Tomorrow's June

by Claudia Caget

  Serena, for her part, looked is if she was loving the attention attractive blonds usually get. When he stopped at a table close to the front of the stage, he turned and said something to her. I could see the intensity of gaze from across the room. His long lashes framed his flashing blue eyes as he leaned his forehead on hers, taking her face in his hands. She looked up at him but the intensity was all one-sided and she didn’t respond to him. He let her go and she sat down and looked around like she was bored, tossing her mane of blond hair over her shoulder as she scanned the crowd.

  There was trouble in paradise.

  "What do you think of him?" I asked Sarah as we sat sipping beers, watching the action.

  "Hmmm. He's cute. Is that his girlfriend?"

  "Yes, that blond girl. I am the back-up,” I said, unable to take my eyes off of him.

  Sarah laughed. "Good luck with that then."

  Noah climbed onto the low, wooden stage and, along with his band mates, started to get the equipment ready for the show. There was always an interminable delay until a band started playing, no matter what the venue and my feet tapped out an excited, if impatient, beat while the bar slowly filled up. I had wondered if Noah’s band was able to attract a crowd and was answered by an influx of hipster types, including guys with berets and girls wearing knee socks. Who knew these types of people lived in Toledo?

  Finally, the band started to play and people immediately crowded around the stage. Serena stood up from the table and walked over to the side of the stage. She hovered on the edge of the crowd as if she was waiting for someone. I couldn’t tell from my vantage point if Noah was able to clearly see her where she stood although he did track her progress from the table. She stood there alone for a moment until, from out of the shadows, a creepy-looking older guy walked up to her and they started talking. They were laughing like they knew each other pretty well.

  The band tore through several songs as Serena continued to talk to the guy. Noah’s legs were planted wide, both of his fists encircled the microphone, and he was singing through bared teeth as he glared at the two of them, but they paid no attention. Even though I was sitting across the room, I could see the scene deteriorating in front of me. It wasn’t going to end well.

  Suddenly, Noah jumped off the stage, elbowing his way through the crowd to Serena. He jumped on the older guy’s back, tackling him to the ground and then began to punch him in the face. Serena screamed and jumped on Noah's back. People crowded around the brawlers, blocking my view, so I got up and moved closer for a better look.

  The band stopped playing as everyone watched the three of them roll around on the ground. Serena would jump on Noah's back, he would shake her off, then punch the other guy, who was ineffectively defending himself against the onslaught of Noah’s fists.

  It was two against one, but Noah looked like he was taking care of himself against a girl and a senior citizen, and really, he was beating the crap out of the guy on the floor. After several minutes, the bouncers came and pulled Noah off the guy and they threw the other guy out.

  If relations were frosty between Serena and Noah before, it was nothing compared to the screaming match they got into now. Plainly audible were the accusations of infidelity being lobbed by Noah. The whole scene was chaos. I was smitten. I love bad boys.

  Serena finally walked out, followed by Noah. One of his band mates said, "Sorry about the technical difficulties," into the microphone. The crowd clearly enjoyed the floorshow, cheering for more. Sarah turned to me, shaking her head.

  "He's kind of intense."

  "I know, don't you just love it?" I lifted my beer to wet my dry mouth. Sarah laughed.

  Noah came back in, looking dejected. Apparently, the band was finished for the evening.

  “Well, I would think they are broken up over that display, how about you?” I said to Sarah.

  She laughed and shook her head again. “I don't know. He doesn't look like he would let her go without a fight.”

  “You are probably right.”

  Sarah and I waited until the equipment was packed up a bit before I went up to Noah and asked what happened.

  He looked up, his eyes wide.

  "Hi Mia. Did you see that? She has been screwing that guy for weeks! She thinks I don't know about it! We just broke up! What a fucking slut!" Noah squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head as if to remove the vision from his memory. He looked incredibly vulnerable at the moment, so I decided to make my move.

  "Oh, God Noah, that's awful! It happened to both of us! Do you want to talk to someone who's been there?"

