Strip Search

by Erin McCarthy

“Great, see you then.” After Leighton ended the call she sat on her bed wondering what the heck she was supposed to do. Could she pull this off? A fake courtship. A hot cop. She touched her fingers to her lips, remembering the sizzle he had inspired in her with that kiss. “Holy moly, I’m in trouble.”

  This called for a best friend. She instructed her phone, “Call Zach.”

  Zach Collins had been her best friend since they were three and he had been a star on the pageant circuit, the only little boy who loved the glitz and glamour as much as the girls. His confidence had known no bounds and he did some fabulous routines to nineties classics like the Spice Girls and “What a Girl Wants” by Christina Aguilera. When Leighton had frozen on stage more than once, it had been Zach who had run out and held her hand and made up a routine on the spot for her to follow.

  These days he was making a name for himself in makeup design on a hit TV show.

  He was still fabulous.

  He was still her source for confidence.

  “Hey, sugar, what’s up?” he said instead of a basic hello. “Are you rusticating in the wilds of Minnesota?”

  “So, the groom bailed on next week’s wedding and Jill is going to fire me if I don’t find a replacement. Sadie thinks I need to ‘bring it’ more and I thought she was setting me up with some kind of test and I got pulled over and assumed the cop was a stripper and did a horrible job of flirting with him.”

  “I have no fucking clue what you just said to me. Start from the beginning. And Jill can suck my dick. She’s not firing my Leighton.”

  His attitude always made her laugh. When it came to f bombs, he swore at a rate of a thousand to her one. “If Jill sucks your dick that will be the first woman to do that in how long?”

  “Since tenth grade.” He snorted. “It was a sacrificial suck. I felt sorry for her.”

  “How generous of you.” She rolled her eyes.

  “Explain to me what is going on. How can a cop be a stripper?”

  Leighton started with the bachelorette party and explained how Axl had saved her from a panic attack.

  “Hot and observant. I like. Go on.”

  “I didn’t know it was a charity event. I thought he was a stripper, you know, nightly. So when he pulled me over I thought it was a joke.”

  “Cops that pull me over are never strippers. So disappointing.”

  In hindsight, it sounded kind of dumb. “I thought it was a setup. I acted like a freak, but what’s even weirder is he kissed me. Now I’m getting fired if I don’t produce a wedding and he is in trouble at work because my dashcam recorded everything. His solution is that we get married instead of Winnie and Todd.”

  “One, who the fuck are Winnie and Todd? Two, excuse me? Did you just say you’re marrying the stripper cop?” His voice sounded scandalized, yet excited.

  “He’s not really a stripper. But yes, that’s his solution. A fake wedding that everyone thinks is real after a whirlwind romance.”

  “That’s so now. Totally on trend. I love it.”

  “You do?” Leighton bit her fingernail. “You don’t think it’s a horrible idea to fake a relationship for career advancement?”

  “I want you to listen to yourself. You have betrayed your roots with that question. Faking a relationship for career advancement is mild compared to what some people in LA do.”

  “That’s a valid point.” Relationships might be scraping the surface of what people had faked.

  “Is he cute or does he have a butterface?”

  Leighton pictured those strong cheekbones, that stern jaw. His rich amber eyes. “Oh, he’s good looking, trust me. In a real man sort of way, super masculine. Not a pretty boy. At all.”

  “That basically guarantees he won’t be selfish in bed. Pretty boys are selfish. And oddly enough, ugly guys. You think they would try harder, but they don’t. It’s like they feel life owes them easy sex after being born with a hook nose. I’ve done the legwork on this so I know what I’m talking about.”

  “I’m not going to have sex with him.” She wanted to, but she didn’t think it was a good idea. She didn’t trust herself to stay detached.

  “I can’t even with you right now. Why the actual fuck not?”

  “Because it’s a bad idea.” She tried to sound firm.

  “Wearing peach with your complexion is a bad idea. Having sex with a hot cop that you are having a fake relationship with sounds like your best idea ever.”

