FIVE
Shea
I’d never seen The Redheaded Stepchild so packed outside of a Full Moon Fever Party. People cheered in the parking lot line as I walked to the back door for the fight. Adrenaline pulsed through my veins and I punched the air, trying to use some of my energy. If I didn’t, I got stiff and fought like shit. I needed to keep moving.
“Don’t you want to know who you’re fighting?” Major asked. With all his grumbling and wanting to be alpha, he made a perfect manager, and X was my biggest fan. I kicked ass, and they handled all the business shit.
“Don’t care.” I shuffled back and forth while we waited for Jacques, the club owner, to come to the door. It didn’t matter, I’d never lost a fight. There weren’t a lot of things I was good at, but fighting was my thing. I didn’t have a strategy, I knew what to do when I saw my opponent. It was like a dance, every move he made revealed his weaknesses to me. No formula, just divine intervention.
“He never listens.” X sighed, ignoring me. These two loved to talk like I couldn’t hear them. “He’ll be a cocky motherfucker until someone knocks some sense into him.”
“That’s not going to happen,” Jacques said when he opened the door. “But tonight you have your work cut out for you.”
I insisted we arrive close enough to fight time to drive my brothers batshit crazy for exactly this reason. People tried to psyche me out, including Jacques, who was going to pay his mortgage off the money I raked in for this place tonight.
X helped me gear up for the fight. He wrapped my hands, put my gloves on, and slipped the dental guard into my mouth. “Can I give you any advice?” X asked.
“Can I stop you?” I garbled around the guard.
X laughed. “Don’t do anything stupid, just for the money. Things are going good at the shop. And they’re working out at Forever Home. You come home grinning like an idiot. We like having this ugly mug around.” He whacked the side of my head before walking away.
I wouldn’t do anything stupid, and it was because of Forever Home. More specifically, Delaney. To see her sweet smile. For the first time, I actually wanted to go to work, be part of something bigger than myself. Every other time it was for the paycheck, and for my own pride.
Little by little Delaney was crawling out of her shell. I wished she was here tonight, sitting with my brothers in the middle of this giant crowd, so I could show her what I was really good at, besides taking care of animals or saying goofy shit to make her giggle. It was already my favorite noise in the world, hands down, because I knew how much it took for her to let go and do it. There were so many things about me that she wouldn’t understand, and I had to figure out a way to explain them to her before it was too late.
The crowd roared as my opponent and I were introduced. I could tell who those rich fuckers from Vegas were. Their mouths dropped, whispering to each other during our weigh in. My opponent was human, I knew it from the weight difference. Some giant Canadian oaf who had no idea what he was in for. From the way he moved, I guessed he’d been cut from his hockey team and was here to make a quick buck.
‘Lone Wolf’ wasn’t a cute nickname. He’d find that out real fast.
He never saw the first punch coming. But as his head cracked back from the impact of my glove, he knew that money fucking belonged to me.
Some guys trash talked me, thinking I got lucky, landing a blow like that. Canada agreed, although he was smart enough to keep it to himself. He turned bright red, his breath coming in rough angry pants. I moved a million miles an hour compared to him, but I’d never slow down to match his game. Sometimes that was a trick, too. I never changed my plan to accommodate anyone.
I kept him off-balance. Canada stumbled, landing a couple blows, one to my eye that stung like a bitch. I learned long ago I only needed one. He was slower than shit, and I took advantage of that, drumming my signature beat on his chest, knocking the air out of him. They were all the same, and the bad decisions came quick. I blocked his punches, landing more to his face and throat, before landing the final blow to his face.
Everyone’s nose made the same revolting sound when it broke. First the crack, and then the wet thump before Canada hit the ground. The busted nose wasn’t the only thing that did him in, but combined with the empty lungs and the bloody eyes, it was one hell of a nail in the coffin.
Counting to ten was a courtesy. These guys pissed me off, slow fucking humans feeling too much pain. I pulled my arm away from the judge, storming off the stage while everyone still cheered.
