Forever Is True

by Novoneel Chakraborty

  It took Prisha a few minutes before she could coax Gauri into give Diggy’s parents’ number to her. Saveer saved the number on his phone and went inside.

  Prisha and Gauri were allowed to see the body but only for a few minutes. It was then sent for postmortem and a forensic examination. His family was informed by the police. They were on their way from Indore.

  While the two girls went home, totally distressed, Saveer went to the police station to check the CCTV footage of outside his house. Around 3.31 a.m., a hatchback car was seen stopping right outside Saveer’s house. It had a car-cover except on the left side, from where the body was pushed out. Neither the model nor the number plate of the car was visible.

  ‘Why your house, Mr Rathod?’ asked the officer in charge, Vijay Shetty.

  ‘I don’t have any idea,’ Saveer said. His lawyer, M.K. Kumaraswamy, had joined him at the police station.

  ‘It could be a coincidence. I don’t think my client is linked to the case at all. Just that the deceased’s flatmate is his girlfriend. That can’t be the reason for interrogating him.’

  ‘I was only asking a simple question,’ Shetty clarified, maintaining his poise. ‘It isn’t an interrogation. I’ve known Mr Rathod for a long time. He has been doing a really good job with G-Punch.’

  ‘It’s okay,’ Saveer told Kumaraswamy. The word ‘coincidence’ brought back flashes of the deaths in his family. He hoped that it wasn’t what was going on in his mind. The police and the lawyer may not be able to figure out the link but it seemed like a direct message to him.

  Who is this goddamn person? Saveer clenched his fist in frustration. With a lot of effort, he calmed himself down and turned to Shetty. ‘I’ll have to leave,’ he said.

  ‘Certainly.’

  ‘Please keep me updated on this. My girlfriend and Diggy were very close. And at any point if you have a query, please feel free to contact me.’

  ‘Of course, I will. Thank you, Mr Rathod.’

  Saveer and Kumaraswamy left the police station. Once outside, Saveer called up Prisha. She was still at home with Gauri. Saveer drove to her place. While driving, he kept trying to convince himself that he had done the right thing by not telling the police about the strange sequence of events ever since he had started dating Prisha, or for that matter since he was ten years old. What if the person tries to commit another heinous crime like this, that is if he has really killed Diggy? But rape? It was something even Saveer couldn’t digest.

  The girls had cried their eyes out by the time Saveer reached. The door was open. He sat down beside them in the living room. He didn’t know how to initiate a conversation. He had lost many loved ones, so he knew that at such a time one has a lot to say but also want to stay quiet. It is a difficult situation when one part of you is in denial and the other has accepted the harsh truth. After a few minutes, Gauri said, ‘Prisha said Diggy was raped. Is that true?’

  ‘Initial investigation suggests so. But there were no traces of semen.’

  ‘There won’t be any. It’s a woman who raped Diggy!’ Gauri said. Saveer looked at her incredulously and then at Prisha. The latter nodded.

  ‘How do you know?’

  ‘Diggy was going mad about this woman who was apparently amazingly beautiful,’ Prisha said, ‘In fact, he was behaving stupidly of late because of her. He was so smitten.’

  ‘Who is this woman? Where does she live? Do you guys have her number?’

  Both Gauri and Prisha looked at him blankly.

  ‘Nothing at all?’

  ‘Maybe we can get it from his phone?’ Prisha said.

  ‘The police haven’t found his phone yet. The number is switched off,’ Saveer said, sounding thoughtful. A few seconds passed.

  ‘Are you thinking what I am thinking?’ Prisha asked Saveer and they looked at each other intently.

  ‘But the motive?’ Saveer asked.

  ‘Us? He wants to tell us that if we don’t stop, he will toy with us like this. By killing the people we love.’

  ‘What are you guys talking about?’ Gauri looked at both of them, alarmed.

  ‘Didn’t you tell her?’ Saveer asked.

  ‘Tell me what!’

