Know Your Roll

by Matthew Siege

  That was a kick in the head. “You mean I’m supposed to be telling the Dregs about this place?”

  “Yes.”

  “But they’re…” I glanced at Patch, who was watching me. “Well… Hopeless.”

  She nodded. “So now you know your task, questgiver. Get your butt down there and give them some hope.”

  THE BRAWL OF THE MOUNTAIN KING

  begins in

  2 days - 13 hours - 53 minutes - 3 seconds

  “And fast,” she added.

  “When you’re ready to go, follow the lights. I’ll go and make some popcorn for Patch,” Source said, withdrawing his camera into the ceiling.

  Patch was smiling up at the spot into which he’d retreated. “I’ll talk him into lighting up the levels we have access to while you’re gone. Who knows, I might even have drawn up a decent blueprint of the place by the time you come back. You are coming back, right?”

  “Of course. Do you want me to Pinky Swear?”

  “Nah. I trust you. Besides, I don’t think it’d be fair to tie you to Bingo and an unbreakable vow at the same time.”

  I looked at the our third wheel, who was currently trying to claw his way into a steel-plated console set into the floor, sniffing loudly through his mask and croaking, “Here coolant, coolant, coolant,” to himself.

  “Actually,” I said, “how about you go?”

  “Very funny. We both know that you do way better in Hallow than me. Always have. Remember the first night I found out about the curfew?”

  “You thought they were kidding. Even after they started chasing you around with torches and pitchforks, you mistook it for an ‘exuberant game of tag’.”

  “Yep.” She looked far too pleased with the memory. “And now there’s a wanted poster with a very bad likeness of me nailed to the wall of Sanguine’s Headquarters, the Post Office, and the Sheriff’s station.”

  “Along with almost every other building in Hallow.”

  She laughed. “And what about that time I went to the auctions and somehow got myself added to the lot I was bidding on? Classic Patch.”

  I shook my head. “You shouldn’t have even been there in the first place. Gearblin, Kobold, Gutter Imps; none of us Dregs can own anything worth selling anyway. You’d have gotten carted off for sure if I hadn’t dropped three pallets of Illgott’s Devil’s Brew from the rafters and followed it up with a string of fireworks.”

  “That was quite a blaze.”

  “Some of my best work, if I do say so myself.” I was getting wistful when what I needed to be getting was going. “All right, fine. I’ll supervise Bingo and do what I can to put Rule of Cool on the map.”

  “Great! And remember, you put me in charge of procuring, so no second-guessing and backseat credit-spending when you return.”

  “Deal.” I took the dagger out of my belt and flipped it, pressing the handle into her hand. “Take this, just in case something happens while I’m gone.”

  “What about you?”

  “I’ll find something better.”

  “Don’t forget, okay?”

  I nodded. “Hey, if I can show the Dregs that Rule of Cool has something for them, the Heroes might not be too happy. It could get dangerous, like kicking a stingfly’s nest. Maybe I could get a goodbye ki-”

  My Hero-off-to-war ploy was cut short by a hideous screech of metal as Bingo finally tore the panel he’d been working on free from the floor. She and I watched in amazement as he dove headfirst into what appeared to be vital components, yanking hoses free of their couplings and desperately putting the broken ends to his mouth so that he could suck the contents down his throat.

  “If I don’t take Bingo,” I said, as Patch gave me an ‘I told you so’ look, “he’ll wreck the place worse than if the Heroes got in.”

  Chapter 14

  The tunnels were dark, but motion sensors and Source’s attention combined to light our way with countless small lights mounted flush with the ceiling. It looked like the computer could change the color, alter the brightness, and make the illumination pulse in a given direction as a visual guide.

  Bingo and I were following a series of flowing blue orbs now, and whenever I slowed to mark the wall with a piece of chalk I’d found on the ground the shine waited for us to catch up instead of carrying on.

  “What ya doin’?” Bingo grunted, as I made yet another ‘X’ just before and just after the lights led us left through a three-way intersection.

  “Making sure we can find our way back.”

