The Goblin Queen and the Sigil of Altazan (The League of Sinister Means Book 2)

by H. K. MacTavish

  “What made you change your minds?”

  “Life,” I say.

  “Life?”

  Ugh. I don’t want to talk about it.

  “It’s not important.”

  “Who am I going to tell? I’m your prisoner.”

  He…he’s right.

  “Our homes were destroyed by a warlord. Branok the Black. It was then that we learned two things. One, our ice magic can’t do everything. And two, the world was run by the strong. If we wanted something, we needed to take it! We needed soldiers to command if we were to actually become queens. So, we are not Ice Queens. But we are still queens. With soldiers! My sister likes her skeletal soldiers and I like my goblins. Usually.”

  “The world doesn’t work like that,” Gerald says. “The strong don’t always rule and take what they want.”

  “Of course they do. You didn’t come to my door and ask me to return the peasants. I took them because asking would have been met with defiance. Just as you knew when you came knocking that I would not have handed the peasants back to you. I took the peasants. You wanted to take them back so you are here to take them. By force. You live by that simple rule of life, just like me. Just like Branok the Black.”

  “No. We are different. We fight to protect the weak.”

  “The weak aren’t to be protected. They are to be used! You want to protect them from me and then what? Are you going to protect them from another army? Another villain? What if they can’t pay their taxes? Are you going to save them from taxation? If a lord drags them off to fight his wars, are you going to rescue them from the lords and ladies of the realms or are you going to let them die because someone who had better parents wants more wealth and power?”

  “The world isn’t that cold.”

  “The world is exactly that cold.”

  “I have seen happiness, and light, and warmth from everyone.”

  “Please,” I say while I roll my eyes. Does he expect me to believe that?

  “It’s true,” he says. “The world doesn’t have to work the way you’ve been shown.”

  “But it does. And I aim to be the one to control the strings of at least my little realm here. Here, I can do what I want. I pay no taxes, I have all the luxuries that I can get my little hands on, and I never have to bend a knee or my back to another. Though I have been known to curtsey to my sister.”

  “Someone will stop you. If it isn’t us, it will be someone else.”

  “Yes. Someone stronger than I am. I pray it isn’t those three marching towards me. It had better not be them! I’d like to think that I am better than that!”

  “It is too bad you can’t be shown any other way,” Gerald says.

  “I’ve seen the truth. My parents died, my friends died, all to a man that decided to take what he wanted. And then he rode off. And there was no cosmic balance! There was no karma. There was just me and my sister, alone, with our pathetic ice magic that could stop Branok the Black! Now, if you excuse me, I have to signal to the heroes to come over this way.”

  “How will you do it? I didn’t see a lot of wood or trees or anything flammable. How are you going to create a fire that they can see?”

  “I think I remember how to cast a light rune. It will be visible for a good distance away,” I say. “Now, behave yourself.”

  “What ever happened to Branok the Black?” Gerald asks.

  “He serves my sister,” I say. I turn and walk out of the room, past the cells, and to the front of the building.

  I stop! Right in front of me is one of those snakes. It looks like it is about to lunge at me and for a moment I can’t do anything. I’m too scared of dying! It’s me or that snake! I cast a spell summoning a spear of ice and impale the snake. It slides back, out of the doorway and into the street. They aren’t sturdy things, are they? They fall pretty easily to magic at least. Dwarves aren’t known for being strong in the way of magic.

  Hmm. What if that is the flaw of these things? Maybe with my magic to back them, my goblins will be able to clear this place out.

  I listen for more but I don’t hear anything. I don’t hear the heroes either. I step outside and look up above the doorway. It is large and flat and perfect for a rune. Near me is an old dwarven blade. I pick that up and reach above the door and scratch out the rune…does it go up and to the right or left? Let’s try right. And done!

  Nothing happens. Of course with a fifty-fifty chance I end up choosing wrong! That’s okay. I can just reach up and carve another rune beside it. This time I will draw the final line up and to the left. Continue tracing it around and…

  Ahh! I blink my eyes trying to see. I can’t see my fingers or the door. Wow. That…that is bright.

