A Cut so Deep (Thornes & Roses Book 1)

by Dani René

  Cassian nods once more. “Not because he thinks you’re only here for status or money, or anything like that. It’s just how his mind portrayed love as a lie, and his beliefs turned all the good into something sinister. Knowing how my parents used each other stuck with him.”

  “I understand.”

  “Do you love him?” Cassian asks, as he kills the engine and turns to look at me. His eyes shimmer, more green than blue. It’s a beautiful color. As endless as Damien’s and Finn’s.

  “I think I do. It’s not easy to say those words,” I tell him, “I wasn’t brought up in the most loving home either. My mother was more concerned with her latest award or the next movie deal. So, I understand why he’s hesitant.”

  “Don’t take how he is with you for granted. I’ve never seen him like this,” Cassian tells me, before he pushes his door open, “but also, don’t expect too much from him too soon.”

  “I won’t.”

  That’s the end of our heart to heart, and I’m thankful for it. Even though I knew that Damien wouldn’t come to terms with the thought of loving someone, he’s still allowing himself to care. And that’s all I can ask for.

  I follow Cass inside and make a beeline for my bedroom. Inside, I grab a hanger and drape the dress, hiding it in my closet. If Damien walks in here, I don’t want him to see it before tomorrow night.

  The moment my bedroom door whooshes open, I feel him. He steps inside, stopping beside my bed as I’m shutting the closet. His gaze narrows, sweeping over the room and notices the empty bag, the shoe box, but that’s all he can find.

  “Did you get a dress?”

  “Yeah,” I tell him, crossing my arms, to keep from showing him just how nervous I am.

  Without a word, Damien closes the distance between us, and the air thickens with hunger. It’s as if he can devour me with merely a glance. His hands grip my hips, and he holds me steady. One of his hands releases me, and with that, he tips my chin, so I’m looking into those cerulean orbs.

  “Where is it?”

  “You’ll see it tomorrow.” My voice is a failed attempt at sounding confident. I’m met with a smirk, dark and devious, just like he wants.

  “If you’re showing any skin tomorrow, I will punish you, and this time, it most certainly won’t end with you coming all over my hand.” His promise is laced with lust—rabid and feral.

  “I don’t doubt it,” I tell him, attempting to sound calm, but my hands are shaking like a leaf in a summer breeze. I want to turn away, to sit down, but I’m suddenly hoisted up against Damien’s rigid body, and he walks us over to the bed where he sets me down.

  Seconds later, he’s reaching behind him and pulling a small black velvet box from his pocket. He hands it to me before saying, “I got you something that I want you to wear.”

  My heart is thudding wildly, and I’m thankful he didn’t drop to one knee when he pulled it out because I may have fainted from the sweetness of his gesture.

  I flick open the lid. Inside, nestled on the darkest velvet, is a gold rose with small thorns adorning the stem. The shimmering ruby that sits in the center of the bud is beautifully carved, fitting strikingly in the setting. Attached to the rose is a sleek choker that I tug from the cushion.

  “This is exquisite. But I don’t know if I can wear it.”

  “Why?”

  I glance up, meeting his questioning stare. “It’s too much, Damien.”

  “You’re a Thorne, but you’re also a rose. My wild rose.” He watches me intently, his eyes boring into me like they always do, but this time those flames that usually dance only with desire, now offer more.

  Affection.

  Caring.

  And an emotion I’d rather not voice, even to myself.

  But then he says, “My rose.”

  28

  Damien

  With a quick glance at the clock, I sigh, knowing we’ll be late if she doesn’t come down the fucking stairs in the next few moments.

  I didn’t think Nesrin would be here for long. I figured she’d just turn around and head back to the city because that’s what she grew up with. City lights and streets paved with dreams.

  She has certainly changed my mind about her. Since the first day I saw her, I had an idea in mind as to what she was like. But she’s not only offered me a calm and solace I never thought I’d have. Nesrin has also tormented my demons, dragging them to the forefront, calling them to come out and play.