  “D.T.A. Good. Mistrust’s da only trust I trust. Dat ‘puter’s already failed me once.”

  “How so?” Source’s eyes were obviously on us, and I figured his ears were too. If Bingo wanted to divulge though, I wasn’t going to stop him.

  “Bastard trapped me in ‘ere!”

  “You mean you fell down a chimney like we did.”

  “Flue.”

  “Whatever.”

  He glared up at the corner of a metal support beam, and I saw a camera there. “Somet’in’ like dat.”

  I pointed at the mark I’d made on the wall. “Well, this is more for my peace of mind. If something does happen to Source, I’d rather not get stuck down here without anything other than happenstance and wild guesses to lead us back.”

  “I noticed ya said ‘us’.”

  “Yeah, well, if I don’t bring you back I’ll have to throw myself down the damn flue again to get back in here, since Source probably won’t open the door to whatever exit we’re about to use.”

  “Would ya do dat, for her?”

  “Sure.”

  He narrowed his eyes at me. “It’s all talk ‘til ya make da leap. Still, I mighta been wrong about ya.”

  “And that,” I informed him, “is the nicest thing you’ve said to me since we met.”

  He chuckled, the gas mask’s speakers twisting the sound even more and knocking the wind right out of my sails. “Wasn’t ‘sposed ta be compliment, boyo. I’d still wager that ya don’t got the grit required to deserve her.”

  I ignored him. I didn’t have to prove anything to this drunk. Who did this wobbly-walking, barely talking mobile distillery think he was? If there was a plan it’d come from me, though now that I was saddled with his unsought-after company I was going to have to find a way to include him in it.

  I turned and kept heading in the direction of the lights. We walked in silence for a little, other than the rasp of his mask and the scuff of our boots. “When we get to Hallow, follow my lead,” I told him eventually.

  “Doubt it.”

  “Have it your way. Just remember that it’s been a long time since you’ve been in the city. A lot’s changed.”

  He gave me a ghost of a nod. “No *shhhh*it.”

  “I doubt the inhabitants that matter will have missed you, so don’t get pissed off if you don’t receive glad hands and warm embraces from Mother or the other oldies.”

  “Mother’s still alive, eh?”

  “Death’s gonna have to sneak up on her, and he hasn’t had the guts to yet. Come to think of it, was the VC around when you got trapped?”

  “Da what?”

  “The Vigilance Committee.”

  “No.”

  “Well, they are now. They’re jerks who blame the Dregs for their issues. Shiny armor and chips on their shoulders. Steer clear of them if you see them. They don’t put up with what they used to, and they never let much slide in the first place. Worse, the Platform is funneling more Heroes in every day, so Hallow’s crawling with judgmental, holier-than-thou, how-dare-you-breathe-the-same-air-as-me do-gooders.”

  He glanced at me, gas mask working overtime as his breathing picked up the pace. “Never shoulda reversed dat damn t’ing.”

  “I thought the Heroes did that.”

  “Da *shhht*ucking Marketers did it, to bring ‘em in. One-way ticket to da the mountain for da big reveal.”

  “The reveal of what? Why so mysterious?”

  “No point in sayin�
�, ‘less we can free her.”

  “There’s that ‘her’ stuff, and it was ‘baby’ earlier. If we’re talking about a person, how can you be so sure she’s still alive?” This guy had survived down here for a long time on his own, so why couldn’t someone else?

  “She never got da chance ta live. I need ya ta help me change dat.”

  I didn’t know what to say to that, so I shut up. The light led us down another long tunnel, at the end of which we went right. I could see the marks of thousands of tools on the walls to either side of us. These had probably been productive mines once, though every scrap of available ore appeared to have been harvested long ago.

  Bingo licked his finger and dragged it along the wall, then tugged his gas mask briefly to one side and pressed whatever he’d collected into his mouth between his cheek and his teeth. “Mostly tin and iron,” he reported, “along with silver and gold. Dey were chasin’ Mechronite. See dere?” He pointed at a side tunnel that ramped off to our right into the darkness. “Dat’s where da seam went. Back in da day, nothin’ more valuable.”

