Finding Home

by Ali Spooner

  Nat took the rope from her pack and walked to where the buck laid dead. She laid her hand on his neck and she could feel the warmth as it left his body in the cool morning. “Thank you for your sacrifice,” she whispered to the animal, and then she tied the rope around his back hooves. Nat carried the animal to the nearest tree and using the rope hoisted his body upward until his body was off the ground entirely.

  Nat despised the next part of the ritual, but took the knife from her belt and slowly drew a line across the buck’s stretched throat to bleed him and then made the deep incision down his belly to disembowel the beast and prepare his carcass for transport. This unpleasant task done, Nat walked to the river bank to wash her knife and hands before making her way back to the cabin where she would bring Quincy back to carry the buck home for her.

  She gathered her goods and made her way back to the cabin. She left her pack on the porch and peeked inside the door to find Gyp soundly asleep in the wood bin and she quietly closed the door. Removing the tether from Quincy’s back legs, Nat led the mule back to the river’s edge to retrieve the buck. Quincy allowed Nat to strap the buck across his back and then they walked back to the cabin.

  Nat strung the buck up into a tree once again when they reached the cabin and she began the task of skinning the buck with her sharp knife. She carefully placed the hide on the tanning wall on the end of the cabin and then began to carve the buck. She cut a large roast from the hind quarter and carried it into the cabin where she skewered it onto the spit and placed it over the flames for roasting.

  Gyp watched her from the wood bin with sleepy eyes and then wagged her whole body when Nat reached down to pick her up and carry her outside. Gyp trotted along beside Nat and sat watching her as Nat carved the rest of the meat and carried it into a small smoke house to prepare for curing. Gyp watched her intently as Nat coated the meat with salt, rubbing it deeply into the tender meat before hanging it from the rafters by string and lighting the fire in the smoke house. The process would take days so Nat scoured the woods surrounding the cabin for firewood to keep the fire stoked.

  As the afternoon sun faded, Nat finished her chores and cleaned up at the river’s edge before she walked back into the cabin. She pulled the jar of honey from her pack and placed it on the table. The roast in the fire smelled heavenly as Nat rolled out fresh biscuits and placed them on the hearth. She checked the fire in the smokehouse and was playing outside with Gyp when she heard her father ride up.

  “That is the most heavenly smell” Nathan said as he dismounted and walked toward Nat.

  “I was lucky this morning and got a nice buck,” Nat said as she walked her dad around to the tanning wall and then led him into the smoke house.

  Nathan was very impressed with his daughter’s success. “I would say you were very fortunate,” Nathan said as he placed his arm around Nat.

  “I have a roast cooking and there is plenty of back strap to make jerky and yes before you asked I saved the heart and liver too,” Nat replied.

  Nat knew that Nathan enjoyed making stew from the deer’s heart and if they could find some wild onions or potatoes he would fry the liver as a special treat. Nathan taught Nat well how to use every part of an animal’s body so nothing would go to waste.

  Nat helped her father care for his horse and together they walked into the cabin, Gyp bouncing merrily along behind them.

  “I swear she has grown since this morning,” Nathan said as he scooped Gyp up in his rough hands.

  “She slept most of the morning so she’s been full of herself this afternoon, Nat said as Nathan scratched behind the pup’s ears.

  They walked into the house together and Nat started setting the table while Nathan checked the roast on the spit. “This looks fantastic,” Nathan said as he took his knife and sliced off several pieces of the fragrant roasted meat and carried them to the table.

  Nathan sat down at the table and spied the jar of honey sitting next to the biscuits. “My, my you did have a good days hunt,” he said as he lifted the jar holding the golden honey, spinning the lid off and pouring a small amount onto his plate.

  “I thought we could use a treat,” Nat said, her glowing smile lighting up the room.

  “Indeed, you have prepared us a feast,” Nathan said as he returned Nat’s warm smile.

  During their meal they discussed plans for spending a couple of weeks in the cabin before moving on toward Seattle to do their trading and settle down for the winter. Both Nathan and his daughter were eager to make the trip and return to civilization if even for a brief respite.

  Later that evening, Nat dreamed of soaking in a hot bath and buying a new pair of dungarees and work shirt which would replace her buckskins which could use a good airing out.

  ****

  Nat sat back against the wall of the cave and closed her eyes. Her hand instinctively went to her neck where she located a leather thong and traced it down her neck until she touched the large bear claw nestled under her shirt.

  ****

  The days passed quickly at the cabin and two days before they would pack and hit the trail, her Father went out ahead of her to check traps. Nat saddled Hardy an hour later and followed her father’s trail into the woods. Today’s catch would be the last and they would pack and head out at first light for the long ride into Seattle.