  Tonight is a test. She knows about the dance, but she doesn’t realize that, afterward, if I really want to claim her as mine, this town doesn’t like anything they deem forbidden. They don’t like rules being broken. And Nesrin and I are going to make them talk.

  Even though my plan is to head to England when Daddy Dearest returns, I want to ensure she’s safe. Her being here alone doesn’t sit well with me. But the thought of dragging her across the ocean, that might work.

  I wanted to fight my feelings for her. I should’ve fought my attraction, but I knew the girl who watched me in the greenhouse the night of our parents’ wedding reception would be mine.

  She is everything I craved, and she gives me everything I need. I think back to the night of the party when she was talking to Creed. Her laugh echoed across to me, and even then, I knew I would kill him before I allowed him to have her.

  But she doesn’t know the truth. And I’m going to have to tell her everything. Perhaps not tonight. Maybe I can delay it till tomorrow.

  Suddenly, Nesrin appears at the top of the staircase. Her hair has been curled around her shoulders, which are bare. The halter neck of the dress is bound, holding up the sleek material, which seems to be painted to every curve of her body.

  The moment she takes a step, her left leg bares itself to me, as the slit opens from her ankle, all the way up to her smooth, slender thigh.

  Jesus fucking Christ Almighty.

  “You’re not wearing that,” I bite out, as raging jealousy courses through me. I take a step, but she lifts her hand and stops me as she reaches the bottom of the steps.

  “I’m a grown woman, Damien. I am yours, but I also have my own mind. If you can’t trust me,” she says, squaring her shoulders, “then we may as well go separately.” Her chin tips upward, and that familiar fire in her gaze dances wildly, challenging me to argue.

  “You’re going to be the death of me one day, wild rose,” I tell her. “And it’s not you I don’t trust. It’s all those men who’ll be in attendance.”

  “They can’t touch me without my permission,” she bites out, and I have to agree. Because if they come anywhere near her with their filthy hands, I’ll kill them all.

  I lift the mask I’d been holding and offer it to her. The intricate silver design looks like lace, which will curve and mold to her face perfectly. She smiles, moving slowly toward me. The choker I gave her fits snugly around the delicate column of her neck, and I can’t stop the grin that tilts my lips.

  “You do look exquisite. Thankfully, you’re all mine,” I tell her, as I lean in to press my lips to hers. She’s got a darker shade of lip color on; it’s not shimmering or glossy, but the contrast of the deep red with her caramel skin looks like it was made just for her.

  “Thank you. You scrub up well,” she informs me, with a naughty grin on her pretty face. No, she’s not just pretty. This woman is flawless.

  “Tonight, you stay beside me. I don’t want you alone with Creed. At all.”

  “What happened between the two of you?” she questions, and my heart stops for a short moment. My chest tightens, and I’m not sure how to answer her because, if I do, I’ll have to tell her the truth. The reason she’s here, the reason I chose her, and also, who she really is.

  “Why don’t we enjoy this evening, and when we get home, we can talk,” I suggest, not wanting to spoil the ball for her. As much as I know she needs to learn what’s been hidden from her, I can’t bring myself to utter the words.

  I pushed it to the back of my mind for weeks. A
nd, before that, I knew the time would come when I would need to tell her everything, but not right now.

  “Let’s go.”

  We make our way to the car, and I open the door, allowing her to slip into the backseat. Our driver nods when I round the vehicle, giving him the gesture that we’re ready.

  Since Cass and Finn are gone already, we can have some privacy on our drive into town and then back out toward the castle. The darkness swallows us as the Thorne driver, Hank, takes us to the party.

  “What happens at this event?” Nesrin asks, but her voice is low, whispered along the air between us. Do I tell her?

  “Tonight, we will drink, dance, and then we’ll watch the initiation into the town for newcomers.” I didn’t want to tell her about this part until we were at the castle, but I need her to be confident when she walks in there. If she knew what fear does to these assholes, she wouldn’t want to be by my side tonight taking them head-on.

  “What kind of initiation?”

  I don’t want to respond. I remain silent and pull out my cell phone. Scrolling through the names, I hit dial on Cassian’s number and press the device to my ear.