  “Never heard of it.”

  “Dat ‘sposed ta concern me? Dey mined all dey were allowed to, if ya believe da ore scryers.”

  “What’s so great about it?”

  “Everything. For da weight it’s stronger den it should be, an’ it holds enchantment forever. Improves Alchemy across da board, and readily ‘ssimilates freshly installed components; no muss, no fuss. All dat’s zero and zilch compared ta its best trait. When ya put enough of it next ta another metal for long enough, da stuff’ll spread. ‘Fore ya know it, it’s all Mechronite.”

  “Wow. Sounds like it’d be pretty hard to run out.”

  Bingo harrumphed. “Dat’s da sorta restraint it’s easy ta pretend ya got and harder ta have. Corporation had greater need den patience. ‘Twas a strat that worked great, until it didn’t.”

  I was impressed. “Rule of Cool sounds like it used to be a class act. Except for the end, of course.”

  “Dead an’ gone now, boyo. Nothin’ left of it but me, you and da girl.”

  “So I’m told.” I made another mark on the wall near where he’d tasted the stone and we kept going. When we took a left at the next split I did it again, and then turned to look at him as we kept walking. “Did you use to mine?”

  “We didn’t get a choice. Hunting Mechronite, ‘member?”

  “Where you any good at it?”

  “I was.” I heard his raspy breathing hissing though the gas mask. Just when I thought that was going to be the end of it, he said, “Best time of my life. I liked da quiet. Nobody to jabber at ya. Just da rockface and da pickax swing.”

  Subtle… “I don’t think I talk too much, just for the record.”

  “‘Course ya don’t. Yet you’re still jawin’ at me…”

  He won that exchange right there, since there wasn’t much I could say to that without further proving him right. Despite that, letting him have the last word turned out to be beyond me. “Maybe you’d do well to listen to what I’m saying old man, instead of getting irritated that I’m saying it.”

  “Not gonna ‘appen.”

  Ahead of us a door set into a much narrower part of the tunnel popped open on silent hinges. Bingo’s pace quickened, and I sprinted off ahead in response. Being downwind from him was bad news, and I wanted to be the first one out.

  Was that selfish? Maybe. I’d only been ‘trapped’ for a short time compared to his lengthy interment. He deserved a little free range fun more than I did, but if there were Heroes who’d queued early for the raid I wanted to spot them without having to rely on a Gearblin who was only thinking about getting to the bottom of his next bottle.

  Compared to the interior of the mountain, even the last of the day’s sun was bright. I shielded my eyes as I mounted the gradient that led away from the door and into the open.

  There were some Heroes on a few of the lower hills a mile or so away, and a couple of wagons moving back into Hallow with the noobs who didn’t want to spend the night in tents. Tangling with them wouldn’t be a good idea, but they’d be easy to avoid. I hadn’t gotten into a fight since I’d gained Hero status, but Bingo was a Dreg and thus a tremendous liability.

  Normally I thought fresh air was overrated, but the breeze that washed across my face brought with it the familiar stink of ‘Neath.

  I turned around and watched the door we’d used to exit the tunnel. It was so cunningly camouflaged that when it snapped shut behind Bingo I lost sight of it for a second.

  Decipher (Visual) Roll

  Cunning Modifier: +3

  Roll: 9 + 3 = 12

  Situational Modifier (Location of Hidden Object Known): +4

  New Aggregate: 12 + 4 = 16

  Result: Success

  I knew that the right thing to do was to bring him all the way back around to Konami Rock and guide him up to the peak using the code. I couldn’t be sure that the Hero thing would work on him, but it wasn’t fair to take him into Hallow without preparing him as much as I could.

  Bingo was standing rigid, the sunset painting the ground orange as he looked down on our surroundings. There was a worrying mix of awe and terror on his face.

  “Come on,” I told him. “I know you’re going through some hardcore PTSD, but I need you to come with me to Konami Rock. I’ve got a surprise for you.”

  The wind changed, and he shivered. “Too late for dat, boyo.”

  “There’s still enough light. Besides, I know the way by heart. The dark won’t stop us.”

