by Bry Ann
His eyes soften. “Then we’ll do it more often, Lace. Now, up you go.”
“Whattt… Eeek!”
My words morph into a squeal as he scoops me up off the ground to cradle me in his arms.
“We need to talk first, and it’s gonna be tough, but I promise when we’re done, I’ll watch Harry Potter Two with you until you fall asleep. ”
He continues to gently rub my hair back. So safe...
“It’s Chamber of Secrets. Not two,” I whisper dreamily.
He laughs. “Oh, Lace, you aren’t going to last ten minutes into that movie.”
“Yes, I am.”
He runs his fingers over my eyes. “No, you aren’t. Even ten minutes is being generous.”
I frown and cross my arms over my chest. He doesn’t even flinch at the change in my arm placement. His muscles tense underneath me, but I don’t think he notices. When we get to our room, he gently places me down on the bed. Before pulling away, he strokes his thumb over my cheek in silence. His eyes carry so much sadness.
“Where do you want to talk, little dove?” He asks softly.
“Um…” I suddenly feel nervous. I know the look Adam’s giving me right now. Fairytale’s over.
“The bath. I don’t care that I’ve taken one already. Just… let’s go in and we’ll talk there. Hold me.”
“Of course,” he whispers. He kisses down my neck before finding the hem of my sweatshirt and pulling it off. He chuckles when he sees that I have nothing but my sports bra on underneath.
“What? I wasn’t planning on stripping out there.”
“I’m not saying anything.”
He runs his hands down my stomach before finding my sweats and sliding them off my body. His eyebrows shoot up when he sees… yeah, I’m bare under there, too.
“Clearly you weren’t planning on stripping off any layers.”
“Told you.”
Adam rolls his eyes with a smirk before leaving me to do his thing. I stand off to the side and watch as he strips off his clothes one layer at a time. Gone is the sweet man who read Harry Potter to our child or the sexy man who whispered those seductive words to me. His movements are firm and fast as he strips his body of the suit he traps himself in every day. There’s nothing sexy about it, except maybe perhaps the fact his body is sexy in and of itself.
Without a word, he places his hand on my arm and leads me to the tub. He’s gentle, but disconnected, as he lifts me up and over the edge of the porcelain tub. I curl up, hating the feeling of the cold air against my skin. Adam quickly turns on warm water and crawls in with me. He crawls in behind me and pulls me back against him, doing just as I asked, holding me.
“So, Miguel,” he says when the water reaches my waist.
I sigh and try to channel the woman inside me who can cope with this.
“I understand why you don’t want me involved…”
He spins me around suddenly. “You do?”
I nod slowly. “Yes, I do. But… Adam, I can’t sit back. I get why you don’t want me to involve myself. I totally do. I have an emotional tie and that makes me vulnerable, but...” I bite the inside of my cheek so hard I feel blood seep out. “He laid his hands on me. He hurt me. Bad. Worse, he laughed as others tormented me. As I cried and screamed and begged for help. I can’t just let you handle this. I need to know that I played a part in him never seeing the light of day again. I have to. So I can stop seeing his face in my nightmares. I can….”
My voice becomes small.
“So I can stop seeing his father’s face as he forced himself inside me.”
Goosebumps run over my skin. The memory floats back to the surface of my mind like it was yesterday. The teasing. The feel of his hands on me, in me. They look so similar. So, so similar. That is probably why I reacted so strongly to him in the restaurant. I…
I’m gonna be sick.
I jump, leaning over the side of the tub. The only thing keeping me from vomiting all over the tile is I didn’t eat my food earlier so there’s nothing left in my stomach to throw up. I dry heave over the side of the tub, the cold porcelain pushing into my stomach.
“I’m here. I’m here,” Adam says, but he chokes on his words. I can tell he’s trying not to cry. He’s not a man to cry. Ever. But for me he does.
His hands stroke up and down my spine as I continue to dry heave. I feel the sickness start to lift, slowly but surely. When I’m done, I flop back in the tub. Adam catches me and pulls me back into him. He massages me all over.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “That’s kind of manipulation.”
