Outcast

by Adrienne Kress

  I could see Lacy start to make her way over to us. No. No way, she wasn’t ruining this for me. I took his hand, and he helped me stand.

  “Okay,” I said. He smiled. I waited for him to escort me over to the pool, but he didn’t. “Are we going or not?”

  “Aren’t we forgetting something?” he asked glancing down at me.

  “What?”

  “The dress code?”

  Oh no. No. No no no.

  “Hey, Riley, what’s wrong?” asked Lacy coming up beside Gabe.

  “Nothing.”

  “Cool. Oh one thing.”

  “Yeah?”

  “I should have mentioned this before, but I really don’t want my T-shirts getting covered in chlorine. I’m sure y’all understand.” She smiled sweetly. Gabe glanced at her then looked at me. His expression got serious.

  “You know what,” he said, “I’m pretty cooled off now. Never mind.”

  Shit.

  “Well, I’m pretty hot,” I said trying to sound confident. And then I reached down and pulled the T-shirt over my head, and dropped it on the ground. “But you can stay here if you’d like.” I put my hands on my hips and looked at him.

  “No way in hell,” he said with a broad smile. He grabbed my hand again and marched me over to the side of the pool. “Ready?”

  “Ready.” I was able to process the expressions on the faces watching me for just a moment before Gabe and I jumped into the water together. The cold felt awesome, and the silence was even better. But Gabe’s tight grip on my hand, even under water, was the best part.

  We broke the surface at the same time, and he grinned at me. I grinned back. And then I realized it probably was a bit strange that we were holding hands like that, so I let go quick pretending I needed to use both hands to tread water.

  “Look at you, all showing off,” said Gabe in that lowered voice he seemed to save just for me.

  “I was hot.”

  “That’s for damn sure.”

  “Shut up.”

  “You don’t like a compliment, sweetheart?”

  “No.”

  “Everybody likes a compliment.”

  “Not me.”

  Gabe shook his head and glanced around. My arms were getting a bit tired, but I was facing a bit of a conundrum. A few seconds in Lacy’s bathing suit in public before jumping under water was one thing. Climbing out, grabbing a towel, trying to do it slow to act like I didn’t care, that was another. And swimming to the side of the pool was not much of a plan either. Not when everyone was right there, waiting.

  “Gots to say, bathing suits have changed a bit in fifty years,” said Gabe turning back to me. “Not that I’m complaining.”

  “Don’t talk about the time thing,” I said quickly.

  “No one can hear me.”

  I looked around. Lacy was chatting with Charlotte, but I knew she was keeping her attention on us. Some of the other girls were blatant in their staring, though. Even some of the boys.

  “We’ve been talking too long,” I said. “Everyone’s suspicious.”

  “Who cares?”

  “We can’t make a scene, we can’t draw attention.”

  “But it’s so much fun.”

  My arms were too tired; I had to take a risk and swim to the side. I started to kick my way over. Just in time too, as Brett Warren cannonballed then, just where I’d been. Thanks for the warning, Brett.

  I held on with one hand and turned and faced back toward the pool. Brett broke through the surface right next to Gabe who gave him a high-five. How did boys always know how to communicate with each other so effortlessly?

  I guess it was easy when all you had to work with were grunts and hand gestures.

  “So, Riley.”

  I sighed and turned around.

  13.

  “So, Lacy,” I said looking up at her.

  “Looks like someone likes you.” She broke eye contact, and I followed her gaze as Gabe climbed out of the pool with Brett and made his way to the far end again.

  “Is that such a shock?” I asked.

  Neither of us actually looked at the other as Gabe and Brett ran and then jumped, dangerously close to each other, into the pool. Their splashes were pretty equal and got both of us wet. Of course, seeing as I was in the pool I didn’t mind. Lacy seemed a little annoyed by it. Still when the boys were back from under water she giggled and applauded their efforts.

