A Reason to Sing

by Michelle Lindo-Rice

  “She’s good. She’s enjoying her twins, Malcolm and Martin. You know she’s a civil rights activist?”

  Brian chuckled. “That’s my girl. A fighter through and through.”

  “She’s excited for us,” Karlie said. Tanya had learned of their relationship along with the rest of the world through YouTube. Her cell rang and she picked up.

  Brian thought he heard Ryan’s voice. He noted Karlie’s disappointment and zoned in on her words.

  “Oh, okay. Yes… Yes, I understand… Okay, I’ll let him know.” She ended the call.

  “What was that about?” he asked.

  “Ryan can’t make it tonight. Something’s wrong with his fiancé. He’s on his way to the hospital.”

  “There will always be something. Always.” He rubbed the stubble on his chin. “And who is this mystery woman? It’s like he pulled a fiancé out of thin air.”

  She tapped the bridge of her nose. “I think he said her name was Melanie or, was it Megan? I’m not too sure.”

  “Never heard of her.”

  “Ryan’s on a good path. He’s even involved in a project at church to help future young entrepreneurs. Every Tuesday night, he meets with them for an hour to give business advice.”

  Brian bit back the jealousy, reminding himself Ryan was not his real father. Yet he was upset that Ryan was now willing to help other young men when he had been too busy for Brian as a child.

  His face must have mirrored his thoughts because Karlie said, “I think he’s trying to make amends for how he was with you. He loves you. You know that, right?”

  A waitress came and gathered their plates then discreetly left the bill.

  Brian gave a brief nod. When would the hurt of his past diminish? He realized it was something he needed to put before God in prayer. Brian didn’t want any old baggage to destroy his new future. He remembered the Bible verse that said if you put new wine into an old bottle, it would burst. Brian knew that was a possibility if he wasn’t able to reconcile his past.

  “That’s why I don’t think you should accept this internship,” Karlie continued. “I know you’re angry at Ryan, but I don’t think you’d be able to betray him in any way.” Her gentle tone registered with his heart.

  However, another part of him felt Ryan had to pay for his sins. His ‘father’ needed to do some reaping for all the bad sowing he had done.

  “It’s not about betraying him. It’s about the people he has hurt and stomped on then left without an afterthought. It’s about his business ethics and practices. Innocent people suffer while his bank account grows exponentially.”

  “I understand how you feel, and I’m not trying to make light of your experience as a child. I’m not condoning what Ryan may have done. But why does it have to be you to seek retribution? You’re doing God’s job. I choose to believe God is more concerned about saving a soul than making him pay.”

  “Some souls cannot be saved.”

  Karlie’s eyes widened. His words hung between them. She drew back in her chair. Her eyes glistened. “I can’t believe you would fix your mouth to say that. The man you’re callously dismissing is my father. He’s always going to be in our lives.”

  “He was my father first,” Brian pointed out. “I know him better than you. There’s no changing him. His lips might say he loves God, but his heart is far from Him.”

  Her eyes flashed. “Then I’ll be the God he sees. I didn’t give up on you, and I won’t give up on Ryan.”

  Brian looked at the determined tilt of her chin and knew this argument was futile. He took several bills from his wallet and tossed them on the table.

  “I don’t want Ryan coming between us,” he said. “I love you. I want to be with you. Ryan doesn’t factor into this equation. I’ve forgiven him but forgiveness doesn’t mean I’m going to open myself to him to face the same abuse.”

  “You think that by keeping him at a distance, you can keep your heart safe? It’s impossible,” Karlie said. “You already love him. Love doesn’t die that easy. That’s why you’re so mad. Deep down, you hate that you love him. No matter how evil you think Ryan is, you love him. You’re too stubborn to admit it.”

  Karlie’s words pierced his heart, but he refused to acknowledge their truth. Brian jutted his jaw and ignored the plea in her eyes. “If I get that internship, I’m taking it.”

  “And you absolutely should. Just don’t involve yourself in Ryan’s case if that becomes a factor. That would be a major conflict of interest.”

  Oh, but that conflict was of major interest to him.

  Karlie changed the topic to discuss wedding venues, and Brian went along with her though the internship possibility swirled in his mind.

