Never Back Down

by Susan Harris

  “We use everything we have in our arsenal. Before, it was us Valkyrie who bore the cost, and we went it alone. We have your champion, we have warriors that will fight with us. We bring them in on this, and Odin will not see us coming. He will expect us to close rank, fight him by ourselves. We do all that we can to finish this once and for all.”

  They held each other’s gaze for a second before Ever nodded. “I will follow you, Erika. We do this for our futures.”

  “And we do this for all those we lost in battle.”

  Removing her hands from Ever’s shoulders, Erika glanced over at Loki, who watched her with a bemused smile on his face.

  “How about you, mischief maker? You wanna say screw the rules with us and possibly incur the wrath of Thor?”

  Loki folded his arms across his chest. “I’ve never been fond of rules, anyways. I will follow you, Erika. Even if it’s just to watch your pretty ass.”

  Ever smacked herself in the face. “I think I’m going to be sick.”

  “Then turn away now, sister dear.” He swooped in like a hurricane, wild and furious, as he kissed Erika. She kissed him back, ignoring the doubt that lurked in her mind that this could not, and would not, last.

  If she was going to die soon anyway, Erika wanted to die with a smile on her face, rather than regret in her mind. When she pulled back from Loki, he cupped her cheek and she held her breath. The end of the world was coming, but she would go down swinging with those she was proud to call her friends by her side.

  Peering over at Ever, Erika tugged up her lips. “I guess this means you need to have a conversation with ‘Boyband’.”

  As her friend groaned, Erika laughed, and a weight lifted from her shoulders.

  Loki

  Odin’s rage and despair could be heard in the skies above Asgard, thunder and lightning ripping through the city, striking out at buildings and monuments, the ground beneath the city trembling against the anguish that sent the Allfather into a tailspin.

  For it was on this night that Odin lost his beloved Frigg, and Thor and Loki lost the only mother they had known. The very moment Frigg took her last breath, those born of her had wept openly, pressing kisses to their mother’s cheeks before being escorted from the room, leaving Odin to his grief. Thor had tried to offer some comfort to his father, yet Odin had dismissed his favoured son with the swipe of his hand. Thor brushed his knuckles over his mother’s cheek even as Lady Sif led him from the room.

  He had paused at the doorway, his eyes meeting Loki’s, and then he was gone from sight, leaving Loki to deal with Odin. It was strange to him, to feel compassion for a man who had in all essence murdered his entire tribe and then spared Loki because he looked like an Asgardian on the outside.

  As Odin stood beside the bed where Frigg lay, Loki bent down and pressed a kiss to the woman’s cheek. She had been one of the only people besides Thor to treat Loki with any affection after Odin had brought him back from Jotunheim. Almost immediately, Frigg had bundled Loki into her arms and insisted that he become family instead of a prisoner of war.

  When, as a child, Loki had been responsible for the death of Baldur, Frigg and Odin’s handsomest son, she had not banished Loki like he suspected she would. Instead, the goddess kept Loki so busy that he had little time for mischief. She shared with him a love for books, the ability to slip between the pages, escape to another world, and experience the magic within the pressed pages. They sat for hours listening to music, neither of them speaking.

  What Loki held dearest in his heart were the times when he could not sleep after seeing his parents’ deaths in his dreams, frost licking his skin and the pale cream colour turning blue. Frigg ignored the sharp burn of the frost to cradle him in her arms and hum a lullaby until he had calmed down enough to stop the tears from falling. She had never spoken of Loki’s night terrors, for Odin was not one for weakness.

  The goddess Eir had lain a hand on Odin’s arm and said that Frigg could not be healed, for there was no cure for a broken heart. Having lost two sons, Frigg found it hard to deal with the sorrow. She had fallen into the deep sleep of immortals, until her heart simply stopped beating.

  What no one, not even Thor, knew was that a day before Frigg had fallen into her slumber, she and Loki had been seated in the helm of the keep, in the great library that held all of Asgardian history and those of the nine realms. Loki had been engrossed in a novel, one of his favourites, The Bacchae, a Greek tragedy by Euripide, when Frigg had set down her book and risen.

