Hallie's Destiny (The Donovans of the Delta)

by Peggy Webb

  Josh glanced at his friend in astonishment, then he realized he’d only mentioned the marriage. “She’s already divorced. Surely you didn’t think . . .”

  “I don’t make moral judgments. I just call the cards as I see them.” Herb pulled a tissue from his pocket, wrapped his gum in it, and heaved it into the wastebasket. “Now, let’s get on with this business of selling women’s underwear.”

  Their meeting lasted an hour. When he stood up to leave, Herb reached into his pocket for another piece of bubble gum. Stuffing it into his mouth, he sailed the wrapper toward the wastebasket. “Think about everything I said, Josh. It’s about time for you to start thinking of yourself. I don’t like to see you let your brother and your dad steal your chance at happiness.”

  Josh stood up, walked around the desk, and clapped his old friend on the shoulder. “I promise I will. Thanks, pal.”

  After the door closed behind Herb, Josh buzzed his secretary. “Hold all calls for an hour, Sadie.” He sat in his chair, leaned back, closed his eyes, and put his full powers of concentration on the task of unraveling the tangled web of his life. At last he got up, went to his closet, and took out the cardboard replica. Then he stood The Woman in Red beside the window.

  “You’re back where you belong, Hallie.”

  o0o

  Two weeks after the birth of Tanner’s daughter, Hallie said goodbye to Dallas and turned her El Dorado north and east toward Memphis, Tennessee. She’d been working on her master’s degree there when she’d met Robert Gilbert. Going back after nearly five years would be a catharsis for her. Although she’d long ago resolved her feelings of love and hate for Robert, going back to the place they’d met and fallen in love would finally put their relationship to rest.

  She drove with the top down, taking advantage of the late May breezes. But it wasn’t Robert who occupied her thoughts; it was Josh. Curiously enough, it wasn’t the embraces or the picnic or the moonlight swim she rememberd. She kept hearing what he’d said the day her kite got stuck in the tree. “Hallie, if I wanted you, nothing could keep me away.” Knowing Josh, recognizing the full power of him, she realized his statement was true. If he wanted her, nothing would keep him away. Everything boiled down to that—he didn’t want her.

  Hallie wiped a tear from her eye. “Darn it all. If I don’t quit thinking about Josh, I’m going to get really maudlin.” Wolfgang, sitting beside her, was attuned to her mood. He leaned his big head over and propped it on her shoulder.

  “Thanks, pal. I needed that.” She gave him a quick rub under his chin. “How silly of me to dwell on something that’s over and done with.”

  o0o

  She arrived in Memphis at dusk. With Tanner’s help she’d already arranged for a furnished apartment close to the campus. As she moved her gear inside, she was thankful worldly possessions didn’t mean much to her. Two suitcases, a duffel bag, and a large cardboard box held everything she considered essential to the comfort of herself and her dogs.

  She settled them in, then unpacked her books. She’d already done most of her preliminary reading for the thesis. She’d started last Christmas when she’d first made her decision to go back to school. If she were lucky, she’d be finished with her degree by the end of summer. Turning on a lamp, she curled up in a chair with a hefty book on early diagnosis of learning disabilities.

  o0o

  The flowers arrived a week after she’d begun her studies. They were delivered to her apartment on Saturday morning. A dozen red roses. After she’d shut the door behind the delivery boy, she opened the box and took out the card. “Roses because you’re special. I wish they could have been bluebonnets. Josh.”

  Hallie sank to the carpet and put her face among the blossoms, then she let the bouquet drift to the floor. Why, Josh? Why? Reason told her to throw the roses out the door and tear up the card. But her heart told her something else.

  “What are we to do?” A tear slid down her cheek and dropped onto a rose petal.

  She put the roses in water and set the vase in the middle of her dining room table so she could see them while she studied. And before she went to bed that night, she moved the flowers to her bedroom so she could smell them while she dreamed.

  o0o

  Bright and early Sunday morning she rummaged around in her desk until she found an old address book, the one in which she kept all the addresses and phone numbers of the companies she’d done modeling for. Under the S’s she found Silken Moments. She pulled out notepaper and sat down to write. “Dear Josh, The roses are glorious. Thanks.”