A dry laugh bursts out of Adam as he shakes his head. “You’re perfect.”
“Far from it.”
An awkward silence settles over both of us. Adam’s hand absentmindedly traces over one of my burns as he thinks. Gone is the joking banter, Adam is deep in thought, thinking as the mafia boss he is. Trying to balance being my husband and being the Boss, the Don. I don’t want him to let me help just because I’m his broken wife; I want him to let me help because he understands my need to seek justice for myself. I want him to see I’m capable of doing this.
“Lacey, I can’t lose you.”
I hang my head. “I know, Adam.”
“So I need you to be so careful.”
What? I throw my head up and whirl around.
“What? You’re letting me…?”
He grabs my face, brushing his thumb across my cheek once. “I get it, Lace. I get it. But I need you to be so fucking careful. I can’t lose you,” his voice breaks, “but we are a team, and you have the right to seek peace and justice in all this. You’re great with computers. Bottom line. Better than nearly all my men. You’ll help me acquire information. Hack into systems I need. But Lace, when we’re on the job, this job, you listen to me and you report to me. You know how I work and who I am. You prepared for that? I don’t have time to reign myself in because you’re on the scene now. Frankly, I can’t afford to do that.”
I brush him off with a wave of my hand. “I can handle you.”
He smirks slightly, but I can tell it’s forced.
“We have a daughter, babe. Don’t forget. You put yourself full force into things. Especially this. Don’t forget that your life isn’t expendable.”
I try to open my mouth to speak, but he holds up a hand.
“I can’t raise a daughter on my own. I can’t. And I hate to admit this, I fucking hate it,” he growls, “but this Miguel kid is smart. Very smart. There’s a reason we’ve always had trouble taking down the Castellos, and unfortunately, this kid is not an exception. He’s going to try to use your weaknesses against you: your emotional tie to this, Rose, me, even Sven, everyone you love. He’s going to try to draw you away. I don’t care what you see, what you find on that computer of yours, you always come to me first. You hear me? I don’t care what the threat is. We figure it out together. Tell me you understand.”
“I understand.”
“Lacey…”
I crawl on his lap and cup his face, feeling his erection against my thigh. “Love me,” I whisper.
“I believe you promised me a favor… or points, whatever it was.”
“Are you cashing them in, Ruston?”
“Definitely,” he murmurs, dragging his teeth along my lower lip. “Up you go.”
He grabs under my arms and lifts me up right along with him, showing no signs of strain. He plops me on the other side of the tile, running off to grab a towel. Water droplets slip off my body, flooding the floor. Usually he’d care, but he doesn’t right now. He has a singular focus. I shiver as I bite my lips and wrap my arms around my body.
I hate being cold. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it…. Warmth.
A fluffy towel wraps around my body. I moan as I tuck it around my sides. I love these towels. I love them so much.
I’m pulled from my love affair with the cushy towel when I hear Adam groaning next to me.
“Lacey, don’t make that sound. Hurry
up and dry off. Jesus.”
I glance over at him and see his obvious hard-on straining against his towel. I walk over to him, eyes hooded, smiling. I kiss his nose.
“You hurry.”
I think we both towel off at record speed. I definitely did. I love these fluffy towels, and very few things can pull me away from them before I am ready. In fact, there are only two things I can think of:
Danger.
Sex with Adam. Especially when he’s giving me the tingles like he is right now.
Honestly, less than two minutes later, I’m on the bed, a leg lazily wrapped around Adam’s ankle as his weight presses into me, his lips and tongue dancing with mine.
“I love you. Thank you,” I whisper. He just grunts, grinding his hips into me.
“I need you. Adam, I need you.”
He pulls back and searches my eyes. I don’t know what exactly he’s looking for, but whatever it is, he finds it. He leans down, planting his lips on mine. His lips are soft and gentle as his other hand comes down between our mingled legs and softly teases my clit. I try to move against his hand, but he crushes his hips into me so I can’t move much.