  “Out of all of my children,” she sighed, glancing out the glass window at the kingdom before her. “It is you that I worry much over, son.”

  Loki smiled, that rush to his heart whenever the beautiful goddess called him son. “Fear for me, mother? Why would you do such a silly thing?”

  Frigg turned to face him, and the smile that tugged on her lips did not quite reach her eyes of golden brown. “I worry that should something happen to me, you would be alone. You guard your heart more than you should, Loki. You cannot spend eternity by yourself.”

  Loki closed the book, set it down on the seat beside him, and rose. “Mother, I am quite content to spend eternity alone. I see what humanity has done in the name of love and I do not want it. Besides, I should rather spend eternity reading good books, and listening to prose and poetry with you, while still finding time to get up to mischief with Thor. Please do not speak of such melancholy.”

  Walking over to stand in front of him, Frigg took his face in her hands, and he blinked in surprise. “I want for you, dearest child, to find that all-consuming love, the one that comes out of nowhere and holds you captive. Find that one person who you think of constantly, who makes you want to be more, be better. It is a wonderful thing to find someone who sees you as you are and loves you terribly. Every night with a different lover tires after time. Coming home to someone who knows your wants and needs, that is what happiness feels like.”

  “Mother…” Loki began, before Frigg shushed him.

  “Promise me that you will not close your heart off. I want for you to find someone who will challenge you, who will not be afraid to argue with you, but will also show you that you are loved by them. Do not settle for someone who will not have you seeing the best of you. Love, my dearest Loki, love with all that you are and make me proud. Promise me.”

  Loki had studied the desperation in the eyes of the only woman he had called mother and promised her that he would try. She had kissed him, asking him to read for her while she rested her eyes, as she was just a little tired. Loki had spent twenty minutes reading before he realized that something was utterly wrong and alerted Odin.

  A mere forty-eight hours later, and Frigg had been gone.

  Loki pushed aside the memory, along with his own grief, and came to stand beside Odin.

  “Asgard has lost one of its treasures. We must hold strong for the people. Show them that we stand strong.”

  Thunder snapped outside and Loki could hear the sound of glass crashing as Odin spun on him and snarled. “I have lost my only love! I do not care whether or not the people of Asgard mourn, or what you, son of frost, have to say. Be gone from my sight before I do what I should have done when I first laid eyes on you and dashed your brains out against the concrete.”

  Loki shuddered at the venom in Odin’s voice, watched as darkness seeped into the man who craved knowledge more than power once, and saw that the road ahead would not be a pleasant one.

  He spared one last look at his mother and flashed from the keep, unsure of where he would go. His feet settled on the shores of Valhalla, in search of the one person who Loki could not get out of his mind, even if she were too young for him, barely into her second decade of life.

  Erika sat in the sand, her toes kissed by the crest of the waves, her long whiskey-kissed hair hanging loose down her back. The moonlight glinted against the bronze of her skin, giving off the appearance that it almost glittered. Her palms were planted on the sand, and she looked entirely pe
aceful, the only sound in the darkness of night was the crashing of the waves and the lull of her breathing.

  Since he had first laid eyes on Erika, he had felt this deep connection with the Valkyrie, had found himself wanting to be near her, if only to hear her barbs against him.

  Was this what Frigg had spoken of when she spoke of love and finding someone who challenged him? If love caused someone to forget who they were, was it even worth it?

  Erika did not give any indication that she knew he was there, yet she always knew, much like he knew when she arrived at the keep with Ever in tow. Flicking out his long cloak, Loki plonked down beside her, but refrained from speaking. They sat for a time, watching the waves roll in and out of the shore.

  “I was sorry to hear about your mother.”

  Loki turned his head to peer at her, the stunning profile of a woman who did not know how breath-taking she was. Erika tilted her head to look at him, a small sad smile on her full lips.

  “Thank you.”