  Hardy’s nostrils flared as they rode deeper into the woods and his muscles twitched with every sound. Hardy could smell something in the forest that had his every nerve on edge and his anxiety was slowly transferring to Nat. She patted his neck in an effort to calm him but even her reassuring words could not prevent the lather of sweat breaking out across his body.

  A rifle shot rang out in the woods from the direction her father would be trapping and suddenly the relatively calm forest broke out in a riot of sounds. Nat drove her heels into Hardy’s flanks spurring him to a full gallop as she recognized the bellow of a large bear and heard her father shouting at the beast. Nat reached a clearing and could only watch as Nathan got off another rifle shot, striking the bear squarely in the chest as he charged, but not slowing his advance. Nathan fumbled to reload as the bear, a full grown grizzly reared onto his hind legs only three feet away from him.

  Nat watched in horror as the bear advanced on her father, sharp claws striking out at him while rabid foam flew through the air as the beast roared his anger which echoed throughout the forest. She raised her rifle to take aim as the bear raked a large paw across Nathan’s face and neck slicing through his skin like a knife through warm butter. Nat squeezed the trigger and her shot hit the bear behind its left ear driving the bullet deep into his brain, but the bear did not fall. She ejected the shell and reloaded preparing for another shot as she saw Nathan fall to the ground. Her next shot struck the bear straight in the heart and the bear finally faltered and fell beside Nathan.

  Hardy slid to a stop ten feet away and Nat jumped off his back still carefully eyeing the bear as she rushed to her father’s side. The bear twitched and Nat shot him once again then kneeled down next to her father.

  Blood gushed from her father’s face and neck, his jugular severed and the realization struck Nat a crushing blow that there was nothing she could do to prevent her father’s death. Nat sat beside her father on the blood soaked ground and held his hand while she watched his life slip away from his body. “I love you Father,” Nat said then Nathan closed his pain filled eyes and passed into the next world.

  Nat sat for hours with her father’s head in her lap in the death filled meadow, until Hardy’s soft lips brushed her neck bringing her out of her stupor. She managed to find her father’s horse and struggled until she managed to drape his lifeless body across his saddle and then mounted Hardy for the ride back to the cabin.

  She carried Nathan’s body onto the cabin porch and bathed the drying blood from his body. She searched through their packs until she found a shovel and began preparing a grave for her beloved father. Shock overcame her body and she moved mechanically as
she carried Nathan and placed him in the ground, slowly covering his body with the freshly dug earth.

  Nat made several trips down to the river’s edge to collect rocks to prepare a mound over her father’s grave and as the sun slowly sank into the horizon she placed the last rock upon her father’s grave. She sat beside the grave and Gyp who had traced her every step crawled up into her lap to provide whatever comfort she could to her mourning master. The chill of the oncoming night forced Nat into the cabin and she sat before the fireplace totally alone for the first time in her life.

  Sometime during the night Nat curled up in a ball in front of the hearth and she awoke the next morning with Gyp cuddled up in her arms. She walked outside to where she had buried her father to confirm that she was indeed awake and not living some horrible dream. Reality struck her like a brick as she looked down on the mound of stones that covered the last of her family. Tears slid down her cheek as she wondered what would become of her now. Nathan had prepared her well for trapping and trading, but she never dreamed she would be all alone at such a young age.

  Nat saddled Hardy and with Gyp trotting beside her rode to the clearing where the bear lay motionless. Hardy shied away from the smell of fresh blood and remained a distance from the prostate bear refusing to approach further.

  She dismounted and began the tedious work of skinning the large bear, removing the large claws and tucking them away in a leather pouch. Grizzly claws were prized trading items as well as the bears pelt, but Nat was certain she would never part with the hide of the animal that killed her father. Nat hated to waste any animal but she would be damned if she would taste the flesh of this beast and once she finished her work she set the carcass ablaze, purifying the ground where her father had died.

  Hardy shied away from the bears pelt when Nat approached so she rode back to the cabin to retrieve Quincy and safely harnessed the pelt to his back. Once they returned to the cabin, Nat removed the deer hide that had finished drying and replaced it with the bear’s hide. Nat cut a long strip of the hide and used it to bind the two pieces of wood together that she had fashioned as a cross to mark her father’s grave. She had carved her father’s name into the crosspiece with the year of his death and used a large stone to drive it into the ground at the head of his grave.

  Nat spent the next two days packing her supplies and preparing for the journey to Seattle, carefully storing the dried meat and other food supplies for the weeks of travel waiting ahead. She made one more trip to the honey tree to salvage one final jar of honey for her trip and that evening used the last of her flour to make a final batch of biscuits.

