Without You: Book 1 of the Changing Hearts Series

by Yesenia Vargas

  “No,” she said glancing at her door and lowering her voice. “It’s just…I have to tell you something.”

  Now she was rushing and talking too fast.

  “I was going to tell you when I saw you today, but I swear I forgot. Um.” She sighed.

  “What’s going on? Is everything okay?”

  “Yeah. I just—I found out the other day I got a scholarship.”

  “Another one? That’s awesome,” he said. His sincerity made it that much harder to keep explaining.

  “This one’s kind of different. It changes things,” she said. She looked blankly out the window. “It’s forty thousand dollars.”

  “What? Are you serious?” He laughed a little

  “Yeah. Ten thousand each year for four years.” She couldn’t decide if she should wait for him to do the math or just say it out loud.

  She decided to wait a little bit longer. Just when she was about to explain what that meant, he spoke up.

  “You can go to UGA,” he said quietly.

  “I—” she tried to say.

  “I’m happy for you. Really,” he said. The sincerity was still there, but not there was something else as well. Sadness.

  “I’m sorry,” she said. “I should have told you in person, but I didn’t want you to think I was hiding this from you.”

  “No, it’s okay,” he said. “Thanks. For telling me.” He sighed. “I mean, we kept saying that if it’s meant to happen, it would happen, you know? It happened. This is where you’re meant to be. I’m not going to stop you. I don’t want to. I—I can’t wait for you to go because I know this is your dream.”

  Tears threatened to escape from her eyes, and Ariana was kind of glad she was in her room instead of with him because she knew there’d be no way she could stop from crying if she was looking at him right now.

  “We’re not giving up, right?” she asked, trying to make her voice stay even.

  “Right,” he said. “I—I will always be here for you. If we’re meant to be, then it’ll happen. We’ll get through it.”

  There was silence, and she focused on her breathing for a little bit.

  Lucas spoke up again. “Are you excited? How did you find out? What did your parents say?”

  “I got an email. Remember, it was that huge packet I had to fill out that the counselor gave me? She recommended me for it, and it paid off. My parents couldn’t believe it either. They’re glad they’re not gonna go broke sending me to college.”

  “Yeah,” he said. The smile seemed to be back on his face.

  “What about you? Have you found out about your financial aid yet?”

  “I should find out pretty soon, probably by the time we graduate in a few more weeks.”

  “Oh my gosh.”

  “What?”

  “Graduation,” she said, staring at the ceiling. “It’s almost freakin’ here.”

  ###

  Ariana and Jimmy got out of the car and headed inside. It was Thursday afternoon, which meant it was pretty much Friday.

  Ariana yawned as she opened the front door and carried her bag to her room. Maybe she’d take a nap.

  Both of her parents were in the kitchen. “Ya llegamos,” she said with hardly a glance. She was brain fried.

  It had been a busy week. She had stayed up really late finishing up a five-page paper for English and studying for her finals at the end of next week. Plus, one last project for DECA. After that, freedom. A few days after that, Jimmy would be out of school too, and they’d finally have summer.

  “Jimmy!” she heard her mom yell from the kitchen.

  She had been about to go ahead and lie down, but her stomach growled for a snack. Snack, then a nap.

  As she headed out of her room, Jimmy was right ahead of her.

  “What?” he said, padding into the living room in just his socks. He was already in gym shorts. That boy lived in gym shorts.

  “Take a seat,” his mom said. She was standing next to the couch where their dad was sitting. The TV had been turned off. Ariana walked past them and into the kitchen. She went straight to the cupboard where the bread was and popped some in the toaster.

  “When were you going to tell us?” she heard her mom say. Her hand froze midway to the button for the toaster. She slowly turned around and padded over until she was just around the corner from the living room.

  “Tell you what?” Jimmy asked. The stammer in his voice betrayed him.

  “Are you really going to make us say it?” her mom asked.

