Tomorrow's June

by Claudia Caget

  "I won't say anything about that." Why would I tell people about that? It was a reflection on me, too.

  Ian, again, looked like he might cry. He grabbed my hands.

  "Thank you, Mia, thank you. I will be eternally grateful."

  His behavior made perfect sense now. He was kissing my ass because he wanted to make sure I wouldn't say anything about his affection for dildos. It was now apparent to me that he was trying to let me off easy so I wouldn't be mad and spill his secret. I don't know where he got the idea I wasn't trustworthy. Honestly.

  "So what's next for you two?"

  "We are moving to Chicago together. I am pretty excited."

  "Great." I nodded my head to indicate my happiness for him.

  Ian squeezed my hands. "Come on Mia. You are still young enough to find someone."

  "What?"

  "Yeah, you're only 26, you have a couple of years left to find someone who loves you."

  I couldn't believe my ears. He was feeling SORRY for me?

  "I could set you up with one of my fraternity brothers," he said. "How about Seth?"

  "Seth? He once gave me his number and told me to call him if I wanted to have a threesome."

  Ian was unfazed by this bit of information. "There has to be somebody for you. I'll ask around."

  "I don't think so Ian. I don't need help finding a date."

  "There has to be somebody for you," he repeated.

  "Ian, I don't want to be set up with any of your fraternity brothers, okay? I think they are a bunch of losers."

  "You know, you could probably meet more people if you stopped hanging out with the people you work with. I think that Kurt is a loser."

  At least he didn't say, ‘I think you are sleeping with that Kurt, who, by the way, was a loser.’

  "What?" I swallowed hard, my stomach hardening.

  "Mia, don't get bitter."

  I almost lost it. Me, bitter! I wanted to blurt out that I was sleeping around on him too, but I couldn't. I would lose the shaky moral high ground I was standing on. I had to get out of there.

  "Listen Ian, I have to go," I stood up abruptly.

  Ian looked down at his watch.

  "Me too!" In one fluid motion, he jumped up, leaned over, and kissed me on the cheek before I could move out of the way.

  "Good luck, Mia," he said, straightening up. He turned and walked toward the door.

  "Good luck," I said, watching him leave.

  I turned and walked to the counter where Kurt was waiting for me. Instead of feeling relieved that I didn't have to sneak around on my boyfriend anymore, I felt unsettled by the whole situation and I certainly didn't want to talk about it.

  "Honey what happened?" Kurt half-smiled at me.

  I shook my head, suddenly wanting to cry. I felt like a big loser. I bit my lip and my voice came out in a whisper.

  "I don't want to talk about it. We'll talk later, okay? I just want to go home."

  "Okay, I'll call you later!" Kurt sounded over excited by the possibility.

  I turned and walked toward the door.

  Chapter 7

  I needed air. The pity in Ian's voice made me want to run far away and I practically ran out the door of The Garden into the cold Toledo afternoon. It helped, as did walking down the sidewalk. I kept my head down, periodically checking to make sure I didn't run over any little old ladies coming out of the health food store, but not enough to make eye contact with anyone. Which was how I bumped into Noah Westin, III, literally.

  Like a setup in the movies, I ran headlong into Noah's chest on the sidewalk. He didn't drop the papers he was carrying and I didn't fall down, and although he did grab my arm to steady me, it was poetic all the same.

  “Oh, I am so sorry,” I said, my voice muffled in his chest. When I looked up, Noah was smiling at me.

  What a luscious specimen Noah was! Another blue-eyed blond, Noah wore his hair long, his jackets faded, his jeans torn, and his tennis shoes scuffed. He was also in a band and was one of Ian's childhood friends. I had always fascinated by how such a small neighborhood produced two really hot guys with similar looks who, by all accounts, were not related, but being a small neighborhood, they were probably brothers and didn't know it.

  Noah’s family had struck it big-time rich when Noah and Ian were in their pre-teens and the family moved on to bigger and better neighborhoods. There was probably some residual jealousy there, which was probably the reason Ian and Noah weren't close friends anymore after graduating from high school; that and they had nothing in common. Whereas Ian had to get into college so he could get on with supporting himself, Noah was one of those rich guys who eschew college for more idle pursuits, such as rock stardom or horse breeding.