“Adam…”
“Shh, it’s my favor we’re cashing in. Remember?”
“Meh.”
That’s all I can really get out of my mouth. He chuckles and moves his hand away to tease my opening.
“Is this what you want?”
“Yes, please,” I moan. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been this sexually desperate. The look on Adam’s face lets me know he’s thinking the same thing.
“I’ve missed you,” I whisper, like that explains my sudden increase in sex drive.
“I’m not complaining,” he whispers back, nipping my ear.
The moan that escapes is actually so loud that Adam grins and slides inside me the slightest bit.
“How’s that feel?”
“Good. Really good. Please, more. Adam, more!”
“You wanna be fucked, little dove?” He chuckles. Gosh, he never speaks to me this way. What is he doing to me?
“I… what’s happening?” I whisper as he slides inside me the tiniest bit more.
I see the exact moment my question registers. Adam’s eyes change. All pretenses of humor slip away. He slides out of me and lays his elbows down by my ears so he’s hovering right over me. Gently, he moves a loose strand of my hair back.
“You’re healing, babe. I think… I think you’re becoming who you always would have been if nothing had ever happened to you.”
His finger is still tracing my cheek, grounding me.
“So, the real me is, like, super horny, but because I went through all the bad stuff, I wasn’t really as interested in sex.”
Adam’s lip twitches, even though I’m completely serious! He’s trying desperately to hide his amusement, but I know him too well. He can’t hide that stuff from me.
“Yeah, something like that. That’s my observation.”
“Hmmm,” I think on that for a second. It’s really hard for me to wrap my mind around that. I mean, I just thought I didn’t really love sex as much as everyone else, but I guess I do. Captivity just ruined it for me. This is… strange. My body is strange. I feel like someone else lives inside it now, someone much less meek.
The sound of low, deep laughter cuts through my thoughts. My eyes flick up and I see Adam staring at me. He’s cracking up. His eyes are bright and shimmering, and his head is thrown back, exposing his thick, masculine throat. I bite my lip and laugh too when I realize I’ve had my face scrunched up, staring out in the distance, thinking for at least a solid minute. With him right there on top of me.
Awkward. I close my eyes for a moment, before turning back to him sheepishly.
“Um… that makes a lot of sense.”
“You sure?” He laughs. “It seemed to confuse you immensely.”
Okay, funny.
“Yes,” I say, leaning up to kiss him. “It does. It’s just strange.”
“Mood killed, or can we continue?” He’s still chuckling.
“Oh, please continue. Don’t let me stop you. I believe I still owe you.”
“Yes, I think you do, but you know you can get away with much more than everybody else. So if you’re not feeling it today, I’ll call a truce.”
He grins. He knows there is no way I can back out of this now. I’m horny, and this been stalled for too long already.
“Oh, I’m no quitter.”
He smiles before attacking my face, lips on lips, hand in hand.
“You’re perfect,” he says in a low, rumbly voice as he kisses down my collarbone.
“Adam, please…”
He looks at me softly, and, cupping my face with one hand, he slides inside me inch by inch.
“Adam, this feels so good. Oh my… Geez!”
I’m on fire. My body is alive!
His hand slides down my stomach without intention, simply running down the length of my body. This is so different than anything we’ve done before.
I’m a livewire. He’s doing that to me.
With one fluid motion, he thrusts into me, slow at first, careful as always, but soon a lust overcomes both of us like never before. We stop talking, and our heavy breathing fills the room. His pace picks up; slow, medium, fast, until he’s brutally thrusting inside me like he can solve all our problems through sex alone. I’m so close, hanging off the precipice, when he lets out a loud grunt.
“Lacey, I’m gonna come. I need you to go first.”
His pace picks up so much I know I’ll bruise. I don’t care. I don’t care at all. I need this. I’m gonna fall so hard, but I know he’ll catch me. I know.
