Luna had been living with anger and fear for so long, her first instinct was to say she didn’t need anymore, that denial was her happy place. But that kind of thinking, that fear, kept her in the position she’d been in for too long. Even though she’d been scared of the outcome of admitting to her parents that she’d been molested, and she’d been right to be scared, it still had to come out. Because the anticipation that she might actually be right was worse than actually being right.
“Tell me,” she requested definitely, and saw the approving respect on Kammy’s face.
“The jails are small because we have some pretty hard and fast laws that are applied. Justice is meted out quickly. No lingering appeals. No living off other people’s hard work.”
Luna forced herself not to rub her arms as a sudden chill settled over her.
Wait and listen. Maybe it’s not what you’re thinking...and she recalled what Bishop said. Don’t react. Take it in. You never know when information you’re given would be useful. Don’t give anyone a reason not to give you good info ever again.
“Well, that’s a good thing,” she forced out.
“It is. If you’re found guilty of a petty crime, you spend time working until your debt’s paid off. If it’s something more hardcore...”
“Like rape?”
“Like rape. Murder. We have executions. Everyone knows about it.”
Luna stilled. Pictured the man who raped her repeatedly and knew that if execution had been an option, she would’ve wanted it. Not only because of what he’d done to her, but because he’d probably hurt the other girls too.
Kammy rubbed her shoulder. “Justice is important. I don’t believe men who rape can be rehabilitated. Keller agrees with me.”
Luna tried to rectify the human trafficking she’d thought Keller was into with this and failed. But she didn’t say anything about that, asking instead, “Who decides?”
“We’ve got some former judges living here. If it’s not something easily proven with video, DNA evidence or witnesses, then we bring in the judges. Plus Keller. Myself. Sometimes a random sampling of people.”
“Are you ever worried about being wrong?”
“Who isn’t? But, Luna, I’d rather save lives than worry about potential mistakes. There’s no room for predators here. It would be far too easy for them to flourish.” She softened. “We don’t normally pull people out of a crowd and execute them. There has to be a complaint for an investigation to start.”
“Does everyone really know about this?”
“A lot of people ask to move here because of it. That’s why there’s less crime here than most places these days. Beyond that, people are happy. Happy people want to stay happy.”
It was beginning to sound like some kind of too-happy cult, but Luna took a sip of her refreshed coffee mug instead of saying something she’d regret.
“What do you do in Defiance when someone breaks the law?” Kammy asked.
She thought about Hammer killing Lil’jon when he was attempting to kidnap Jessa. And Caspar killing Lance and Roan. Those men had all gotten what they’d deserved...and she guessed it was no different than a public, planned execution.
“Pretty much the same thing these days,” she concurred. She wanted to say it was mostly outsiders bringing in the problem, but to her horror, when she thought back to all the violence, for the four years and beyond, she realized that simply wasn’t the case. “You’ve given me a lot to think about.”
“You’re a smart woman, Luna. You need to be challenged. I think, between Bishop and Keller’s, that can happen.” Kammy smiled. “In a more selfish vein, I need some women friends who are interested in things beyond sex and I’d love to learn more about cars.”
Chapter Twenty
Bishop was waiting for her outside Kammy’s. She didn’t know how long he’d been there, but it was long enough that she could feel the tension vibrating off him. There wasn’t a smile when he took her arm—more gently than she’d have thought—and led her across the compound like an errant child.
She didn’t want to cause another scene, so she let him until they were halfway across the compound, and then she stopped and told him, “Don’t you ever treat me like that again.”
“You’re fucking kidding me, right? Why can’t you follow simple directions?”
“I was hungry. The guards saw me.”
“The guards are paid to watch you inside the garage. Once you’re on the outside, you’re fair game,” he told her.
“They didn’t say that—they told me they’d watch me.”
“Did any of them rush to help you?”
No, they hadn’t. But still...”I didn’t need it. I took care of myself. I always have.”
Bishop’s hands closed into fists. He turned and banged one hard on the metal wall of the tube. “Stubborn, stubborn girl. I thought things would be different.”
“Why? Because you’re all loved here, the way you are in Defiance.”
“What’s the real problem, Luna. Lay it out on the table.” He turned to stare at her, his eyes glittering.
Bishop’s temper wasn’t something she’d ever wanted to tempt—not willingly anyway. But something inside her needed to push him to the limit. In the end, that would be the only way she’d go over. And whether she knew that consciously when she started this, it didn’t matter.
“You ruined everything, damn it,” she told him.
“How did I do that, baby? Because from where I stand, you were pretty fucked up before I ever set foot in Defiance.”
“And you’re not? You pretend to have it all together, but you’re as fucked up as I am.”
“I am completely fucked up, Luna. But I do have it together—that’s entirely possible.”
“That’s why you beat the shit out of people, right?”
“That’s my job here, remember?”
“Don’t even try to lie to me, Bishop. You can do it to yourself, to anyone else, but not to me. You love the fighting. It’s the only thing stopping you from going over the edge.”