  She heard Jimmy sigh. “Mayra.” Another pause. “How long have you known?”

  “A little while. How long have you two been novios?”

  “Who told you?” Jimmy asked.

  Ariana peeked her head around the corner. Jimmy glanced at her, and she quickly pointed at her chest and shook her head quietly but violently. Jimmy looked back at his mom.

  “I know you knew too, Ariana,” her mom said loudly.

  Crap, she thought. She walked into the living room.

  “What do you have to say, Jimmy?” her dad asked. He was seated on the couch while their mom stood with her arms crossed.

  Jimmy shrugged.

  “Why didn’t you just say something to us? We’re your parents,” her mom said, looking at her dad and back to them. “We’re supposed to know what’s going on in your lives.”

  “I was going to tell you—“

  “When?”

  “I don’t know.”

  Her mom glared and pursed her lips.

  “Soon. I really was. Ariana kept telling me to, but M—I wanted to wait.” Now his arms were folded across his chest, and he kept looking around.

  “Wait for what?” Her mom didn’t lose a beat.

  “Until Mayra was comfortable with everyone knowing.”

  Their mom guffawed. “I don’t even know where to start. We’re not everyone. We’re your parents.”

  Her dad spoke up. “And if Mayra didn’t want everyone to know, then you should have waited to become her boyfriend. All of this sneaking around does nobody any good.”

  “I know,” Jimmy said. “I’m sorry.”

  “You’re grounded for two weeks. No going out. No video games. Make sure you put the console in my room.”

  “What? Why?”

  Ariana didn’t know what to say. The same thing had happened to her last year. At least Jimmy was taking it better than she had.

  “You know why. You guys go out making us think you two are friends when who knows what all of you are up to.” She looked at Ariana who immediately looked away.

  “We were sixteen and seventeen once,” her dad continued. “We know the kinds of things that happen.”

  Jimmy walked down the hall into his room, probably to unplug his video game console. At least he got to keep his phone.

  Ariana decided to head into the kitchen to finish making her snack. She was not sleepy anymore. She wondered what was going on at Mayra’s house. Because if her parents knew, Mayra’s mom had to know.

  ###

  Ariana called Mayra after she scarfed down her snack, but she wasn’t picking up.

  A few seconds later, she got a text.

  Cnt talk. Talking to mom on d fone. Call u later :/

  Sounded like her mom wasn’t finished. She was still curious about how all of their parents had found out about Jimmy and Mayra, though.

  She got up and went to her desk to work on a project in the meantime.

  Ten minutes later, her phone began to buzz. It was Mayra calling. “Hey,” she said.

  Ariana had definitely heard Mayra happier. “What happened?” Ariana asked. “How’d our parents find out?”

  “Um, do you really want to know?”

  “Um, yeah, I want to know.” She saved her project and closed her computer, looking out the window in the direction of Mayra’s house.

  “Well, my mom kind of found Jimmy in my room last night, like kinda late. We weren’t doing anything except, you know, kissing, but
she came home early from work for once in her life, and she absolutely freaked when she saw us.”

  Ariana’s mouth fell open. “What?” She glanced at her door. It was closed, but that had been kind of loud. She had no idea Jimmy had snuck over. She guessed it probably wasn’t the first time.

  “Yeah, she told Jimmy to go home. Then she got all quiet, and then it was like a volcano exploded. And it just happened again. She told me she told your parents what happened, that they needed to know. So how bad did Jimmy get it?”

  “Two weeks.” Ariana still couldn’t believe what she had heard.

  “I got a month. I’m guessing my mom didn’t tell her the whole story. But she said if we pulled something like that again, she would.”

  “You can’t be serious.”

  “Believe me,” Mayra said. “I wish this wasn’t even happening. Just when I think things are going good, everything explodes in my face.”

  Ariana wanted to say how Mayra and Jimmy shouldn’t have kept their relationship a secret in the first place, but she decided she wasn’t the best person to be offering advice on that matter.