  Noah looked at me for a second. "Yeah, come on over. I have beer."

  "Okay. I'll be there within the hour."

  I turned and walked towards Sarah, a huge smile on my face, and we left the bar.

  "Yes! I am picking up the pieces of his broken heart." I danced a little jig of glee outside on the sidewalk as we walked toward the car.

  "You better take some condoms, then." Sarah pulled some out of her purse and handed them to me.

  "Sarah!" I looked around to see if anyone saw her give them to me, but didn't notice anyone.

  "What? If we waited for the guys to provide birth control we all would have several children by now."

  I laughed. She had a point, but I had my own condoms at home and told her.

  “I am going to go home and change my clothes anyway. I will make sure I take some,” I said, handing them back to her. I was very impressed that she traveled with a whole row of condoms in her purse. I wasn’t that organized.

  “Okay. Just be careful.”

  “I will. We will have to go out for real sometime, not just to help me pick up guys,” I said as I dropped her off in front of her apartment.

  “Definitely. I work tomorrow night. You will have to give me all of the details,” Sarah said as she opened the car door.

  “I will.”

  I waited to make sure she got into her apartment okay and then went home to straighten out the mess that I was.

  I changed into a lacy bra and a thong, although I was quite sure I wasn't going to "do anything" with him, despite what Sarah thought. It didn't seem right and who knows? He and Serena might get back together and I wasn't that much of a slut. What I did know was that I wouldn't mind being Noah's girlfriend and it would be irresponsible of me not to test the waters and find out if he was interested. I realized I didn't know him really well. What did I know about him? I asked my reflection in the mirror.

  He was cute. His parents were loaded. He played the guitar. He was smart although he hadn't gone to college. He was going to be a rock star. He had been going out with Serena for something like four years.

  That was it.

  I reassured myself that relationships have been started on shakier circumstances as I applied bright red lipstick with my shaky hand. He was a childhood friend of Ian’s, for God's sake.

  As I got into the car, I realized that I didn't know where Noah lived, exactly. Ian and I had gone over to his house when we first started going out but maybe he didn't live there anymore! What an idiot I was.

  I drove over to his last known address in Ramrock Gardens, which was really close to where I lived. The place had an army barracks feel to it, all squatty, red concrete and drafty, casement windows. The mailbox for the apartment I thought was his did not have his name on it. Damn it!

  I had to figure something out. I hopped back into the car and drove to the nearest corner where I found Toledo's only public phone book, hanging by a thread. He wasn't listed. Not wanting to give up, I called information, and miracle of miracles, directory assistance was able to find a listing for him.

  So I called him.

  "Hello?" Noah's voice rose.

  "Hi, Noah?"

  "Yea?" He sounded disappointed.

  "It's me, Mia. I just realized I don't know where you live!"

  "Oh hi Mia. Um, I live in Sylvania, on Main, near the line. The address is 53279."

  "Okay, I'll see you s
oon!" I tried to sound as cheerful as possible. People like happy.

  He mumbled something I couldn't understand and I hung up.

  It didn't sound like he wanted me there. He was obviously upset. He had had a bad night I thought as I drove to his house, but it didn't stop me. There was an opening and I had to take it.

  Sylvania was scary. The only thing the cops had to do was stop suspected drunk drivers. I had one beer but was so nervous I couldn't keep the wheel straight.

  When I finally pulled into Noah's driveway, the place was lit up like Christmas. The house, which sat back from the road, was an old Victorian with shutters, curlicues, and whatnot. It looked like a giant dollhouse. I wondered how many people lived there because the driveway was filled with cars. Through the windows, I could see people walking around. It looked like a party.

  I walked in and recognized several people right away. Noah's band mates were there as were several of Ian's friends from high school that I had met in the past. I walked up to Jason Smith, a guy I knew through Ian.

  "Hi! Do you know where Noah is?" I said, trying to be heard over the music.

  "Hi Mia! How's it going? Are you still with Ian?"

  "No, we just broke up. He's an asshole. Do you know where Noah is?"