  “I can’t wear peach?” Was he serious? She had a dozen items in her wardrobe that could classified as belonging to the peach family. She’d worn peach the night before.

  Zach sighed. “No, you can’t. But that’s beside the point. Please have sex with the cop. For me.”

  That made her laugh. “Everything you just said is so wrong.”

  “I gotta go. A certain aging diva just showed up an hour late so now I have to rush. Love you.”

  “Love you, too.”

  “Fuck the cop!” he said and made kissing sounds. “Ciao.”

  Leighton pictured her ankles on Axl’s shoulder.

  Damn Jackson to hell for putting that imagery in her head.

  She could not have sex with Axl. She didn’t think. Probably not. Or she’d regret it. After enjoying it. Right?

  No. No sex. But could she fake marry him?

  This was going to give her the ultimate stage fright.

  Sparkle, baby.

  She took a deep breath.

  Time to own the stage for the first time in her life.

  Four

  Axl didn’t bother to go home and change. He went straight to the hotel Leighton was staying at. It was a basic chain hotel in the mid-price range. There weren’t a lot of options for accommodations in Beaver Bend but they weren’t totally hick either. There was one high-end hotel and a couple of B&Bs in historic homes. Plus, lake cottages for rent that dotted the shoreline. He was surprised they weren’t staying somewhere more upscale, but then again the show’s star wasn’t in town yet.

  The bar was small and quiet, with one lone bartender, an older guy in his late sixties. He was chatting with Leighton, who was perched on a stool, her feet dangling freely. She was too short to reach the kick bar. She was also wearing denim shorts that showed a hell of a lot of leg. Her shirt was some kind of floral wrap thing. She was naturally very feminine and he found that very hot.

  “Hi.” When he approached her, he touched her back, rubbing a little with his thumb. It was presumptuous, he knew that. He did it anyway.

  She turned and looked up at him with a smile. “Hi.”

  Her expression was soft. He had a feeling she thought he was lonely given what he had said on the phone. It wasn’t the slightest bit true. He loved being alone. In his house. On the lake. The quiet was something he craved after the military and the demands of his current job. He didn’t need people and social interaction to constantly feed his energy. If anything, people drained him.

  He’d seen too much to need mindless chatter to fill time.

  But let her think what she wanted if he meant she was actually going to go along with this crazy idea of his. He had to admit it was insane. Yet, he had zero hesitation. Probably something he should dissect later, why he wanted a fake relationship but not a real one.

  Not tonight.

  Tonight was for coaxing and convincing Leighton.

  He gave a nod to the bartender. “How’s it going?”

  “Quiet night here, and this lovely lady is talking to me, so I can’t complain. Hope you had a quiet night too, Officer.”

  “We did.”

  “Can I get you a drink if you’re off-duty?”

  “I’ll just take a Coke, thanks.”

  Leighton was drinking a glass of wine but it was nearly empty. “And another glass of wine for the lady, please.”

  She gave him a look. When the bartender moved down to reach for the chilled wine, she said, “Drink-pushing again. I’m not a girl who gets drunk and hooks up, just as a warning.”

>   “I’m not getting you drunk to have sex with you.” He gave her a slow smile. He was going to have sex with her at some point, but he did, in fact, want her totally sober. “That’s not my style.”

  “What does that look mean?” she asked. “I can’t read your expression.”

  “I’m thinking very dirty thoughts about you and how I don’t want you drunk when I hear you say yes to me.”

  The bartender brought her wine and she sipped it. “You’re very intense, do you know that, Axl?”

  “I’m not intense. I’m just straightforward.” He truly believed that. He spoke when he had something to say. When he said it, he meant it. Plain and simple.

  “You also look at me like you’re really interested in what I have to say.”

  “Of course I’m interested in what you have to say. Why ask a question if you aren’t going to listen to the answer?”

  “I find that refreshing.” She gave a little laugh. “Attractive. I find it attractive.”

  “I find you attractive.”

