Once again the thought hits me. Is he out there breaking them even now?
Suddenly I pick up my purse. If I stay here, all these thoughts will just keep whirring. Being constantly upset isn’t doing the baby any good. I have to go out, somewhere. Just… not back to the compound, not yet. I fear if I went, I’d stay.
I go out to my car with no real purpose. I usually do my grocery shopping on Fridays, it’s Wednesday now, but at least restocking my cupboards will be something I can do without much thought.
With a destination and purpose in mind, I leave the house that I still find hard to call home, and direct myself to the store I normally use. It’s easy to find a parking spot, and soon I’m pushing a shopping cart around, trying to think of Eli’s favourite foods to tempt his appetite. Then I berate myself, that all I seem to do is think about him and his needs, while he doesn’t seem to give a damn about mine.
I’m just reaching over to get a box of cereal down, when someone slams into me from behind.
“Oh my God, I’m sorry. I wasn’t looking where I was going. Are you okay?” A concerned male voice reaches me.
Automatically my hands have gone protectively to my stomach which had been knocked into the handle of the cart. In truth, it hadn’t been that hard, just a shock.
“I’m fine.” I swing around, my mouth dropping open.
“I can’t apologise enough—”
“It’s you,” I interrupt him. “What the hell are you doing here?”
He shrugs. “I live close by. I always shop here for the necessities.”
It’s a valid excuse, I suppose. Coincidences do happen after all. If he lives around here, maybe that’s why I saw him the other day.
“Hey, I really am sorry. I don’t normally run women down.” As he winks at me, I study him, realising I was right the first time I met him, Gabe is a handsome man. Sparkling blue eyes seem to draw me in, as he offers, “Look, can I buy you a coffee to say sorry?”
“There’s no need.”
His smile drops away. “I’d like to make sure you’re alright. I did knock into you after all.” His brow furrows. “Are you in pain?”
“I’m fine,” I tell him. “I’m not hurt at all. Now, I’ve got shopping to do, and I don’t drink caffeine anymore.”
“A hot chocolate, or soda then? I’ve got nothing to do so I’m fine with waiting around. There’s a great coffee shop just up the road. Please? It might do you good to get the weight off your feet for a moment.”
I know the coffee shop, it’s the place I met up with Mom and Sam, and sitting down sounds attractive. But he’s a man. I feel it’s only fair to warn him. “I’m married.”
He chuckles and points to my very rounded stomach. “Kind of guessed there’d be a partner around.” He raises his hands. “I’m not hitting on you, if that’s what you’re worried about, but I haven’t been in town long. I’d love nothing more than to sit for a few minutes and chew the fat for a while. And seeing as I keep bumping into you,” his mouth quirks, “I suppose, quite literally this time, it seems like fate that we become friends.”
As long as he accepts friendship is all that’s on offer. Oh, who am I kidding? I’m seven and a half months pregnant—even my husband doesn’t get horny for me now. There’s little to no risk that a perfect stranger will want to jump my bones.
I don’t accept. I can’t. Even if it’s just an innocent conversation over a drink in the middle of the day, I know Eli wouldn’t like me being around a strange man. I open my mouth to turn him down, then a burst of anger hits me. Fuck Eli. If I’m right, he could be with another woman right now.
It’s that thought which decides me. “If you don’t mind waiting while I pick up a few more things, I’ll meet you in the coffee shop.” I make the decision to abandon any chilled or frozen items, and just stick to produce that can safely be left in the car.
Gabe smiles, my answer pleasing him. “What do you want? I can go ahead and order.”
Telling him just a soda, I watch him go off, presumably to complete his own shopping. When he disappears to the next aisle, I pick up the last few items I need. As I’m paying, I’m rethinking my hasty decision, then convince myself it will do no harm. Truth is, I don’t want to go home right now, and learning about someone new might take my mind off my own problems.
Having paid and packed my bags, I place them in my car, then drive the short block to the coffee shop he’d named. I park, then go inside. He’s got a table by the window, and stands as I approach, pulling out a chair politely so I can sit down. Nice manners.