  "I hear ya. Noah's upstairs in his room."

  "Thanks." I was shouting by this time.

  I went upstairs and searched around for the right door, finding it after opening and closing several doors.

  Inside, I found Noah sitting on the floor next to the bed, talking on the phone. He was drinking a beer and smoking a cigarette. He motioned for me to come in.

  "Listen Julie, I know that she is there. I want to talk to her." He sounded upset.

  I went in and sat at the edge of the bed. This didn't look good.

  "Put her on the phone. Just do it. Hello? Serena? Listen, you gave me no choice! That guy is old enough to be your dad! What the fuck were you thinking?"

  Silence. I looked down at my clenched hands.

  "I am not yelling at you. I thought we had something here! How long have you been going out behind my back with this guy?"

  Silence. I looked around his room.

  "Three months? Do you love him?"

  There were a lot of pictures of Noah and Serena together.

  "Well, why are you fucking him then?"

  There were a lot of pictures of just Serena.

  "Yea, I know I am hard to get along with. I think we need a break from each other."

  My head snapped back to look at Noah. Did I just hear what I thought I heard?

  "Yeah, I'm gonna have to call you tomorrow. I can't think straight right now. I can't believe you did that to me. I have to go."

  Noah hung up and buried his face in his hands.

  I went over and touched his shoulder.

  "Noah, I'm sorry. I know exactly how you feel."

  Noah looked up. His eyes were red. "Yeah, you do, don't you Mia? I can't believe people! You give them so much and they just piss it away!"

  "Tell me about it! Ian was sleeping with that girl for eight months! He even got her pregnant!" Meet me, professional victim.

  "Come here." Noah pulled me down on the floor next to him and we hugged each other. My heart beat wildly. Something's gonna happen, I knew it! Noah let me go and I leaned into him. He grabbed my hand.

  "I'm glad we're friends, Mia. I really need friends right now."

  "Of course I'm your friend Noah. I'm sorry about what happened."

  "Me too. Do you want a beer?"

  "Yea, that would be great!"

  "They are downstairs in the kitchen. Bring me one would you?"

  "Uh, sure. I'll be right back." I got up from the floor as gracefully as I could and went into the hall and downstairs.

  I wound my way through the crowd to the kitchen. When I got back upstairs, Noah was sitting on his bed, playing his guitar.

  "Thanks a lot. Are there a lot of people downstairs?" Noah took the beer I offered.

  "Yea, it's packed down there. Do you live here alone?"

  "No, a couple of the guys stay here. They have rooms. This is one of my parent's houses. We practice here. The guys bring their girlfriends here. Serena stayed here ... ." Noah trailed off, his voice suddenly choked up.

  "Hey, it's okay." I sat next to him on the bed, putting my hand on his shoulder. "Maybe you guys will get back together."

  "I don't know if that will happen. I'm so glad you are here Mia."

  "Me too." I leaned my head on his shoulder. This is great! I'll take a pity date with this guy any day! He was hot.

  "I feel awful."

  "I know. What can I do to help?"

  Noah lay back on the bed, his guitar lying on his chest. "Just stay with me."

  "Okay." I lay down next to him. The thought then crossed my mind that this was kind of weird and for a moment, I wondered why I was there and why I was doing this. I didn't listen to those thoughts though. I put them out of my mind.

  Noah sat up suddenly and said he would be right back. He placed the guitar in its stand and left the room and came back shortly, locking the door behind him.

  "I had to go to the bathroom."

  "Oh." I look over to the master bathroom in the corner and wonder why he didn't use that one.

  Noah lay back down and immediately started kissing me. I let him kiss me. I let him take off my shirt and my pants. I didn't care. I was with him and I was happy. Soon, I was lying in my lace bra and thong, wondering where my purse was. It turned out I didn't need my purse and the condoms I threw in there from home. I ended up giving him a blowjob instead.

  The next day at work, when I told Kurt a censored version of this story, he became extremely upset. Just think of how he would have reacted if he knew the truth!