  “So is this the first meeting of our mutual admiration club?”

  “This is the start of getting to know each other.” He imagined her growing up years were a hell of a lot different from his and he was curious about her life. About her.

  “Then tell me about you, Axl Moore.”

  He didn’t really want to go first, but at the same time, she’d asked so he would answer.

  “I was born and raised here in Beaver Bend. Left to join the service. Spent four years in the marines, one deployment to Afghanistan. Came home, joined the force. My parents are still married and I have two sisters who are both married. One in Chicago, one here. I own my house because I like to do home improvement projects. I hang out with my friends from back when I was a kid. I fish, I like to go boating. I run for fun. That’s it in a nutshell.”

  “You run for fun?” Leighton made a face. “Well, we differ on that. I only run if someone is chasing me, which explains my clearly not-so-skinny body.” She smiled, and it wasn’t an apologetic comment.

  She didn’t seem down on herself about her weight and he was glad about that. She had the perfect shape, in his opinion. Womanly. “Your hot body.”

  Leighton blushed a little but she rolled her eyes. “I wasn’t fishing for a compliment. But anyway, yes, I grew up in Beverly Hills. Yes, my parents are rich. Or rather, my father is rich, my mother rich by proxy. She met him when she was a cocktail waitress but they’ve been married for thirty years so whatever it was originally it definitely stuck. They both seem happy. I’m an introvert and it drives my mother crazy because she’s always the life of the party. I like books, gardening, and interior design.”

  He could see she would enjoy quiet activities. Hell, like him. Different activities, but they were both drawn to quiet solitude. “No siblings? That’s probably why you’re an introvert. Though I have two sisters and I’m still an introvert, so I guess that means nothing.”

  “No siblings. One and done. Though my life would have been easier if my mother would have had a second daughter who wanted to do all the things my mother insisted I do. I despised just about all of them.”

  “Like what?”

  “Singing lessons, dance lessons, acting lessons. Beauty pageants.” Leighton shuddered. “The beauty pageants were horrible. Let’s shove the chubby shy girl with a stutter on stage and that will help.” She laughed. “I know my mother meant well, but I still carry the scars from those days.” She held up her elbow for him to see. “Actual scars.” She pointed to a white jagged line. “I fell off the stage trying to run away from the stares of all those parents and the judges, who were not impressed with me.”

  “That’s terrible,” Axl said, remembering clearly how panicked she’d looked on stage the night before. “I’m sorry. I can’t imagine being forced to do something you don’t like. Not to mention I don’t really get the whole beauty pageants for toddlers thing.”

  “I think it’s great for some kids. They really love it. Not me. My best friend Zach was a savant. He loved every minute of it and was amazing at performing. I was the deer in the headlights.”

  “I would rather rip my nails out with rusty plyers than be in a child beauty pageant.”

  Leighton gave him a grin. “And yet… you’ll dance bare-chested for charity as an adult?”

  Axl winced. “You’ve got me there.” He put his hands up. “But I can’t say that I enjoy it. That’s too strong of a word. I can take it or leave it. My buddies Rick and Brandon like the attention. Jesse is awkward as hell and I’m just kind of hanging out.” He shrugged. “But I’ll do anything for a friend.”

  There it was. That softening expression on her face again. “That’s nice of you. You said your friend’s wife died?”

  He nodded. “Sullivan, who owns Tap That. Kendra died two years ago from breast cancer. She was only twenty-seven. Their son was two months old when she died. Finn’s a cool kid. All of us guys try to spend some time with him when we can.” When Sullivan wasn’t being an asshole, which was more and more lately.

  “Oh, my gosh, that’s so heartbreaking. I think it’s amazing that you’re willing to do something to raise money in her memory.”

  “I feel a little bit like an idiot, I’m not going to lie. But there are worse things than having women yelling that I’m hot. I think the whole event goes to their head. It’s like a positive mob mentality. Suddenly these four average guys in Beaver Bend, Minnesota are the hottest things they’ve ever seen. Except for Jesse, he’s a pro hockey player, so that automatically elevates him. And actually, Brandon is loaded so maybe that makes him a notch above too. Rick has muscles on muscles on muscles. Shit, maybe I’m the only one who is average.”

