Ayrie: An Auxem Novel

by Lisa Lace

  “About what?”

  I shrugged. “You go first. We both have things we want to say.”

  Ayrie nodded firmly and clenched his hands into fists at his sides. He was trying to work up enough courage to speak. His wings quivered. “I don’t know how to start.” He looked at me uncertainly.

  “Just say it.” I felt like I might break into a thousand pieces at any moment. “I can’t stand the tension. I’m going to leave.”

  “Don’t do that.” He reached out his hand to me. “Please don’t go, Elle.”

  “You’re going to have to get on with it, then. The suspense is killing me.”

  His eyes warmed with amusement. “I might mess it up, but listen to what I have to say. When I married you, I wanted to help you. You seemed so...”

  I decided to fill in the blanks for him. “Desperate?” The truth was that I had been. But I wasn’t desperate anymore. At least, not in the same way.

  “That’s one way to put it. I would have said you were determined to get out of your situation.”

  “It sounds the same to me.”

  He shrugged. “Anyways. I thought you were pretty. More than that, actually. Sexy. You intrigued me.”

  He had never told me anything like this before.

  “After we married each other, we didn’t sleep in the same room. We had to watch Arnon and Jayne being head-over-heels in love with each other and have the twins. They were everything we weren’t. It must have affected both of us.”

  I stared down at my clasped hands and nodded.

  “I don’t know about you, but I thought if I didn’t have any expectations, we would turn out okay. But we had ideas about each other. We just didn’t talk about them. You became bitter, and I was...”

  “Aloof.” I looked up. “You were mean and ignored me.”

  He held his hands up and a pained look passed over his face. “Okay. I deserved that. I thought I was protecting myself.”

  My breath caught in my throat. What did Ayrie mean?

  “Everything kept getting worse. I don’t know what made me invite you to Vandwa with me. It might have been how wistful you looked when you found out I would be apart from you. It occurred to me for the first time that you might care about me, even though you were cold and silent.”

  “That was because I thought you didn’t want me.” He had shocked me into defending myself.

  “There are two sides to every story, right?”

  I pursed my lips together and shut up. I was supposed to be letting Ayrie talk.

  “When we were on the island, everything changed.” He gazed off into space, trying to find the right words. “You acted so loving toward me.”

  I had expected Ayrie to be the first one to show love so I could respond. I was an idiot. “I’ve always...” I couldn’t finish speaking.

  “I was worried about you when you became sick. When you disappeared, I nearly went out of my mind. But I still didn’t realize it.”

  Realize what? I didn’t say anything out loud, afraid of interrupting him.

  “We had many brushes with death, and I still didn’t wake up. Once my brother pointed out I took all the good things in my life for granted, I finally saw things as they are.”

  “And how is that?” I was unable to stay silent.

  Ayrie’s fingers drummed against his leg. He came over to me and took my hands. I felt like I couldn’t breathe after the look he gave me. He swallowed and searched my eyes. I saw the fear in his face, and I still waited.

  “Elle, I love you.”

  I could feel my eyes widen, and my knees went weak. Ayrie must have anticipated my reaction. His arm was already around me, and he braced me against his body.

  “Are you serious?”

  He looked scared. “I don’t think that’s what you’re supposed to say. I’m opening my soul to you.”

  I drew in a shaky breath. “Do you mean it?”

  “Of course I do. Would I make it up?”

  “No, but you might be saying it just to get me back.”

  “Of course I’m saying it to get you back. I love you. I don’t want you to leave.”

  His face fell. He slapped his forehead and turned away from me, brushing me with his snow-white wings.

  He thought I didn’t care about him. What kind of a fool would ask if her man is serious when he told her he loved her?

  “I’m sorry, Ayrie.”

  “It’s okay. It doesn’t matter.”

