Aftermath

by Joanne Clancy

  Eventually, the evening came to an end and Niall walked her to a taxi which would take her home. She got into the cab and sat down and Niall looked through the open window to say goodbye. Hope looked into his eyes. The entire evening she'd been looking into his eyes. She couldn't find an end to them. When the cab drove off, his eyes stayed with her. It was like he was in front of her all the time. She was shaking and her eyes filled with tears. What was happening? The energy between them was so electric and they hadn't even done anything. She had never experienced anything like this before. I have to see him again, she thought. I have to see him soon.

  When she woke up the following morning, he was her first thought. She decided to call him. It was tiresome playing hard to get. She wanted to tell him how she felt about him and hoped he felt the same. Less than an hour later she heard the roar of his motorbike. She was trembling with joy and could hardly contain herself. They went to a nearby cafe, sat next to each other and drank cappucinos. She was looking into his eyes, being completely hypnotised. At one point she reached over and took his hand in her own. “You are such a wonderful man. I am so happy we met.”

  Later, Niall told her that it was then that he realised that she felt the same about him as he felt about her. How funny; they both thought the other wasn't interested. They finished their drinks and said goodbye. Hope was flying to see her mother in South Africa that afternoon and she'd wanted to see Niall before she left. She went back to her apartment to pack. Her feelings were a lot different than they had been the previous night. Now she knew for sure that he felt the same way about her. Last night she had been heartbroken but today her heart was bursting with joy.

  Hope couldn't stop thinking about Niall. Her days were spent going through her photo albums, reliving the many happy memories that they'd shared. She'd never forget meeting Niall at the airport when she returned home from visiting her mother in South Africa.

  “Would you like to meet me at the airport?” she'd telephoned him before boarding her flight.

  “Would I?” he asked. She could hear the beaming smile in his voice. “I'll pick you up on the bike.”

  Hope remembered the butterflies she had in her stomach during the entire flight. The second the plane landed she went to the bathroom to freshen up. She wanted to look her best for Niall.

  How many times had she been to Cork airport? So many times that she couldn't even count them. There are three separate terminal buildings, and this time, this most important of times, she got mixed up and told Niall the wrong terminal! Eventually, realising her mistake, she called him on his mobile and redirected him. When she approached the exit, she saw him outside standing beside his motorbike.

  What do we do? Do we just say hello? Do we hug? Do we kiss? She was overcome with nerves.

  The sun was shining brightly as she walked through the doors and reached him.

  “Hello,” she smiled shyly, kissing him on the cheek. “Thank you for coming to get me.”

  Then she got on the back of his bike and they flew down the road together. She wrapped her arms tight around him, pulling her body as close to him as possible and rested her head on his strong shoulder. The energy floating between them was overwhelming. She couldn't think. Her head was full of the sound of the motorbike and her arms were full of the sweetness and strength of Niall. She never wanted to let him go and wished they could stay like that, lost in that precious moment, forever.

  Even at that early stage in their relationship Niall had to travel a lot on business so they didn't get to spend much time together. She was completely infatuated and besotted with him and longed to hear from him. His first business trip away from her lasted a month and during that time she was hysterically crying and laughing. She was overcome with emotions. She cried over the phone. It was impossible to control the way she felt about him. She had never felt anything like it before and was helpless before their amazing passion. Niall made her laugh. It was the funniest thing; she was crying and laughing. The vain part of her couldn't help thinking how all her laughing and crying was going to make her look in front of the camera. Her emotions were wild; high, low, high, low, everything was so intense. It was like being on a roller-coaster!

  Niall texted her non-stop and she couldn't wait to receive his messages. She kept escaping from the set and rushing to the ladies' room to see what he had sent and to text him back. She had saved those first texts and still treasured them. They gave her hope in the dark days after the tsunami.

  I'm acting like a teenager. My feelings are so intense. I'm under your magical spell. My heart is full of love for you. You are making me jump so high, so very, very high. I feel like I'm on a trampoline of love.

  His texts were full of his wonderful intelligence, thoughtfulness and humour. Hope loved learning about him; about his personality, his passion, his life. He made her a huge scrapbook during their first year together which he filled with clippings about her television shows, diary entries of their special moments, copies of her texts to him, photographs and drawings. Niall was a gifted artist and cartoonist as well as being clever with words. She was so grateful that he had taken the time to make the scrapbook for her. It was all she had left of him now.

  She was full of energy and passion on set, even more so than usual. Work was hard; long hours, early starts and late nights, yet she was happy and excited and madly in love. Her head was all over the place and her colleagues looked at her like she was a crazy woman. She was a crazy woman, but she didn't care! At first, she didn't tell the team about Niall, but soon she couldn't keep it a secret any longer. Anyway, she had to tell them because she was afraid they would think she was going mental! Once she'd told her work colleagues she had to tell everyone. Soon she was calling her friends and asking their advice.

  “What should I do? I'm so in love. What do I do?” she’d ask them.

  They were worried about her, knowing her obsessive and addictive nature. They didn't want her to be let down and fall into the darkness which she'd fought so hard to escape. Everyone was giving her the same advice. “You're overworked and exhausted. You need rest, time alone. It's been too much on you with work and so many emotions. Don't make any decisions now. Go to a spa for a few days. Clear your mind and then you'll have a better perspective about Niall.”