  No matter, Noah was just gorgeous, his family was a mess, and he dating one of those blond, ice goddess-types. I think she was Swedish.

  "Mia, hi!" Noah said, still holding onto my arm.

  "Hi Noah. I'm not having a good day," I felt like a big idiot, but smiled at him anyway.

  "Yea, I know what you mean." Noah smiled back. I think his eyes twinkled. Can eyes really twinkle?

  "How are you doing? I haven't seen you in a long time! How is Serena?" The ice goddess.

  "Fine. How is Ian?"

  Oh yeah, Ian. I avoided his gaze while I spoke. "Well, not bad if you consider he has been cheating on me for months with this some girl from UT and that he knocked her up." I tried to laugh but it sounded really forced and fake.

  "That sounds like Ian! Always playing the jerk. You can do better."

  "Thanks," I was ready to forget all about Ian. What about Noah? It was like he could read my mind.

  "My band is playing out on Friday at Marty’s Lounge. You should come. It will put you in a good mood," he said, handing me one of the flyers he was holding with his free hand.

  "Oh, okay, maybe I will," I said glancing down at the paper.

  "Well, I have to go and hang the rest of these up," Noah said, smiling again at me. He was like a ray of sunshine "Bring some friends."

  “Okay. Good to see you again Noah.”

  “You too!”

  I watched him while he turned and walked toward the parking lot.

  What a difference ten minutes made. I felt better as I walked toward my car.

  "He is just so gorgeous," I said to Kurt, describing Noah, the next day at work.

  Kurt looked none too pleased and continued to wipe the counter.

  "He sounds like a pretentious asshole. Noah Westin, the third? That means there are two other Noah Westins out there? How come I have never heard of this guy?"

  "Oh, Ian and I stopped hanging out with him and his girlfriend a long time ago. He is not what you would call frat boy material. You know Ian and his social whirl," I roll my eyes.

  Kurt emitted a loud grunt in response that made me laugh. He was so cute when he was jealous.

  It was mid-afternoon at the Garden, my favorite time to work. It wasn't so busy that you couldn't hear yourself think. Hannah wasn't in yet, and it was just Kurt, me, Charles, and Jeff the owner, who were both in other parts of the store. The place was unusually quiet, with only the hum of the refrigerator in the background. The Muzak system had been broken for two months and I didn't miss it one bit. I liked the quiet.

  Usually, the mid-afternoon, after the lunch rush, was the time to clean up, stock up, sit down, do nothing, and today was no different.

  I left Kurt behind to man the counter and went to straighten up the women's restroom. I went inside the stockroom just inside the restroom door, which from the exterior, looked liked nothing more than a small closet, but in reality was quite large. A person could stretch out on the floor and lay down there if they desired, that is if they didn't mind the ever-present odor of cleaning supplies.

  I was squatting down picking up the million-and-a-half paper towels I had just dropped when I heard voices. The stockroom door fancied itself a self-closing model but it wasn't up to the job and consequently it was slig
htly open. From my undetectable hiding place, I could easily hear any conversation being held in the bathroom. Being a firm believer in minding my own business, I always heard a lot of conversation, I just didn't usually listen, until I heard a somewhat familiar voice say, “Ian,” which captured my attention. It sounded like Ian's art student girlfriend!

  "... and he is going to marry me. Do you think he will find out its not his? His family is loaded!"

  "I don't see how he would find out unless the baby totally doesn't look like him. I'd say you hit the jackpot on that one Elease!"

  "He's such a gentleman, except for the part where he cheated on his girlfriend for eight months. He won't do that to me! I'm going to have to slow it down with Juan and Frank though."

  "I would hope so. Honestly, how do you keep them all straight?"

  "I don't say their names. I say, 'Oh, you,' because I can't remember who I'm with when it's dark.'

  I stared through the door crack as Elease and the unidentified girl laughed and walked out of the bathroom.