  “I’ve loved you since the beginning. At first, I needed anyone who could get me off Earth.” He gazed at me, questioningly, his eyes hurt and confused. “As soon as I saw how kind you were, I fell for you right away. I hoped you might feel the same about me. Everything seemed to have worked out for Jayne and Arnon, after all, and most of the other couples. I could tell that something was different about you. You were still friendly and kind, but there wasn’t a spark in your eye. When you decided we shouldn’t bond because you wanted to protect me, it was kind, but not what I was looking for.”

  He shook his head and ran his hand through his hair, messing it up.

  “Ayrie, our time on the island was like a dream. You were starting to act like you cared about me as more than a friend. After all our hard times together, I was floating on air. But even after all we had been through, you wouldn’t let me inside.” Tears came to my eyes. “I reached the end of my rope. I couldn’t do it anymore. I needed total commitment, and you wouldn’t give it to me. You held back.”

  “You decided to get a divorce and set me free. I had broken your heart too many times. I think this was a mistake, Elle. I should leave.”

  “It wasn’t a mistake. I was miserable without you.” I pulled on his arm, making him turn back to me. “I thought I had done the right thing, but I was a wreck.” My voice dropped to barely above a whisper. “No matter what happens, I can’t stop loving you, Ayrie.”

  He had me in his arms and was kissing me before I knew what was going on. He pulled away and looked into my eyes. “I’m not going anywhere, Elle, and neither are you.” He swept me away in a mind-blowing kiss that held nothing back and wiped every thought from my mind except how much I loved him.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  AYRIE

  She loved me, and she was mine. My sweet Elle. My heart swelled in my chest as I held her so tightly she began to gasp. I realized she was pressed against me and felt how hard my cock was. I hadn’t realized I was getting aroused. The kiss I had given her started out gentle but quickly morphed into want, need, and burning desire.

  Elle pulled away from my lips, and I followed her, needing her touch like air. But she pushed me back.

  “I want to be close to you, Ayrie. As close as we can get.” She closed her eyes.

  “There’s nothing I want more, Elle. Are you sure about this?”

  “Do you love me?”

  “Yes.” I didn’t hesitate at all.

  “I love you.”

  “I want you to be mine.” I touched her face and her hair. I couldn’t get enough of this woman.

  “Then why are you waiting? It’s time for you to fuck me.”

  “It’s supposed to be pretty intense.”

  “I don’t care. I want everything, Ayrie. All the way and all of you.”

  I swallowed. “Me too.”

  Elle crossed her arms over her chest and grabbed the bottom of the tank top she was wearing, pulling it off her body in a single movement. “I need you.” Her eyes burned into me. “I thought we would never do this.” She hooked her thumbs into her skirt and underwear, dropping them to the ground and leaving them in a pile at her feet. She stood in front of me, completely bare, giving herself to me.

  I couldn’t believe it was real.

  She reached out and stroked the feathers on my right wing. I shivered. It was the most exciting thing any woman had ever done to me. “Are your wings an erogenous zone?”

  “I don’t know.” I was barely coherent.

  She took a step toward me
and reached out for my pants, quickly undoing them and throwing them to the floor. Her eyes grew round when she saw my naked form. “What the hell is that?” She was staring at my cock.

  “We’re bigger when our wings are deployed.”

  She seemed startled but no less determined to fuck. She wrapped her hand around my cock, and I closed my eyes, unable to think clearly.

  One thought came through into my mind. It was Arnon’s advice. “Make sure she comes first. She always has to have an orgasm.”

  I pushed Elle back onto the bed and crawled over her. “Are you ready?” I needed to be sure.

  “I’ve been ready since the first time I met you.” Her chest rose and fell rapidly.

  “Spread your legs, Elle.”

  ELLE

  “Fuck. I’m going to come.” My voice trailed off into moans of ecstasy as I tried to press my hips up toward Ayrie. He firmly held them down and continued sucking on my clit until I lay limp and satisfied on the bed.

  He didn’t let me recover for long. After a couple of minutes, he picked me up and carried me into the kitchen.

  “What are you doing?” I mumbled. I tried to get my eyes open, but only managing to open one slightly.