  I continue blinking my eyes as I reach for the doorway. One grab and I miss, nearly falling forward. I reach out with the other hand and take a hold of the handle. The heroes should see that rune and want to investigate. And I will be waiting for…ouch! Damn it! Rammed my shin into a bench. Fuck that hurts. Great. I’m limping again. When they get here I’ll be waiting for them!

  Hit my shin at just the right angle apparently. Fucking nine hells that hurt.

  Confrontations

  Those heroes are probably wearing a lot of enchantments. I laughed that Cassandra shouldn’t be able to walk like she does because her boots are enchanted but I bet that is the truth. All of their footwear is probably enchanted. Their belts, their weapons, everything. It isn’t a wonder anymore that they can continue so well against me without Gerald.

  Wait. Isn’t there a rune that can remove enchantments? No. But there is one that might help me. And I remember it!

  I pause and carve a rune on the side of the wall near the cells. Then I carve a couple of contact runes nearby on the floor.

  This rune should mask certain small enchantments for a brief time. Any little trinket or spell that is enhancing them in any, small, way should go away for a few minutes.

  I’ll stay away from any rune that goes boom. First, I don’t remember them. That is probably the most important reason. But more importantly, I did promise Gerald. And I don’t need the Safar siblings teaming up on me right now.

  I enter the court room again and I see Gerald up near the long judge’s bench and he is just standing there, waiting for me. He could have tried to attack me but hasn’t. He could also simply be waiting for his three companions to come to him and stab me in the back.

  If that happens I’ll make him regret it! My goblins will come to my rescue! They will burn that village to the ground when they rescue me!

  I should take Gerald’s holy symbol but I think I can trust him. Yes. I’ll let him have it. Besides, it would be so much better to let him watch as I defeat his sister and friends while he holds his holy symbol in his hand. That will be delicious to witness! Will he break his oath to me or will he stand there and watch what happens?

  “Is it done?” Gerald asks.

  “It is,” I say.

  “What happened out there?”

  “Oh, I killed a snake by the door.”

  “Is that why you were yelling?”

  “Oh. That. I…ran my shin into a bench. It’s nothing.”

  I feel like an idiot telling him I didn’t see a piece of furniture and walked right into it! He doesn’t seem to care though.

  “Will they be able to see the rune?”

  “They will,” I say.

  “If we…I mean my friends and my sister, if they end up winning, I will see to it that you are treated fairly,” Gerald says.

  “That is very kind of you,” I say.

  “I want you to see that even with the strength we have, we won’t use it to abuse you,” Gerald says.

  “That is nice of you to make such an offer. I will offer you something in return.”

  “Oh?”

  “If I win, I will treat you and your sister and your two friends well until I ransom the lot of you off.”

  “So you are going to ransom us.”

  “Yes. I sa
id I would. I’m not going to keep you as perpetual slaves or feed you to my goblins but I can’t just let you go. What would prevent you from trying again?”

  “What would ransoming us off do to prevent us from trying again?”

  “It would send a message. Let others know what happens if they try and invade my domain. And whoever pays your ransom might be able to persuade you from not doing it again. It will let everyone know that a group of heroes tried to attack me and they ended up getting their comeuppance!”

  “I still don’t think you’re using that word correctly.”

  “I believe I am. Oh! And the money of course.”

  “Of course,” Gerald says.

  “I don’t wander around beating up orcs and vampires, or whatever it is you heroes do to earn money. And goblins aren’t the greatest miners.”

  “You could enslave dwarves,” Gerald says.

  “I could, but slaves are so hard to handle with goblins. Just look at the trouble two peasants caused. And having dwarves to mine? Well, first I would have to find a vein of gold or silver and then I would have to keep a bunch of dwarves as prisoners…you can see where selling you off to a lord is easier.”

  “I was being sarcastic.”

  “Oh. Well it won’t work regardless,” I say.

