by CJ Roberts
“He mapped out what he wanted, I said thanks but no thanks, and we parted ways.”
Megan looked over my face and she unleashed a dazzling smile. “That all?”
I nodded.
“Then why are your lips all swollen like someone has been kissing the hell out of you?”
My eyes went wide.
“You let him touch you! Kate, that’s awesome!”
I rushed to the mirror. My lips were puffy and there was even a slight redness to my chin where his stubble had scraped me. There it was, staring back at me: proof that Adam Kinkade had kissed me. The sight made tingles spread beneath my skin.
“I’d say he likes you.” Megan smiled.
My phone buzzed with a text. I opened the message and all the blood left my head.
I can still smell you…
I was holding morning office hours. Professor Martin was lecturing in one of his several classes. I hadn’t seen much of him and based on the schedule, probably wouldn’t. Technically, I should be working on my thesis. Instead, I was doing Google searches on Adam Kinkade.
About forty-seven bazillion hits came up, many with photos of him looking hot in a tux at high-profile events and charity auctions. The one common denominator in almost all the pictures was a stunning woman standing by his side. Never the same woman twice, but a woman nonetheless. Out of all the images, he never fully smiled in any of them.
I scrolled through the most reputable information available. Aside from finding out he had an actual fan club, his personal life was pretty vague.
His mother died when he was ten and his stepfather, who had legally adopted him two years prior, raised Adam until he had been removed and put into foster care at age twelve. There was nothing else on why Adam had been put into the system.
My heart sank a little for him. I had done some volunteer mentoring work with foster kids at the Children’s Home. Most kids struggled and had a hard time coping. I thought of Adam as a child, with blue eyes and dark hair, being bounced from one place to another. No siblings or information on his biological father. He had been a child prodigy. Apparently he was insanely smart, graduating from high school at sixteen with a full academic scholarship to Northwestern. He got into the stock market at twenty-two and boomed from there. Founded Kinkade Enterprises at twenty-five. To say Mr. Kinkade was impressive would be an understatement.
“Holy crap.” CEO of Kinkade Enterprises. He held stock in several companies, as well as diversifying into real estate. Megan hadn’t been kidding when she said he owned half of Chicago. Amongst them was that restaurant he had taken me to the other night.
I exhaled and shut my laptop. The man made no sense. He was powerful, calm, and obviously used to getting his own way while saying as few words as possible. But then he donated to charities and lost control in restaurant bathrooms. In fairness, it was the hall outside the bathroom, but still.
Maybe Megan was right. Sometimes things just needed a chance to get off the ground before you could truly know what you could handle. But even if that were true, did I want to risk the attempt? With a guy like Adam Kinkade? His whole life freaked me out. My uncle and aunt were wealthy, so I knew about money, but I’d never had any. My father left when I was a baby and the only time I talked to my mother was when she called asking for money or I dropped off groceries at her house.
Megan and Brian were supportive, but in the end, the idea of giving in and possibly getting caught up—consumed—by another terrified me. Being left wanting more than I could have or handle wasn’t something I wanted to experience. I didn’t know much about the opposite sex, but it was clear that Adam was a lot to take on and not easily forgettable.
My phone buzzed. The caller I.D. read: Kink.
Maybe it was juvenile, but that’s the label I’d given him when I programmed his number last night.
I took a deep breath and answered.
“Hello, Katelyn. How are you today?”
“Fine, thank you. What can I do for you, Adam?” My goal was to sound professional and completely unaffected by his voice. Thank God he couldn’t see my hands tremble.
I heard his smirk. “Now that you mention it, you can—”
“Never mind,” I hissed.
“I was going to ask you to join me for dinner, but I like where your dirty mind was going.”
“I wasn’t thinking anything dirty.”
“Don’t lie to me, Katelyn.”
His voice was rough and deep. Even over the phone he could make me shudder. “You don’t give up easily.”
“It is not in my interest to insult you. But I cannot amend my entire process and daily life to accommodate all your wishes. I am attempting to find a middle ground.”
“Why?”
“Because I want you.”
“And what exactly do you want with me?”
“I thought we’d been over this.”
“So it is just about sex?”
“I can’t say for certain. You intrigue me and I’d like to spend time with you and get to know you better. How much better would be up to you.”
I thought about all those women he had been photographed with. Some weird anger I had no right to feel flared. “I’m not what you want, Adam.”
“I haven’t heard the word no come out of your mouth. Have dinner with me tonight.”
I flipped my planner open and checked my schedule. Since my office hours ended early today, I’d promised my six-year-old cousin Simon that I’d take him to the zoo for the afternoon. I’d have enough time afterward to shower and change before going to work. Though I would have loved to play hooky and go out to dinner with Adam, I couldn’t cancel work on short notice. I needed all the hours I could get anyway.
“I’m sorry, I can’t do dinner tonight.”
He was silent for a long moment. “Good-bye, Katelyn.”
The line went dead. Had I just turned down something I wouldn’t get a chance at again? The thought made me sick.
“You’re going to be here this weekend to help me set up for the party, right?”
I had just walked through my aunt Grace’s front door. “Yes, I’ll be here to help.”
