Longing For Home

by Christine Lynxwiler

  Brandi considered excusing herself and calling Gram to come get her, but she decided that would make everyone even more uncomfortable than they already were.

  As they stood in line for a table, Jake kept the conversation going so smoothly that Brandi couldn’t help but be impressed. He had never been a country bumpkin, but he was pure class tonight. He drew each one out in turn. By the time they were ushered to their table—a round table for six rather than the booth Elizabeth had first requested—it was almost conceivable she had truly planned this gathering as a get-acquainted pizza party instead of a blind date. Until it came time to sit down.

  Brandi decided to hang back and take whatever seat remained vacant. Apparently so did everyone else. So they ended up doing the pizza parlor version of a Mexican hat dance until Elizabeth finally pushed Steve toward a chair and said, “Sit!” She plopped down beside him. For the first time since the whole awkward night began, a flash of uncertainty crossed Jake’s face.

  Brandi yanked the chair out next to Elizabeth and sat down. A moment later Jake pulled out the chair two seats down from her, and Denise slid in with a gracious thank-you. Then he sat between them.

  Brandi couldn’t imagine that the first round of a major-league baseball draft could have been any more difficult or required more finesse than this seating ritual.

  “So, Jake,” Elizabeth asked. “How’s your shoulder?”

  “It’s a little better. I have a reevaluation week after next with the team docs. But I’m pretty much resigned to the fact that I’ll be out the rest of this season.”

  “Will they let you do any pitching warm-ups at all?” Steve asked.

  Jake shook his head. “Nope. I’m hoping they will after this check-up, but for now just cardio training.”

  Brandi stared at them. She’d been living in the same house with Jake for almost four weeks, and she’d learned more about his life in the past two minutes than she had in all that time. She needed to take a serious look at her people skills.

  “You travel a lot, don’t you?” Denise asked, looking up at Jake, eyes shining. What Brandi had mistaken for a half-whisper earlier was really a sultry alto voice.

  “Yes.” Even though his face was turned partly away from her, Brandi could see him responding to Denise’s warm smile with one of his own. “I travel with the team during the season, and then I travel regularly, speaking, during off-season.”

  “Your program to discourage drug abuse among teenagers, right?” Denise touched Jake’s arm. “I think that’s fascinating.”

  For the next ten minutes all eyes were on Denise, who kept up a running stream of questions for Jake. She only stopped when the harried waitress finally came by to get their drink order. Brandi had a sinking feeling it was going to be a long night.

  What had this girl done? Read a short biography of Jake McFadden in preparation for this evening?

  “How did you get involved in your teen drug and alcohol prevention program?” Denise asked, as soon as the waitress left.

  Jake hesitated a minute. “When I was in college, one of my buddies on the team was injured in an alcohol-related accident.” He stopped as if considering what else to say.

  “So, Brandi,” Steve broke in. “Your parents said you’re in computer programming.”

  “That’s right.” Was it her imagination, or had her voice grown rusty from non-use? Maybe she was subconsciously mimicking Denise’s tone. The come-hither voice sure seemed to hold Jake’s attention.

  Brandi cringed at the catty thought. This was an uncomfortable situation for everyone, and it wasn’t as if she and Jake were really on a date. She’d been listening to Valerie too much.

  “And you have a software company?”

  “Yes, we do.” He looked fondly at Elizabeth. “Even though the software Elizabeth uses most is a word-processing program, we’re partners in the business.”

  “I know.” Brandi touched Elizabeth’s arm. “Jake told me you were a best-selling author. I can’t wait to read your books.”

  “They’re absolutely delightful,” Denise piped in. “Have you read them, Jake?”

  “Yes, I have. Elizabeth has a real way with words.” Jake tore his attention from Denise and smiled across Brandi at Elizabeth. Brandi was just glad to see his head could still swivel both ways.

  “And so do you.” Denise placed her hand on Jake’s arm, bringing his gaze back to her. “I’ve read your journal on your Web site. You have such a heart for teens.”

  Brandi felt her blood pressure rise. The librarian was like a perpetual wind-up doll.