“You know my name, I still don’t know yours,” he states, pushing my soda toward me.
That’s true. “Olivia,” I relent at last.
His brilliant blue eyes stare at me. “It’s a lovely name. It suits you. So, Olivia.” He voices my name like a caress. “Would you like anything to eat? This place does some delicious pastries.”
I’m feeling guilty about even just sitting opposite him and don’t want to do anything that might commit me to staying longer, so I shake my head and politely decline, even though the cakes do indeed look tempting.
“You say you’ve only recently moved to Tucson? Where are you from?” I ask, as the silence lasts a little too long.
“Oh, I’ve been moving around. I go where my job needs me.”
“What do you do?” I ask, pretending an interest I don’t own.
“I’m in sales.” He doesn’t expand on what, and I’m not bothered enough to pry.
“You don’t work full time,” I say though, wondering why he’s not in an office at this time of day.
He shrugs. “My people give me leads, I follow them up. Fortuitously there was nothing for me today, so I can spend time with you.”
I raise my eyebrow at him and give a quick grin. “Is this how you like to spend your time? Entertaining a pregnant woman?”
He looks down at his coffee cup, and lines appear on his forehead. “My wife was pregnant.”
“Was?”
“She was killed. Our baby died with her. A traffic accident.”
I cover my mouth with my hand as I try to process that information. “I’m so sorry.”
He shrugs my sympathy off. “I must admit, when I see a lady in your condition, it reminds me of what I’ve lost. I often wonder what she’d have looked like later in her pregnancy. I suppose that’s why I approached you that first time, seeing someone like you brings out my protective instincts.”
I’m lost for words, but try to summon up something. “How long ago did you lose her?”
“About five years now.” This man knows loss, pain is written all over his face, but he pushes it down and manages a smile. “I’ve done my grieving. Let’s talk about you now. Do you know what you’re having? Boy or girl?”
I also try to lighten the mood. “We didn’t want to know. I think it will be a girl. My husband insists it will be a boy.”
“Any preference?”
“As long as it’s healthy with ten fingers and ten toes, I don’t mind.”
“I’ll drink to that.” He raises his coffee cup, then asks the waitress for a refill. I decline a second soda, still slowly sipping my first.
When the waitress moves off, his smile widens. “You’ve got a glow about you, Olivia. You really are a beautiful woman.”
I look at him sharply, but his words aren’t creepy. It looks like he genuinely means it. It’s like rain falling into the desert, any compliment welcome after such a long drought. Eli hasn’t made me feel attractive for months now.
But I shouldn’t be attracting an unknown man. If I were back at the compound, Mouse or Wizard would have made sure to check him out before I was allowed within ten feet of him. But now I can only rely on myself and my instinct.
What should it matter, as long as he’s not going to kill or rape me? No vibes he gives off would suggest he’s capable of that. He seems genuine, a man who’s known such great loss, and someone who’s new to the area, and who could do wit
h a friend himself.
He takes over the conversation. Within minutes he’s got me chuckling, then laughing out loud as he relates some of his experiences and people he’s come across.
In the end, with nothing to go home to except either an empty house or a husband who I feel I’m walking on eggshells around. I do have another drink, and accept his offer of a cake.
When he suggests we exchange numbers so we can meet up again, not trusting in fate to again bring us back together, I barely hesitate. I’ve actually had fun today. I’ve felt a lightness I haven’t experienced for a very long time. I’ve smiled and just for a short while, my mind’s been taken off the troubles in my life. It would be good to have a friend I can talk to, who’s interested in me, and not just himself. Without hesitation, I hand over my phone so he can put his number in, then I text the contact he’s programmed in. I notice he’s named himself Gabe.
I’m almost reluctant to leave the coffee shop when Gabe makes moves suggesting he’s ready to go. But I pull myself together, knowing the pleasant interlude has come to an end.