  “What’s up, Brother?”

  “Are you at the castle?” I ask quickly. I can feel Nesrin’s gaze burning a hole through the side of my face.

  “Yeah. The Havens are here. With the rest of The Black Knights.” There’s a warning lacing his words, and my stomach turns. “She’s here, too.”

  “Fuck.” The plan we’ve carefully constructed is slowly falling apart. The person I was hoping wouldn’t make an appearance is there. Instead of panicking, I nod to myself.

  “Keep her company. We’ll be there in five,” I tell him. “When we arrive, I want her gone.” I hang up before Cassian can give me shit about the orders that I’ve just given him.

  “What’s going on?” Nesrin’s curious nature is going to get her into trouble tonight. All I wanted was this godforsaken party to go off without a hitch. I got too close to Nesrin, when all I was meant to do is keep her in line. But now that I’m invested, I know I can’t walk away.

  “I hope you’re ready for this,” I tell her, keeping my tone cool. “Because tonight may be difficult for everyone involved.” I can’t meet her gaze, as I say this, because I’m guilty.

  The lie that’s been eating me up from inside is going to spill free and poison us both. I should’ve told her the truth when I first met her. But I couldn’t. I didn’t realize I’d feel like this about her, and now, I’m on the way to my own fucking reckoning.

  “Are you okay?” Nesrin’s hand lands on my thigh, which causes me to turn my attention on her. I finally lock eyes with her and see all the questions that are dancing in those pretty eyes.

  “At the end of this, all I want you to do is not hate me.” I reach for her, pulling her onto my lap and grip her hips. “Promise me.” I’m pleading like a fucking asshole.

  “What are you talking about?” She tips her head to the side, regarding me with such confusion it steals my breath. “I can’t hate you, Damien. Even if I tried.” Her hands cup my face, her heat searing my crotch, and her sweet smile worsening my guilt.

  “Nothing.” I shake my head, attempting to calm the fuck down. I can work through this. Snaking my hand between her splayed thighs, I tease the silky material of her panties, feeling her wetness soak through. “Someone is thinking dirty thoughts.” I attempt to distract her, but I have a feeling Nesrin won’t be swayed easily.

  “You touching me won’t change the fact that you’re worried about something.” Her voice breaks and her breathing hitches when I press against her clit. “Damien.” My name comes out a breathy murmur that only serves to make me hard beneath her.

  “Like I said, tonight you will be mine. I’m going to dance with you, I’m going to drink champagne with you, and when I take you home, you’re going straight into my bedroom, and I’m going to rip this poor fucking excuse for a dress off, and I’m going to fuck you.”

  Her eyes snap open, and her mouth parts into a perfectly formed O that would wrap perfectly around my dick. Her hips roll, her fingers dig into my shoulders, and her panties become slick with her arousal. One. Two. Three. And then she’s shaking above me, taking her pleasure, like I know she enjoys.

  “Dirty fucking girl,” I growl, leaning in to inhale her perfume that’s been gently applied to her neck. “And don’t you dare forget who owns that pretty pussy that’s just soaked my fingers.” The reminder sends another wave of trembling through her before I set her down and straighten my jacket.

  We pull up to the entrance of the large, looming castle, and before Nesrin can move, I lift my fingers to my nose and inhale her scent. Her shock is clear, and I can’t help but smile.

  “All mine.” With a wink, I push open my door, as Hank pulls open Nesrin’s. We meet at the pathway toward the entrance, as she slides her arm through mine.

  The perfect couple.

  And a perfectly formed lie.

  29

  Nesrin

  When I have a second to really take in the building before us, I’m astounded that it really does look like a castle. The windows are small; yet, they offer up yellow light that streams outward.

  Each turret has a darkened hole where I can imagine you would get an impeccable view. Along the second floor are two long balconies that overlook the driveway, which I’m guessing come from a couple of bedrooms.

  Built with dark brick, it reminds me of the historic castles in Scotland. Most of them are falling apart, merely ruins, but this one is immaculate. The door is a large archway drenched in golden light, as two butlers stand on either side receiving guests with a smile.