  “That was awesome!” she said. Then she sat down and dangled her feet in the water right by my head. They were perfectly manicured. “It’s probably because you lost your virginity. Boys can tell that kind of thing.”

  “Maybe.”

  “You have to be careful, Riley,” said Lacy finally looking at me again. “Once boys know you’ve done it, they’ll do anything to get you to do it with them. They’ll make you feel like they think you’re special. And you’re not.”

  I should have been offended by that last statement, but as I examined Lacy’s expression, I wondered how much of it had really been directed toward me.

  “Thanks for the warning.”

  Lacy shrugged. “Take it or don’t, I’m just saying.” She kicked her feet slowly back and forth. “Are you even going to say who it was?”

  I was ready.

  “I could, but it wouldn’t matter to you. A guy I’ve known for a while up in Rochester. One of my cousin’s friends.”

  “Oh.” Lacy gnawed at her lower lip for a bit. It was a pretty believable story. Not many people at school knew all that much about me and my family. The biggest thing was that my Daddy was from the north and wasn’t rich. Mostly they knew my mother, and that was enough for us to get by without too much scrutiny. So the Rochester thing made sense.

  “Well, Riley,” said Lacy, “I should probably be a good hostess and talk to other people too. Don’t hog him all evening.” Gabe was on his third cannonball now.

  “I don’t think I could. He seems to find jumping into the pool far more amusing.”

  Lacy shook her head. “Boys.”

  Were we bonding all of a sudden?

  She stood up. “We’ll talk later. I still want the details.” She gave me one of her trademark smiles, and I thought maybe actually it could have been sincere. But I didn’t want to go down that road. Best to never wholly trust a person like that.

  “Hey, sweetheart!”

  “Who me?” I turned and raised my eyebrows as Gabe came swimming over.

  “Who else?”

  “Thought you might have been talking about Brett.”

  Gabe laughed. “We having a lovers’ tiff?”

  I felt a little embarrassed then that I’d made the joke. I thought it would be funny, I hadn’t thought how it might have come across to him.

  However, if I showed that I was embarrassed, it might make things worse.

  “Absolutely, I mean you didn’t even bring me flowers when you came to the party. Some gentleman.”

  “That was horrible of me.” He grinned and floated closer, placing a hand on the edge of the pool on either side of me. Oh dear. Was I flirting? I never knew when I was flirting. I decided to just keep going despite the butterflies in my stomach and his extremely close proximity.

  “And you wore a shirt?” I said. “I mean, what’s up with that?”

  Gabe gave me a look of mock anger. “Excuse me?”

  “Who told you you should wear a shirt? Especially to a pool party. That’s just wrong.”

  “Why you little…” And before I could dive for cover he’d pushed himself off the wall and was splashing water at me, over and over again.

  “Stop, stop…” I sputtered. I started to splash him back and felt ridiculous and also kind of amazing.

  “Sorry, what did you say?”

  “I said stop!” I let go with both hands and sent a massive wave in his direction. Gabe stopped and started to cough. More than cough, it was like he was choking or so
mething.

  I swam over to him. “You okay?”

  He nodded but kept coughing.

  “You sure?”

  “I’m sure I’m sure.” He finally stopped and looked up at me. “You’ve got good aim.”

  “Hey you were splashing me too!”

  “Got me right in the nose, in the ears, down the throat. That might have been the perfect splash, sweetheart.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  He waved off the apology and swam over to the ladder. As he climbed out of the water and took the towel offered him by the waiting Lacy, I felt bad. I didn’t think it was fair that I was feeling this terrible about just splashing him back, but I think I actually really annoyed him. He was shaking his head to the side now, trying to get the water out of his ears.

  Jeez, it wasn’t like I’d done it on purpose.

  Fortunately everyone was now so totally focused on Gabe in his clinging wet jeans, that I could pull myself out of the pool, dry off, and put on the T-shirt again without so much as a snicker.

  I sat next to Amber again.

  “Oh my god, he’s totally into you.”