Eli’s home when I arrive. He carries in the shopping when I tell him I’ve got bags in the car. Whether he knows I’ve been gone far longer than normal for a shopping trip, he doesn’t ask where I’ve been. In fact, I suspect he barely notices I’ve been gone.
When I get a text the following Monday asking if I’m free, and would I like to meet for coffee again, I don’t hesitate.
Eli’s not even out of bed yet, so I simply put my head around his door and tell him I’m going out. He doesn’t ask where.
It’s somehow freeing talking with Gabe. I quickly relax and just be me. I don’t have to watch my words, or wait for a temper to flare. Neither is he indifferent to me. If I wasn’t married, I don’t think I’m fooling myself to think there might be interest there.
As I sit opposite him laughing, I wonder whether Gabe would be someone I could turn to if I find proof Eli’s having an affair.
I’m berating myself as I arrive home to find the house empty. It’s only been five months since I stood in front of Lady and said my vows. Am I really thinking I could ever break them? Of course I’m not, it’s just that I’m so starved for affection that Gabe is having an effect on me. It’s my husband I want and need, but what can I do when he’s not there for me?
I sit, with my head in my hands, wondering what’s happened to me. What’s happened to Eli? To us?
I never thought anything could come between us. Never dreamed I’d be sitting alone in a strange house wondering where my husband is or whether he’s being unfaithful. The worst of it is, I don’t know what happened to bring us to this. Is it partly my fault? Or all down to him? Are our stars not as aligned as we’d thought? On the compound we always had family around. Had that hidden that we were drifting apart? Are the cracks showing now it’s just us?
The jangling tone of my phone startles me. I feel dizzy as I go from prone to standing too fast, but it doesn’t stop me automatically reaching for my purse. It’s Eli.
“Hi. Where are you?” Are you coming home?
But instead of Eli, I hear a stranger’s voice.
“Um, are you related to Eli Felis?”
Shit. This can’t be good. A stranger ringing from Eli’s phone.
“I’m his wife,” I say fast. “Has he had an accident?”
“No, er…” The voice sounds hesitant. “He’s having an episode or something. I don’t know whether I should call an ambulance or not. They can get expensive, so I wanted to check with you.”
“What do you mean, an episode?” My voice is shrill. “Why would he need an ambulance?”
“He’s collapsed, in the gutter. He’s not unconscious, but he’s crying and rocking, and I can’t get him to stop.”
“Where are you? I’m coming.” Jeez. What could this be?
He gives me the directions, he’s outside, where? A sex shop? Then, wasting no time, I slip back into my shoes, then place another call as I run to my car.
“Drummer.”
“Drummer, I need, Eli needs help. I don’t know what to do.”
I might not have spoken to him for months, but he doesn’t waste time on small talk. “Olivia, take a deep breath. I’m heading for my bike now. Where are you, are you at home?”
“No. Eli’s collapsed,” I gasp out as I start the engine. “He, the man who called, he described it as an episode, I don’t have a clue what that is.” I rattle off where he is.
“You go to him, Ollie. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“Shall I bring him home?”
“If he’s not hurt and you can get him moving, yeah. Just let me know what you’re doing, okay?”
My destination is on the opposite side of Tucson. As I near the address I’ve been told, I drive past a Harley store. Could Eli have gone there, or got distracted on his way?
It’s easy to see where I need to be headed. A bike I recognise as his is backed up against the kerb, but it’s the people standing around that show me where he is.
“Let me through, I’m his wife,” I demand.
My height puts me at a disadvantage, but the desperation in my voice gets their attention, and soon I see Eli lying on the pavement as though he’d been knocked down. But he’s, as the man had told me, conscious, and has his head in his hands. He’s not simply crying, he’s wailing, his body moving to-and-fro.
“Eli?” I approach, letting him know I’m here.
“We’ve tried talking to him. It didn’t work. Here, take this.” A man, presumably the one who called me, hands me Eli’s phone. “Is he on something?”
I turn and snap at him. “My husband doesn’t do drugs.”
“Well he might have today, honey. This shit ain’t normal,” someone points out.