  “It’s hard to say goodbye to someone you love.”

  “It is.”

  He felt that he had no other words for her, however she placed her hand on top of his knee before saying, “The world is full of beautiful things that we take for granted. But, how can we have beauty without seeing the ugly too? Life must have balance, and that is death. I have seen many deaths in my short life, yet I have not experienced the loss of a loved one. It would seem that even we immortals are to be kissed by death also.”

  Loki blinked in surprise. Erika, the usually upbeat if not snarky best friend of the sister he had chosen for himself, was lulled into the same melancholy that Loki tended to find himself in.

  “You are far too young and beautiful to be this cynical.”

  Erika snorted, yet Loki saw a faint hint of a blush creep into her cheeks. Oh, by the gods, he wanted to kiss her. He wanted nothing more than to lower her into the sand and hear her moan his name. Yet, he refrained. Not because he had the self-control, but because he could not offer her an eternity of faithfulness. He could not promise that he would be hers and hers alone, and she deserved that. He thought this even as she leaned in to press her lips against his.

  He pulled back, and a deep shade of red coloured her cheeks.

  “I’m sorry…I don’t…I mean…” she stuttered, scrambling off the sand as Loki ruined the peace of the night. He should not have come. He should have stayed in Asgard and away from the Valkyrie that tempted him so.

  As she fled from the beach without sparing him a second glance, Loki could not erase the weight in his chest that he had not lost one person he cared for this night, but two. And perhaps, it was for the best.

  Loki bolted upright in his bed, the memories of the night Frigg had died playing out like his worst nightmare. After losing Frigg, Loki had covered his heart in a cage of ice, trying to block out sadness and grief, and especially love, which was a foreign emotion for him. The people he loved could be counted on one finger. Yet, coming to the realization that he was in love with Erika caused ice to formulate in his veins, because his actions over the years, as well as the life she had lived, had hardened her so that she expected the worst from him.

  The realization had occurred shortly after the night when Loki slept with the chieftain’s daughter and invoked the curse upon him. The medicine woman had been right. The moment his heart began to feel something for Erika, long before the curse, Loki had felt his end coming.

  After a night with Erika in his bed, Loki did not want to spend another alone. In fact, he was quite resigned to his fate, and if he spent his last days with the woman who melted his heart of ice, then so be it.

  He clicked his fingers, dressing in jeans and a tee, and willed himself to find Erika. He found himself standing in the little apartment above Ever’s garage. The one bedroom was Erika to a tee. It held no material possessions, and the walls were blank apart from some décor that Ever had placed there. The bed was unmade, a trunk of weapons lying open at its base. She would not be wooed by flowers and clothing; his woman was a warrior true and true.

  Leaning against the wall, he heard her stomp up the steps, laughing at something Ever called after her. Erika flung open the bedroom door, spinning round when she sensed his aura in the room, the warrior in her reaching for the dagger at her waist. He reached out his arm and pushed the door closed. She stared at him for a moment, her expression unreadable, yet he could hear the quickening of her heartbeat.

  “Don’t you realize it’s creepy to turn up in a girl’s bedroom unannounced?”

  “I was trying to be romantic. Had I more time, then I would have lit some candles and made the bed.”

  Erika barked out a laugh, and then she sobered, her expression going grim. “Why are you here, Loki?”

  He shoved his hands into his pockets, but held her gaze. “I came to assure myself that you knew that things between us have changed. I won’t allow you to take another man or woman into your bed, unless we are having some fun time. And I would never take another to my bed unless you wanted to watch.”

  Lust flashed in her eyes as she chewed on her bottom lip. Her hands planted on her hips, she watched him, as if she dared him to go on.

  “I don’t share, Erika. You kissed me in front of Ever. You indicated that things between us had ventured outside of being platonic.”

  “Things between us have never been platonic.” Erika snorted.

