The OUT OF LINE Series

by Jen McLaughlin

  I don’t want him. I want you.

  And what had I said to her? I’d told her to spend her time with Cory instead of me. It was better this way. The right thing to do. She would move on to someone more suitable, and I would be safe from ruining everything for Dad’s retirement. It’s not like I needed to hang out with her to watch over her. That had been my first mistake—trying to become her friend. The second had been kissing her. And the third?

  Wanting more from her than grade school kisses.

  I banged my head back against the wall. “Idiot.”

  Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I powered it on. It had been off since Friday night, and I was sure I’d have a waiting text or a thousand from the senator. No sooner did the Apple icon disappear from the screen than my phone buzzed.

  Everything okay over there? Have you seen her tonight?

  I rolled my eyes. Just walked in. Haven’t gone out yet.

  Do so and report back.

  Yes, sir.

  Apparently my time to sit around moping had come to an end. Duty called, and I couldn’t ignore it. After making quick work of changing out of my uniform, I opened the door and headed out to search for Carrie. It’s not like I could text her and ask what she was doing. I’d kind of ended that aspect of our friendship the minute I rejected her and acted like an ass.

  I’d have to go over to the dorms and see if I could find her. It was five thirty, so chances were she’d be out and about. Maybe at the library. Probably with Cory. Making golden fucking plans for a golden fucking future.

  The whole ride over to the school grounds, I was tense and strung out. I wasn’t ready to see her with Cory. To see what I’d orchestrated. I pulled the bike up to the curb and took off my helmet. After scouring the library, I came up empty. Everywhere else on campus turned out empty too, but then it occurred to me what day it was.

  Sunday. She was probably helping out at the soup kitchen. Alone.

  Son of a bitch.

  I jumped back on my bike and took the quickest route to the local shelter. By the time I arrived, the sun was down and I had every intention of hiding in the shadows of the parking lot. Once she got in a cab, I could tell her dad she was fine. But as I pulled up on my bike, she walked out the door. She was pale and her hair was frizzy. Huge bags were under her eyes, making her look exhausted. A family came out of the soup kitchen at the same time as her, and Carrie handed them three gift cards.

  The family hugged her and she hugged them back. Carrie watched them walk away with a smile on her face. Once she was alone, she stepped under the streetlight and I saw a thin sheen of sweat covering her skin. She’d worked too hard tonight. Then again, she always did, especially when it came to helping others.

  As she reached into her pocket to grab her phone, I swore I saw a shadowy shape move behind her, but it could have been a trick of the light. I tried to sink back into the shadows before it was too late and she spotted me, but she turned my way. At first, she didn’t see me, but I knew the exact second she spotted me. Her nostrils flared and she gave me her back. Clearly, she planned on pretending she hadn’t seen me.

  When she pulled out her phone and started texting or calling someone, I hesitated before I walked up to her. “Hi.”

  “Are we surprising each other now? I didn’t realize we were there,” she murmured, still not looking up at me.

  Okay. I deserved that. Maybe we weren’t supposed to be friends anymore, but I could at least apologize for my bad behavior. “I’m sorry I lost it the other night.”

  “It’s fine.”

  She still didn’t look at me. I shifted on my feet and scanned the dark alley behind her. I couldn’t get rid of this uneasy gut feeling that something was back there. “No, it’s not.”

  Finally, she lifted her head. “You’re right. It’s not, but if nothing else, I now know exactly how you feel about me. So thanks for that.”

  “No, you really don’t.” I ran a hand through my hair. “I don’t even know how I feel most of the time.”

  “Well, good for you.”

  Yeah. She was pretty pissed at me. Well, I’d been pissed at her too. “Thanks, Ginger.”

  She stiffened. “Don’t call me that.”

  “Or what? You’ll kiss me into submission again?”

  The glare she gave me should have turned me into nothing more than a pile of ashes. Instead, it made my whole body quicken with excitement. I liked when she played hard to get, damn it. “Go away.”

  “And leave you standing here all alone in the worst section of the city?” I snorted. “Yeah. Not happening. Where’s your cab?”