  “No he isn’t,” I said. He wasn’t. It was his game, and I’d almost drowned him. He was safer out of the water and in the hands of a cheerleader.

  “He was paying so much attention to you.”

  “A bit, but look at him now.”

  “Well, at least he paid some attention to you.” She sounded bitter.

  I remembered then, the whole reason for us being here in the first place.

  “Hey, look, Brett’s been distracted by the pool, not by girls. You’re okay.”

  “I guess.”

  Mindless boy conversation was actually really helpful at making me feel less lousy watching Gabe and Lacy and the rest of the squad, so we talked a bit more about Brett and whether his hanging out with Hannah was because he liked her or he was trying to make Amber jealous. ’Course we concluded it just had to be the latter.

  Lacy’s mom brought out some burgers at around seven, and that was a good distraction too. I wondered how late I’d have to stay at this party. I also wondered if there was any way I could leave without Lacy interrogating me about “losing it.” I’d thought about not even trying to get up for a burger, I’d stayed in my corner so long I’d pretty much become invisible again. But I was pretty hungry, and I was never the kind of person who could skip a meal.

  Amber and I got up and went together. Everyone must have been getting used to us, because they didn’t say much as we passed. Then again everyone was already a little tipsy, and I don’t think they were paying too much attention to anything other than getting drunker.

  Lacy, in true hostess form, passed us each a burger.

  “You want a beer?” she asked. “You guys haven’t had anything yet.”

  “No thanks,” I said, but Amber took one. “Doesn’t your mother mind the drinking?”

  Lacy shook her head. “She cares, but she knows we’re teenagers, right? She says she’d rather have us do it under her roof where she knows what we’re doing.”

  “So you’ve had booze at all your parties? For how long?”

  “Well, this is the first time, officially…but she always turned a blind eye before.” Lacy grinned. Then she turned to where Gabe was lounging on a chair surrounded by girls and called out, “Beer, Gabe?”

  “Toss it over.” She did and he caught the can deftly with one hand. I could tell the girls thought that was super awesome as they all oohed at the catch. Oh, and ’cause one also said, “That was super awesome.” He winked at me before turning back to them. I guess that was his way of forgiving me for splashing him. Thanks, Gabe.

  I looked back at Lacy and had to face a smug smile. “Sure you don’t want one?”

  “I’m sure.”

  Amber and I moved over to the table where she had the condiments and salads laid out. Her mother had obviously gone to great lengths preparing all of it, but it seemed like kind of a stupid effort to me, considering how fast the guys were wolfing everything down. Like some magic trick: “Watch as a table of food magically disappears!”

  We managed to grab some of the potato salad before it too vanished, and a couple carrot sticks and dip. The platter of veggies was pulled out from under Amber’s hand and I could tell she was about to tell off whoever’d done it until she realized it was Brett.

  “Oh, hey, Brett,” she said, her voice rising an octave and getting kind of quiet.

  “Hey, Amber,” replied Brett, a mouth full of cucumber. “Didn’t know you were here.”

  “Yeah.” Amber took a sip of her beer and didn’t say anything else.

  Brett turned to me. “You look good in a swimsuit.”

  “Uh, thanks,” I replied.

  “Yeah, you should wear them more often.”

  “I’m not sure that would be very practical…”

  “Well, you know what I mean.”

  “Not really.”

  There was a pause in our conversation as Brett chewed. I watched. When he swallowed he spoke again.

  “Gabe’s cool.”

  “Sure.

  This time we were quiet because there was nothing more to say. I looked at Amber, hoping that maybe she’d built up enough courage to look Brett in the eye. Evidently the top of her beer can was far more interesting.

  “Hey, look,” I finally said, “I hope you guys don’t mind, but I’ve got to…go over there…now.” I really wasn’t cut out to be a wingman. Fortunately I didn’t think Brett would figure out my clever plan to get them alone.

  “Yeah, that’s cool,” he said.