  “How long do you think it will take for Katie, Leo, and Cassandra to arrive?” Gerald asks.

  “I hope soon. I’ve got my spell all ready, a few goblins…”

  “It’s all right to be nervous.”

  “I’m not scared,” I say.

  It is only by the grace of the gods that I am not shaking right now. Three against one. I’m not ready to count my goblins as assets. This could go badly for me.

  “Good,” Gerald says. He believes me. Now if I can just convince myself.

  No Vivian. You have this. You aren’t giving up! These heroes aren’t going to defeat me! Yes, I would have liked to have had my books with me. That chapter on Low Blows in Tabitha’s book would have been useful. And the protection spells in Mabh and Vashti’s book would have helped, especially with all the ice and cold I’ll be slinging about. Wait? Maybe I do remember the spells. Lorelei and I used to protect one another from ice and cold all the time. Oh, how did that one go? Was it like…no, no. That wasn’t it. Maybe…yes…yes! I think I have it! It will even help to protect my goblins from harsh blows. Ice hurts!

  Unless I’m missing part of the spell. I hope that isn’t the case. It should aid with any potential friendly fire I toss towards my goblins in my attempt to hit the heroes.

  Now I wait.

  That rune is bright. The heroes should see it easily. I start to pace.

  And I wait.

  In an ideal world I would have cast my Sigil of Altazan by now. I’ve been pacing for a while. I’ll just have a seat and rest. The heroes will be here soon. I’m sure of it.

  And I wait.

  This is getting boring.

  I yawn. What time is it? I look over and see Gerald nodding off. I should stay awake for a little bit.

  I put up a bright light rune. How can they miss it? Are they searching every building on the way? Maybe they fell into some snakes. I should scry on them. I’ll just ask…oh…Gerald is asleep. I shouldn’t have thrown that bowl. I’d still have water to scry with. If I wasn’t surrounded by incompetence and obstacles this wouldn’t have happened! I’ll just wait a bit longer.

  “Hey!” I yell to my goblins. They are starting to fall asleep. They are going to stay awake!

  “Sorry highness.”

  Yeah. They know what they did.

  Where are the heroes? They should have been here by now. Should I send out a goblin to see if the heroes are near? I only have four left.

  No. Goblins may not be much but four is better than three. I’ll hold off. Is Gerald still asleep? Maybe the heroes are all asleep. I should get some sleep in that case. I don’t want to fight the heroes without a little rest if they are rested. I stand up and walk over to the goblins.

  “You will stand guard here while I sleep. If the heroes come in, or snakes, you yell as loud as you can.”

  “Yes highness.”

  I walk back behind the stone judge’s bench and lay down. It is a hard floor but it is better than nothing. I close my eyes and…

  ..what? What was that?

  It’s a goblin screaming. Why are you screa…Shit! It’s a goblin screaming!

  I stand up, wiping some drool from the corner of my mouth and then I straighten out my dress. I look around and make sure that there aren’t any spiders or bugs on me.

  “Highness!” a goblin yells.

  “Are they here? Are the heroes here?” I ask stepping out from around the stone bench.

  “I think so,” Gerald says, sitting on one of the stone tables.

  I reach for my scroll of Icy Reception and…where is it? I look around me trying to find it. There! It fell out from my belt when I fell asleep. I pick it up and turn around. Gerald is walking towards me.

  “Yes?” I ask.

  “Remember our deal,” Gerald says.

  “Oh, I haven’t forgotten,” I say. “Have you?”

  “I’ll uphold my end until you don’t.”

  “Good.”

  Three against one is better than four against one with one of the four healing. Under no circumstances do I want Gerald getting involved. Especially after a rest! I wish I had thought of that earlier. Well, no sense in bitching about that now. I’m rested, Gerald is rested. Maybe the three about to attack are not rested. That would be fortuitous.

  “How far out are they?” I ask. I’m nervous. Can the goblins see me? Their queen, afraid? That is embarrassing.

  “Gerald?” Katie calls out.