  Brian needed to know if the man he had emulated for most of his life was a murderer.

  Ch. 8

  “What about Cooper?” Megan asked as Ryan sped up the driveway. She was laid out on a stretcher and being led toward a waiting ambulance. The workers he had hired were heading toward their vehicles.

  “We’ll be back tomorrow!” a burly man yelled before getting into his car. “When we’re done, I’ll send you the bill!”

  “I saw her go down and had to bust the window to get inside,” a thin but muscular man said.

  Ryan nodded, too distracted to pay close attention. His eyes were glued on the woman being rolled down the driveway.

  The thin man came up to him. “I’ll have to order glass to repair the window. It’s taped for now.”

  “Thank you,” Ryan said. “I appreciate all you did. I’ll take your card. Expect a call from my assistant, Prim Baker.” Prim Baker had been with Ryan for years. She was efficient and knew him so well Ryan knew he could never replace her.

  The man smiled.

  Ryan made a mental note to reward him for potentially saving Megan’s life.

  Ryan strove to catch his breath. He had never driven that fast since he was in his twenties. His Lincoln was parked at a bad angle, but he wasn’t concerned about getting rear-ended. His only concern was the woman before him. “I’ll take him,” he said. “I’ll get Cooper and follow behind in the ambulance.”

  Megan sobbed. “No. I don’t want you near him.”

  The EMT’s gave him some hard stares.

  “Sweetheart, you know you can trust me.” He walked over to whisper into her ear. “Cooper will be safer with me than with a social worker.”

  Megan attempted to sit up. “I’m fine. I don’t have to go to the emergency room. I just want my son.”

  One of the emergency workers spoke up, “You need to get checked out to make sure everything is fine.”

  Cooper’s wail echoed from inside the house. Ryan decided to take charge. He looked at the men. “Where are you taking her?”

  They didn’t look as if they were about to answer.

  “I’m her fiancé!” he shouted. “Tell me where you’re taking her.”

  “Franklin General,” one of them said.

  “He’s not… he’s not,” Megan cried. “He’s…” She broke down into tears.

  Ryan’s heart felt fear. Had Megan suffered a heart attack? Or a stroke? “I’ll be right behind you,” Ryan said. “I’ll get the baby.” He looked at Megan. “Where’s the car seat?”

  Megan flopped back onto the stretcher with a hand over her face. Her body shook as she sobbed. “Cooper… Cooper…”

  The ambulance peeled away.

  He waved off the rest of the workers and dashed inside. Cooper’s cries were so loud his ears rang. Ryan rushed to pick up the toddler. He felt the squish of a full diaper and wrinkled his nose.

  Ryan raced upstairs and entered one of the bedrooms. He scanned the neatly kept space of deep purples and gold before going into the adjacent room. He hastened toward the changing table, rested Cooper on it and undid his diaper. Ryan held his breath as he cleaned him up and put on a fresh diaper. He then searched for a jacket, since it was nippy outside.

  Once Cooper was ready, he wiped his brow and look
ed at his watch. He had to get going. He scooped Cooper into his arms. “Now, where did Mommy put her keys?”

  “Keys,” Cooper said. He pointed and kicked. “Keys.”

  Ryan decided to follow Cooper’s finger. He found the keys on the console table by the staircase. Ryan spotted Megan’s purse and decided to grab it. She would need her medical insurance card and license. He kissed Cooper on the cheek. “Good job, son. You’re so smart!”

  Cooper kicked and giggled. Ryan bounded down the stairs and unlocked the Lexus RC coupe. For a second, he thought about taking Megan’s car, but there was no way he could wrap his body into that small space.

  He put Cooper on the front seat and fought with the contraption in the back. After several poor attempts, Ryan managed to get the car seat out. He rushed over to his vehicle and strapped the car seat inside. As he struggled to secure the car seat, he mumbled, “I have two business degrees and can’t figure out how to work a car seat. I need to redesign this.” Ryan heard the click and wiped his brow. His dress shirt was soaked with perspiration. “Finally.”

  Ryan’s eyes widened.

  Cooper.

