Coming Home

by Julie Sellers

  As they neared the center of town, Lillie slowed. “Just pull in under the porte-cochere.”

  “Oh,” Lillie was speechless as she pulled beneath the covered carport and an older gentleman came around to open her door and offer his hand to help her from the car.

  “Welcome, m’lady,” he said in a rich, Irish brogue as Lillie accepted his assistance and hand alighting from the van. “Top o’ the mornin’ to ye.”

  Peering into the interior of the van, he noticed Jon and smiled again, “Why, Jonny, me’ boy! I didn’t recognize the car. ‘Tis our fearless leader, returned.”

  Jon climbed from the car and made his way to the driver’s side where the man greeted him with a warm hug Jon seemed to return in equal measure. Jon had never been an overly demonstrative person, except with her and it surprised her to see him embracing the stranger.

  “Lillie, meet Seamus. He and his better half help me take care of our guests. Seamus.” Jonathan motioned toward Lillian and Seamus offered his hand once again. “Meet Lillie Ole—Harper, an old friend.”

  “Seamus O’Brien, at your service.” He raised her hand to his lips and bowed briefly as Lillie looked, wide-eyed, at her surroundings.

  Jonathan busied himself attending to Molly and lowering her chair on its lift from the van as he sneaked glances at Lillie from the corners of his eyes. He watched her carefully as she surveyed her surroundings.

  Lillie vaguely remembered a few abandoned storefronts lining this side of the street. Now it was transformed. To her left, what remained of the original buildings boasted bright green awnings. Underneath, large picture windows were emblazoned with the Oleson Outfitter’s logo. They displayed colorful canoes, tents and outerwear, professionally lit and glowing in the early morning light. Attached to the original façade was a large log structure she realized must be the inn.

  “Come now, Lassie,” Seamus said and offered his arm. “Let’s see what Mrs. O’ has laid out for our breakfast.”

  Lillie turned back to the van and said, “Just let me get my bag.”

  “Nonsense. Howard will see to it and the car.” And as if by magic a tall thin man she assumed to be the aforementioned Howard appeared.

  “Why, thank you,” she offered, and he tipped his hat to her, but said nothing.

  Lillie allowed Seamus to lead her through the great, tall front doors of the inn. They stood at least ten feet tall with windows cut in the shape of gnarled oak trees mixed with the pines these northern waters were so famous for.

  “Beautiful,” Lillie uttered as she followed Jonathan, pushing Molly’s chair. Lillie ran the fingers of her left hand down the smooth panel as they entered.

  “Remarkable, are they not?” asked Seamus. The question was rhetorical and didn’t require an answer, which was fortunate, because at that moment, Lillie caught her first glimpse of the main lobby of the inn and was speechless. Her breath caught as her eyes darted from side to side, trying to take it all in. It was grand, to be sure, but it also felt familiar to her, even as she was in awe of it.

  A large river rock fireplace stood directly ahead with curving log staircases curving on each side to the second floor mezzanine and what she assumed were wings of guest rooms beyond. In front of the fireplace were deep burgundy leather sofas and chairs with ottomans. Newspapers from several cities lined the tables, scattered amongst the furniture. Plush oriental rugs dotted the heart of pine floors. To her left, tucked under the mezzanine, was a reception desk and on her right an expansive dining area where a woman, no more than five feet tall was laying out what looked and smelled to be a fabulous breakfast.

  “Mrs. O—I’m as hungry as a bear!” Jonathan shouted when they entered the dining area.

  “And twice as wicked!” The tiny woman whirled at the sound of his voice. “You’ve made it so soon! We'd not been expectin’ ye till suppertime, me laddie.” Mrs. O’Brien threw her arms around Jonathan’s neck and kissed him solidly on the cheek. Again, to Lillie’s amazement, he returned her greeting with equaled affection.

  “We drove and slept in shifts. I hadn’t expected that, but Lillie brought us half the way while I slept.” Jonathan repeated the introductions and said, “Sit, Lillie, while I get you some coffee.”

  Mrs. O’ swatted Jon with the towel she was holding and said, “Where’s yer manners, laddie? The young lass must be exhausted.”

