Love and Dreams: The Coltrane Saga, Book 6
Page 4
They were to sail about the Greek islands for several days, and one morning Jade awoke to find Colt not beside her in bed. Raising up to peer out the porthole, she saw him at the railing of the deck, staring toward an island in the distance that appeared to be of coal, for all that was visible on land was black.
Curious, she donned a warm robe and went to join him in the brisk morning wind.
He did not hear her approach, was not aware of her presence until she gently touched his shoulder, and then he jumped, startled, staring at her for long seconds as if he had to stop and remember who she was.
This frightened Jade, and she stepped back. “Colt, what’s wrong? I’ve never seen you like this.”
He shook his head as though to clear it, and his laugh was forced, stilted. “I’m sorry. I guess it’s my turn to think about the past.” He looked once more to the black island, and a shadow crossed his eyes as he quietly murmured, “That’s Santorini.”
Jade gasped, silently chastising herself for not remembering or thinking how passing this way might affect Colt. She knew the story, for it was one Dani had confided long before Colt felt he could share it with her.
Santorini, with its precipitous cliffs more than six hundred feet high, looked completely black from a distance because of its strata of black rock which, along with russet soil, vestiges of gray lava, and veins of white pumice, were the results of a long-ago volcanic eruption.
It was to this Greek island that Colt and his father had pursued the culprit, Gavin Mason, in order to recover the vast fortune he’d swindled from Colt—with the help, albeit forced, of Briana.
Briana.
Jade could not help the wave of…what? Jealousy? Surely she was above that, but still, for a time, it seemed Briana had possession of Colt’s heart. But oh, what a sordid story it was, and she knew Colt didn’t like to be reminded of the ruse: how Gavin Mason had forced Briana to pretend she was Colt’s half-sister, Dani, whom Colt hadn’t seen since childhood, ultimately getting him drunk and making him think he’d seduced his own kin. He’d been so guilt-ridden he’d signed away his wealth and left town.
Later, of course, he’d come to his senses, realized the treachery, and followed Gavin and Briana all the way to France and on to Santorini. Gavin had been killed there by one of his own men. Colt had recovered his money…and Briana.
What had happened then? Jade wasn’t sure, exactly, but the important thing was that no matter that Colt and Briana had, for a time, been lovers, theirs was not the love of all ages. The fire had died, but from the look on Colt’s face, Jade knew Briana would always occupy a special place in his memory and his heart. But, she asked herself, so what? She was the one he’d loved enough to marry.
She moved into his arms, and he hugged her close and kissed her before whispering, “Everyone has their memories, my dear.”
“Yes, but the memories aren’t important unless they’re ours.”
They smiled at each other, and the sadness of the moment passed, as did the black island.
“We’ve been away long enough,” Colt said as they turned back toward their quarters. “Maybe it’s time we went back to Paris, said our farewells, and headed for home.”
“Home!” Jade whispered almost reverently. What a wonderful sound. What a wonderful thought. She took his fingertips, pressed them to her lips. “Yes, let’s do go home…to our future.”
Chapter Four
Jade and Colt’s arrival in Paris was a surprise, for their cruise had been scheduled to last a week longer. Kitty was delighted, though Travis’s ill health was a sad note to her welcome.
“Has he seen a doctor?” Colt asked worriedly. He and Jade and Kitty were having tea in Kitty’s parlor.
Kitty nodded, shrugging helplessly. “He said the same thing he said before, that it could be an old wound causing problems…maybe a bullet fragment moving around and getting too close to his heart. It might even be his heart. He doesn’t know. Neither do the doctors I’ve called in. But they agree on one thing, and I’ve seen it myself. When he’s rested and relaxed, there’s no pain, no upset stomach, no dizziness. So the prescription is: retire, don’t worry about anything, get lots of rest.”
“And what does he say to that?” Colt wanted to know.
Kitty got to her feet and began to pace restlessly about the room. “That’s what has me so worried—he agrees! He’s willing to move to Nice and spend the rest of his life lying in the sun or walking on the beach. That makes me think he’s even sicker than anyone is telling me.”