  Damien and I adorn our masks; he helps me fasten a bow behind my head. He leans in, allowing the warmth of his breath to slide over me.

  “I’m going to kill Cassian for allowing you to buy this dress,” he whispers suddenly. “And then I’m going to punish you for wearing it.” His promise has my stomach flip-flopping at the thought.

  “You don’t own me, Damien.” I turn to smile at him, my mask firmly in place, but I know he can see the confidence in my eyes.

  “We’ll see about that,” he hisses under his breath, but grins as if nothing is wrong. He places his fingers at the base of my spine, causing my skin to tingle at the contact, as we make our way through the entrance into a breathtaking foyer.

  The floors are tiled with patterns better suited for a church. The ceiling is high, with a painting that would make Leonardo Da Vinci jealous. And a chandelier that reminds me of golden champagne flutes hanging above us.

  Everything glitters. But doesn’t the saying go, all that glitters isn’t gold.

  We’re led through the house, out toward a dining hall that has been set up with a table that looks to seat at least twenty people, probably more, but my attention is captured by three young men standing on the patio, just outside the large glass doors.

  Wealth drips from them. The Havens. The girls, who loiter just behind them, are drenched in priceless jewels. The men in expensive tailored suits and the women in designer-cut dresses.

  Style.

  Beauty.

  Money.

  “I think you’re far more beautiful than any female in this place,” Damien whispers, conspiratorially, in my ear. He looks like the epitome of a playboy. Perfectly styled black hair and ice-blue eyes. His charcoal suit fits him like a glove, with a crisp white shirt that doesn’t have a single crease. The tie he’s wearing is a striking blue that matches my dress, and I have a feeling that Cassian had a hand in picking it out.

  “Only the females?” I challenge him with a grin.

  “Don’t get sassy with me,” Damien murmurs, as he pulls two glasses of champagne from a tray. He hands me mine, and then we head toward the rest of the guests, who seem to be milling around; some talking in groups, others in couples.

  “Where are Cass and Finn?” I ask, glancing at Damien, who looks handsome with the silver mask covering half his
face. It reminds me of a Phantom of the Opera mask. He doesn’t look at me. It’s the same way he acted in the car, which has me on alert that something is wrong. One thing about him was that he was always forthcoming in either noticing me or talking to me. But there’s been a shift, and I can’t quite put my finger on what’s going on.

  Music filters from speakers that I can’t see, as couples move toward a makeshift dancefloor in the middle of the garden. They get close, holding onto each other, and for a moment, I wish Damien would ask me to dance, but he’s not even paying attention.

  “Could I ask you for a dance, young lady?” The question comes from one of the guests dressed solely in black, including a mask.

  “She’s with me.”

  “I didn’t think you’d mind, since you don’t seem to be wanting to dance,” the man tells Damien, and the prickly feeling I’m getting from beside me makes me nervous. I don’t think he’ll start a fight, but Damien and I haven’t really been out, unless you count the bonfire.

  “Sure,” I finally respond, much to Damien’s disdain. It flashes in his eyes, but all I do is offer a grin and follow the man onto the dancefloor. We move to the music, and thankfully, he keeps his distance friendly.

  With every turn, my gaze lands on the blue fire that’s burning a hole into the back of my dance partner’s head.

  “He doesn’t like to share. Does he?”

  “Not particularly,” I smile back. “So, are you allowed to tell me who you are? Or is this whole event completely anonymous?”

  “This is your first dance?” When he tips his head to the side, regarding me curiously, a strange shift happens. But before I can figure out what exactly, I’m spun around and find myself in Damien’s arms.

  “She’s dancing with me now,” he tells the man, now behind me. Then he drops his gaze to me. “I told you, you’re mine, you don’t dance with anyone else.”

  “I wanted to dance, he offered. It wasn’t like I was going to drop to my knees on the dancefloor in front of him.” My biting tone causes Damien to chuckle, but his smile doesn’t reach his eyes. It’s the first tell I pick up on. When he grins, when he smirks, his smile always reaches his sparkling gaze; this time, there’s tension in his expression. “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”