  “Oh, you’ve read my journal?” Jake asked. “My Webmaster insisted I add that. I told him no one would read it.” He chuckled. “I’ll have to call him and let him know I was wrong.”

  “You sure will. I have an e-mail reminder sent to my inbox every time there’s an update,” Denise said.

  Can anyone say stalker? Brandi thought irritably then shamed herself again. She knew there was no future for her and Jake, so why was she letting Denise’s obvious attraction to him bother her? Especially since Jake seemed to be eating it up.

  The waitress appeared with their drinks and took their pizza order. Denise squealed with delight when she and Jake ordered the same thing. Brandi couldn’t help but wonder if his favorite pizza had been in his Web site journal. Resisting the urge to ditto their orders just to take the wind out of Denise’s sails, she stuck by her veggie pizza preference.

  “Jake, my man!”

  Brandi groaned. That voice hadn’t changed much in eight years. She looked up at Les as he pumped Jake’s hand. He was still muscular and fit. He’d cut his blond curls into a buzz cut that gave him a more tough-guy look than he’d sported in high school.

  Elizabeth’s smile grew wider. “Les, why don’t you eat with us? We ordered plenty.”

  “Ah. . . .” Les ducked his head, and Brandi thought the big guy might be blushing, but with his naturally rosy cheeks she couldn’t be sure. “I just came in to order a pizza to take home. I’m not really dressed for it—” He motioned down at his uniform with its monogrammed name patch.

  “C’mon, Les—stay. Girls love a guy in a uniform,” Jake teased.

  “You should know, McFadden,” Les shot back. “That’s the reason you play ball, isn’t it?”

  “Yep. That’s the only way I can get them to notice me.” Jake’s good-natured grin amazed Brandi. His career hung by a thread, and getting it back obviously meant everything to him. How could he joke about it?

  Les slid into the chair between Denise and Steve.

  “Hi, Brandi, good to see you again,” Les smiled at her across the table.

  “Les, how are you doing?” Brandi asked.

  “Pretty good.” He looked at the librarian. “Hi, Denise. You look nice tonight.”

  “Hi, Les. Thanks.” Denise’s smile seemed more real than anything about her since they’d sat down. “We missed you Wednesday night.”

  This time Les definitely blushed. “I had a late tow call and couldn’t make it.”

  Denise looked back at the rest of them. “When I first joined the singles’ class at our church, Les was the only one who spoke to me. I think the others were a little intimidated by me.”

  Brandi quickly turned a snort into a cough.

  The pizza arrived, and either because her mouth was full or because of Les’s arrival, Denise finally wound down. By the time they had finished eating, Brandi had decided the woman wasn’t as bad as she’d thought. With Les, the librarian seemed like a real person instead of an obsessed fan. Brandi’s feelings were reinforced when the muscular blond offered to take Denise home and she accepted.

  After they left, Elizabeth sighed. “That went well.”

  They all stared at her then simultaneously burst out laughing.

  “What?” Elizabeth asked. “I prayed it would work out, and it did.”

  “You’ve still got it, Elizabeth. I don’t know what it is exactly, but you’ve still got it,” Brandi said, sq
ueezing her friend’s hand.

  “Denise isn’t always so—talkative. I think she was probably nervous,” Elizabeth said. “In case you couldn’t tell, she’s a big baseball fan.”

  Brandi nodded, feeling like an idiot for reacting the way a jealous girlfriend would.

  “I’m so glad you came with Jake tonight. I’m just sorry I had other”—Elizabeth cleared her throat—“plans.”

  “Speaking of Denise,” Jake said, drawing his brows together, “did I miss the part where you asked me if I wanted a blind date?”

  Elizabeth put her hand to her mouth and giggled.

  Steve shook his head, but love for his irrepressible wife gleamed in his eyes. “I warned her. But she wouldn’t listen. Some nonsense about wanting everyone to be as happy as we are.” He took Elizabeth’s hand across the table and twined his fingers with hers.

  Brandi thought she saw a flash of pain across Jake’s face.

  “Besides, we didn’t know you were already going to have a date,” Elizabeth added.

  “It’s not a date,” Brandi said.