  “There are specific things we have to do to make the bond complete. We’re missing most of the fancy decorations, but we can make do with what we have around us.” His voice was shaking. He set me down on the counter, and I slumped forward, holding my arms around his neck. “I’ll go slowly.”

  “Just do it. I’ve had enough foreplay for a lifetime. Get inside me.” I held his face and kissed him everywhere I could reach. He wrapped his arms around me, and pulled me close, kissing me and making me desire more.

  “I love you, Elle.” I grabbed him, lining him up with my entrance.

  “I love you too. But now you need to fuck me.”

  “Make love.” A hint of a smile played on his face. He looked like he was straining from holding back.

  “Whatever you want to call it, Ayrie, as long as it involves you being inside of me. I want you to make love to me.” I tilted my hips toward him and felt the tip of his cock pierce me for the first time. We moaned together. It felt fantastic.

  I realized how far I had come with him. I had never taken the initiative in sex before. Now I was ordering a gorgeous man to fuck me. I felt something rise like a fire inside me, hot and unyielding.

  “More,” I whispered. Ayrie pushed further inside.

  His cock was definitely larger when his wings were out. He hadn’t been this big back on the island. I felt stretched, opened, and completely vulnerable. And it was a good thing. When I looked into his eyes, I saw his vulnerability, too.

  “I love you, Elle.” Ayrie dropped his hands to my ass to steady himself.

  I gasped and panted. He was too big. I couldn’t take him like this. We wouldn’t be able to form a bond.

  He noticed I felt overwhelmed. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me close and whispering words I couldn’t understand into my ear. He dropped his hand to my clit and gently touched it until I started wriggling, and my breathing went ragged again.

  I felt myself relax around him and I thought I could take him. When he felt me loosen up, he thrust all the way in until our pelvic bones touched.

  “Fuck me!” I couldn’t contain myself.

  Ayrie kissed me again and played with my breasts until I was melting against him and begging him to move. It was all the encouragement he needed. He pulled back before pumping into me, plunging in and pulling all the way out again. It felt incredible. I felt another orgasm starting to build as he slid slowly and deeply into me.

  I arched against him, needing him so much.

  “Elle,” he gasped.

  “Don’t stop.” I urged him on, feeling my climax coming closer with every thrust. He sped up and started to move frantically. I writhed, pinned to the counter.

  With a groan, he stiffened, and I felt him fill me, his come pushing me over the edge into a shaking, pulsing orgasm I thought would never end. I cried out as I lost control. He held me close while the pleasure exploded in my mind.

  Something changed. It was an emotional, physical, and spiritual feeling of connection between us. Ayrie and I were joined. We were so close there was nothing between us anymore.

  The exquisite, clenching spasms continued. I tightened around Ayrie as I rode the waves of pleasure. I collapsed on him, our skin sticking together from the heat of passion that had taken both of us. I was spent and felt like I would never move again.

  “Was that the bond?” He had been resting his head on my shoulder, but he lifted it and nodded.

  I stared into his eyes and could hardly believe the love and commitment I saw there. Our bond was real, now. Nothing could ever tear us apart.

  AYRIE

  I had taken a moment earlier in the evening to send Nathaniel a message saying he shouldn’t expect us at the house anytime soon. Elle and I were busy with each other, and I couldn’t think of anything except her. I couldn’t believe I had waited so long. Fucking her felt incredible and brought us closer than ever before.

  Auxem bonding tradition was very particular about how much sex we had to have. We were supposed to fuck four more times. We certainly didn’t mind because that’s all we wanted to do. We banged out four out of the five ritual matings in the first few hours.

  Orgasms followed one after the other until we became drunk on our love, and I had never felt like this when I was drunk before. We couldn’t keep our hands off of each other. As soon as I came, she started touching my cock, making me hard again. My desire for her had no end, and she was as insatiable as I was.