“Adam, please…” Help. It’s too much. Too much! He grunts again, feeling the exact same way. He’s holding off for me.
His hand slides down, finds my clit, and presses hard. I shatter. We both do. Letting go at the exact time, catching each other until the room is nothing more than heavy breathing and satisfied sighs.
I have no words.
That was incredible.
And I enjoyed it. No flashbacks, no feelings of disgust or shame. Everything I felt was good. Everything I felt was because of him. His hands. His love. His passion. His need. His thrusts. Him inside me.
Adam rolls to the side and cups my face.
“You okay, little dove? That was…”
I nod. “I’m fine.”
My voice barely works. What just happened? I’m still shaking, but Adam’s still holding me, so I’m okay. I know I am.
“Good, because I hope to repeat that in the very near future.”
Adam wears a devilish smile.
I’ll die.
Literally, I will.
As the mood dies off, the weight of our previous conversation starts to fill the room.
“Lacey?” Adam sighs.
“Yeah?”
“You know everything going on with Miguel, what you are choosing to involve yourself in…”
His voice goes cold… brutal… deadly...
“It’s war.”
Rose
The second I saw lust flicker behind the joy in Sven’s eyes, I pulled away. I retreated, backing myself into the edge of the bed. God, I never realized I had so many issues with my body. Maybe because I was always skinny, I didn’t realize I wouldn’t love myself any other way. I mean, why am I even thinking about my body at a time like this? Why do I care what Sven thinks?
Of course I care, he’s always been my exception. The slip in my well-maintained mask of sanity.
I grab the nearest pillow and use it to block my midsection. I want him to stop looking at me. I want him to stop making me feel. It’s like no time has passed at all. The same dilemma whirls around in my mind. Love, lust, guilt, crime, passion, hurt…
“Oh, Rose.” My head snaps up to meet his dark eyes. “Why are you hiding from me?”
How does he always read me so easily? How? I’ve been a speck for a year. A piece of
dust no one sees. People try to fix, but don’t actually see. I’ve been empty since my father broke my heart, and what did I do? I dove into that emptiness by running away from the nightmare that makes me feel. It’s safe in that hollow pit of nothingness.
“Sven, just stop.”
He smiles… like he’s enjoying this! Of course he is. Of freaking course. He takes a step forward.
“Sven, stop. Stop. I’m not the same. Please.”
He studies me for a second. In two second flat, I see it all click. Like I’m a hard drive and he just read the file.
“You got help.”
“Sven…” I feel my cheeks heat. I yank the pillow in tighter. Sven cocks his head to the side.
“You’re insecure.”
He sounds confused by this. Is he not looking at me?
“Wow, okay. I can’t believe this is the first issue at hand, but let’s deal with it.”
He rolls his eyes and starts walking forward. Oh god, no! I leap on the bed and hold out the pillow in front of me.
“Sven, you stay away from me! I’m not kidding.”
He laughs that low and deep, dark laugh I know so well. His eyes look so damn happy, I have to look away from them or they’ll do something to me. Something I can’t feel. I’m leaving. Going back to my waitress life.
“God, I missed you.”
Heart squeeze. “Stay away, you asshole!”
He smirks and grabs my ankle. I scream as I fall backward on the mattress, and he drags me to the end. I hug the pillow back in, but as soon as my legs are dangling over the edge, he yanks the pillow away. I try to wrap my arms around myself, but then he’s pulling me up and gripping my sides. I try to kick his nuts, but he laughs and twists away. I don’t give up fighting.
“Let me go! You’re literally such an asshole! If your stupid boss hadn’t guilt tripped me into coming here, I never would have had to see you again!”
I kick at his nuts again, but this time, he catches my foot and sets it down.
“Aw, what a shame that would have been,” he says, still grinning, still looking at me like I’m the funniest damn thing in the world.
“Oh, you’d live.”
Something happens when I say that. He pulls away and stares at me, jaw dropped. I take the opportunity to grab the pillow again. I feel okay when it’s there.