  “They are inside,” a goblin says.

  Thanks for that useless information.

  “I’m back here,” Gerald calls out.

  “I thought no hindering me,” I say.

  “Sorry. This isn’t a big place. They would be here soon regardless,” Gerald says. “You had better cast that spell.”

  Yes, my spell. My last hope. I begin to read the spell aloud, holding it with one hand while making the right gestures with my right hand. I can feel the chill descend on me. Frost and crystals of ice start to coat the flesh from the top of my head along with my hair. It tingles. Ohhh…it kind of feels good. I shake as a chill runs all throughout my body. Past my neck and shoulders. I remember this. The cold is descending further south…

  Ahh…okay. Yes, my nipples are sensitive and yes, that was chilly but…it’s okay. It’s okay now. Back to feeling nice and chilly. This is nice.

  I can see the shadows of the heroes as they march past my rune. The rune doesn’t flash or make a noise. That way there is no way that…

  Holy fuck! Fucking nine hells! I stand up straight, my legs stiff, my back arched, my arms straight as rods. I remember why I hated casting this spell now. I have ice coating my precious honey pot and it is…ahh…so cold. So, so cold.

  “Are you okay?” Gerald asks.

  I try to speak but I can’t. Not a good way to start this combat. I just nod.

  I am fine. I’ve fought like this. I’m just not used to the cold.

  “You!” Katie says as she enters the room. She pulls out her dagger and throws it at me. A quick spell and I am just in time to hold the dagger in the air, right in front of my neck.

  “Going for the kill? And you call me a villain?” I ask.

  “Release Gerald!” Leo says. “And then surrender.”

  “No and, wait, let me think, no.”

  I toss Katie’s dagger away from me.

  “Gerald! What’s wrong?” Katie asks.

  “Nothing,” Gerald says. “Other than the fact that I am her prisoner.”

  “I will release him from her spell…” Cassandra says as she begins to cast a spell.

  “No. Save your strength for the fight,” Gerald says. “No spell holds me.”

  “What?” Katie asks stepping forwa
rd. “Then why aren’t you racing over here?”

  The goblins have lowered their spears at the heroes, ready to fight. I haven’t ordered them to fight yet so they are waiting.

  “I gave my word,” Gerald says.

  “Your what? To her?” Katie asks.

  “Yes. I will not dishonor myself…” Gerald says.

  “We are hurt! We need your healing!” Katie yells.

  “And you will get it…after your victory,” Gerald says.

  “I may be kind and allow it after mine as well,” I say smiling as wickedly as I can while ignoring my absolutely frozen nethers.

  “Then we will make this quick!” Cassandra says.

  “Yes,” I say, casting a protection spell on my goblins. A golden sheen covers them and they look at me. “What are you waiting for? Attack.”

  “Yes highness,” the say as they attack.

  Cassandra begins to cast while Leo and Katie focus on the goblins that I have left. They will not last long. I cast a quick spell, thanks to my Icy Reception.

  So, I should explain what I’m doing. Right? So, this Icy Reception spell only lasts a few minutes and I can’t cast it again until twenty four hours have passed without repercussions, but it effectively turns me into a focus for casting cold and ice based spells as well as opening up certain spells that I can just use as if I had the ability to do so. It is hard to explain to anyone who has never cast a spell, but upon casting Icy Reception I gained the knowledge of all these neat spells and abilities. They are just, bam, there in my mind. Ready to be unleashed.

  It is uncomfortable and didn’t work against a warlord and his army but three tired heroes are hardly an army.

  My spell goes off before Cassandra can finish her spell. The whole room goes white. Everything around me is covered in ice. Nice, slick, ice.

  Cassandra’s footing fails her and her spell just fizzles out.

  “Whoa…” she utters as she bends forwards and backwards. Those boots aren’t working anymore, are they? They’re behaving like the high heels they are supposed to be thanks to that little rune that stripped them of whatever was enchanting them. And I am so glad that it was a minor enchantment on those boots.