  “A little,” Lillie offered, “but mostly I’m just glad to be out of the van.”

  “My dearie, I’m sure ye'd like a chance to freshen up after your long journey.” Mrs. O’s brogue, though no less heavy than her husband’s, was sweet and melodic.

  “Why, yes, that would be wonderful,” Lillie replied as Jon eased Molly to a table and wearily lowed himself into one of the oak side chairs, so similar in their mission oak styling to Lillie’s own dining room furniture.

  “How did my bairn fair on the drive? They usually fly out, and I’ve been worried the time would be too taxing.” Mrs. O paused to give Molly, who laughed and chortled at the attention, a hug and a kiss before leading Lillie slowly across the expanse of the front hall. The moment allowed Lillie a chance to once again, take in her lush and luxurious surroundings.

  “She was a trouper and slept most of the way,” Lillie answered.

  “I’m so glad you were able to make the trip with them. We usually make do with one of the company fleet to shuttle our girl, but they’ll be here awhile and we'll need Miss Donna’s van,” Mrs. O said, as they crossed a lobby.

  “Ah,” said Lillie, somewhat disappointed, much to her chagrin. So Jon hadn't engineered the transportation explanation in order to spend time with her and show her what he’d built. She was angry with herself for even thinking along those lines and furious for caring in the first place.

  “I’m just so amazed at this place. I—He told me he was a guide.”

  “Oh, ‘tis that and a bit more, me dearie.”

  “More than a bit. I’ve been to Whitetail on several occasions, and it was always lovely, but this is spectacular!” Lillie said, still scanning the great room, attempting to take it all in.

  “We have an excellent staff,” Mrs. O offered.

  “He mentioned a partner, Brenna?” Lillie inquired, unabashedly digging for more information.

  “Brenna’s me’ daughter. She runs the catalog and the Internet part of the business. Seamus and I are here in the inn and restaurant, and Jon oversees the tours and the outreach programs.”

  “Jon mentioned a few cabins and a storefront for gear…but I never imagined…”

  “ ‘Tis quite the place. After you’ve settled in, I’ll call our Bren to give you a tour. Right now, I need to get back to my breakfast before Donna arrives to help. She needs to conserve her energies. Without Molly around to fuss over, she’s been at loose ends I’m afraid.”

  “I can imagine.” Lillie chuckled. Turning serious, she added, “I do hope she’s gotten some rest.”

  Mrs. O patted Lillie’s arm and replied, “She’s restin’ but we have to trick her into it.” Lillie laughed, and Mrs. O continued on, “I told her to rest or I'd get one of their rock climbing harnesses and tether her to her room.”

  Lillie continued to laugh as she pushed open the door to the powder room, and Mrs. O turned back to the dining area. After freshening up, Lillie stared in the mirror for a long time, feeling like Alice through the looking glass. Some things seemed the same, even familiar, but so much more had changed, in Jon and in her. She took stock and realized she was finally beginning to let go of much of the old hurts and heartache she’d held on to for so long. Cat was right—oh, how she’d love to hear that.

  Holding on so tightly to her pain for so long was not working for her. She loved her children, built her life around them, and, for all intents and purposes, found contentment in her life. Since she’d seen Jon a week ago, she began to see how very closed off she’d been.

  She was a mother, and she would not change that for the world, but she was also a woman. One who onc
e upon a time loved a man with all of her heart.

  * * *

  The cool water Lillie splashed on her face allowed her to feel alert enough to realize her stomach was rumbling. She exited the powder room and once again made her way through the stunning lobby, past the massive fireplace and back to the dining room area where she found Donna settled between Jon and Molly with a hand grasping each of them.

  When Donna noticed Lillie approaching, she sprang from her seat and hugged Lillie to her. “Oh, my goodness, it’s good to see you. I feel like I’ve been away from home a month.”

  Lillie looked closely at Donna and felt relieved to see her looking rested and calm, despite the days of testing and the emotional upheaval. “You look great!”

  “They’ve been pampering me quite a bit.”

  “It shows,” Lillie said, her smile genuine.