Crouching down by his side, I soften my voice. “Come on, babe. Let’s get home.”
But he doesn’t even look at me.
I try again, and then again, but Eli just keeps rocking. When I take his arm, it’s like trying to move a rock, and all the time, he’s wailing.
“I still think he needs an ambulance,” someone says.
“Fuckin’ druggie,” someone else says.
I glance around. “Could someone help me get him to my car?”
“Whoa, no.” The man closest to me holds up his hands and steps back. “He could get violent. Who the fuck knows what he’s capable of?”
I go back to trying to talk to him, but I’m not getting through.
My situation is pitiful. I’m sitting on the edge of the pavement, my husband rocking and wailing and refusing to move. I’m getting more and more distressed as I’m helpless to know what to do, when the most wonderful sound comes up the road, that of motorcycle engines.
As is Drummer’s deep voice commanding everyone to, “Stand the fuck back and give him some space.”
Chapter Twelve
Drummer…
If Ollie’s to be believed and there’s no reason why I should doubt her, that’s my son lying on the ground with nosy fuckers staring down.
“Stand the fuck back and give him some space.” I might have stepped down from my role as prez, but my voice hasn’t lost any of the snap to it. Within seconds, the crowd’s moved a few steps back, eyeing the group of us with suspicion.
As Wraith cuts his engine and Wizard dismounts his bike, some of the crowd even start to lose interest, as citizens often do with Satan’s Devils around.
Wraith immediately goes to his daughter, pulling her into his arms, but after a quick hug she pulls away from him, her concern all for the man lying on the ground.
“Eli, Son.” I sink to my knees next to him hearing the creak like a pistol shot as my joints protest. “Eli, what is it, Son?”
It’s as if I hadn’t spoken. Gently I use my hand to turn his head toward me. Eli’s eyes are red rimmed and swollen as I search in vain for some flicker of recognition there.
There’s a man hovering. “I thought he might need an ambulance, but his
wife said no.” He sounds relieved as though there’s a male to take charge of everything.
“She’s right,” I reply shortly. “We’ve got it from here.” Ignoring him, I look at Olivia. “That your car, there?” It’s hard to tell with people who continue to mill around, fewer than there were, but still enough to block my line of sight. When she nods, I instruct her, “Go drive it closer.”
Wizard tells the people in her way to step back. When Olivia’s brought the car alongside him, I stand, then bend and get my hands under one of Eli’s shoulders. Wraith takes the other side, and we somehow manoeuvre him into the car. He makes no protest, but doesn’t stop crying.
Christ, I feel so totally lost. This is my son, and he’s hurting. For the moment all the differences between us are forgotten, and I just want him smiling again, much like when he was a toddler and had fallen off his bike. I felt as helpless at comforting him then as I do now.
“How do you want to do this, VP?” Wizard asks.
I glance at Wraith then come to myself with a start as I realise he’s addressing me. “Someone needs to go with her in case he starts trying to get out or something.”
“I’ll go,” Wraith says tightly. He sends a cautious look toward Eli, and I know he wants to accompany them to make sure Eli doesn’t start thrashing around and cause them to crash.
“Got the prospects coming. They’ll pick up both bikes. I’ll wait until they get here.”
I thank Wizard, then watch as Wraith slides in beside my son, making sure he’s correctly belted in. To be honest, Eli’s no problem, he’s allowing his arms and legs to be moved without objection, so lost in his head he seems unaware of what’s happening. Has he taken something? It’s the first thing I’ll ask when we’re back at the house, but for now the important thing is getting him off the street and to a place of safety.
The man who’d been hanging around passes a bag that he’d been holding onto and gives it to Wraith.
“Er, these were his purchases,” he tells him.
As Wraith thanks him, I decide he either works in the store or owns it. Whichever way, he’s a good man. I doubt Eli would remember if he’d simply gone back inside and put the stock back on the shelves. In my son’s current state, I dread to think what he might have chosen out of a sex store.
Hawk's Cry : Satan's Devils MC Second Generation #2 Page 10
