A Soul For Chaos (The Soulbearer Trilogy)

by Crista McHugh

  Although her intent was to comfort him, he couldn’t wait for her to remove her hand—and her magic—from him. No one in Ranello would’ve dared touch him without his permission. But here, he had no power, and he wasn’t travelling as a prince normally would. He murmured his thanks to her and took a long drink from his glass.

  “I don’t wish to be rude,” Arden said, still standing, “but I’m exhausted from the journey and wish to retire early.”

  “Of course.” Their hostess spoke quietly to her and pointed up the stairs that led to the level above them.

  Kell rose and followed her. He’d been waiting all day to get her alone, to try and mend the rift between them. He caught her elbow a few steps from the next floor. “May I please have a word with you?”

  Her blue eyes cooled, and she regarded him with the same wariness she had when he was forced to treat her as a prisoner many months ago. “I think you’ve said all you need to say, Kell.”

  “No, I haven’t.” He tightened his fingers around her arm, praying to the Lady Moon that Arden would at least hear what he had to say before running away. “I admit I said some things that hurt you last night, and for that, I apologize.”

  Her expression softened a bit. “Apology accepted.”

  She turned to leave, but he held fast. “Please understand that I’m trying to come to terms with everything—your powers, this place, that thing living inside you—but I’m going to need some time. Please don’t push me away. I love you, Arden, and I want a future with you.”

  There. He’d poured his heart out to her.

  But she was less receptive to it than he’d hoped. Inside of leaning into his arms and letting him hold her once again, she remained still, studying him as through she were trying to solve a riddle. Finally, she stroked his cheek. “I know this must be hard for you.”

  He pressed her palm against his lips. “Am I forgiven?”

  She nodded, her eyes still somber. “But I’m going to need some time to come to terms with everything.”

  He would’ve preferred a slap in the face rather than her throwing his words right back at him. Her fingers slipped away from him, and she continued up the stairs in silence.

  Kell stood in the middle of the stairway, stunned by her response. For a few seconds, hope burned within him that he still had a chance for something special with her. Now, though, he felt cold and empty, alone in this strange land and far away from the woman he loved.

  Cinder bumped past him as he bounded up the stairs after Arden. The door closed, and his hopes of joining her in bed that evening died.

  Kell trudged back down the stairs, his feet stone-heavy, and slumped into the nearest chair. Curse that damn chaos god for ruining everything.

  Sympathy came from the least likely person. Dev sat next to him and offered him a plate of food. He ate his own meal in silence with only the occasional glance up the stairs.

  “How much longer do we have until we get to the Imperial Palace?” Kell asked at last. Perhaps he still had time to make things right before he lost her.

  “We’ll be there tomorrow.”

  The ache in his chest deepened. He pushed his plate away. “And how long will she need to stay here?”

  “Until she completes her training.”

  “And how long will that be?”

  “I wish I could tell you.” Dev pushed the plate back in front of him. “You’d best eat if you want to be able to complete the climb tomorrow.”

  Kell picked at the meat, which had smelled so delicious when they’d arrived. Now, the strange mix of spices reminded him he was far away from home.

  A new web of magic wrapped around him, and he shivered. “What kind of place is this?”

  Dev’s brows furrowed together. “It’s a safe house. The Empire has these scattered throughout the land to offer protection for special travelers.”

  “And let me guess—they are protected by magic.”

  Dev nodded, his brows still drawn together. “You can feel it, can’t you?”

  “You mean the constant shiver coursing down my spine, then yes, I can feel it.”

  “Very interesting.” Dev propped his elbows on the table and rested his chin on his clasped hands, his expression intent. “Tell me, have you ever made something happen that you can’t explain?”

  The hairs on the back of his neck stood up. He didn’t like where this conversation was heading. “What the hell are you talking about?”

  “Just curious,” Dev replied with a nonchalant shrug.