“What the fuck, Shea?” Major grabbed me. He was the only man I’d ever met quicker than me, he’d taught me everything I knew. “You won.”
“I’m not doing this anymore. It’s a fucking joke.” Even more of a joke, I had to hold up my hands and wait for Major to get me out of my gloves.
“What do you want? More money? The take of the bets should be pretty good. The place was packed.”
I glared past my brother. I couldn’t see the crowd anymore, but fuck those people for betting against me. “Some fucking respect.”
— — —
I’d always worked with guys. Loud, crude, and dirty. Everything Delaney wasn’t. She’d become my sweet little shadow, pink pompom like a cherry on top, teaching me the sign language words for the animals and working way harder than I ever expected her to. Survivors were kindred spirits, and she didn’t need words to tell me how precious this chance was to her. By the end of the week, she could milk Bessie and collect the eggs from the chickens without my help. At first she wouldn’t even go in the coop. It was huge, but I wouldn’t patronize her. I knew how that felt. Like no one expected people like us could actually do a good job. Fuck them.
In the beginning of the week, I’d catch her sneaking looks at me. Her eyes would dart so fast they’d be back on whatever she’d been working on immediately. I didn’t cut her any slack, and I’d hold the gaze as long as she was willing. Those blue eyes, protected by her frames, had so much to say. Day by day she got bolder, not looking away when she was caught. A slow smile would spread across her face, and she’d nibble on her bottom lip, which was as pink as that hat, like she wanted to take the whole thing back but couldn’t.
If she was any other girl, I’d pin her up against the stall and take her right there. Lay her down in the hay and go wild. But that was just it. She wasn’t any other girl. And that’s what had me going fucking crazy.
If I was better with words, I would’ve figured out a way to ask her what the hell did they do to you?
Monday morning and I was on top of the fucking world. A thousand bucks in my pocket, even if it was covered in bettor’s slime, did wonders for my attitude. Wolves healed quickly. The new skin on my knuckles was pink and shiny, although the cold would split them open this morning for sure. My shiner had faded enough that it would look like a shadow under the brim of my hat. If Delaney noticed it, I’d tell her the truth. It might scare her, but it wouldn’t do as much damage as a lie. That I wouldn’t be able to fix.
Delaney sat at Shadow’s desk, hard at work. She’d taken off her jacket, her hair free and falling down her shoulders. She chewed her lip, so lost in the project she didn’t look up when I came in.
“Whatcha doin’?” I asked, sitting on the edge of the desk. She didn’t leave me much room, colored pencils everywhere. I slid the paper away from her when she jumped, angling it so I could see the drawing.
She drew a man’s hand in grayscale, and this girl had some fucking talent. It looked like it could have come off the paper and grabbed me. His arm was engulfed in a flowering vine, the blooms vivid like fire bursts in orange and yellow. Butterflies kissed the petals, and—
Delaney slammed her hand over the image, her own hand so delicate in comparison to the photo. She snatched the paper away. She put her head down, her hair hung in her face, and I couldn’t read her expression.
Blood pounded in my eardrums in tandem with the echo of her hand landing on the paper. Delaney’s shoulders r
ose and fell with her breath.
“It’s incredible.” I broke the silence. She didn’t look up. “It looks real.”
She ripped a piece of paper from the pad and picked up a pencil. She pushed it at me when she was done writing.
The letters were shaky, confidence shattered, but the message almost sent me off the desk.
It’s you.
I steadied myself, looking back to Delaney. She wasn’t hiding anymore. Her body trembled, our gazes locked. Her lips parted, and but I knew I had to be the one to speak.
“I can’t stop thinking about you.” My words shook. They didn’t sound like they belonged to me. She gasped. “I’m scared too, Delaney. I’ve never felt this way before. You can’t run away from everything that scares you. If the butterflies in my stomach look anything like the ones you drew, they can’t be bad.”