  “Late.” She walked past me, her shoulder bumping into my arm. It was probably supposed to be a shoulder bump, but she was too damned short to pull it off effectively. “If you won’t take the hint, then I’ll leave you.”

  I fell into step beside of her, my hands in my pockets. This wasn’t a good section of the city, and she was playing stupid games. I thought I heard a footstep behind us and spun, ready to protect Carrie, but nothing was there. When I turned around, Carrie had an eyebrow raised and an amused expression on her face.

  “Chasing shadows?”

  “In this section of town, it’s probably not a shadow.” I searched the darkness, certain someone or something was out there. “Let’s go. Now.”

  “Not with you.”

  There it was again. A footstep. A shuffle. I grabbed her elbow. “This is an even stupider move than kissing me. You looking to get robbed or worse?”

  She broke free and stumbled backward. “I’m looking to get rid of you.”

  “Well, newsflash. Storming off in the worst section in San Diego isn’t the way to do it.” I reached for her, but she skirted out of my reach again. “Get on my bike, and I’ll drop you off.”

  “Not happening.” She tried to step around me, but I blocked her again. She stomped her foot. Actually stomped her foot. “Get out of the way!”

  “No. We need to leave. Now.”

  Something fell in the alley behind us, clattering against the pavement. Carrie seemed oblivious to the threat, but I wasn’t. My entire body knew a fight was coming, and I wanted Carrie far, far from it. A shadow moved behind her as my worst nightmare came to life. A man wearing a black ski mask and a pair of black gloves appeared seemingly out of thin air, holding a knife to her throat.

  “No quick movements,” he rasped, his eyes on me.

  I held up my hands and surveyed the rest of the shadows. Nothing else moved. It looked like the mugger was working alone. “Easy now. We’re not fighting back.”

  Carrie’s eyes went wide, and her face ghostly white. “Finn?”

  “Just do as he says,” I said, keeping my voice calm and soothing, while inside I was ready to rip off this asshole’s face piece by piece. The man pressed the knife against Carrie’s white skin and I saw red. Lots and lots of fucking red. My heart pounded in my head, and my whole body braced for a fight. “Let go of her right now.”

  The man laughed. Fucking laughed. “Give me all of your money and jewelry, and I’ll think about it. Now.”

  “Finn,” Carrie said, her voice soft. I could tell she was seconds from panicking, and if she panicked, there was no telling what this man would do.

  “Look at me.” When she followed my command, I saw the fear deep in the depths of her blue eyes. It was like pure acid in my stomach. I didn’t want to see her look at me like that ever again. I didn’t drop Carrie’s gaze, making sure I looked calm and collected for her. “Do what he says, babe. It’ll be okay.”

  She fumbled with the bracelet on her wrist, her fingers slipping on the clasp. Once she finally managed to get it off, she handed it to the man holding her. He snatched it up and shoved it in his pocket. Judging from the way he shook as he held Carrie, the money he earned from the sale of the bauble would go straight into his veins. Or up his nose.

  His unsteady hand made the knife slice Carrie’s throat. It was just a tiny scratch at best, but it made me rea
dy to make him bleed a hell of a lot more. “Let go of her.”

  “Once I’m done, you’ll get her back,” the man sneered. He pressed the knife even deeper into Carrie’s neck and a tiny trickle of blood rolled down her throat. “Money. Now.”

  I wanted to throttle the piece of shit. Now. But I knew I had to set the scene right. I needed to get the threat away from Carrie before I made my move. Then it was game fucking on. The asshat wouldn’t know what hit him.

  “Here you go,” I said.

  I took a wad of cash out of my pocket and held it out, waving it around just out of reach. The fucker reached for it, but couldn’t quite touch. He extended his arm, letting the knife fall away from Carrie’s throat. Bingo. Just what I’d wanted.

  Moving so fast the man never saw it coming, I captured his wrist and spun it behind his back. The knife clattered to the ground and Carrie leapt back from it, her eyes wider than ever before. Yanking the guy’s arm up behind his shoulders, I kept a firm pressure on him. I wrapped my forearm around the guy’s neck in a chokehold, squeezing tight enough to knock the guy out but not kill him.

  No matter how tempting it might be.