Simon race down the stars and run toward me. He threw himself into my arms and I swept him up in a hug. “You ready to see the zoo, buddy?”
“Yeah!” Both his little hands shot into the air.
“Go get your coat.”
He took off for his room again.
“Zoo today? That’ll be fun for you two,” Grace said as she looked over the mail on the counter. Her light brown hair was pulled back into a bun and her khaki slacks were perfectly pressed. She was two years younger than my mother and looked similar. Grace didn’t have to work due to her husband’s success in real estate. She had been pregnant with Simon the summer I’d moved in with them. Going from my mother’s house to my aunt’s should have been a step up. But, like everything, it came with complications.
“Your uncle is looking forward to seeing you at the party.”
Bile rose in my throat. Tim St. Roy was married to my aunt, but I would never call him Uncle. There was something evil lurking in that man. In high school, right after I had moved in, he came home drunk one night and “accidentally” wandered into my room. I could still smell the whiskey on his breath and feel his sweaty hand run down my back.
I stifled a disgusted tremor. Being snuck up on while sleeping was something I was used to and the moment I’d felt his hands on me, I awoke throwing fists. He ran out of my room and the next day, made it very clear that if I told Grace, he would deny it. “Who do you think she’ll believe? Her husband or her crazy sister’s fucked-up kid?”
He had been right. Grace wouldn’t have believed me, but the punch I’d landed on Tim’s face seemed to keep him out of my room. It didn’t, however, stop the sideways looks or the prickle of unease every time he was near. Anxiety crept up my spine and hummed through my bones just thinking about it.
“Have you talked to your mother recently?
” Grace asked, pulling me out of my dark thoughts.
“Not in the last few weeks. Something wrong?”
Grace sighed and shook her head. “She was babbling something about getting kicked out of her apartment.”
“What? Why?” She paid her rent, mostly because I helped her. I wasn’t about to tell Grace that, though. She looked at my mother like something she’d scrape off the bottom of her designer shoe.
“I don’t know, Katelyn. I don’t even know if it’s the truth or another one of her scams.”
“Ready!” Simon shouted, running into the room again, this time with his coat.
Grace waved us off and, taking Simon’s hand, I looked forward to the next few hours with my sweet little prince. Because after that, I’d have to stop by my mother’s apartment and find out what the hell was going on.
I dropped off Simon. Unfortunately, we had cut the zoo trip short when Simon complained about his tummy hurting. He didn’t have a fever but he’d eaten pizza before I picked him up. Simon was lactose intolerant. Nothing serious, but it made him uncomfortable.
Driving north and finally getting inside Chicago city limits, I pulled up at my mother’s apartment complex. Her car wasn’t there, but a big SOLD sign was plastered to the side of her building.
In fact, the entire block of low-income apartments wore the same banner: Purchased by Kinkade Enterprises.
“No. Frickin. Way.”
Stepping on the gas, I drove with such furious intent that my vision blurred. It was four o’clock on a Friday evening. With only an hour before I had to be at work, I sped toward the one person I wanted to see…and demand answers from.
5
My idea had been to burst into Adam’s office and demand to know why he’d bought out an entire block of apartment complexes, one of which housed my mother. But the Kinkade building was massive and security was tight. The front desk had to call up to another desk, which had to call Mr. Kinkade’s executive assistant which eventually led me to be escorted up to the 40th floor and private office of Adam Kinkade.
Okay, so my dramatic entrance didn’t pan out the way I had originally planned. But I was still fueled with anger so I slammed through his door and stomped in. The breath momentarily left me. He was sitting, cool and calm, behind a large desk with the skyline of Chicago as a backdrop, seeping with soul-shaking power.
He didn’t appear shocked or even annoyed. Granted, the fourteen calls from security to warn him of my impending wrath might have tipped him off.
“You can’t just—”
“Enough.” He put his hand up and stood, pushing his chair backward. A painful gulp stuck to my esophagus. Now he was pissed and I hadn’t even said a whole sentence.
He rounded the desk and stalked toward me. He wasn’t wearing his jacket. His dark blue vest and pants looked like the ocean at midnight and did crazy things for the color of his eyes. A long-sleeved white shirt and black tie completed the look. He stood before me, smelling like amazing cologne and money. The force of his presence hit me hard.
He was gorgeous. His perfectly combed black hair made me want to plunge my fingers through it and mess it up like I had the night at the restaurant. His face was like chiseled stone, and though he looked irritated, he was still starkly beautiful. His light blue eyes were such a dramatic contrast to his dark features it was breathtaking.
He looked me in the eye. Heat radiated from his body and surrounded mine. He wasn’t a man, he was a force of nature. A smart girl would be afraid, at the very least cautious. But once again, when it came to this man, the only thing I felt was anticipation.
“Don’t you dare open your mouth and attempt to tell me what I can and cannot do while you stand in my office.” His gaze drifted from my mouth to my hips and back again. Since I hadn’t lectured today, I was in a pair of jeans and a sweater, and probably smelled like the zoo. What did he think of me? Casual and unkempt? If he thought anything, his expression didn’t show it.