Jade and Colt exchanged anxious, sympathetic looks but said nothing as Kitty took hold of herself, forcing a smile to her lips.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to go into all that. I wouldn’t be surprised if worrying about Dani isn’t part of Travis’s stress, so I’m glad we’ll be moving soon.”
Colt quickly asked when that would be, and Kitty said as soon as the arrangements could be made. “We have to find a place in Nice, see how much of our furniture we have room for, sell the rest or give it to Dani and Drake.”
Jade felt a warm rush at the mention of her beloved friends and excitedly said, “I can’t wait to see them. I’m dying to tell Dani all about the wedding.”
Kitty said she’d already described everything. “But she’s anxious to hear your version. In fact…” She paused, pursing her lips thoughtfully as she remembered how Dani’s request had seemed almost desperate. “She made me promise to tell you to visit her as soon as you got here. She’ll be as glad as I am that you’re back early. I feel so sorry for her. She and Drake want this baby so much, and all we can do is pray she doesn’t lose it.”
Colt wanted to know just how Dani was doing, and Kitty explained that, again, the doctor was helpless to do anything except order her to rest. “She has to stay in bed. It’s the only way she can hope to carry it to term, and she’s got about five months to go.”
Kitty went to the door. “Let me run upstairs and see if your father is awake. If he is, he’ll want to see you. If he isn’t, I’m not going to wake him, as he needs his rest.”
She left them, and Colt moved to sit beside Jade. She knew he was justifiably worried about his family. After all, they were going far, far away, and chances were he’d never see his father again.
Tersely, he said, “We can’t worry him.”
Jade blinked, not understanding.
He looked at her, repeated, “We can’t worry him.” Then he explained, “No matter what happens, we can’t worry him or Dani. I’m sure we aren’t going to have any problems, but if we do, we won’t let the family know about it, agreed?”
Jade said of course. “But what could happen?”
“I’m not saying anything will, just that we have to be sure that all the letters we send home are cheerful. Mother isn’t young anymore, either, and she’s got enough on her mind without hearing our problems.”
Kitty then returned to say Travis was still sleeping. “I’ve asked the cook to fix a quick lunch, and then you should go on to see Dani and Drake. By the time you get back, he’ll be awake.”
After they’d eaten, they had the family carriage take them to the outskirts of Paris, only a few miles from Versailles, where Drake had built, and was still building, a three-story château in the middle of fifty acres he’d purchased. He and Dani were living in an apartment in the east wing while the rest of the house was being finished.
Jade and Colt were impressed, for already enough had been completed that it was obvious the house would be beautiful. Gardeners and workmen were busy digging ponds and laying the foundation for a sculptured garden of shrubs and flowers.
“Why so large a house?” Jade whispered as they made their way up the brick-sculptured walkway to the front doors. “Even if Dani is able to have this baby, surely she won’t risk having another, so they can’t be planning for a big family.”
Colt agreed it seemed odd but surmised they had to spend their money on something. “Why not a mansion to rival Versailles?”
Colt lifted the large brass knocker, shaped like a lion’s head, and let it clang to announce their arrival.
Drake saw their carriage from the window and opened the door to them. Jade happily threw herself into his arms. They embraced warmly; then Drake heartily shook Colt’s hand in greeting and congratulations. “I wish I could’ve been there,” he apologized. “I hear the reception was more exciting than the wedding,” he added with a wink.
Colt jovially agreed, daring to say, “I’m glad it was Tamara who discovered we’d sneaked away. I always thought she was a nosy little snit, anyway.”
“You can say that again.” Drake laughed.
Jade made a face at Colt. “Go on, make fun of my family. I’m sure in years to come I’ll find lots to laugh at about yours!” But she really wasn’t angry, since she herself had always found Tamara obnoxious.