  “Come near her again, and next time you won’t wake the fuck up,” I snarled in his ear, fury making it hard to keep my grip loose. The thief tried to break free, but went limp in my arms. I let him drop to the ground and took the bracelet out of the guy’s hand, then shoved the cash back in my pocket too. “Let’s go now.”

  Carrie nodded quickly, taking my hand when I offered it. Neither one of us spoke as we climbed on the bike, helmets on and tension high. She clung to me, so I could feel her entire body shaking. Trembling. She might be in shock. I didn’t know if the shock was from my quick reaction to the robber, or the robber himself.

  Either way, it wasn’t good.

  I choked the throttle, speeding down the PCH to my apartment. When we got there, I hopped off the bike and yanked off my helmet. After helping her to her feet, I gently removed hers. She looked at me, not touching me but not moving away either.

  “Why did you bring me here?” she asked.

  I looked around. Though I hadn’t thought it through, I’d brought her back to my place. Leaving her alone was out of the question right now. “I don’t want you to be alone tonight.”

  “Oh.” She took a shaky breath, her face still far too pale for my liking. “I’ll be fine. You don’t have to—”

  “I want to,” I said simply, making sure my tone left no room for arguments. Though I wanted to rail at her, scream at her, I swallowed back my anger. Now was neither the time nor the place to release my frustrations at her actions.

  She didn’t say anything. Just swallowed hard and nodded.

  I brushed her hair out of her face tenderly and her eyes drifted shut. “Are you okay, Ginger?”

  “Where did you learn how to do that?” she asked, her voice tiny and soft. “It was…crazy.”

  “The Marines,” I said, swallowing past the huge lump in my throat threatening to choke me. So, she was scared of me now. Fucking fabulous. “You know I would never hurt you, right?”

  She bit her lip and latched gazes with me. I couldn’t read the emotions in her eyes. Fear maybe? “Of course.”

  “I’m sorry you had to see that.” I hugged her tight, resting my head on hers and breathing in her scent. “But I’m not sorry I did it. He could have…you could have…”

  She gripped my sides, fisting my shirt, and my stomach clenched. “I know.”

  Seeing that man holding a knife to her throat had done weird things to my insides. I’d be a fool to deny she meant something to me. Something real and huge and unstoppable. Like a force of nature, only stronger. How much longer could I push her away? How many times could I deny the feelings that were so clearly there before I gave up trying?

  She shuddered and buried her face in my shirt. “Just take me up to your place, please.”

  Not trusting myself to speak right now, I swung her in my arms, carrying her up to my apartment. For once, she didn’t fight me. She just lay there, letting me cradle her in my arms. Once we were inside, I sat down on the couch with her still in my arms.

  I couldn’t hold it in anymore. “That’s was the stupidest, most stubborn, idiotic—”

  “I know.”

  “—thing I’ve ever seen you do.”

  “I know.”

  “And you will never, ever go there without me again. Understood?”

  She swallowed and nodded. “Yes.”

  Her easy acquiescence did nothing to soothe my temper. I needed a fight. Needed to make her see how stupid she’d been in storming off like that. “If I hadn’t been there—”

  “But you were,” she said quietly.

  “But if I wasn’t.” I tightened my arms around her, picturing all the horrible things that could have happened to her. All the gruesome things men liked to do to defenseless women like her. “Do you have any idea what it would do to me if you were hurt? I can’t even imagine—”

  She lifted her head and kissed me, shutting me up quite effectively. For once, I didn’t want to fight her off. Didn’t want to give a damn about my duties or expectations. Didn’t give a damn what kind of contract I’d signed that said I wasn’t allowed to touch her. For once, I…

  Didn’t want to stop.

  I held on to Finn as tight as I could, kissing him for as long as he would let me. At any minute, he would push me away and curse, but I didn’t care right now. After the scare in the street, and his even more impressive saving of my stupid butt, I couldn’t stop thinking about how it had felt with that knife to my throat. I hadn’t been as scared for myself as I had been for Finn when he went for that guy. I’d been terrified he would get hurt trying to save me.

  Frightened he would get stabbed or worse…die.