“Not the only thing,” he ground out. “I do it because Mathias saved me. Because in my culture, that means I owe him my life and my loyalty. But that’s not the only reason I do things. It’s because I want to. I know the difference between blind stupidity and loyalty,” he told her. “I’d give my life for Mathias. For this year, I did, for him and for Defiance, which you’re a part of.”
“You’re just as bad as the rest of them. Your blind loyalty to a club like that, before Caspar became president, treated women like shit. Dealt out beatings to anyone who spoke out against it.”
He grabbed her, a strong grip that was oddly gentle and indestructible at the same time. “Don’t you ever compare me to anyone. For better or worse, Luna. I’m my own goddamned man. Always was. Always will be. If that’s not something you can deal with, then walk the fuck away.”
“I can’t,” she snapped. “Remember? I’m trapped here.”
He shot back, “Say the goddamned word, Luna, and you’re out of here. Back to Defiance, anywhere you want to go that you think will make you happy.”
She swallowed hard, pride wounded, knowing the man who held her fast was the only one who made her happy.
“Trouble admitting it, Luna? Trouble saying that you want to stay here with me. Because of me.” His voice, like warm honey, making her shiver. She was wet between her legs, her heart a throb between her legs and oh God, he put the pressure of the heel of his palm on her and rubbed up and down. She gasped, could do nothing but hold fast to this shoulders and he watched her, that small smile on his face.
“You can’t...” She started, stopped when he sucked her nipple through the cotton of her T-shirt. She closed her eyes and bit back the whimper. Because they weren’t alone, and she could feel the people passing by. Prob
ably half didn’t care, another quarter didn’t look, but she’d watched, so she knew others were watching this.
He pulled his mouth away. “Yeah, Luna, I can. I will. Unless you say no.”
He knew she couldn’t say no. Even when he wasn’t allowed to touch her, when she was the one in seeming control, she didn’t say no to him.
Now, she knew for sure she’d lost any semblance of control she thought she might have. He used his the heel of his hand between her legs, through her jeans, rubbing with an intense rhythm.
She groaned. Spread her thighs wider and rocked against his hand, wanting more—needing contact. But he didn’t try to move his hand inside her pants and her belly tightened with the impending orgasm. Trapped against him, trapped by him, she was going to come for him. She was going to let him know that she didn’t want to go anywhere without him.
She was going to break through.
“Now, Luna,” he commanded and before she could do anything, she came with a cry, bucking against him. And when she shattered, he held her tightly. She needed more though—a lot more, and she murmured that to him, told him something incoherent about how she never had to tell him anything, that he knew.
“I know one thing for sure—this isn’t over,” he told her roughly, his voice thick with arousal. “Not until I make you understand that you need to do what I say, and I’m going to show you what that feels like until you know it intimately.”
His words made her tremble, but she couldn’t deny it wasn’t from fear. Not even a little bit, especially not when he pretty much manhandled her, putting her over his shoulder.
“Put me down, Bishop,” she told him, tried to squirm away, but he totally ignored her.
* * *
Bishop was goddamned furious at her. She might not understand that there was trouble everywhere, even the motherfucking fantasyland that Keller’s seemed to be. She was thrilled to get into a fight and prove herself, to gain that bit of freedom and all he could think of was that he was going to have a heart attack every day for the next eight months.
He needed to protect her at all costs—and he would. Because he could not—would not—lose her. Tonight, he’d finally show her that, remind her that she came to him, and that there was a price to living with a dangerous man.
He let her down at the mouth of the ladder to the tube. She went down, cursing him the whole time. “Keep pushing, Luna.”
“I will,” she told him. She waited for him at the door, and once inside, he slammed it closed, locked it and pulled her against him, locking her between him and the wall.
“You could’ve been killed today.”
“And you could be killed every day.”
“No offense, Luna, but I’m a little better trained in this shit than you are. I know I’ve made it seem like Keller’s is insular and safe, but it’s not. There’s shit going on with the LoV—blowback for kicking them out of the compound. They’re not going down easily and you got yourself involved with LoV sympathizers today.”
“I didn’t know that.”
“Which is why you’ve got to assume everyone here has an ulterior motive. I’m on the LoV shit list. For their little hangers-on to get a piece of my woman? Do you see how badly that could’ve gone? You think they wouldn’t have taken down a piece of Defiance if they hadn’t seen Kammy?”
By the look in her eyes, he could see that she hadn’t thought that far.
Chapter Twenty-One
“There’s insidious danger, and then there’s immediate danger,” Bishop told her. “All of that’s here. All of that’s why you need to do whatever the fuck I say. And that doesn’t mean you’re weak or that you have to walk around scared. It means I want to protect you from this shit, make it so you don’t have to worry. It’s what I need to do, and you need to let me.”
“And what are you going to let me do?” Luna challenged.
“Wrap me around your goddamned finger,” Bishop growled, and that seemed to make him madder than anything else.