  "What is wrong with you?" I asked him, all innocent intent. I knew what was wrong, but it was a little upsetting that he got to have a girlfriend and a half and I got only a half a boyfriend.

  "How could you go over there? You don't even know this guy! Did you do anything with him?

  Kurt knew me better than I thought.

  "No of course not!" I lied. "And I do too know him! It's really none of your business who my friends are!"

  We were standing in the stockroom almost nose-to-nose, yelling quietly at each other.

  "It is too my business! We are going out here." Kurt pointed to both of us. The nerve!

  "Yea, you, me and your girlfriend! You have no right to say that to me! If you are so concerned, break up with her and go out with me exclusively." How’s that for an ultimatum?

  "You know how I feel about that Mia. I can't hurt Hannah. We have been together for a long time. We have a history together." Kurt was very quiet.

  "A history? What do you and I have then? Until you leave Hannah to be with me, I will do what I want, when I want."

  With that I walked out of the kitchen and found Noah waiting for me at the counter.

  I was surprised because I was a total slut last night; I thought he would never contact me again.

  "Hi Mia." Noah smiled at me.

  "Hi, Noah!" Behind me I could hear Kurt grunt loudly. I ignored him, giving Noah the full attention of my smile. "How are you?"

  "Fine. Thanks for staying with me last night. I really needed someone to talk to."

  "You're welcome. Did you talk to Serena?" Outwardly, I was calm, but inside, my head was swimming.

  "Yes, we are definitely broke up. I don't want to talk about it. What time do you get off work?"

  "5:00."

  "Great. Come over after work. We'll get something to eat."

  "Okay." Yippee! Noah was very good looking.

  After he left, I turned around and looked at Kurt who was giving me a death look. I walked toward him and kept my voice low so the customers couldn't hear us. We were working another long afternoon alone together behind the counter. Hannah and Sarah were scheduled to come in at 3 until close, but at that moment, we were alone, except for the cu
stomers.

  "Kurt. I'm sorry, but I don’t want to be alone. You get to go home to Hannah, and I just get to go home by myself. I want someone too. Break up with her."

  "You know I can't do that. I hate sharing you," he said. He was half-smiling, half-frowning.

  "I hate sharing you, too," I answered, not really feeling it any more. His reaction to Noah was a turn off. If he loved me so much, he would break up with Hannah.

  He led me into the kitchen and gave me a long kiss.

  "Well just remember that I am here and I love you very much. I want to make sure we still have time together."

  "I promise," I said looking into his navy blue eyes. Roughly translated this meant 'be available for sex whenever I want’. He was getting very demanding. I wasn't sure what to do about it.

  When Sarah came in at 3, I updated her on what happened, the X-rated version that Kurt wasn't privy to.

  “I have done that before,” Sarah said. “Sometimes you have to go to extremes to make sure you get their attention.”

  “I totally agree,” I said, nodding. “I had to strike while the iron was hot. And it worked. He came in a couple of hours ago and asked me to come over after work.”

  “Did he? That is really great!” Sarah's eyes were wide from my good fortune.

  “I know! Keep your fingers crossed for me.”

  As I was getting ready to leave for the day, Kurt grabbed my arm

  "Don't you fuck him.” He hissed it at me.

  "I could say the same thing to you about Hannah, but I won't." I hissed back. Kurt was starting to piss me off. I was not property that needed to be taken care of. This was my life here! He had a poor attitude about our so-called relationship. My newfound mantra, “If he loved me so much, he should leave Hannah and be with me,” played in my head. Until he left her, he had no say over my life.

  I left work, went home to change, and then drove over to Noah's house. Band practice was in full swing. Noah was so good looking. I lost myself for a minute while watching him. What was I doing there? I was sure he still loved Serena. I was setting myself up for major hurt. I didn't want to get into over my head, but I couldn't help it. I liked him.

  I watched him while he sang to me in the microphone up on stage. It was a hard sell and it worked. I fell in love with him right then and there.