  After midnight, we had fallen asleep, needing to rest. In the early morning, Elle rose to go to the bathroom. I followed her, hard and ready to go. It was dark, but in the gray light of dawn, I was able to make out the outlines of objects. She stood at the sink, washing her hands. I came up behind her and touched her to see if she was ready to play.

  She sucked in a surprised breath and pushed back against me as my finger slid inside her.

  “Oh,” she breathed as I pumped my finger in and out. Without breaking the rhythm, I replaced my finger with something thicker and harder. I pushed, embedding myself deeply within her. She sighed and braced her hands on the edges of the sink. I put my hands on her hips, drew back, and sank in again.

  “Yes,” she whispered. “Yes.”

  All I could sense was the darkness, the scent of her desire, and the hot glide of flesh on flesh. I could hear her quick, shallow breathing. I moved hard into her, the sound of my hips hitting her ass in the quiet of the night making me feel wild.

  “Don’t stop, Ayrie.” Elle pushed back against me with every thrust and took me in as deep as she could. “Right there.”

  She squirmed, and I brought my hands to her front, using one to massage each of her breasts and the other to circle her clit lightly. I could feel heat emerge all over her body, and a sheen of sweat appeared on her skin.

  My wife was about to come.

  I pinched her nipples and gently rubbed her pussy.

  “Oh God, yes!” She cried out, and I felt her fall to pieces. As she shuddered, her inner muscles clenched around me, milking every drop from me. Ripples of ecstasy rocked her body. I caught her so she wouldn’t fall. I carried her to the bed and lay her down, kissing her all over.

  “I love you.” She was barely able to move her lips.

  “Was it okay, then?”

  “Okay?” She sounded insulted.

  “Let’s try ‘good.’”

  She shook her head. “Try mind-blowingly awesome.”

  I nodded my head. “I was afraid to say it, but that’s where I was, too.”

  “Come over here.” Elle flopped an arm over mine, gently pulling until I lay down next to her. “You need your rest.”

  “Why?”

  “So you can fuck me again, silly.” She quickly dropped off into sleep.

  Chapter Twenty-Four
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  ELLE

  I rarely looked at myself in the bathroom mirror, but lately, I couldn’t help it. Nothing seemed different from the front, but I thought I could see a small bump when I turned to the side.

  My condition would be obvious to everyone soon. I was about four months pregnant.

  I heard a door close before Ayrie appeared. He didn’t look away from me even though I was nude. I put my hand on my baby bump and smiled.

  “Let me guess. You want to have sex again.” He grinned and started to unbuckle his pants.

  I shrugged. Ayrie knew exactly what I was thinking about. Jayne had been right about pregnancy making women horny. I couldn’t believe how I had changed.

  He pulled off his work clothes; only his boxers separated the two of us. He came over with a smile on his face I knew he saved for me. I liked having something special between us.

  “How’s our little egg?” He patted my belly.

  “Our baby, who is not in an egg, is fine. A midwife who works with Allex said everything looks good except my iron levels. It may be why I’m tired all the time.”

  “Is there anything they can do for you?”

  “Don’t worry, Papa. She gave me supplements. Everything will be back to normal in a couple of days.”

  “If you say so.” Ayrie didn’t look reassured.

  I turned around to face him. We had been talking to each other while looking in the mirror.

  “Do you want me to prove I’m one hundred percent healthy?” I closed the gap between us and made my nipples brush his chest. He saw the challenge in my eyes and matched it with another.

  “As long as you lie down and rest while we fuck, I’m up for it.” He led me over to the bed.

  I had wanted to ask him about something. “What happened with the ships we spotted today?”

  “It was nothing. They weren’t hostiles, after all.”

  “Good.”

  He pulled me down, and we twisted ourselves together. I loved how our bodies perfectly matched.

  “Anders came over today.” He began kissing my neck while his leg gently forced mine apart.

  “What did he want?” Ayrie whispered into my collarbone. I gasped as he hit a sensitive spot where my neck met my shoulder.