  She had made the same mistake just last year.

  ###

  Ariana rolled her eyes all during her English class. Wendy was in that class too, but she had left her relatively alone all semester after their incident last semester. The teacher had changed the seating and put them in opposite sides of the room.

  She just got the usual dirty looks. But today she seemed to be in a really good mood, which meant Ariana was going to be in a bad one.

  She wondered what exactly Lucas had seen in her besides the big boobs. That had to be it. Just the boobs. She rolled her eyes again and tried not to gag. She focused on the reading they were supposed to be doing instead.

  “Okay. Let’s get into small groups and discuss,” the teacher said. Everyone started shifting their desks to get with their buddies, but the teacher spoke up again. “You know what? Let’s switch it up. We’ve been in the same, stagnant groups all semester. Let’s count off to five starting on this side of the room.” Everyone groaned as he pointed to the side where Wendy was. They moved their desks back.

  “One.”

  “Two.”

  The numbers reached Wendy. “Three,” Wendy said with another eye roll. They kept going until it was Ariana’s turn at the other side.

  “Damn,” she whispered under breath as the counting approached her. “Three,” she said during her turn.

  “Okay. Let’s move,” the teacher said, explaining where each group should meet and walked around as students moved to their spots.

  She grabbed her binder, reading packet, and pencil and headed to the same place Wendy was headed.

  Wendy looked her up and down as she approached. Ariana didn’t break her stare. Wendy finally looked away as she reached a desk and sat down. Ariana did the same.

  There were three other students already there. One was one of Wendy’s friends. This is going to be interesting, she thought.

  She looked at her packet, trying to find something to talk about for when the teacher came around. A guy in their group, Sam, began talking right away. Meanwhile, Wendy was already whispering with her friend.

  “I give them another month. Maybe,” she heard her say quietly. “And if he doesn’t ditch her before she leaves, let’s just say I don’t think they’ll last long anyway.” Wendy glanced at her.

  Ariana’s jaw was tight and her hand squeezed her packet in her palm as she forced herself not to say something.

  She knew they had to be talking about her and Lucas.

  “I hear she hasn’t put out either. So it’s just a matter of time.” Wendy glanced at her again. Her friend was smiling.

  “What are you talking about?” she asked, not caring that the group was listening. She didn’t break her stare away from Wendy.

  “None of your business, sweetie,” Wendy replied.

  “I know you were talking about me. If you’re as tough as you think you are, why don’t you admit it?” The whole group was quiet now. Their half of the class started oohing. The teacher was on the other side of the room in an animated discussion with one of the groups.

  Wendy looked around briefly before bringing her gaze back to her. She leaned forward. She wasn’t in Ariana’s face, but it sure felt like it. “Lucas is going to come back to me. Just watch. You’re a distraction and nothing else. Do you really think he’s going to wait for you when I’m going to be right here?”

  Now the entire class was “oohing.”

  Ariana felt herself turn red. But she wasn’t sure if it was out of embarrassment or anger. Maybe both.

  She had no idea what to say to that, so she went with her impulses. There was no way she going to get pushed around by her. Before she knew it, she was out of her chair and in front of Wendy.

  Wendy stood up too, the sound of her chair scraping the tile floor echoing throughout the room

  Before she could do anything else, she heard the teacher yell, “Stop this instant. Get out of my class. Both of you. Now.”

  chapter twenty-two

  Tears flooded Ariana’s eyes as she fully realized what was going on.

  She had gone through this last semester with Wendy. The principal had given her another chance and just given her ISS, but she remembered his warning about this kind of thing happening again. What if she got ISS again? Or got suspended this time? The deal had been not to get into trouble again or it would go on her record.

  UGA would not be happy this kind of thing on her record. What if they changed their mind about her?

  She closed the classroom door behind her and went to the opposite side of the door that Wendy was at.