  “If you’re trying to imply that I’ve used magic, then you’re dead wrong. I can’t do the things you and Arden can do.”

  “And yet you use magic every time you draw your sword.”

  Kell’s hand flew to his scabbard. As always, the sword felt warm and comfortable in his hands. There was none of the skin-crawling sensations he’d experience while in Gravaria. “If you’re trying to make a fool of me, you need to try harder.”

  “How did you come by it?”

  Kell paused as the memory washed over him. “I found it in the royal armory. My father said it had been a gift from the Empress and was so unwieldy that it was nothing more than a ceremonial piece. But when I drew it, it seemed to be made for me—the balance, the weight, the grip. I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect sword.”

  Dev nodded. “May I take a look at it?”

  He hesitated, wondering why Dev was so interested in it, but complied.

  The elf studied every inch of it, from the hilt to the tip of the blade. He pointed to the crest etched into the top of the blade. “You see this? It’s the mark of the craftsman who made it.”

  “So?”

  Dev grinned like a man who’d caught his enemy unarmed. “It’s the mark of Foresco, the finest elven swordsmith in Gravaria.”

  “And that means what?” He snatched his sword back and sheathed it, not wanting Dev to discover anything else about the weapon.

  “That you are very lucky to possess one of his creations.” He crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, his gaze focused on the sword. “Foresco imbues all his weapons with certain spells. We already know that it can slice through magical shields.”

  “If you’re thinking about stealing it—”

  Dev silenced him with a one note laugh. “You don’t have to worry about that, especially from me. A knight knows better than to take another man’s weapon, especially one of Foresco’s creations.”

  Kell still kept his fingers wrapped around the hilt. “Is there something in your strange Gravarian knight’s code that is against that?”

  “Is not something similar in your Ranellian knight’s code?” The sarcasm in his voice was lighter than normal and less biting. “If you’ll let me continue, I’ll tell you why I think it’s remarkable that you have that sword.”

  Kell swallowed hard. Did I want to know why? He found his voice and said, “Go on.”

  “Foresco is a seer, a man who has visions of things to come. When he creates a weapon he makes it for only one person. Just one.”

  His palm grew slick while his mouth went dry. “Are you saying he made this sword for me, a man he’d never met?”

  Dev nodded. “He must have had a vision about you as he crafted the weapon, although I have no idea why. But the fact that every other man besides you finds fault in the weapon speaks of Foresco’s intention. When he crafted it, he cast a spell to ensure you would be the only one who used it.”

  Kell’s fingers fell slack, and his arm fell limply to the side. His mind reeled from what Dev had told him. Why me? What had he seen? Dozens of other questions arose that needed answers. “Is this Foresco still alive?”

  “You’ll find his shop in Queembra. Perhaps you can pay him a visit while you’re in town.” Dev’s wry grin told him he’d be a fool to miss this opportunity.

  “I shall consider it.” Once I get up the nerve to face the answers. “Why share this information with me?”

  “Why not? As I told you, I h
ave no use for the sword, but I have a feeling there’s a very good chance you will. Might as well find out now.”

  If they’d been in another world, or maybe if Arden wasn’t involved, Kell might have been good friends with Dev. Maybe there was even still a chance for that here and now. The tension eased from his shoulders. “Thank you for telling me that.”

  “You’re welcome.” He cast another glance up the stairs. “I suppose I should go upstairs and make sure she cast a ward around her room.”

  Jealousy crept in and displaced some of the warm feelings he just had for Dev. “Trying to swoop in and take her for yourself?”

  Dev was halfway out of his chair and froze. His green eyes flared with anger, his lip curling up a hair. “No, I know what my duty is, and I cannot forsake it, especially when she’s being threatened.”

  “And if you weren’t her protector?”

  His face faded into weary lines. “It’s not wise to spend your life wondering what might be. I can only accept what is.”