  Once they were gone, I caught myself gasping for air, my breathing coming out in a rush. I had unconsciously been holding it in. I leaned against the wall, dizzy from both the lack of air and the news.

  The baby wasn't Ian's!

  I had to tell someone! Fast!

  I waited a couple of antsy minutes to make sure Elease and her friend wouldn't see me come out the bathroom, then once in the hallway, I darted into the kitchen.

  I stood next to the sink, jumping up and down, which was where Kurt found me.

  "Mia, what is wrong with you?" Kurt looked at me like I was going crazy.

  "Oh my God!" My voice croaked in a level barely above a stage whisper. "I just heard something!"

  "What? What? Tell me!" Kurt was flapping his hands at me trying to get me to talk faster.

  "Well, I was in the bathroom, and I heard Elease, you know, Ian's art student, and she was talking to some girl. She is cheating on him with two other guys! She said the baby isn't Ian's. And she thinks Ian's family is rich! That is so far from the truth! He must have lied to her."

  "I just waited on those two. They are sitting near the window," Kurt said, clearly shocked.

  I peered out the kitchen door. Sure enough, there were Elease and some girl sitting at a table by the window, still laughing. Apparently they had no idea I was in the bathroom closet and overheard them.

  "Oh my God! What should I do?"

  Kurt looked indignant. "Nothing. You are not going to do anything. Screw that asshole! He cheats on you, humiliates you, asks these outrageous favors of you: he deserves what he gets!"

  "I have not been the model girlfriend since I have been cheating on him too." I suddenly felt guilty.

  "The way I look at it is he made you do the things you did. If you were happy would you be cheating on him?"

  "No." Ian wasn't a bad guy; he really didn't deserve this fate. Nobody deserved this. He seemed like he really loved Elease, too.

  Kurt was firm. "If you tell him, he will hate you, even if you are right. First he will think you are vindictive and a liar. Then he will pity you even more. How awful! Maybe he won't even care!"

  Kurt had a point. Why would Ian even listen to me? He would think I was jealous and trying to get him back. If he loved this girl, he probably stopped loving me a long time ago, but used me anyway. I couldn't save him.

  ”Okay. You're right. I won't say anything. I will wait and see what happens."

  Kurt hugged me, not before he looked around first to see if anyone saw us. "It will be okay. These things always work themselves out."

  “Thanks.” I was somewhat mollified by his reasoning.

  We went back out to the counter and I tried to make myself busy wiping the equipment down with a rag and trying not to stare at Elease. You can't un-know something and it was impossible to not keep looking at her. What was she thinking? Why did she think what she was doing was a good idea?

  Else didn't seem to notice me staring at her, but before she and her friend left, she came up to the counter.

  "Mia, I just want to thank you for being so nice and giving Ian up without a fight." Her smile was broad and I thought I detected a touch of self-satisfaction in her eyes.

  I must have looked aghast, unable to speak. Then I felt Kurt brush my elbow and I found my voice.

  "It just wasn't meant to be between us, that's all. I can see how happy you two are and I wish you both the best of luck," I said, not really smiling at her. No matter, her's was a hollow victory.

  Elease patted her washboard-flat stomach. "Thanks. From all of us." With that she turned and walked out of the Garden.

  I thought I was going to throw up.

  I turned and looked at Kurt. "Can you believe that shit? Incredible,” I said, shaking my head.

  "It is unbelievable."

  "I wonder whose baby it is?"

  "Who knows? She sounds like she was looking for the best deal."

  "In this day and age? Who ever heard of a woman trapping a man anymore? How very 1950s. She is also under the delusion that Ian’s family is rich. Not by a long shot."

  " People are nuts." Kurt changed the subject. "Mia, I must see you tonight. Let's go out."

  I began to answer when a familiar voice said my name. I turned to see John Armiss, my art history professor from college standing at the counter.

  “Hi Mia. How are you?”

  I smiled at him.

  “Hi Professor Armiss. Good. How are you?”

  “Good. Did you apply for that curatorial assistant position at the museum?”