  At the same moment Jake said, “We’re just friends.”

  Elizabeth put up her hands. “Okay, okay. I get the picture.”

  But from the twinkle in the redhead’s eye Brandi sincerely doubted she did.

  ❧

  As they retraced their route back to the B&B, Jake glanced at Brandi. She’d been quiet ever since they’d said good-bye to Elizabeth and Steve outside the pizza parlor. “You okay?”

  “Yeah, I’m fine.” She twisted her mouth thoughtfully.

  “Denise had a lot to say, didn’t she?” In spite of the awkwardness of the evening Brandi had acted like the consummate lady. Not very many women would have handled the situation with such aplomb.

  “Yes. Sometimes I forget you’re a celebrity and people act differently around you from how they normally would.”

  Jake pulled the truck into the B&B parking lot and grinned at her. “So I’m just a regular joe to you, huh?”

  “Pretty much.” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

  “That’s too bad. You’re kind of special to me.” He held his breath. That sentence came with a money-back guarantee to get her guard up.

  A smile flitted across her face in the moonlight. “Jake—”

  “I know. We aren’t going there.”

  “You got it.”

  “Well, the night didn’t turn out the way I thought it would.” He knew changing the subject was his only hope of keeping her with him awhile longer. “I’m sorry for not calling Elizabeth ahead of time as you suggested.” He grinned. “On the other hand, it sort of served her right to have to deal with the awkward situation she created, considering she set that up without asking me.”

  “What would you have said if she’d asked?” Brandi’s casual question hung in the air.

  “Why do you want to know?” Jake shot back.

  Brandi shrugged and opened the truck door. “Just making conversation.” She climbed out and slammed the door behind her.

  Yeah, right. Miss California cared a little more about his social life than she was willing to admit. For some reason that realization warmed the loneliest corners of his heart.

  He jumped out and jogged a few feet to catch up with her. As they walked up to the porch he wondered if she could hear his heart beating. Even though he knew it was too soon—who was he kidding? Even though he knew it should never happen, all he could think about was kissing Brandi good night.

  He glanced over at her, blond hair streaming down her back like a silver curtain woven with moonbeams. When they stepped up to the door, he paused. She stopped and looked up at him. “I had a great time tonight, Jake. Thanks for asking me.”

  “Thanks for going. I had fun, too.”

  He leaned toward her, unable to read the expression in her sparkling eyes.

  The front door opened. Valerie stood there with her hands on her hips. “I thought y’all were never coming home. Melissa’s been in the bathroom hurling for half an hour.”

  Jake followed Brandi into the house. He tried to tell himself the interruption was a good thing, but his heart refused to believe it.

  Twelve

  Brandi tossed the empty spray can of disinfectant into the laundry-room trash and pushed her hair back from her forehead. Dare she hope the ordeal was over? Melissa, Michael, and Valerie had each been sick with a forty-eight-hour virus, staggered out over the past four days. Brandi had isolated them all in Michael’s large room on the first floor to keep them away from the paying guests.

  The last thing they needed was word-of-mouth advertising for the sickest little B&B west of the Mississippi. Gram and Jake had escaped unscathed, and so far Brandi had, too, which was amazing considering she’d slept on a cot in the sickroom for four nights. Even though she was dog-tired, her stomach didn’t hurt, and for that she was extremely thankful.

  One good thing about the virus epidemic was that it kept her mind off the “almost kiss.” For the most part. She’d still managed to relive the minute several times. Each time she tried to guess what she would have done if Valerie hadn’t opened the door.

  Her reaction usually depended on whether she had her eyes closed or open when she recreated the moment. In broad daylight she always pulled away and made some witty remark. But when her eyes were closed, she leaned toward him and surrendered to the sweetness of his kiss.

  “What are you staring at?”

  Brandi jumped. She was standing in the middle of the laundry room clutching a bag of dirty clothes.

  Valerie stood in the doorway, eyebrow raised. “Talk about zoned out! You’ve missed way too much sleep.”