She picked up the pencil again, holding it over the paper before writing. She curved her arm around the message, shielding it until she was ready for me to see it. I expected her to erase the words or crumple the paper and throw it away in frustration.
Delaney spent a lot of time with her own thoughts; she knew exactly what she wanted to say.
I dreamed about you. Your tattoos came alive. I think you use them as a shield. You don’t want people to see what you’re really like.
Holy fuck. “You’re right.” This girl had me turned inside out. “Because a lot of people aren’t worth the pain they cause you. I don’t have to tell you that. But you see through all the bullshit, don’t you?”
She nodded.
I picked up her hand and squeezed it. She laced her fingers between mine. That’s the picture she should’ve drawn. My busted knuckles intertwined with her feather soft fingers. She didn’t have calluses yet from the farm, and she never should. But I was too selfish to give up this time with her, it was the only way I could have her now. Not one person connected to us, Trina, Shadow, or my brother, wanted us together.
I’d never been one to do what other people wanted.
“What do you want to do about it?” I brushed my lips against her fingers. Delaney didn’t look away. She licked her lips, and I was dying to know how she tasted. Probably like spun sugar, one of those delicate Christmas candies that would melt on my tongue.
“Shea, what the fuck are you doing?” Shadow barged in, ruining everything.
To my surprise, Delaney didn’t let go. I hated to be the one to do it.
I adjusted my hat so he wouldn’t give me shit about my black eye and grabbed the picture. I was keeping that. “The same thing you are, buddy.”
SIX
Delaney
What did I want to do about it?
I clutched Shea’s hand as Shadow’s disapproval oozed over both of us. He was ruining it. It competed with the sensation of Shea’s lips against my skin. I was afraid Shadow could take that away from me, but my fingers still tingled, tattooed by Shea’s touch.
Shea let go. I was either too proud or afraid to take his hand back, do the same thing Trina did to Shadow every night. I wanted to kiss Shea. Trina looked so peaceful in Shadow’s arms. Like the world stopped spinning for that instant. That’s what I wanted. But I wasn’t ready.
If he didn’t want the same thing….I wasn’t bold enough to write that in a note. Every single thing I wrote was a chance to ruin this.
Shea dismissed Shadow, turning back to me and rolling his eyes. But his expression turned serious, golden gaze locked on mine, waiting for my answer.
I could write down all the things I wanted, but we’d be here all day. The animals waited for us. They were happy to see us every morning when we entered the barn. Shea laughed when I suggested it, and said they liked us because we made them comfortable.
Comfort wasn’t something to be taken for granted.
I reached for Shea’s hand again. He picked up each finger, running his own along each one. Like he was trying to figure out what I was made of. “I won’t push you to do anything you’re not ready for. I can come on like a ton of bricks—“
Shadow scoffed. “Understatement of the year.”
Shea shot a venomous side glance at him. “Don’t listen to that fucking guy. Don’t listen to any of them. Make up your own mind about me. If I’d walked away from you like Trina asked me to—and yes she did, Shadow—I would’ve quit this job already. You’re what’s keeping me here, Delaney. I like that you’re strong enough to make up your own mind. If you wind up thinking I’m a jackass, let me prove it to you. Don’t take their word for it.”
Nothing scared Shea. It was like a superpower.
I gripped his hand as hard as I could to see if I could get him to react. Blink. Anything.
Shea smiled, heat surging from our hands throughout my body, pooling and pulsing between my legs. “You’re brave, Delaney.”
Shadow watched the exchange with great interest, and maybe a little amusement. I didn’t know him well enough to tell.
“Come out with me tonight. Let’s go into town and look at the Christmas lights. Have you ever had a real Christmas?” Shea asked.
I’d had a lot of real bad Christmases, but that’s not what he meant. I shook my head.
“That’s it.” Shea stood, still holding my hand. I had to get up or he’d drag me across the desk in his excitement. “We’re going to have the best fucking Christmas ever. The biggest tree I can fit in the house, all the lights, colored of course, because only pussies get those icicle things, tons of ornaments. So much food we’ll all spontaneously combust. And you know what else? I want the Channings there. All the girls from Forever Home, too.”