  “Uh no.” I had totally forgotten about it. And besides, I didn’t want to leave Kurt.

  “Well I know for a fact that they haven’t hired anyone yet.”

  For an instant I didn’t know what to say. I was annoyed that he kept bringing it up whenever I saw him.

  “I will. I have been working crazy hours and haven’t had the chance.” I smiled at him again. “Can I use you as a reference?”

  “Of course you can.”

  “Thank you. What can I get you?”

  “I’ll take a half-caf cappuccino.”

  I nodded, rang up his order, took his money and turned to Kurt who was standing at my elbow. “Half-caf cappuccino. You weren’t leaving yet were you?” I raised my brow at him. He shot me playful look.

  “I leave when you leave,” he said, his voice low. I could feel his breath on my neck. I smiled at him as he went to the espresso machine. I turned back to see John staring at me.

  “So, what does the job entail?” I asked him, more to make conversation than any real need to hear about it.

  “It is a contract position for a year and you get a hands on look at what a curator does.”

  “A year?” I was skeptical. That was it? I could go there and ultimately end up back at the Garden.

  “Yes, it is a nice transition to graduate school. You have experience in the field and you are paid for your efforts without having to work for free as an intern.”

  Graduate school? I had no plans to go to graduate school.

  “Here’s your half-caf cappuccino,” Kurt said, handing the cup to John.

  “Thanks. Apply Mia. It’s a good move.”

  I nodded but didn’t say anything.

  John turned and walked out the door. I turned to Kurt who was scowling at me.

  “Who the fuck does he think he is? Why is he always trying to get you to quit?”

  I laughed. “He is just being a nice guy,” I said.

  “Yeah, well I think he has an ulterior motive,” Kurt said.

  “Not everyone wants to sleep with me.” I laughed.

  “Well I do. Do you want to go out for a drink?”

  “Yes I do.” I smiled at Kurt and looked down at my watch. It was almost time to leave for the day. Hannah and the evening crew would be coming in soon and I was ready to leave the Garden in my rearview and get someplace alone with Kurt.

  The best thing about Ian an
d I breaking up was the fact that now Kurt and I could go to my house, I thought while I watched him get dressed later that night. He had to get home before Hannah came home. I told myself it was okay because I needed a lot of room to sleep anyway. I don't think I convinced myself.

  Chapter 8

  Like I said, I really didn't have many friends who are girls. Maybe Amy, but she had been acting really weird lately. Not speaking, hiding in her room, not coming home. I think something was up with her, but have been unable to ask her. I have barely seen her since that talk I had with her about her and Rick. I wanted to tell her what was happening with Ian and everything, but she was missing in action. As a result, I didn't ask her to go with me to see Noah. But I didn't want to go alone because I would look desperate. So, I asked Sarah from work. She was fun and smart, maybe a little easy, but hey, who isn't?

  Besides, I wasn't really looking for anything to happen, I just wanted to see Noah and his band, although Serena would probably be there. But that was okay with me, for now.

  Liquor agents have closed Marty’s Lounge more than it has been open, due to the rampant underage drinking. Located near the river in Toledo, the bar, although on a main street, is close to a neighborhood. Understandably, the people living in these houses complain constantly about the noise. You would too if people were peeing on the side of your house every night.

  With the right band in the place, though, it's fun. There are two sides: a room with a stage, a bar with tables, plus an outdoor patio. I spent a lot of time drinking on the outdoor patio when I was in college.

  On event night, Sarah and I found a table near the back before the place filled up. I had wanted to scope out the scene first, before I approached Noah. Also, I wanted to see him and Serena interact before they saw me to gauge how strong their relationship was. It was my version of relationship strategy. If they weren’t solid, I would swoop in and pick up the pieces of Noah’s broken heart.

  I didn't have to wait long. Noah walked in shortly thereafter holding Serena's hand, keeping it close to his chest. He looked around, as if to challenge anyone who dared look at her. He was both insecure and defiant all at once. It was fascinating. I wanted going to go up and say hi, but his demeanor was off-putting.