  “Look,” he said, and I followed the thrust of his blunt finger. He was pointing at the first of the wagons, so close to Hallow by now that the wheels were churning up dust.

  Proficiency Check

  Investigation: 28

  Result: Success

  New Skill Values:

  Investigation = 32/100

  Now that I leaned in and stared, I could just make out a familiar figure leading a few Heroes with digging tools. He hopped into the bed of the horse-drawn cart and lay his hand possessively on a big stone partially wrapped in sackcloth.

  Warwick had stolen Konami Rock…

  Chapter 15

  “Never mind,” I said to Bingo, stunned that the Paladin had beaten me to the punch. I’d been planning on using the lure of Hero status as an easy way to get the Dregs on my side, thus earning enough for Patch to buy every mountain upgrade that Source had to offer. “I guess I don’t have a surprise for you, after all…”

  It was my fault. It had to be. Somehow Warwick had worked out what Patch’s paper meant and taken the stone, which meant that I couldn’t make any more Dregs into Heroes.

  Unless I could. Maybe Konami Rock simply marked the starting place, and the code would work anyway. “Come with me,” I told him. “We’re going to climb the mountain and see if we can turn you into somebody useful.”

  “Nope.”

  “What? Why not?”

  Bingo just grunted. The ever-present storm above ‘Neath was much more interesting to him than the artifact we’d just lost. The Rift always dropped the best stuff toward the middle of the storm, where the meme farms dominated the gathered squalor.

  “What is dat?” he asked, eyeing the Rift warily. “Stinks like magic.”

  “That’s the Rift I was talking about earlier. The Heroes magic broke the world a little, and stuff from other places pours in through the hole they made.”

  “And dat?” Now the ‘Neath slums beneath the Rift had caught his attention.

  “That’s where the Dregs live.”

  He frowned. “You keep usin’ dat word. What’s a ‘Dreg’?”

  “Did we get called something different, back when you first got stuck in there? A Dreg is a Me, or a Patch, or a Kobold or a Gnoll or a You. Dregs don’t matter to the Heroes, and we learn fast to stay out of their way.”

  His bloodshot eyes narrowed. “What happens if ya don’t?”

  “Really?”

  Bingo nodded.r />
  “They kill us, obviously. Or they chain us to a desk and make us do something they need, if we’ve managed to acquire a skill they can’t or won’t do for themselves. Life in Hallow is hard, and only a handful of us are brave or bold or stupid enough to live through it.”

  We were halfway down the mountain, but there were still a few elevated peaks between us and Hallow. He was so interested in the town that I led him down the long way, guiding him west through the darkening woods and up the last rise between us and our destination.

  Maybe if he got the lay of the land, I could trust him not to get us both killed tonight.

  After a couple of minutes we were looking down on Dockside, the part of Hallow that butted up against the water. A couple of blocks away from it was Welldark, and closer to the middle was where the merchants and the Heroes’ housing was, and then Sanguine’s Headquarters and the Fraternity’s temple.

  “It has changed,” Bingo hissed once we were up there. He sounded shaken. His mask let a tremble through.

  “Not for the better, I take it?”

  “No.”

  “What was it like the last time you were here?”

  “Don’t matter,” he snarled, though I got the feeling he was angry at himself and not me. I caught him wiping at his eyes with his thumbs as he shivered in place and shook his head to clear it, his mohawk as stiff as ever. “You shoulda said it’d be like dis.”

  “I didn’t know it’d be such a shock. How could you not know anything about Dregs and ‘Neath and the Rift?” I should have anticipated this, since his brain must’ve been so addled from the coolant he’d been sucking for decades that he’d lost a lot of his memories.

  I felt bad for him despite myself, especially when I saw his wary gaze tracing some of the roads into Hallow and squinting at the looming buildings glistening in the sunset. We had to sneak through most of that stuff if I was going to vandalize some high-visibility targets, and I could tell that he was already getting overwhelmed.

  “Time for me to go make some mischief,” I said. “Why don’t you wait here while I see what sort of trouble I can get into?”