  “You’ll keep Amber company?”

  “Yeah sure.”

  “Okay then. So, I’m just going to go and talk with…” I glanced at the far end of the pool, “…Eddie then.”

  “Cool.”

  “Amber, that okay?”

  “Yeah.”

  Well, that had been like pulling teeth. I wandered away from the lovebirds and joined Eddie at the edge of the pool. Eddie was the class emo, popular only because he’d had a poem published last year in an indie magazine. Also ’cause his father was a freelance photographer who’d worked for Playboy in the 80s.

  I sat down next to him, dangling my feet in the water and balancing my plate on my knees.

  “Hey, Eddie.”

  “Hey.”

  “Didn’t think pool parties were your scene.”

  “I’m not really here anyway.”

  Okay…“That’s cool. So we don’t have to talk?”

  “Can we not?”

  “Awesome.”

  14.

  Turned out Eddie was the perfect person to spend a pool party with. We just sat and ate our food quietly, occasionally making an observation about something irrelevant. It was nice to just sit and watch everyone else get drunker and drunker. Well, it wasn’t really nice to watch everyone get drunk, but it was nice not to be involved. Amber and Brett had finally moved over to the lounge chairs and sat together. Once they started talking it looked like they actually did like being with each other.

  Gabe was still the center of attention, though. Now some of the guys had joined his little harem, and the group was starting to get really loud. Some of them were pushing at each other for no apparent reason now, laughing loudly like donkeys.

  After a bit Eddie finally stood up and said, “Getting a beer. You want one?”

  “No thanks.” You’re leaving me?

  I was on my own now. The sun had almost set, and the outdoor lights had been turned on. Lacy was finding it hilarious that she couldn’t light the tiki torches, and when Julia came to help her, they both collapsed into a fit of giggles.

  I shook my head and looked back at Gabe, who was now making out with some girl whose back of the head I didn’t recognize.

  That hurt. That really hurt. It wasn’t that I was jealous, not really…well…I mean…The point was he wa
s making out with some flaky cheerleader, and I thought he had better taste than that.

  A couple chairs down, Brett and Amber seemed to be inspired by his brilliant idea and started to fool around as well. I realized now that the vantage point that I’d quite enjoyed a moment ago had suddenly turned into front row seats to some kind of soft core viewing party, and I was feeling just a little uncomfortable. So I stood up, but standing up didn’t help much as I had nowhere to go. I was saved from total paralysis when a massive blur rushed past me, and two guys fell into the water. I jumped out of the way of the splash in time and almost right into Hannah who was charging into the pool right behind them.

  Suddenly it was like they remembered there was a pool at this here pool party. Mike and Rob picked up Annie by her legs and arms and brought her toward the water. She protested, but she didn’t sound that convincing to me, considering her arguments seemed to consist of nothing but giggles. She was soon underwater, and they were close behind. Most of the other guys dove in after them, except of course Gabe who was still having a lovely time with…Charlotte evidently.

  The pool turned into a soup of loud teenagers, the water churning as they splashed and climbed over each other. It looked so the opposite of fun to me, claustrophobic.

  “Someone’s going to drown,” said a voice from behind me. I looked and it turned out to be Lacy. She grabbed onto my shoulder to steady herself. “They’re so stupid.”

  “They’re drunk. Like you.”

  “I don’t go in the water drunk. That’s dangerous.”

  “You’re right.”

  “Of course I’m right.” She shifted her focus to the lounge chairs. “Ugh, and your stupid boyfriend’s hooked up with Charlotte. She’s such a skank.”

  “If she is so is he. She’s not making out by herself.”

  Lacy turned back at me and stared at me through an unfocused gaze. “You’re so weird, Riley.”

  “I’m aware of that.”

  She didn’t really know what to say to my answer, so she returned to her initial train of thought. “And Amber seriously has stupid taste. Like Brett Warren? Ew. His dad is seriously creepy.”