  Too abrupt, she decided. Chewing on the end of her pencil, she stared into space. Then she wadded the notepaper up, took a fresh sheet, and started again. “Thank you for the lovely bouquet. The smell of roses reminds me of our picnic in the meadow.”

  Too personal. He’d think she was trying to get him back. Her face flamed as she crushed the paper and tossed it away.

  After three more attempts, she finally settled on a thank you note that she could have copied from any high school English textbook. Her dogs walked with her to post the note. On her way back to the apartment, she wished fervently for a bull to ride. She was tense as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

  The following Saturday Josh sent gardenias. “The sweet fragrance reminds me of you,” the note said. This time Hallie made her thank you note personal enough so he wouldn’t wonder if it had been churned out on a computer.

  Yellow roses came the next Saturday. Violets the next. Orchids the next. The accompanying notes became more and more personal. “Yellow roses remind me of Texas, and everything that is Texas reminds me of you.” With the violets— “This is the closest thing I could find to bluebonnets. I never see blue without remembering you in my arms.” And among the orchids— “Exotic flowers for an exotic woman. Hallie, I left you in Texas, but you came to Florence, Alabama, as surely as if you’d ridden beside me. You are in every sunrise, every sunset, every birdsong, and every flower. Missing you, Josh.”

  Hallie kept all his notes in the drawer of her bedside table. Each night she reread them, trying to make sense of what was happening. But the truth eluded her. The only thing she knew for certain was that they’d never really said goodbye. Both of them had known it. All their logic couldn’t wipe out their enormous attraction. Whether they could ever have a future together was a moot point. What mattered was the feelings between them that couldn’t be denied.

  Josh filled her with jubilee. That was the bottom line. When the time came—and it would, she knew that as surely as she knew her own name— she’d revel in her jubilee and let the future take care of itself.

  Still holding his notes, she reached for the phone. The only number she had for Josh was the one at Silken Moments. She dialed and let the phone ring six times before she remembered it was Saturday. As she hung up, she knew Monday would be a long time coming.

  o0o

  And it was.

  She didn’t get a chance to call again until late Monday afternoon. Josh’s secretary told her he was out of town, would be out of town all week. Hallie was not deterred.

  “Tell him I called,” she said.

  “Any message?”

  “Yes. Tell him it’s lonesome on my side of the cove.”

  Charged with energy, Hallie turned back to her thesis.

  o0o

  She wasn’t even up when the doorbell rang the following Saturday. She’d worked well into the night on her thesis. As the bell pealed again, she threw back the sheet and reached for her robe. It was red, a soft cotton wrap that covered the subject without being boring. Raking her hand through her tangled hair, she went to the door. The sweet fragrance of honeysuckle hung in the air.

  The delivery boy was unusually big and tall. He filled her doorway, holding the bouquet so that it covered his face.

  “Delivery for Miss Hallie Donovan.”

  The voice made goose bumps pop up on her arm.

  “Josh?” she whispered.

  He lowered
the flowers. “Honeysuckle is blooming everywhere in Florence. The smell nearly drove me wild. Your hair always smells of honeysuckle.”

  She stood in her open doorway, too captivated by the sight of him to say a thing.

  Smiling, he reached out and tipped up her chin with his forefinger. “You look good enough to eat in red.”

  She ran her tongue over her lips. “Have you had breakfast?”

  He threw back his head and roared with laughter. “Is that an offer, my wicked gypsy angel?”

  His laughter and his saying her nickname transported her back to the lake, to a time before the hurts, before the goodbyes. She unconsciously stood taller, looking him squarely in the eye.

  “Certainly.”

  “Can I come inside, or do you want me to stand out in the hallway and scandalize the neighbors?”

  Suppressing her smile, pretending to be insulted, she quoted what he’d said the day he’d climbed the tree. “I’ll have you know my intentions are strictly honorable.”