Drake led the way past ladders and paint buckets and workmen to the wing in which he and Dani lived, away from all the noisy work. He explained that it might take as long as five years to complete what they planned to do. “I’ve already had to rent storage space in Paris for the furniture and decorator pieces I keep buying. Every time I see something I think Dani might like, I get it, figuring if she doesn’t, I can sell it later.”
They stepped into a cozy and lovely parlor. The wallpaper pattern was of shaded greens against a cream background, and there was intricate carved wainscoting of Brazilian rosewood. A small stone fireplace was set in one wall, and windows trimmed with draperies of butter-yellow brocade looked out on the sloping, not-yet-completed east garden.
Jade sat down on the walnut settee, noticed the strangeness of its twin-chair construction with solid back splats, and ball and claw legs with scallop shell decoration on the knees.
Drake took a seat beside her, noted her interest in the piece, and explained, “It’s a real antique. Kitty says it probably goes back to the early 1700s.” He nodded at the chairs opposite. “Like those. The cabriole legs date them. I’m afraid I don’t know much about antiques. I just buy what I think Dani would like. She hasn’t been able to shop with me in a long time. She…” his voice trailed off, and he rubbed at his temples with his fingertips, as though a sudden headache had struck, “… isn’t strong, you know,” he finished lamely.
Jade placed a gentle hand on his knee and asked, “How is she, Drakar?” She used his given name, his Russian name, for she’d never gotten used to Dani’s adaptation. “How is she, really?”
“Weak.” He shook his head miserably. “The least thing tires her. She has to stay in bed, I know that, but it’s making a vegetable out of her, just lying there, staring at the ceiling. God, nearly five months to go…”
Colt dared to blurt, “Maybe it’d be best if she went ahead and lost the baby, Drake, and you two just gave up on having children. With her history, her mother dying in childbirth and—”
Drake shot him an incredulous look, as though he had to be insane to dare make such a statement.
Colt hurried to explain, not wanting to offend. “It’s none of my business, I know, but I think you have to ask yourself if it’s worth it. She might die, and meanwhile, it’s making life hell for both of you.”
A nerve in Drake’s jaw tensed, and for an instant, Jade feared his temper would explode. Even she was shocked that Colt could be so cruelly outspoken with his opinion, but then, it had been on her mind as well—the question of how Drakar and Dani could even consider trying to have a baby, especially so soon after she had miscarried.
Then, to her astonishment, Drakar seemed to slump in defeated frustration, and. murmured in a voice so low as to be barely audible, “You’re probably right, but we’ve got to see it through now and hope for the best…pray for the best. But whatever happens, this has got to be the last time. I love her, and she means more to me than having a baby.”
Jade hugged him, and he kissed her cheek and told her Dani would be angry if she knew he was keeping her. “She’s really been looking forward to your visit. Come along.”
She followed him from the parlor, down a short hallway that turned several times, and then they entered a large room splashed with sunshine from big floor-to-ceiling windows.
“Jade! Oh, Jade!”
Rushing across the gold-and-turquoise rug, Jade warmly met Dani’s outstretched arms. After a moment, she pulled away and sat down to glance in admiration at the ornate upholstered bed with its elaborate needlework trimmings on headboard and tester, then exulted, “You look like a princess, so dainty and pretty in this gorgeous bed and that beautiful gown you’re wearing.”
Dani beamed. “The bed is something Drake and I found when we were in England right after we married. We had it in storage the last time you were here. I think it’s my favorite piece.” She smiled broadly. “I understand you’re a real princess now—a very special wedding gift from the Czar himself. I want to hear all about it—everything.” She waved a hand airily. “Kitty gave me her version, but I’ll bet yours is more exciting…especially the part about your sneaking away at the reception.”
Jade laughed. “That, I think, made a bigger impression on everyone than the wedding itself.”
Briefly, she described the mischief, and Dani laughed, delighted to hear such a tale. But as Jade spoke, she was thinking how pale Dani looked, an almost ghostlike deity propped against the soft pink pillows. She seemed so thin, her cheeks hollow, sunken, and her eyes had lost their familiar happy sparkle. It was obvious she’d lost weight, yet her rounded tummy beneath the sheets gave testimony to her delicate condition.