  “You must be exhausted!” Donna exclaimed.

  “Not really. I slept half way.” Lillie took a deep breath. “The smell of the pines is invigorating.” Lillie breathed deeply once again, “I’m getting my second wind.”

  “How are the children?”

  “Wonderful, off on an adventure with their grandparents.” And Lillie went on to tell of the trip and their plans for the week.

  “And so excited, I bet they won't sit down for a week.”

  “You know them all too well.”

  “That I do…so, Lillie, how long do we have you with us?”

  “I’ve a flight booked for Sunday afternoon, unless you need me.”

  “Sheila comes in on Tuesday, but if it will make you stay a bit longer, we need you desperately.” She turned to give her granddaughter’s hand a squeeze. “Don’t we, Molly?”

  “I can stay. I don’t want you to overdo.”

  “I’m going to be in a hospital bed for five days, but if it gets you to stay, I’ll not sleep a wink.”

  Just then, Jon returned from the buffet table with a tray loaded with bacon, scrambled eggs, and an assortment of baked goods and two steaming mugs of coffee.

  Lillie laughed. “If you eat all of that, we’ll have to roll you out the door!”

  “Oh no, this plate is for you. I’m on my way to the store to check things out and spend some time with Bren.” He grabbed a chocolate chip muffin and high tailed it out the door next to what appeared to be an eighteenth century breakfront straight from an English manor house that held a coffee service, tea set and several kinds of juice.

  Lillie looked around the room again and then back at Donna. “Wow.”

  “It’s quite the place, isn’t it?”

  “That’s the understatement of the year…of the decade. It’s so beautiful, homey, and familiar somehow.”

  Donna nodded in agreement as Lillie sampled the luscious looking offerings on her plate.

  Lillie took a bite of scrambled eggs, sipped her piping hot coffee, and said, “You never told me…”

  “You never asked, dear,” Donna replied as she reached out and patted Lillie’s hand. “And I always had the feeling you didn’t really want to know.”

  “I didn’t at first, and as time went on it seemed like the elephant in the living room—something we never talked about.”

  Donna shook her head in agreement. “You never asked about Jon, never pumped me for information. I just assumed it was too painful for you.”

  “It was…is--” She looked up sheepishly and then continued. “I’ve always believed people don’t change. We are at forty-six who we are at six.”

  Donna considered Lillie’s words with a tilt of her head, but remained quiet, waiting for Lillie to continue.

  “But in the last week everything I’ve believed to be true for so long has ceased to be my reality, and I don’t know what to think anymore.” Lillie rested her elbow on the table and put her head in her hand, looking downward at the table, avoiding Donna’s gaze. “A part of me is angry at Jon, so very, very angry and still so hurt. But the other part—the part that refused to hear him so long ago is just sorry…so sorry.”

  “Lillian. Have you ever considered what happened to both of you was the plan?”

  Lillie’s head snapped out of her palm, and she looked at Donna. “The Lord working in mysterious ways?” Lillie asked sarcastically.

  “Exactly.”

  “I don’t know. Losing the babies, losing Jon. I don’t think I want to believe in a God who makes plans like that.”

  “Darling, there is good and bad equally in every life. You can’t have one without the other.”

  “I know, but—’’

  Donna cut her off with a loving squeeze of the hand. “But we can be lucky enough to find the people who are meant to stand by us. The ones our hearts designate as our true home.”

  “But he didn’t stand by me. He left me because I couldn’t give him a child.”

  “Maybe he left you because he couldn’t give you a child. There’s a difference,” she said gently.

  Lillie said nothing. She just sat studying the rim of her thick coffee mug.

  Donna continued, “I’d never in a million years wish Rett’s on any child, but I love Molly one hundred percent just the way God made her. Had she been a healthy child, Cynthia may have been able to cope eventually. I can’t imagine what the last few years would have been like without Molly.” Donna went on when Lillie still did not comment. “Just like I can’t imagine a world, and neither could you or Cat or Rand without a pixie princess named Hope or a terror named Alex.”

  Lillie smiled at the reference to her children and finally nodded. “Of course not, and I know if things had been different, I’d not have them. The thought alone terrifies me!”