  Loki took a step toward her, his lips curving into a sly, seductive smile. “I agree. I tried to get you out of my mind, but you were never far from my thoughts. Dirty, delicious thoughts. I want to make it perfectly clear, Erika. I want to be yours… I want to be a part of your life. This is not just about sex, this is about finally realizing that everything I have been searching for, been waiting for, was right in front of my eyes all along.”

  She swallowed hard, and he could hear the conflict in her mind, the fears and the facts bouncing off one another. He inched closer, standing a breath away from her. “Frigg told me the day before she died that she wanted me to find the one person who I would think of constantly, who made me want to be more, be better. She asked me to allow my heart to find the person who challenges me, and who does not let me get away with the mischief and mayhem I bring with me. I ran from you that night on the beach, but I am done running.”

  Erika took a step back. Her fear, as cold as the ice that ran in his veins, rained down over him. She continued to back up until her back hit the farthest wall.

  “I’m sorry, Loki. I really am. But I’ve told you before, Ever has to be my priority. When I am with you, I can’t think about anything else or anyone else. Goddamn it, even when you’re not here, I eventually begin to think of you. I cannot afford that. Yes, I kissed you in front of Ever, but I was riding high on adrenaline. I can’t promise forever, because even immortals are kissed by death.”

  Her words, the same she had spoken the night Frigg had died, came back to haunt him. Loki felt Erika slipping through his fingers, and he was not about to let that happen.

  Striding over to where she stood, he fisted his hand in her hair, giving it a little tug so that she looked up at him. Bending down, he captured her full lips with his. When he swiped his tongue across her lips, she gasped, opening her mouth for him. He kissed her hard, tasting and sucking her tongue until they were both breathless.

  Pulling away just a tad, he took a step back and lied to her, “Do not promise me forever. I have to have you, even if it is only for one more night. I beg you.”

  She swallowed hard, looking like she was going to say no. He knew his actions over the years had been too much for her to believe a word he had spoken, especially since his last sentence had been complete lies. Still, he did not intend to let her go.

  He turned away before she could read him, her voice sounding like the most beautiful of poetry or the most exquisite melody as she whispered, “Just one more night.”

  Loki was in front of her a second later, his own heart feeling like i
t would explode from his chest. He tore her clothing from her, as she popped open the button to his jeans and shoved them down. Not bothering to kick them off, he lifted her into his arms and leaned her back against the wall. Her body heated at his touch, his cock rock hard.

  “I should have known you’d go commando,” she mused with a chuckle.

  He answered by angling her body and sliding into her tight sheath to the hilt. She swore, causing him to laugh. They both froze as music started to play loudly downstairs. The surprise of it causing them to both laugh, and Erika latched her arms around Loki’s neck.

  He began to move, slowly at first, sliding in and out as she held on tightly to his neck. When she kissed her way down his jaw, his body caught fire, and he let go of his control and pounded into her, her back slamming against the wall hard enough that the walls shook. Loki kept the frantic pace, capturing Erika’s mouth to stifle her screams of climax, even as he emptied himself inside her.

  With Erika still clinging to him, Loki kicked off his jeans and strode to the bed. His cock was still inside her, hardening again as the tiny aftershocks of her orgasm gripped him tightly. Lying her on the edge of the bed, he began to move once more. He forgot about the curse, forgot about Odin, and even forgot about Frigg.

  Concentrating on having his way with the gorgeous Valkyrie writhing beneath him, Loki vowed to make her his, no matter the cost.

  Ricky

  “What’s it feel like to fuck the dead, brother? Do you find yourself wishing you’d had a piece of that ass when she’d been alive with blood in her veins? And now you can compare what it’s like to have fucked an animal and a dead girl.”

  Ricky tossed back the shot of tequila in front of him, slamming the empty glass down on the counter before he called Emily, one of the bar staff at Josephine’s, to get him another. Having left Zach in his mother’s capable hands, Ricky had spent most of the evening trying to consume as much alcohol as possible. His goal was to black out. So far, he wasn’t having much luck, but the night was still young. He also felt like a massive dickhead for abandoning Melanie, but if he’d stayed under the same roof as Killian, Ricky might have killed the little shit.