  Prisha sighed. Gauri only knew about her being pushed off at Nandi Hills, nothing else. She took a few seconds to brace herself. The shock of Diggy’s death was still riding heavily on her. Once she felt a little in control, Prisha told her what had happened at Nandi Hills on Saveer’s birthday—that there was someone out there who had killed everyone who had come close to Saveer. And that Prisha was the only one who had survived the attempt made on her life.

  ‘I don’t believe this!’ Gauri sounded shocked.

  ‘It is a bit outlandish but is true nevertheless,’ Prisha said. She went on to tell her about her encounters, and also those of Zinnia’s, about the man with a voice similar to that of Saveer’s. In all probability, he was perhaps the murderer, who had used the alias of a woman.

  ‘But Diggy said she was a woman. He wasn’t stupid to have mistaken a man for a woman!’ Gauri exclaimed.

  ‘That’s why I doubt if it’s a him. But then, why would a woman rape Diggy? Is such a thing even possible?’ Prisha said.

  ‘It is a him. I know this because leaving the body right in front of my house couldn’t have been a coincidence. It simply couldn’t. Saveer grew agitated.

  ‘All our doubts will be cleared once the person is caught,’ Prisha said.

  ‘What I want to know is: did you know all along that people who come close to you, die?’ Gauri asked Saveer. She looked him in the eye, not giving him an opportunity to duck the question.

  ‘Yes, I did.’

  ‘Then why didn’t you tell Prisha about it! What if she had died after falling off the cliff at Nandi Hills? Who would have been blamed?’

  My weak and selfish self didn’t let me confess, Saveer thought but didn’t say anything.

  ‘Gauri, it’s okay,’ Prisha said.

  ‘I’m sorry but this is not okay! I would have lost you because of him. I have lost Diggy because of him. He has no right to destroy us like this. So what if he loves you?’ the pitch of her voice was rising every second.

  ‘Gauri, shut up!’ Prisha sensed that the discussion was on the verge of becoming an argument.

  ‘He should explain. Or just butt off from your life. If it really is the person who has been killing all his loved ones, then he will kill me too one day. Will you be okay then as well?’ This time it was Prisha’s turn to answer.

  ‘I’m sorry, Saveer. She isn’t in her senses.’

  ‘I’m perfectly in my senses. Mr Saveer Rathod, could you care to explain what your plan of action is regarding this, apart from just waiting and watching us getting killed? And who knows, raped as well?’

  ‘Gauri!’ Prisha almost screamed.

  Saveer stood up.

  ‘I’ll call you soon.’ He left.

  Saveer didn’t call Prisha that night. Nor did he take her calls. She called him a few times, after which he messaged her saying he was busy with some office project. Prisha understood that Gauri’s words had not gone down well with him. But she couldn’t even blame her. Gauri was right. It was just that Prisha didn’t have a solution. Nor did Saveer.

  Diggy’s parents reached Bengaluru the next day. By then, Gauri had told Prisha what Diggy never had—the love of his family. His parents had always shunned him because of his condition. They had sponsored his education in a residential school and later in a college, but maintained their distance. Prisha couldn’t digest the fact.

  ‘A lot of shit goes on in this world. And we keep our eyes closed for far too many of them,’ Gauri said.

  Diggy had an elder brother and a younger sister. They didn’t come. His parents stayed at a hotel and came to collect Diggy’s belongings. They cried but Prisha could tell it was hogwash.

  Even when Diggy’s body was released to be cremated, they didn’t bother taking it back to Indore. They simply cremated it in Bengaluru. Pr
isha and Gauri joined them. As his body was carried away, Prisha understood what her parents must have gone through when she was in the hospital. And then a disturbing thought struck her. What if Gauri was killed next?

  Prisha knew that Saveer was right when he had said that leaving the body in front of his house was no coincidence. The statement that the person playing this dirty game was making was also clear: If you two don’t break up, then more people will die.

  Diggy’s parents left for the airport with their son’s ashes. They asked the girls to keep the two-wheeler with them. Prisha and Gauri rode back to their apartment with heavy hearts. Neither of them had attended college since Diggy’s death.

  ‘Isn’t it possible that Diggy was raped by someone else after he met the woman?’ Prisha asked as they were riding back home.