  “You didn’t complain when I was holding your head night before last.” Brandi stuffed the sheets in the washer and poured in the detergent. The last four days and nights had been a dizzying spin of holding heads and doling out soda and crackers. Gram had wanted to help, but Brandi knew bending over would be hard on her back.

  Valerie looked up from where she was sorting clothes. “You did good, sis. It was almost like having Mom home.”

  Brandi basked in her sister’s praise. She’d worried the kids would think her a poor substitute. “I’m glad I was here.”

  “Yeah, me, too.” Her sister kept sorting the laundry into piles, but she cleared her throat. “Brandi?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Did you ever have friends who completely changed?”

  Brandi considered her question. “What do you mean?”

  “Oh, you know.”

  No, I have no idea, but I’m trying. She sent up a silent prayer for help. If I could still speak teenager-ese, maybe I could decipher this.

  “How did they change?” Maybe her casual tone would work.

  “Well, they’ve always been just like me. We like boys, and we like to have fun, but we’re different from a lot of the girls. Only this year they’re not.” Valerie glanced at Brandi and then back to the pile of whites. “You know?”

  Think. Like boys, like fun. Different from a lot of girls; only this year, not. What did that mean?

  Brandi felt like a rookie lion tamer. How exactly do you not let them smell your fear?

  “So you’re saying. . .” Maybe letting her voice drift off would make Valerie want to fill in the implied blanks.

  “Yeah, that now they’re just like everyone else, and they want me to be, too.”

  “Angie and Brit?”

  “Well, duh. Yeah.”

  Okay, so far, so good.

  “In other words they want to go to parties in Rainey’s clearing and things like that.” Brandi kept the casual tone in her voice.

  Valerie nodded. “And if I don’t, they won’t be my friends anymore. And neither will anyone else.”

  “That’s a rough choice, isn’t it?” Brandi swallowed hard. She was way over her head here.

  “That’s what I’m saying.” Valerie had dropped all pretense of working. “So what would you do?”

&
nbsp; “Val, there’s not an easy answer to that.”

  “No kidding. I made all A’s last year. I figured if there was one, I’d know it by now.”

  Brandi had a hard time imagining her sharp-tongued sister giving in to peer pressure, but then she remembered another sharp-tongued senior whose life had been made miserable by a group of girls.

  Anger coursed through her hard and fast at the thought of Valerie dealing with that. She suddenly related more to the mama lion than the lion tamer. “Thanksgiving isn’t too far away. The school year is almost half over. I know this is hard for you to imagine now, but you’ll be graduating right away. You know what you believe. It’s not worth compromising that to make everyone like you, is it?”

  “No.”

  “Is there anybody else you can be friends with until then?”

  “Well, there’s Jeannie. She’s kind of cool, and we get along—but she’s always got her nose stuck in a book.” Valerie looked uncertain.

  “Hey, I had a friend exactly like that in high school. Elizabeth Battlestone. Her name’s Elizabeth Campbell now, and she’s a best-selling author.”

  “Elizabeth Campbell was your friend?” Valerie’s eyes widened. “The Elizabeth Campbell?”

  Brandi nodded.

  “You are so lucky! She came to school and spoke in assembly. I’ve read all her books. Wow!” Valerie shook her head. “You think Jeannie might end up like that?”

  “You never know.”

  “It’s worth a shot, huh?” Valerie asked.

  Before Brandi could go into not making friends based on ulterior motives, Valerie laughed.

  The dinner bell rang, and Valerie dropped the clothes in her hand. “Do you think we’re germ-free enough to eat with everyone else now?”

  Brandi nodded. “Let’s go. Jake’s the only guest here right now, anyway.”

  “Oh, well, who cares if we make him sick, right?” Valerie teased.

  “I haven’t seen him in four days. I’m pretty sure he cares,” Brandi said. Either that or he’s staying away from me on general principle after the other night. Which would be smart.

  They washed their hands and walked into the dining room together. Melissa and Michael were sitting at the table on either side of Gram. Both kids got up and hugged Brandi even though they’d seen her that morning. Through their illness and forced isolation together, the Delaney siblings had turned a corner in their relationship with their oldest sister. In spite of her exhaustion Brandi couldn’t help but be happy at the thought.