It also made her smile, which made him growl again. Before she could say anything more, he was on her, pushing her against the wall, holding her up by the hips, forcing her to wrap around him or fall. And she was so tired of falling...
But she knew he’d catch her. Every single time. Which was why she caught him, pulled him against her. Threaded her fingers through his hair and kissed him, moaning into his mouth.
He ripped her shirt open. Buttons scattered. He ripped her tank off like it was a piece of paper, exposed her breasts to him. When his fingers found her nipples, she surged against him. It was as if a jolt of electricity went straight from the hard peaks to between her legs.
He lifted her a little higher, brought his mouth down on her nipples and she moaned, watching him. So rough...so good...and somehow, still so safe.
He slowly lowered her, but only so he could peel her jeans off.
“Hurry, Bishop,” she murmured, and he picked her up again, put her onto the bed. Then he knelt at the edge and put her thighs over his shoulders and buried his face in her sex. She jumped. Cried out. Fisted the sheets as he licked her most sensitive areas, holding her open and exposed to him. Exposed to anyone who walked in, and although that hadn’t happened yet, that was somehow part of the thrill.
This was more than she’d ever thought she’d have, more than she’d ever thought she’d be able to feel with any man.
He was claiming her. She had no doubt he would’ve done this on her first night there, on their first night together if he hadn’t sensed her hesitance to do more than they’d done. The fact that he knew her past, that he wasn’t afraid of it, of her...that he didn’t think she was too damaged, that he showed her she wasn’t too damaged to enjoy this meant everything to her.
His tongue burrowed deep inside of her, his teeth grazed her clit and she was wantonly rolling her rips, pressing herself against his mouth, like she was afraid he’d stop.
But he wasn’t. Even as the pressure in her womb built to an almost unbearable level, he wasn’t pulling back. He was giving her exactly what she needed, and she held him there, until she came with a cry. Her orgasm felt like it went on forever and when she opened her eyes, the world was still hazy, and Bishop hovered over her.
“I’m going to take you, Luna. Make you mine. And you’re going to goddamned listen to me from now on, got it?”
“Still giving orders,” she murmured.
“Seems like you don’t mind taking them this way,” he shot back, and yes, no argument there.
“Don’t you dare stop now.”
“Wasn’t planning on it,” he told her, but his voice was much gentler than it had been earlier. She was so wet from her orgasm, from his mouth, and he slid partially inside of her before stopping. She gasped, because no, this was nothing like his fingers or his tongue. He was impossibly big and she was tight.
He leaned in and licked behind her ear. Suckled there, played with her nipples, until she pushed against him. Even though it hurt she knew it would get better. Had to. There were wars won and lost over this—it had to be the most amazing thing ever.
And there was a pinch of pain, but an equal one of pleasure. Bishop knew exactly how to handle her, how to make her fly and it didn’t take long before all the pain was gone.
All of it.
When he was fully seated in her, she stared into his eyes for a long moment. Brushed a hand over his cheek. This was nothing like what had happened to her in the old woodshed. That was dark and scary and this had pushed that memory completely out...she hoped forever.
She knew it was forever when he moved, flexing his hips to bring her an entirely new kind of pleasure that she was immediately addicted to him. Her feet locked around his back and her hips rose up to meet his thrusts.
* * *
Afterward, she lay, half on hi
s chest, tracing his tattoos with her finger. When she got to the girl’s name, hidden inside an elaborate scrollwork that encompassed his shoulder, he knew she was finally going to ask about Mia’s name.
When she did, hesitantly, he told her, “She’s a girl I knew four years ago.”
“Did you date her?”
“It wasn’t like that.”
“Well, she made an impact if you added her name to your body,” she said.
He saw a bit of jealousy seeping through and truth be told, he didn’t mind it much. “Right before we went into the military—and onto the sub—we stopped in this little town for the weekend. They were known for their parties, because most of the people who still lived there were part of an MC charter—the OA’s. It was a small charter, and they stuck together with the town.”
“She was an MC girl?”
“No, she wasn’t. She was older than I was, nineteen to my almost seventeen. She ran this herbal shop before the storms, and afterward, she was into natural healing, so the town depended on her, since the closest doctors were an hour away, on the military base. She was pretty and kind, and she was something to see when she was helping people. Like the way you are with your cars—you can tell when someone’s doing something they’re born to do.”
“You loved her?” she asked quietly, although it seemed to be less of a question on her end.
He looked at Luna. “I did, yeah.” Mathias knew about Mia—and the obvious impact she’d made on him, since he’d asked Mathias to tattoo him after two days of being with her. But that tattoo happened afterward...
He drew in a deep breath, because he hated talking about it. Mathias had witnessed it firsthand. “It was a whirlwind. I didn’t expect it. We spent the weekend together, and I told her I’d come back right after boot camp. And I told you what happened with the subs. When we were pulled off, we were put into barracks. First chance we saw, Mathias and I broke out to go see her. She was two towns over...and it was destroyed.”
Luna’s eyes widened in surprise. “What happened?”
Salvation Page 13