“I think that’s a great idea,” Shadow said. “I think we could all use a good Christmas, after the year we had. It will be a fresh start.”
My eyes burned. I’d wanted that more than anything. I didn’t care about presents, but I wanted Christmas. A day of family, love, and all the things I’d never had. Shea had no idea what he was giving me by doing this.
“We do it in the forest. At our house. Show all the other packs that we’re working together and they better not screw with us.” Shea and Shadow looked at each other, mouths open. “Fuck. The full moon is on Christmas.”
“Shit.” Shadow looked over at me. “She doesn’t know, does she?”
“I don’t think so. But she needs to.”
I tossed my hands in the air, then ripped a piece of paper out of my notebook. Know what?
Shea sighed, anchoring himself on the desk by one leg. He took his hat off and raked his fingers through his hair. He had one hell of a black eye.
What happened to your face? I added.
“Trina will kill you if you fuck this up, Shea. You’ll have a matching set of shiners. Choose your words wisely,” Shadow warned.
Shea motioned for me to come over to him. My heart pounded. I’d only been here a week, but already I was so attached to Shea. Who would want to hurt him? I knew the others were keeping something from me. There was always that look bouncing around, like someone needed to say something, but no one was sure what.
I stepped toward him, close enough that his body heat chased away the chill of anticipation. I picked up the notebook again. I spent seven years in a crate. Whatever you have to tell me can’t be worse than that.
“No, but it won’t seem any less fucked up.” Shea sighed.
I wasn’t scared. That was the thing that stood out the most. When Shea was around, I knew no one would hurt me. I brought my fingers up to his face. I’d only touched his hands before. His energy flowed into me, even though he held his breath. The skin on his cheek was so much softer than his fingers, and I ran my fingers down to the stubble on his jaw before tracing the outline of the bruise under his eye. The lid was swollen too, I hadn’t noticed that before.
“I fight,” he said softly. “I’m an amateur boxer. That’s how I make money.”
“That’s not the only time you fight,” Shadow added.
Shea glared at him, turning away from my touch. “Yo
u have blood on your hands too, buddy. We did the same fucking thing. You took out the right guy. Mine was a mistake.”
I backed away from Shea. This was much more than boxing. The room seemed small, full of these two massive men and their secrets. And it was about to swallow me.
“You’re scaring her.” Shadow approached me. I shrugged away from his touch. He’d meant to comfort me, but the blood they were talking about, it would stain. “Have a seat, Delaney. I know it sounds scary, but no one’s going to hurt you.”
My body tensed painfully. This was the first time since I’d come here I felt real fear. The kind when there’s no way out, and fighting made it worse. I learned that the hard way.
Shadow didn’t try to diminish what Shea said. Here it was, the catch. The thing that ruined the too good to be true. The niggling little feeling I had all along in the back of my brain was coming out to play.
I didn’t sit.
Shadow handed me the notebook. “What kind of books do you like to read? As soon as you get home, you curl up on the couch and you don’t put your tablet down until you fall asleep. It’s got to be something good.”
I wasn’t sure where he was going with this, but I wasn’t going to argue. Romance.
Shea peeked at the paper and grinned. “The dirty ones?”
Shadow rolled his eyes. I shrugged but I couldn’t fight my smile. The dirtier the better.
“Yes.” Shea put his hand up to high five me, closing his fingers over mine. Things felt right again when I was holding his hand. “I’m going to ask you all about those. See if there’s anything I missing.”
A different kind of tension twisted with the fear in the pit of my stomach.
Shea’s expression softened. “Relax, Delaney. You’re safe with us.”
The more he said it, the less I believed it.
“Do you ever read about werewolves, or any other shape shifters?” Shadow asked.
Sugar, Spice, and Shifters: A Touch of Holiday Magic Page 37