  As Dev’s steps thudded up the creaky stairs, Kell lingered at the table, pondering the sudden change in the knight. The last sentence echoed over and over again in his mind. I can only accept what is.

  Maybe I need to stop asking myself why Arden has to be cursed with that thing and learn to accept it.

  Then he remembered the way that thing took over Arden’s body—the deep gravelly voice and glowing eyes—and his pulse jumped. Easier said than done.

  More creaking overhead signaled that Dev had moved on to his own room. Their hostess came to his table with a pitcher. “May I offer you something more to drink, welcomed visitor?”

  He shook his head, his stomach still not fully recovered from last night’s bout. “I think I’m going to retire for the evening.”

  “As you wish. You are welcome to any of the rooms upstairs.”

  All but the one room I want to be in.

  He sighed and headed up the stairs. He’d been patient before when it came to Arden. She said she’d forgiven him. Now he just needed to wait for her to take him back. He just hoped she wouldn’t keep him waiting too long.

  Chapter 16

  “Good morning, my dear.” Kell caught Arden’s hand and brought it to his lips.

  She retreated back to her room, wondering how long he’d been standing outside her door. The change in his demeanor made her wary. He seemed too calm, too relaxed, as though he’d forgotten all about Loku. “Good morning, Kell.”

  “May I escort you downstairs?”

  “Aw, look, he’s trying so hard to be a gentleman again. I suspect he’s hornier than ever and wanting back in your good graces.”

  “Why must you always be so crass?”

  “Because I know how humans are.”

  But despite Loku’s accusations, she rested the tips of her fingers on his arm and walked down the stairs with him.

  Dev sat at the table, his plate nearly empty. His eyes tracked their progress toward him, his mouth pressed into a thin line. “We have a tough morning ahead of us, but after today, we’ll get some much deserved rest.”

  She took the seat across from him. “I thought the Empress wanted to see me immediately.”

  “She does. We’ll be dining with her tonight.” Dev dipped a piece of flat bread in the last remnants of orange sauce that covered his eggs and ate as though nothing was amiss.

  Arden’s blood chilled. She’d spent most of yesterday working on her shields, but now she feared it wouldn’t be enough. “What does she want with me?”

  “Empress Marist wants to meet all the Soulbearers.”

  “So she can rape your mind and then lock you up in mithral chains.”

  She rolled her eyes. “I seriously doubt she’s as wicked as you imply.”

  “Which one of us has more experience with Her Imperial Iciness?”

  Kell picked at his plate beside her. “I was up late thinking about what I’d say to her, and I think I have a good foundation in place to open the discussion. Thank you for your advice, Dev.”

  Arden chewed her bottom lip and studied both Dev and Kell. “Since when are you two friends?”

  “We’re not,” Dev answered as he got up from the table. “But I thought it wise to offer the prince a few words of advice when it came to the Empress. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll see to our horses.”

  “Dev needs to learn to be a better liar. He’s gotten rusty since he swore off gambling.”

  Why does all my information about Dev’s past come from a disembodied chaos god? She shoved a few bites of the spicy eggs into her mouth and decided to stop when her eyes began watering. She tossed the rest to Cinder. “I miss the food back home.”

  “You and me both. What I wouldn’t give for a nice slice of roasted pork bathed in cinnamon and apples.”

  She licked her lips, almost tasting the meal he described. “Or even just warm honey bread fresh out of the oven, smeared with raspberry jam.”

  “Stop it—you’re making me homesick.”

  Although Kell laughed as he said it, something in his voice pulled at her. It had been over a month since they’d seen home, and the novelty of Gravaria was fast losing its appeal. “We’ll be back home before winter.”

  “You sound so certain.”

  “I refuse to stay here any longer than that.”

  Kell squeezed her hand. “And what of this training they keep telling us you need?”

  “I’ll just train extra hard.” She squeezed his hand back. “We need to get you home as soon as possible.”

  “I’m not leaving without you.”