  Not that he cared. He knew he wasn’t classically good-looking. He was too rough around the edges and his mother always told him he looked too stern. That he needed to smile more. Lilly had told him he had Resting Bitch Face. Leighton thought he was intense, so Lilly and his mother were probably right. Whatever. It was his face. Like it or don’t like it. There was nothing fake about him.

  Except for this relationship he was planning to embark on with Leighton. He should feel uncomfortable with it being fake but he wasn’t. He was doing this if she was willing.

  Axl took a sip of his drink. When he turned, his knee bumped hers. It was an accident but he tensed when she gave a soft little gasp. That sound. God, she was so…ripe. Ready for a long night of him touching every inch of her.

  “I can’t speak for the women of this town but I come from a city of beautiful people and I hate to tell you this, but that is not true. Average is not what I would call you. You are, in fact, hot. Sorry.” She gave a silly mocking shrug, lifting her shoulders almost to her ears. “You’re going to have to learn to live with it, Officer Hottie.”

  “Very funny, Van Buren.” But he wasn’t actually annoyed. He thought she was downright adorable. He wanted to kiss her again.

  “Van Buren? I don’t think anyone has ever called me that.” She looked taken aback.

  “Really?” That amused him. “Who are you hanging around with? That’s what any group of friends do, they call each other by their last names.” It meant you belonged. Part of the inner circle. Maybe it was a guy thing. He’d spent a lot of his life in male-dominated environments. Hockey, the marines, the police department. Hell, even his fishing buddies were all guys.

  “I wasn’t aware we had a tight-knit friendship.”

  “I’d like to be friends.” He shifted, placing his hand on the small of her back so he could lean closer to her. “I’d like to be more than friends. So, what do you think? Are we doing this thing or what?”

  She stared at him, eyeing him with naked curiosity. “What thing are you referring to?”

  He rubbed his thumb over her lower back. “You. Me. Telling the world we’re a couple.”

  Axl couldn’t think of anything more perfect than getting an entire week with her, no strings attached. Sure, it was mildly insane
to let people think he was getting married. But once Leighton went home to LA and they staged a breakup everyone in his life would just be relieved because they would all think he was nuts for getting “married” on impulse. They would get off his back about not dating for years after something like this. The thought of buying time without nagging sounded fucking awesome.

  He and Leighton would have fun. Have great sex. He’d save his ass at work and get his promotion to detective. She would keep her TV job.

  What could go wrong?

  “This is the most bananas thing I’ve ever done, but… yes,” she said. “Let’s do this.” She fanned herself like the thought made her anxious.

  His cock jumped, happy with her answer. “Then let’s kiss to seal the deal.”

  She lowered her lashes and gave him a very sweet, very sexy smile. “I thought a handshake was how business deals are sealed.”

  “And they also say don’t mix business with pleasure but I fully intend to ignore that.” Axl brushed her blonde hair back off her face and cupped her cheek. “I’ve been thinking about your lips all day.”

  * * *

  Leighton had been doing the same. She hadn’t been able to get that kiss up against her rental car out of her head all day. Having Axl gaze at her was like every fantasy she’d ever had springing to life. He was so damn intense. He looked at her like he was hungry for her. Like she was the only thing he saw right at that moment.

  It made her feel appreciated. As if she was his only focus when he was talking to her. It was sexy as hell. He was sexy as hell. This didn’t feel real. She didn’t garner attention like this normally.

  Her dating life had consisted of men who might be categorized as hipsters. She had always been drawn to glasses over biceps. Besides, muscle men were never into her. She was considered overweight by California standards and the one time a very fit guy had asked her out, he had spent the whole dinner date encouraging her to take up hiking, biking, running, and rock climbing. It had been annoying because she hated all those things and had no intention of ever pretending to like them.