  “And Jon would not have had the courage to build all of this, which supports his work with the kids.” She gestured widely. “So there comes a point in every life when we must stop doubting and let go of all the old hurts so we have room to hold on to what’s important.”

  Lillie sighed. “That’s just what I’m beginning to figure out.”

  * * *

  Lillie awoke with a start in unfamiliar surroundings. For a moment, she didn’t remember where she was. Then a single thought pierced through the fog of her sleep-numbed mind: Jonathan.

  Jonathan’s business. Jonathan’s Inn. As she lay staring at the gauzy canopy draping the massive four poster bed, the afternoon sun began to slant through her open, westward-facing window indicating the noon hour had likely come and gone.

  Lillie had no idea how in the world she came to be here when she’d spent so much of the last few years attempting to forget about her ex-husband and the failure of their marriage.

  She’d done so well for so long, putting Jon and all he’d meant to her out of her life. Now, she didn’t know which end was up. The lines she’d so clearly drawn in the sand were blurred and she was having trouble understanding why she’d drawn them in the first place.

  Jon’s business was amazing. She couldn’t believe how much he’d accomplished in such a short time. She’d expected a small store and guided tours of the Boundary Waters Canoe Area, but what she’d found was a backwoods oasis. The lobby had been spectacular and her room luxurious. The information packet that waited in her room included a spa services list to rival Elizabeth Arden.

  Some touches were distinctly feminine, although not feminine enough to make a man uncomfortable; it was just enough to make a woman feel pampered and appreciated. A delicate balancing act. Lillie wondered if Jon had a decorator. She didn’t think Jonathan could have done this himself. Maybe someone special helped him. Maybe Brenna.

  Lillie bristled at the thought and pulled the oversized t-shirt she’d slept in over her head and opened the door to the bathroom. She adjusted the shower spray and soon was enjoying the warm pulsating beat of the water against her travel-weary muscles.

  The miles melted away beneath the spray, and her mind wandered to Brenna O’Brien. What role, she wondered did she play in Jon’s life—purely professional, or as she guessed, a more personal one? She d
ecided a trip to the store was in order, as soon as she could make herself presentable. Maybe she could catch a glimpse of the mysterious Brenna.

  Lillie toweled off with one of the sinfully luxurious Egyptian cotton bath sheets and quickly threw on a pair of khaki slacks and a black pullover. She gave her hair a quick brush before adding mascara and a bit of apricot lip-gloss.

  She appraised herself carefully in the mirror and said to herself, “That’s as good as it gets, I’m afraid.” She’d packed lightly for the few days of her stay, never dreaming she’d need more than a basic wardrobe. But then, she never suspected anything so grand or so luxurious in Whitetail.

  There was a soft knock at her door, and she hurried across the room to answer it. Had she been asleep, she would not have heard it. As it was, she felt great after her nap and invigorating shower.

  “Hello,” Jon said and thrust a vase full of daisies at her.

  “Thank you, Jon.” Lillie smiled.

  “Mrs. O. asked me to bring them up,” he clarified. “They would have been in the room when you arrived, but they weren’t expecting us until much later.”

  “Oh, well,” Lillie answered, trying to hide her disappointment while feeling embarrassed that she’d assumed he’d remembered her favorite flower and brought them to please her. It had been a long time since she’d expected anything from Jonathan Oleson, let alone flowers, she chided herself. She’d do well to remember that for the remainder of the trip. “Come on in.”

  Lillie stepped aside. Jon entered and placed the heavy pottery vase on the nightstand where she’d see them first thing in the morning. “My favorites. Mrs. O is quite the innkeeper.”

  Jon nodded in agreement and replied sheepishly. “At least some things stay the same,”

  “Stay the same? You are the one who’s changed, Jonathan Oleson!”

  His hands were in the pockets of his jeans and he looked down at his feet and said, “I had a lot of time on my hands.”

  Lillie bristled and nearly replied it had been his choice, not hers, but she refrained, not wanting to turn the conversation into a tit for tat. They’d made it this long without a post-mortem of their relationship; she supposed she could wait a bit longer.