Suddenly Dani interrupted accusingly, “You’re thinking how terrible I look.”
Jade gasped, surprised and embarrassed.
“You have the same look on your face everyone gets when they come in here. You look at me and think how sick I look…how I won’t be able to have this baby.
“But I will!” She glared at Jade, her eyes hot with determination. “I’m going to carry this baby the full time, and it’s going to live. I know it, because I feel it in my heart.”
Jade was suddenly very uncomfortable and did not know how to react to Dani’s outburst. Somewhat hesitantly, she said, “Well, I’m sure both of you will be fine, and—”
“Listen to me!” Dani turned on her side, raised up on one elbow to stare at Jade with an expression of desperation in her need to make herself understood. “I’ve lain here for almost three months. I took to this bed as soon as I thought there was the slightest possibility I might be pregnant, and I’ve been here ever since—because I want this baby more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life!” She bit out the declaration.
Jade could only stare at her in wonder, then decided it best to let her say whatever was on her mind. If she could help by lending a sympathetic ear, she was more than willing.
Dani leaned back once more, her hair fanning out on the pillow. She gazed up at the ceiling for long moments, her breath harsh and ragged, then becoming even; and when it did, she began to speak again, but it was more to herself than to Jade. “Being alone as much as I have, I’ve come to really know myself, as though up till now I wasn’t a real person, a real being. It’s as though that ceiling up there, that I stare at for so long I almost become hypnotized, is actually a mirror to my soul. I’ve seen things that were there all my life probably, but I had to have this time to find them, to uncover the real me. If nothing else comes from this time, then I’ve this much to be thankful for. I know who I am…but most important, I know why I am.”
She gave a short, bitter laugh, reached to pat Jade’s hand. “You think I’m crazy, don’t you? You think I’m losing my mind. It’s not so bad, really. Drake spends as much time as he can with me, but there’s the rest of the house to be built, and he keeps an eye on the shop, the people who’re running it when Kitty isn’t there, and more and more lately she isn’t, because of my father, but that’s all right. I understand. I want
her to be with him.”
Jade sensed Dani had a reason for this speech. She did not have long to wait to get her explanation.
Dani suddenly reached out to clutch Jade’s arm, nails digging into flesh almost painfully. “I want you to promise me something, Jade. I want you to promise me that if I die, you will take my baby and raise it as your own.”
Jade’s eyes widened. Her lips parted, but she could make no sound. Never could she have guessed what was behind Dani’s bizarre behavior. Finally, she stammered, “I—I don’t know what to say, Dani. You know Colt and I would both be willing to do that, but it isn’t going to be necessary. Besides,” she pointed out, unsure of Dani’s motivation, “Drakar is the father, and surely he’d object.”
A bittersweet smile came to Dani’s lips. “Drake knows how I feel, and he loves me enough to abide by my wishes, even if it means giving up his child.”
Jade shook her head, feeling dizzy with bafflement. “But why? Why on Earth would you want him to give up his baby? Why wouldn’t you trust him to raise it? He can afford the best of everything.”
“Drake is a handsome, virile man, and even though he doesn’t think so now, he’d marry again. My child would represent me in his wife’s eyes. She’d take out any jealousy for me and the love Drake and I shared on that child.
“Oh, Jade, don’t you see?” She grasped her arm once again, looking quite desperate. “I know only too well how jealousy and resentment can be channeled to a child. My aunt had an affair with my father, but he married my mother, and my aunt never got over that. Her hatred increased when he killed the other man in her life in a gunfight. Consciously or subconsciously, she took it all out on me, and I don’t want my child to be touched by anything similar. Drake loves me, and he’ll never be able to love a woman in quite the same way, and just as my mother realized that fact with Travis’s love for Kitty, so will any second wife of Drake’s.”
She drew in a harsh breath, let it out slowly. “Now do you understand my request? And why Drake will abide by it?”