  ‘Are you saying it’s a random rape? In India, guys don’t get so randomly raped on the streets at night. Especially, in a metropolis like Bengaluru,’ Gauri slowed down a bit.

  ‘I am not saying that. What if the woman Diggy was so suddenly crazy about has nothing to do with it? Maybe the person who attacked me at Nandi Hills is behind the murder.’

  ‘You mean that person is gay? Like he is obsessed with Saveer and hence kills anyone who loves him or the ones he loves?’

  ‘But then he could have simply killed Diggy, why rape and kill him?’ Prisha sounded as if she was asking herself the question.

  ‘Don’t mind my saying this, Prisha, but do you really think Saveer is worth all this? More than your life? You have your parents, your sister, me. You were pushed off a bloody hill for fuck sake! Your parents don’t know that else they would have never allowed you to stay back in Bengaluru.’

  Prisha knew that she was right.

  ‘I would not only suggest but also request you to call it quits with Saveer, however distressing it may be. I don’t know what you were thinking when you went back to him after nearly dying,’ Gauri said.

  What was I thinking? Prisha wondered. She had only one thing in mind—she loved Saveer. Saveer loved her back. And she was confident that when two people loved each other genuinely then a lot of shit can be taken care of. But . . . What if people start dying?

  Prisha placed her head on Gauri’s shoulder, hoping some magic would happen and her love story with Saveer wouldn’t be compromised. Both of them remained quiet even after they reached their flat. Diggy’s room was empty. His laptop had been missing since his death. Gauri logged in to Facebook on her phone and started going through Diggy’s pictures. Prisha simply lay on the bed, trying to think through everything. It was around nine in the night when her phone rang, flashing Saveer’s name. It had been a few days since they had spoken, communicating only through texts. Prisha took the call immediately.

  ‘Hi!’

  ‘Hi, Prisha. I’m sorry but I’ll need some time of yours. Are you free?’

  He sounded unnaturally formal.

  ‘Yes, but what has happened?’ Prisha’s voice sounded brittle.

  ‘I’m coming over to your place in some time. Let’s go for a drive. We need to talk.’

  Prisha had a bad feeling about it.

  18

  Prisha stood at the window, looking out for Saveer’s car. She had an inkling of what Saveer might say but she wasn’t ready to accept it. She kept telling herself it was something related to Diggy’s death. Maybe some clue had emerged? Her heart skipped a beat when she saw his car screech to a halt near her apartment gate. Her phone rang.

  ‘Yeah, I’m coming down in a minute,’ she said. She took a deep breath and thought: please god, let this not be what I think it is going to be.

  Gauri had fallen asleep, so Prisha locked the door from outside and went downstairs. Saveer greeted her coldly, which made her more nervous. She sank into her seat and put the seat belt on as Saveer drove out of the lane.

  It was late in the night and the roads were mostly empty.

  ‘What is it, Saveer? I can’t bear the silence any more,’ Prisha said.

  ‘When I had first felt something for you, I had fought hard but failed to follow my instinct to not get involved with you. I failed to listen to my instinct even after you were released from the hospital. I shouldn’t have continued but . . .’

  ‘But you did.’

  ‘Yes. I did. Hoping against hope that things would stay normal.’

  Changing the gear, he took a turn rather abruptly. Prisha gripped her seat to steady herself.

  ‘But finally, I have accepted it. It can’t be normal. I can never be in a relationship. Gauri was right. When I know what the consequences are, I don’t have the right to involve myself with anyone. After all, I’m risking another person’s life. In the last twenty-five years, there has been no attempt made on my life.’

  ‘And yet you have died every day in those last twenty-five years.’

  ‘Yes, I have.’ Saveer stopped the car. Prisha didn’t know where exactly they were. There was so much on her mind that she had lost track of the turns that he had taken.

  ‘I’m ready to die, but I can’t take any more deaths on my conscience,’ Saveer said, switching on the parking lights and getting out of the car. It was drizzling. Prisha followed him outside. They stood on either side of the car.

  Don’t you understand, Saveer? Till now, you may have died every day because of all those deaths but from now onwards, if we call it quits, we will both die every day? Prisha thought. I know, if we continue there is a possibility that my dear ones too can die but is that reason enough to separate and kill each other like no death ever will? Destroy each other like no life ever will? Prisha looked up helplessly at the cloudy sky.