  “Mine aren’t.” He reached out one arm and pulled her against his chest. His eyes glowed with amber fire as he gazed down at her. “I came as soon as I got your message, Hallie.”

  “I wanted you to.”

  “I’ve missed you so much I could taste it. Not a day has passed that I didn’t want you in my arms. Not an hour has passed that I didn’t remember the feel of your lips, the glow of your skin, the beauty of your smile.” His arms tightened. “You’re my obsession, Hallie Donovan. I can never let you go.”

  His lips crushed down on hers. All their pent up longings poured forth in the kiss. Hallie molded herself to him, seeking the familiar hollows and planes and ridges of his body. The honeysuckle drifted to the floor as he backed her into the room and kicked the door shut.

  His mouth never left hers as his hands found her belt, loosened it, and pushed her robe apart. As always, the passion between them could neither be controlled nor denied. Hallie accepted her destiny as surely as she accepted the rising of the sun.

  “You can tell me no, Hallie,” he murmured, “while I can still turn away.”

  “Nooo . . .” She was so overwhelmed she could barely get out the word.

  He pulled back from her and gazed into her face. “I didn’t mean for it to happen like this, Hallie. With us passion always seems to get in the way of reason.”

  “No.” She reached blindly for him. “Don’t turn away from me, Josh. I want you.”

  He held her close, buried his face in her fragrant hair. “I can’t promise anything,Hallie. I can’t offer anything except passion.”

  “That’s all I want . . . and need. I’ll take the moment, Josh.”

  His lips found hers again. “Sweet,” he murmured. “I’m so hungry for you.”

  This time, knowing how it would all end, they kissed in a slow and languorous manner, savoring each other. With his mouth slanting across hers, he could feel the simmering heat of her, the gathering passion, the vibrant excitement.

  His mouth left hers as he slowly pushed her robe aside. It fell to the floor, landing like a giant scarlet blossom among the fallen honeysuckle. He sucked in his breath at the sight of her. He curbed his greed long enough to let his gaze wander down her body. Her torso was lithe, her waist almost small enough for him to span with his hands.

  Like a man in a daze, he reached out and circled her waist. “You are perfection, a dream come true.”

  She lifted her heavy hair and let it fall back around her shoulders. “I’m real. Touch me.”

  His hands drifted slowly down her hips, then he opened them flat against her stomach. “I’ve dreamed of this, Hallie.”

  The scent of honeysuckle drifted around them, as he unbuttoned his shirt, cast it aside. In one swift movement he cast aside his pants and lowered her to the floor. Her hair spread over the scarlet robe, a raven’s wing against flame. Her long slim legs pressed against the honeysuckle.

  For a moment he propped himself on his elbow, worshiping her with his gaze. “My woman in red. You’re too exquisite to be real.”

  Her slow smile was sexy. “Try me.”

  “An invitation too good to resist.”

  For a very long while nothing existed except the two of them, joined together on a bed of red silk and honeysuckle. When their passion was spent, she lay among the crushed honeysuckle, content in the afterglow of love.

  And then, because she was a woman who desperately needed to be in charge of her own destiny this time around, she sat up, inched away from him and hugged her knees while he put on his pants.

  “Josh, I have to know. Why did you come back?”

  He caught a strand of her dark hair and let it twine around his fingers. “For the same reason you couldn’t tell me no.”

  Looking down into his face, she almost said love. She felt such tenderness for him, such longing, such passion. But her freedom had been hard won. She was wary.

  “Obsession?”

  He released her hair, stood to pick up his pants then step into them. “Let’s call it that, Hallie.”

  She stood up too. “Agreed.”

  “You stay on your side of the cove, and I’ll stay there too.”

  She laughed.

  For the first time since he’d entered the apartment, he looked at his surroundings. Flowers were everywhere. The orchids were still fresh, the violets drooping. Dried yellow roses had been plucked off their stems and now adorned the hatband of Hallie’s Stetson. “And I see you got my flowers.”