  And just like that, he managed to reopen the fresh wounds in her heart. “Kell, please—”

  He released her hand. “I know—you need some time. It’s not like I haven’t been there before.”

  She almost told him that her feelings for him were not as intense as his and he needed to move on to someone new, but she managed to catch herself in time. There was no reason to break his heart when she still wasn’t sure how she felt about him. “But this time it’s different. It’s not me that needs to come around.”

  “You’re a coward,” Loku hissed as she got up from the table and went toward the front door.

  “No, I’m not. I’m making sure I don’t lose a good friend and lover.”

  “We both know he’s not the man for you. Settling for him will only bring both of you more pain.”

  “When I want your advice on my love life, I’ll ask for it. Until then, shut up.”

  The morning sun caught the red in Dev’s hair and made it burn like fire. She stopped and watched the graceful way he saddled the horses, the way his lean muscles flexed under the weight of their gear. When he caught her with his intense green eyes, her breath refused to leave her lungs. She’d always considered Dev attractive, but something about him this morning awoke the desires she’d tried to ignore since he told her months ago there could be nothing between them.

  At last, she managed to clear both her mind and her lungs. “Why are you being so helpful to Kell?”

  “Just because I don’t particularly care about his intentions toward you doesn’t mean I don’t respect his intentions as a prince. He has a chance to change things back in Ranello, and I want to make sure he succeeds.”

  “Why?”

  Dev stopped tightening the strap around the horse’s stomach. “Maybe because I want to make sure it will be safe for you to return home someday.”

  She placed her hand on his arm. The warmth of his skin permeated through the fabric of his shirt and wound its way up along her hand, past her wrist and elbow, and into her chest. The rest of her body longed to touch him, to feel the strange reaction her arm enjoyed. She longed to press her lips against his, to see if it further ignited the fire burning within her. She inched closer to him, her gaze locked with his. “Thank you.”

  His pupils widened, and his breath quickened.

  Her pulse jumped as she watched him. Could he be experiencing the same thing I am?
r />   “You’re welcome,” he replied in a gravelly voice and then removed her hand.

  The heat fled her veins, leaving a teeth-grinding chill in its wake. Every time she thought Dev felt something for her, that she was closer to solving the riddle of him, he always managed to pull away and leave her more frustrated than ever. Just once, she’d like for him to forget his duty so she could know his true feelings for her.

  Kell came out from the safe house. “Are we ready to go?”

  Dev finished cinching the saddle to the last horse. “Ready when you are. I’ll take the lead with Arden riding between us.”

  The morning dragged along as the horses navigated the treacherous series of switchbacks climbing up the cliff. The soft rock may have been accommodating for the rooms carved out of it, but it made for a fragile road. Arden offered a silent prayer to the Lady Moon that they’d make it all the way to the top without it crumbling out from underneath them.

  At last, they came to a thick wall that stretched around the edge of the cliff. A massive gate with bronze panels stood in front of them. She barely had time to glance at the images embossed on the metal before the doors opened. “What is this?”

  “The entrance to Queembra,” Dev replied and urged his horse forward.

  A new world unfolded as they passed the gates—one of stark white buildings shining in the sun, flat roofed homes with trees growing on them, and baskets of flowers spilling out from every window sill. Although the roads were wide enough for the three of them to ride side by side, the height of the buildings and their vegetation kept them in the cool shade. By contrast, the streets of Trivinus appeared dark, dingy and crowded.

  Kell’s gaze turned from side to side, taking it all in. “I never imagined such a magnificent city. I must build something like this when I return to Ranello.”

  Dev laughed. “You haven’t seen the Imperial Palace yet. By the time you leave, you’ll understand why I called your kingdom primitive.”

  Arden already understood why. Every few blocks, the road offered her a glimpse of small squares tucked away along the side streets. The people gathered around the gurgling fountains in the centers, filling their pots with the day’s water and chatting with their neighbors. Everything felt safe and serene here.