  All because I had to go and be a stubborn idiot who refused to leave with him. I knew better than to walk off into the dark city streets. Knew not to storm off in a huff when danger lurked nearby. My actions had put myself, and consequently, Finn, in danger. If he had been injured trying to save me, I never would have forgiven myself.

  I strained to get closer, but his hold on me didn’t allow me to move. He broke off the kiss and dropped his forehead on mine, taking a shaky breath. “I don’t want to stop, babe. I swear it. But you could be in shock…”

  “I’m not,” I said quickly, grabbing his hand and holding it to my cheek. “I’m fine. I want you so bad it hurts.”

  His jaw flexed, but I could see his answering need in his eyes. “I shouldn’t.”

  “You should.”

  “Carrie…” He closed his fingers on my hips, lifting me up and lowering me on his lap so I straddled him.

  “Oh my God.” His erection pressed against my core, making me moan. I entwined my hands behind his neck, the cool metal of his dog tags digging in to my skin. He hadn’t even taken them off before seeking me out. “You really should, Finn.”

  He made a long sound, half groan and half agreement. “I can’t fight this anymore. I don’t even want to.”

  And with that, he buried his hands in my hair and tugged me down, his mouth seeking mine. For that brief second, the time that our mouths hovered close to each other, I knew I hadn’t made a mistake in falling for him. I had fallen hard, and there was no going back.

  His lips touched mine and all thought fled. All I knew was Finn was kissing me, and things finally felt right. And this time when he kissed me, he held nothing back. I knew it from the way his lips moved over mine. His mouth devoured mine hungrily, and he arched up against me, letting his erection rub where I needed him most. I dug my fingernails into his shoulders, holding him closer.

  Begging him not to leave with my actions instead of my words. If he pulled away now, I didn’t think I would recover. If he stopped now, I just might break. But he didn’t. Instead, he stood up and cupped my butt, holding me in place as he headed toward the bedroom. Slowly, he lowered me to his bed, never breaking off the kiss.r />
  My head spun as his lips worked mine, making everything but him disappear from my mind. The way he kissed me. How amazing his hands felt on my body. The feel of the soft bed underneath my back, contrasting with his hard body on top of mine. Pressing me down and making me want more.

  Tentatively, I ran my fingers down his back, sliding them up his shirt when I reached the hem. His hot skin burned my fingers, and the way he moaned into my mouth set me afire. I traced my nails down his spine, growing bolder the lower I went. When I reached the waistband of his shorts, I scraped my nails against his lower back.

  He hissed and tore his mouth from mine. “Are you sure you want this?”

  Unable to talk, I nodded and reached for him again. He stretched and ripped his shirt off over his head, and then melded his mouth back to mine. His free hand, with the other firmly on my hip, roamed all over. My sides. My stomach. My neck. When he traced the curve of my breast, I gasped into his mouth and arched my back.

  He needed to do that again.

  Apparently I said that out loud. He chuckled. “I will.”

  “Please,” I whimpered.

  Slowly, he crept my shirt over my stomach, stopping at the bottom of my bra. I caught my breath, afraid to move. Afraid if I made a sound, he would grow a conscience again and stop doing those magical things to me. He met my eyes, his own hot and unwavering. “Have you kissed Cory again?”

  “W-What?” I asked, caught off guard.

  “Since you kissed me, have you kissed him?” he asked, his jaw ticking.

  I shook my head. “No. Of course not. Just the once.”

  “Good.” He lifted my shirt a little bit more, his fingers brushing my bare skin, never dropping my gaze. “You’re mine now. Don’t forget it.”

  I swallowed hard at the possessiveness in his tone. I should argue or say I didn’t belong to any man. Assert my independence. But right now? Right here? I was his. One hundred percent his, and perfectly happy to be there. “I won’t. Now kiss me again.”

  He took off my shirt the rest of the way and closed his mouth over mine. As he worked his magic with his tongue, his fingers toyed with the strap of my bra, tugging gently. Before I could even blink, he had the strap undone and was lowering the tiny scrap of fabric off my breasts. For a second, I worried he might not like what he saw. Worried I would disappoint him somehow.