  He had left the boy in the front seat of Megan’s car with the keys inside. Ryan sprinted over to the other car. His mouth fell open when he saw Cooper hitting the glass. “No. No. Cooper!” he shouted. “Please, God, don’t let him touch the lock button.”

  He made a dive, but it was as if Cooper had read his mind. Ryan could only watch as a scene from a sad Lifetime movie unfolded before him. The lock clicked with Cooper inside. “Cooper!” Ryan yelled.

  Cooper smiled, revealing a gap-toothed grin.

  Ryan raced through the yard to find something to break the window. Megan was going to chop him up and use his carcass as fertilizer. Some hero he was turning out to be. Ryan found a piece of metal from the broken window. It would have to do.

  He pressed his face to the glass. “Cooper, sit on the floor.” Cooper jumped up and down, the keys in his hand. “Cooper, sit on the floor.” Ryan repeated it several times. His heart was beating so fast he feared he was going to end up in the emergency room with Megan. “Good boy,” he praised when Cooper obeyed.

  “All right. Here goes nothing.” Ryan went to the rear right window and swung hard. He said a prayer for the glass to shatter in the back. His powerful blow cracked the window on his first try. Ryan lifted his hands. “Thank you, Jesus.” He yelled. “I’m coming, Cooper. Don’t move, son.”

  He reached his hand inside to get to the lock and prayed he wouldn’t cut an artery on the glass. Just as his fingers touched the tip, he heard the doors unlock.

  “Open,” Cooper said, squatting on the floor. He held up the keys and gave Ryan a grin.

  “You could open it?” Ryan’s voice boomed as he opened the door. Megan was going to kill him. He wondered if he could get the car repaired before she returned home. Ryan wasn’t sure, but he would try.

  Cooper must have been scared at his loud voice because his bottom lip quivered. He released a huge wail.

  Ryan lifted him out of the car. “It’s all right, son. It’s all right.”

  Cooper stopped mid-cry and reached for Ryan’s nose. It was as if his little hand had touched Ryan’s heart instead.

  “Poor little fella,” he crooned. “It’s okay. I’ve got you.”

  Cooper answered with a loud cry. “Mama!”

  Ryan soothed him and patted him on the back. “Your mama’s fine. I’ve got you. Daddy’s got you.” Ryan knew it was presumptuous to use the word, Daddy, but he felt such a strong connection with the boy. He closed his eyes, savoring the feel of Cooper in his arms. Cooper settled and rested his head on Ryan’s shoulders. Ryan smiled. He remembered Brian had been a fussy baby. On the rare times when Ryan was home, he would cuddle Brian for hours.

  Ryan hummed a lullaby. “Hush, little baby…” His voice sounded rusty. Ryan cleared his throat and tried again. He sang as he strapped Cooper inside his car. He sang as he got behind the wheel. He sang all the way to the hospital. Ryan pulled into the emergency entrance and found parking.

  When he looked into the rearview mirror, Cooper was asleep. His long lashes almost touched his cheeks. It had been some time since Ryan sang. He looked at Cooper and smiled. He had now found a reason to sing again. Two reasons, actually. And if he had his way, he would never let them go.

  Ch. 9

  “Here’s your purse,” the nurse said. “We’ll let your fiancé know you’re okay. He’s out there pacing like a tiger in a cage.” The nurse fluffed her pillows and settled the blanket around her. “And your son is so adorable. You’d better hold onto those handsome men of yours. The doctor will be in to speak with you. He’s reviewing your scans, so it should only be a couple minutes.”

  Megan held back a snort. A couple minutes in doctor time meant a half hour.

  Wait a minute. Megan furrowed her brows at something the nurse said. Fiancé? “I don’t have…” She shrugged. She didn’t have the strength to correct yet another person. The real culprit was the oaf hovering near her door. She had caught sight of Ryan holding her baby and had had to resist the urge to snatch Cooper out of his arms.

  The nurse departed the room as swiftly as she had entered.

  Megan willed herself to be patient. She had already been taken through a battery of exams and was now hooked up to an IV, a heart monitor, and an EKG. Megan wanted two things: to hold her son and to go home.

  The curtain swayed, and she saw Cooper’s pudgy legs. At least one of her wishes was about to be granted. Megan’s heart lifted and tears filled her eyes.