Everywhere his gaze hit, heated me from the inside out. It was thrilling. How could a single look make me feel sexy? A sudden empty feeling overwhelmed me. I took a deep breath and tried to squeeze my thighs together without being too obvious. My clit pulsed and I wondered if this kind of reaction to a man was normal. Normal or not, the truth was that Adam Kinkade affected me, and I had the wet panties to prove it.
“We play by my rules in here, Katelyn.” He reached behind me and locked his office door. “Kneel.”
“What?” I snapped. “There’s no way—”
“You obviously came here to discuss something with me. But you’ve offended me. My time is valuable. You want me to listen? Then you’ll speak on your knees.”
My heart pumped double time and that ache between my legs throbbed harder at the way those words rolled off his tongue, smooth like molasses with a sharp bite of cayenne. I was compelled to obey—wanted to. The need that shot through me then was clear. Pure, raw lust. It rushed beneath my skin so acutely it through off my balance.
I went down on my knees.
“Good girl.” He circled me slowly.
He was making it clear that my control didn’t apply here. I was on his turf. At his mercy. His to do with as he wanted. He decided how to treat me.
I should have felt frantic. Submit to someone else’s control? Never. But kneeling before him, I almost felt like a burden had been lifted, and my anxiety was replaced with anticipation. I felt vulnerable, but safe. Adam was a conundrum I couldn’t quite figure out. Neither did I understand how he managed to push my limits without frightening me. There I was, on my knees, yet I felt a sense of power that was not my own. It was his, and I was feeding from it.
What would he do? Make me do? The thought didn’t terrify me, it excited me. And I was so turned on my body was nearly shaking.
How did he do it? I ran from everyone else…everything else that even threatened my tightly tethered sense of balance. And if I couldn’t run, I fought. Control over my sanity was the only thing worth clinging to. The only proof I had that showed I was still okay. That I was not sick like my mother. And Adam pulled at it as though it were something tangible. I was losing the fight. Giving in…letting him take over.
“The time for games is over, Katelyn. I’ve given you ample opportunity to accede to my wishes, yet you defy me at every turn.”
“Are you high? You can’t just demand things from people and expect them to do what you want.”
He went down on his haunches and looked me straight in the eye. “I expect a straight answer. I have been honest with you about what I want. You have not told me no, merely strung me along.”
There was no way anyone could string this man along. He was too grounded and wore his commanding presence like a layer of lotion. Power was a part of chemical makeup.
No. Stringing Adam Kinkade on was not possible. The fact that this was his interpretation baffled me. “I don’t know what I want. I just know what a wise versus unwise decision looks like.”
“You want me.”
My eyes widened.
“Don’t you?”
I nodded.
“Answer me.”
“Yes.” My voice trembled on the words. “Yes, I want you.”
He trailed his fingertip over my bottom lip. “Now we’re getting somewhere. So you want me, yet you think being with me is unwise.”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
Because you’re beyond anything I know how to deal with. Because I’m excited and afraid to have a taste of you and be left wanting more. Because I already have a fascination that borders on obsession. Because no one will ever have the power to hurt me again.
Instead, I went with, “Lots of reasons.”
He looked at me for a long time. Finally, he rose. He began to walk around me, pausing to lift a lock of my long hair and examine it.
“I’ve never seen a color like this.”
“Red?”
He scoffed. “Red is too tame a word.” He dropped the t
endril. His fingertips trail across the back of my neck. “And your skin is like a pearl. Polished. Radiant. Combined with those emerald eyes, I’d think you some kind of treasure chest of wealth.”
My breath stilled and my lungs burned from lack of air. His words startled me. No one had ever said anything like that to me before. Growing up next to Megan, a tall, thin blonde, I was typically noticed by how I stood out in the awkward ways. Somehow, Adam Kinkade, a mogul who spent time with supermodels, had just made me feel beautiful.
“You don’t like that I see you?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You tensed up.”
My eyes squeezed shut of their own accord. As if telling me that sensory overload was approaching. I shook my head, trying to gain composure. I had come here for a reason. Instead of focusing on that, I was getting sucked in again. I needed my anger. My irritation. And I needed to unleash it on him.
“Stop hovering over me and inspecting me. I’m not some thing you can obtain.”
“I disagree.”
My gazed snapped to his. “Fuck you.”
He wrapped my hair around his fist and gently pulled. “In time, sweetheart.”
Holding my hair, he faced me so I could look up at him. I felt his power over me. His stare trailed down my body. Could he see how hard my nipples were and the goose bumps on my skin?
“You like this,” he rasped. It was a statement, not a question. Adam was very clear on the effect he had on me. “I’m learning quickly, Katelyn. How you behave and how your moods change. Whatever it is you’re hiding that is making you run from me—” He pulled a little harder and I gasped. The tiny flare of pain pricked from my scalp all the way to the tips of my breasts, hardening the little peaks even more. “—I’m going to break you of that.”
He faced me fully and cupped my chin. My whole body was vibrating like a drumroll, begging for this man’s attention, any way he wanted to give it. For some reason, I felt the need to earn it. My mind and body were at odds—fighting the very things I wanted so desperately.
Acceptance.