  “Yes, thank you. You know how I adore flowers.” She paraded across the room, as gloriously naked as the day he’d first seen her in Ray Hubbard Lake. Plucking the hat off the hat rack, she set it on her head.

  “Do you plan to wear that fetching outfit to breakfast?”

  “My Aunt Agnes used to say no outfit was complete without a hat.” She modeled for him, turning back to smile over her shoulder. “Don’t you agree?”

  He chuckled. “That Aunt Agnes is one smart woman.” He was across the room in two strides. With one smooth move he lifted her off her feet and held her against his chest. “Did Aunt Agnes also tell you that hats have been known to drive men crazy?”

  “No. How crazy?”

  “My dear, this requires a demonstration. Which way to the bedroom?”

  She pointed. His pants hit the floor on the threshold; her Stetson landed on the bedpost. Hallie lay back against the sheets and lifted her arms.

  “Show me, Josh.”

  And he did.

  o0o

  They might never have made it to breakfast if it hadn’t been for Hallie’s dogs. Ludwig and Wolfgang—cowards that they were—had stayed on their pallets in the kitchen until hunger drove them out. Ludwig entered the bedroom first, pushing open the door with his big front paw. Wolfgang was close behind. With their plastic bowls caught in their mouths, they marched to the side of the bed and stood there.

  “We have an audience,” Josh said.

  Hallie glanced at her dogs and smiled. “They’re hungry.”

  “So am I. But not for food.”

  “Go to the kitchen, fellows. I’ll be right there.”

  Dropping their dishes on the carpet, they trotted off.

  Josh’s voice was thick as he rolled onto his back, taking her with him. “You shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep.”

  “I’ll keep it.” Hallie smiled. “Eventually.”

  o0o

  Eventually, she did.

  After the hungry Danes and the hungry lovers had eaten, the four of them went for a walk. Hallie wore her Stetson with the dried yellow roses. She wore clothes too—Josh had playfully insisted.

  Summer heat rose from the pavement. A few summer school students, lured away from their studies by the Saturday sunshine, strolled along the sidewalks. Accustomed to Hallie in her cowboy boots and Stetson, they didn’t even lift an eyebrow.

  Arms linked, Josh and Hallie talked.

  “How are your dad and your brother?”

  “N
othing has changed with them, Hallie. After all these years, I tend to take the pessimistic view that nothing ever will.”

  “Maybe someday the right person will come along to help them. Someone they will really respond to. My brother Paul once took a man who had been an alcoholic for fifteen years and turned him completely around.”

  He watched her intently as she talked. He could almost see her unfolding her guardian angel wings. It was the one thing he wouldn’t allow.

  “Hallie . . .”

  Caught up in her plans, she paid him no mind. “There are many different ways to help people. Maybe…”

  “Hallie!”

  “What is it, Josh?” She had her chin tilted at such a stubborn angle he almost laughed. The sobering thought was that his dysfunctional family was certainly no laughing matter.

  He cupped her face. “I didn’t mean to yell at you, sweet.” His thumbs caressed her chin. “It’s not your concern. I won’t let you be involved.”

  She stood very still. What he was telling her, she thought, was that there were lines she couldn’t cross. Lovers had boundaries. Their only common ground was the bedroom. Everything else was separate, divided into territories—hers and his. She’d grown up in a family where there were almost no boundaries. Everybody, including the in-laws and the cousins, would do almost anything, make almost any sacrifice, to help a family member. That Josh didn’t have that saddened her almost beyond enduring.

  “I understand, Josh.” She reached up and covered his hands with hers. “Truly, I do.”

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Josh stayed the weekend.

  Sunday afternoon while she did some work on her long-neglected thesis, he disappeared on a mysterious errand. He had a paper bag in his hand when he came back, and he was grinning.

  She greeted him with an enormous hug, crushing the bag between them. “Hmmm, it feels as if you’ve been gone for years.”

  He rubbed his cheek against hers. “Same here.”

  She leaned back and looked up at him. “What’s in the bag?”

  “A present.”

  “Is it big as a bread box or small as a thimble?”