  He kicked and giggled. “Mama!”

  Megan held out her arms.

  “He’s been asking for you,” Ryan said. He handed over Cooper and reached down as if he wanted to kiss her cheek.

  Megan gave him a light push. She couldn’t believe his nerve. The stats on the machine began to beep furiously. Megan’s heart was beating fast. This made the nurse rush back inside her room. She asked Ryan to wait outside.

  “What’s going on?” he asked.

  “Sir, please wait outside.”

  Ryan looked as if he wanted to argue, but the nurse wasn’t having it. Ryan took Cooper and went on the other side of the curtain while she checked Megan’s vitals.

  “Your vitals look good,” the nurse said, reading the heart monitor and shaking her head. “I don’t understand what’s causing you such distress.”

  Megan took deep breaths, but her heart continued to race. She wondered what was wrong with her. Would she need surgery, and if so, what would happen to Cooper? She hadn’t been to church much since Jackson’s death and didn’t feel comfortable calling on the church sisters now.

  Ryan peeked inside. “Is she okay?”

  As soon as Megan saw him, the monitors began beeping. The nurse’s eyes narrowed. She gave Megan a pointed look. “Is he upsetting you?”

  Ryan took a tentative step backward.

  Megan wanted to yell that Ryan Oakes had been upsetting her from the day she met him, but she shook her head. He had her son. She had no one else to call. The monitors continued clanging, which would surely give her a headache. The nurse adjusted something and the beeping ceased.

  The nurse gently patted Megan’s back. “Take deep breaths.”

  Megan complied, allowing the soothing voice to calm her nerves.

  Ryan moved closer. He rested Cooper on the edge of the bed. “Yes, honey, you have to calm down. I’m here.”

  Megan began to cry. “You’re here and he’s not. He should be here.” She broke into a sob. “I can’t do this alone. I miss Jackson.”

  “Try to relax,” the nurse said.

  Megan covered her face. “I need Jackson.” Her shoulders shook with the force of her sobs. “Lord, it’s too much. I can’t do this. I can’t…”

  The nurse asked. “Who’s Jackson, dear?” Her loving tone was Megan’s undoing. The nurse’s cheery disposition reminded her of Megan’s grandmother. Her Nana—Megan’s only re
lative—had been Megan’s rock. Sadly, Gloria had died a few months before Megan met Jackson.

  Megan wiped her face. “My husband,” she sobbed.

  The nurse rested a hand on her hips and tilted her head toward Ryan. “But, isn’t he your fiancé?”

  Ryan opened his mouth but the nurse raised a hand and arched her eyebrow. She looked like a mama bear, and Ryan must have thought better than to argue.

  “Answer my question, love,” the nurse said.

  Megan shook her head. “He’s not my husband.”

  The nurse eyed Ryan with suspicion and then gave Megan a pointed look. “Do you need me to call someone?”

  “Ma’am, she’s confused,” Ryan said, speaking up in a firm tone. “Megan’s with me. Her husband died some time ago.”

  Megan gritted her teeth because he was laying on the charm.

  “I love this woman and hope to make her my wife. Believe me when I tell you that’s the truth.”

  Megan felt her eyes widen. Ryan sounded so convincing she almost believed him. She opened her mouth to expose him as a snaggle-toothed liar when someone entered. Her shoulders slumped when she saw it wasn’t the doctor. What was taking so long?

  “Excuse me,” the young lady said, smiling. “I’m with billing.”

  Dread lined Megan’s stomach like scum around a bathtub. “My insurance lapsed.” She closed her eyes. “I need to get out of here. How am I supposed to pay for all of this?” She broke down and cried again. This time Cooper began to cry along with her.

  Ryan placed Cooper next to her, cleared his throat and said, “May I speak to you outside?” Ryan and the lady from billing moved out of the room.

  Megan was too distraught to tell him to mind his own business. She felt a little hand on her leg and reached for her son. Megan wrapped her arms around him and inhaled Cooper’s scent, trying to draw strength from his little arms.

  “Hush, Mama,” he said. His hands slapped her face as he tried to wipe her tears. Megan kissed Cooper on the cheek.

  She whispered, “Lord, I need You.”