blades and strode out of the room, sauntering down the hall, blades out in front of her.

  The hall was abandoned, as was the viewing area. Every instinct in Erika’s body told her to flee, but curiosity got the better of her. Glancing down at the octagon, Erika could see Felix draped over a high-backed chair in the centre of the ring. The blue-skinned chaos demon lounged in the chair as if it were a throne, and the arena was his kingdom.