  Saveer was staring at the blinking lights of a passing airplane. It was playing hide and seek with the clouds. Just like his mind was playing with his heart. I know it’s difficult for you, Prisha. It is the same with me. Certain relationships alter you when you are in it. And once they break, that alteration seems like a fairy tale. And because it seems like a fairy tale, you stop believing in the feasibility of it. You turn into the worst version of yourself. I may treasure the alteration, but I won’t ever go close to it again. And whoever makes me feel close to it, I will shun that person as well. I know this because I have gone through it after Ishanvi’s death. But how do I explain it to you without coming across as someone who is done with this relationship. I swear I am not done.

  Prisha folded her hands and looking down at the wet tarmac. You’d told me once about Complete Love. You made me experience it as well. And now you want to make me understand what the loss of love is. It may be just a break-up for the rest of the world, but for me it will be a loss. The pain will be far more acute than the pain of a break-up. She tried hard not to break down, but couldn’t.

  Saveer glanced at her and realized that she was crying. He sighed and walked up to her. It’s all my fault, I know, he thought, standing against the car, beside her. If involving myself with you was a mistake to begin with, then reconnecting with you after you were released from the hospital was a blunder. Between you and I, I’m the mature one. I should have acted like one. It’s not surprising where it has led us to. What is surprising is how I allowed it to reach so far, despite knowing every damn thing. Once you give in to love, I tell you, it can toy with all your maturity, mental and emotional poise and your decision-making ability. Saveer moved a bit. Their hands brushed accidentally. Prisha looked up at him expectantly. Hot tears rolled down her cheeks. He braced himself; if he broke down, Saveer knew he wouldn’t be able to steer the situation in the direction he wanted to.

  ‘We may stand here for the rest of the night but it’s not going to change anything, Prisha,’ he said. Saveer knew there was no pleasant way of putting across to her what he was there for.

  ‘This is it?’ Prisha asked, almost in a whisper.

  ‘I’m afraid, it is. We have to break up before anybody else is attacked.’

  ‘What if I say I’m not ready for this? I never will be.’

  �
�Trust me, we both won’t ever be ready for this. We have to do this first and then allow time to prepare us for it.’

  ‘And what if time isn’t able to prepare us for it? Prepare me for it? What am I supposed to do then?’

  ‘You are very young now. As you grow up, you’ll understand what you’re supposed to do about it.’

  ‘You are a grown-up. You already know, isn’t it?’

  ‘Yeah,’ Saveer said and thought, who am I kidding?

  ‘Then, tell me. I also want to know.’

  Saveer closed his eyes and placed his hands on his hips. He was losing grip on the conversation.

  ‘Look, Prisha, you can continue asking questions and I will continue answering them. You don’t want this to end and I . . .’

  ‘You want this to end, Saveer?’

  ‘I don’t want this to end but I will have to end it. There’s a difference. So let’s just do it. We aren’t meeting from tomorrow onwards. Neither in office nor outside. Please don’t make it more difficult.’

  ‘It already is more than difficult.’

  ‘Come, let me drop you home.’

  One last time, Prisha thought and said, ‘Saveer, wait.’

  He turned around to look at her.

  ‘I want to hug you,’ Prisha said. One last time.

  Saveer came back to her. He was cautious not to make her feel that he was equally vulnerable. Prisha hugged him, placing her ear against his chest. She could hear his heartbeat race a tad bit faster. She closed her eyes and tried to consume the moment. The way she hugged him tighter with every passing second triggered an emotional chaos in Saveer. But before the chaos could bewitch him and provoke him into exposing his helpless self, Saveer broke the hug. They got into the car. No words were exchanged. He dropped her home and left.

  When Prisha reached home, she noticed that Gauri was drunk. She had been drinking Old Monk on her own while re-living old memories with Diggy on Facebook.

  ‘Join in,’ she said.

  ‘Saveer and I broke up,’ Prisha said.

  ‘If you had done it before then who knows, perhaps Diggy would have been alive today.’