  She leaned back on the wall and closed her eyes, careful not to let any tears escape.

  She crossed her arms across her chest and waited for the teacher to come out.

  A minute of complete silence went by, and he was still inside the room.

  She glanced at Wendy, who was on her phone.

  She shook her head and stared in front of her.

  “What is your problem?” she asked before she could stop herself. She looked at Wendy when she didn’t immediately reply. She went on. “Can’t you see that Lucas and I are happy? What kind of person are you that you’re going to try to break us up?”

  Before she could even take a breath after she was done talking, Wendy was already facing her. “He was mine first. He loves me, and I know we’re going to be together again. It’s just a matter of time,” she said, dragging out her last three words.

  Some short guy Ariana didn’t know walked by with his student agenda in hand and stared until he disappeared around the corner.

  “Don’t you think that if he loved you, he would actually be with you?” Ariana said, almost laughing. Wendy had to be completely ridiculous, she thought.

  “How do you know he isn’t?”

  At that moment, the door opened and the teacher came out with two yellow slips. He handed them each one.

  “Principal’s office. Now. And if you two decide to cause another spectacle on your way there, rest assured that you will not walk at graduation.”

  Ariana nodded and began walking. She heard the classroom door shut behind her. She tried to focus on taking steps forward instead of the fact that Wendy was right behind her.

  ###

  “Another fight?” Jimmy asked at the end of the day. They were in the parking lot, leaning against their cars. Lucas had his arm around her.

  “Did you get expelled? Because that’s what I heard,” Mayra said.

  She shook her head. “Since it was really just an argument, the principal gave us ISS again. Two days this time.” She looked up at Lucas, who was staring at the ground.

  “But that’s like almost all of our last week,” Mayra said, her hands on her hips.

  “I know. It means I can’t skip on Senior Skip Day,” she said.

  “But that’s like the best part of freakin’ senior year,” Ma
yra complained. Jimmy laughed.

  “Don’t worry,” he said. “I’ll skip with you.”

  She bumped her hip into his but smiled.

  Ariana kept her arms crossed. How had her life come to this?

  She looked up at Lucas again. He was being way too quiet.

  Mayra suddenly grabbed Jimmy by the arm. “Come on. Let’s go for a walk.”

  Even though Mayra was supposed to ride the bus because she was still grounded, she was cheating today since her mom was at work. She realized there was no way for her to find out she was still riding with Ariana and Jimmy. Unless Ariana’s parents caught them. It was a risk they were willing to take, although Ariana had hesitated at first.

  Now that Mayra and Jimmy were temporarily gone, she turned around so she was facing Lucas.

  “What’s going through your head?”

  He sighed. “I don’t know. I just don’t know why you would let her get to you like that.”

  “Well, I couldn’t let her think she can treat me like that,” she said. “You should hear the things she says.”

  “I know. But you could have handled it better. Ignored her, I don’t know.”

  Ariana kept her mouth closed instead of talking, but she spoke up as another question popped into her head. “Do you still talk to her?”

  Lucas looked her in the eye. “Of course not. That’s in the past. I have no reason to talk to her.”

  Ariana nodded. “She is so crazy. She thinks she’s going to get back together with you.”

  “That is the last thing I would do. After we broke up, and she broke up with me, I got over it. But then she kept insisting we get back together. But I knew it was just not a good idea.”

  “Don’t get offended or anything, but why would you go out with her in the first place? She’s…you know how she is. Always involved in drama.”

  Lucas seemed to be staring off into space as he talked. “She wasn’t always like that. She used to be different. That’s why we eventually broke up. She began caring more about being popular and all that crap. It turned her into a different person.”

  Ariana thought about that.

  She hugged Lucas, and he squeezed her back. “This is all going to be over soon, and we’re going to miss it,” he said. “But I’m happy because it means I’ll get to spend more time with you, even if it means we’re that much closer to you leaving.”