  Sitting in front of the fire, Nat chose one of the bear claws and using a tiny awl bored a hole through the claw. Using a thin strip of the deer hide, she fashioned a necklace with the bear claw and slipped it over her head to rest just above her heart. In the days and years to come, Nat would caress the bear claw when thinking of her father and take comfort in this token of his life.

  The next morning, Nat packed the animals and stood before her father’s grave and with a final goodbye she turned to take the first step to her future.

  She rode for three days until she found the large cave she planned to rest in before the final leg into Seattle. They had made the journey through the final mountain pass just as the first snow began to fall and Nat was relieved to once again reach flat ground. After a week’s rest, Nat would ride the final two days into Seattle where she would have to make decisions on what path her life would lead. Nat knew she was close to her destination when she encountered the dreary rains that plagued the area, sometimes for days on end.

  The final week passed quickly and soon Nat was facing the final night in the protection of the cave. Nat slept curled around Gyp that night and the following morning she began arranging her packs for the final leg of her journey. Unsure of what she would do once she traded out her pelts, Nat was sure of only one thing. She would stick to the plan that she and her father had made to rent a small cabin to spend the winter months restocking and planning for their next journey.

  Nat and her companions spent one last cold and damp night in the woods and by noon the next day she crested one final hill which opened up to the bustling town of Seattle. Nat sat for a moment and watched the bustling of the crowded streets and with a final look over her shoulder back into the forest, she urged Hardy to move forward.

  PART TWO

  Her first stop was made to the furriers to begin negotiations on her pelts. Smithy, the owner had always dealt fairly with Nat and her father, knowing they would only bring him the highest quality pelts and he rewarded them handsomely for their loyalty. Smithy smiled warmly at Nat, a smile that faded quickly when he realized she was alone.

  “Where is Nathan,” he calmly asked, placing an arm around Nat?

  “He’s gone Smithy,” Nat said, the threat of tears choking her voice. “He was checking traps and was mauled by a grizzly a few weeks back.”

  “I am so sorry to hear that,” Smithy said. “Nathan was a great man,” he added.

  “Yes he was,” Nat replied in agreement.

  “What will you do now?” Smithy asked.

  “I don’t know for sure yet Smithy. After trading I plan on getting a hot meal and bath and then hopefully rent out the old Johnson cabin for the winter before deciding what to do,” Nat said in a weary voice.

  “Well why don’t we get you unloaded and you can go get some food while I survey your pelts,” Smithy suggested as he walked outside with Nat.

  Smithy noticed the bear pelt on the back of her father’s horse and ran his hand through the course fur. “Is this the one that killed your dad?” he asked.

  “Yes it is,” Nat answered. “A big son of a bitch he was too.”

  “Are you planning on trading the pelt?” Smithy asked

  “No Smithy, that one’s a keeper,” she said.

  “Well let me know if you ever change your mind, a pelt that size would carry a large price on the market.”

  “You can see what you can get for these,” Nat said as she took the leather pouch which held the bear claws and tossed them to Smithy.

  Smithy opened the pouch and looked inside. “A small fortune I would expect,” Smithy said. “Some of these new greenhorns pay dearly for grizzly items and I am sure these will be a prize. Give me a day or two to get the best price for you,” he added with a grin.

  “I’ll check into the Stillwater and drop in to see you in the morning,” Nat said as she led the two horses and mule over to the livery.

  “See you in the morning then,” Smithy called out to her.

  Nat gave instructions for her animals to be cared for and then with Gyp on her heels she headed to the Stillwater to get a room. The clerks smile turned to a scowl as he eyed Gyp, but the look on Nat’s face told him she was a force to be reckoned with and he handed her the room key without comment.

  Nat carried her packs up the stairs to her room and then left the room with Gyp to find a nice hot meal. She stopped at the desk to tell the clerk to order up a hot bath for her in her room and then walked into the dining room. She sat at a small table and Gyp sat at her feet.

  A young woman approached her table to take her order. Nat took off her hat and her dark hair fell to her shoulders bringing a smile to the woman’s face.

  “What can I get for you?” she asked.

  “The biggest steak you can find well done with the works,” Nat answered. “A smaller steak well done for my companion too please,” she requested. “You can hold her beans,” Nat teased, “they give her gas,” she added with a chuckle.

  The waitress rewarded her with a brilliant smile before heading to the kitchen to place Nat’s order. Nat looked around the dining room at the town folk that had come in for an early dinner and a few stray fellow trappers who like her were still rugged from the trail. A hot bath would do wonders for Nat and she looked forward to it as much as she did a hot meal.

  The waitress returned with a steaming plate of fres
h rolls and butter. “You look hungry, so I brought these out for you,” she said as she sat the plate on the table.