  She so desperately wanted to see Niall and he wanted to see her too. He kept urging her to fly out to be with him but her friends advised her not to go so fast, not to join him until she’d done some thinking on her own.

  I wish we weren't so far apart. I can't wait to fall into your arms. I want to look into the deepest blue oceans, feel your energy and feel your tender kisses on my skin. XXX

  She'd decided to take her friends' advice and have some well-deserved time off to relax and clear her mind. She researched spas all over the world but somehow she couldn't find the right one. Actually, she couldn't find the right spa anywhere in the world except for England, where Niall was working on business.

  “Don't worry,” she told her friends. “I'm taking your advice and going to a spa.”

  Of course, she neglected to mention where exactly.

  It was early in the morning when she arrived at The Sanctuary Spa in Sussex and she immediately texted Niall. He called her back within minutes.

  “Guess where I am?” she teased him.

  “I don't know, at the studio in Cork?”

  “Nope, I'm in Sussex, just down the road from you at The Sanctuary Spa. Would you like to join me for dinner?”

  “Of course, I'll cancel my appointments and get there as soon as I can.” She knew he was smiling. Later, he told her that his heart was beating out of his chest on the drive to meet her again.

  When Niall accepted her dinner invitation, she was very happy. It meant there was a continuation, a real continuation. Yes, they had that magical first kiss, but the realistic part of Hope knew that she couldn't let everything hinge on a kiss, no matter how incredible it may have been. Being together again would be the confirmation o
f their kiss and a reaffirmation of their feelings.

  So began the most amazing week of her life. They didn't plan anything, everything was gloriously spontaneous. They were staying in a beautiful bedroom with a four-poster bed and a little balcony which overlooked the gardens. It reminded Hope of the scene from Romeo and Juliet.

  She was out of her room in a heartbeat and running down the stairs as soon as she saw Niall jump out of the taxi. They hugged and kissed, cherishing the warmth of each other's embrace.

  They made dinner reservations at the hotel but Hope couldn't eat anything. She filled herself with his presence. She was so happy and so drawn to him. He was happy too, but a little cautious at the same time. They sat next to each other, and she was trying to hold his hands. She was a very tactile person and loved to touch people. At one point, much to his embarrassment, she sat on his lap.

  “I can't help myself,” she laughed. “You're just irresistible.” She wasn't doing anything naughty; she only wanted to be near him.

  After dinner, they returned to their room and lay down on the huge bed. They lay next to each other, side by side but nothing happened. They held hands and there was such a magical energy all around them, like nothing she had ever experienced. It felt so right between them, like they'd known each other forever. There was no awkwardness, no tension, only a comfortable, easy, peaceful feeling.

  They stayed at The Sanctuary for a week and each day felt as if they'd known each other all their lives. It was lovely to explore each other and learn about each other. Hope discovered that Niall wore contact lenses; clear ones, since nothing was needed to enhance the colour of his eyes. One morning she walked into the room and he was lying on the bed wearing glasses, reading. She loved it and said he looked even sexier wearing glasses. He told her she was crazy.

  They took massages and treatments during the day and walked around the grounds, enjoying the perfectly landscaped gardens. Most of the other guests were older than them and everybody was smiling at them like people do when they see a young couple in love.

  Even though they felt such a special connection to each other, nothing intimate happened between them until the last night. Hope was tired of waiting. She could not resist the powerful attraction she felt to him and on their final night they took their love to the next level.

  The next morning Hope had to return to Ireland to start filming her latest presenting job. Niall had laughed when she'd told him she'd be chasing unsuspecting singletons all over Ireland and trying to set them up on dates. He had to stay on in England to finalise some business, but he promised to meet her as soon as he returned to Cork.

  He waved her off in a taxi back to the airport and just as he was fading out of sight the words “I’d die for you” of Bryan Adams’ song “Everything I do” came on the radio. A strange feeling of dread gripped her heart and she remembered praying, please God, don't let this be some sort of message. I can't lose him.

  It was her first morning back in her apartment and she was awakened by someone loudly ringing her doorbell. It was a messenger. Who could be sending something so early? She swung open the door and was presented with the most beautiful bouquet of yellow roses. They looked like sunshine flowers and she couldn't help smiling. Niall loved her apartment. He said he was more at home there than anywhere else in the world.

  “That's because I'm spreading love all over, painting love on the walls,” she laughingly explained.

  Hope had a small garden behind her apartment and they'd sit out there together talking for hours. He told her about his childhood and she told him about hers. She described the mountains and the forest behind her grandparents' house and the loving way in which they took care of her. They never ran out of things to talk about; from their backgrounds to their beliefs, their conversations covered everything. They had so much in common, more than they'd ever realised.

  Niall was an outstanding chef; a master of cooking. His specialty was the traditional Irish Sunday dinner of roast meat with roast vegetables. He introduced Hope to creamy mashed potatoes with his essential secret ingredient mixed in. His potatoes were to die for and Hope made all sorts of yummy noises when she ate them! The taste was beyond scrumptious. Niall often teased her that she loved his cooking, not him and that was the real reason she stayed with him.

  Hope loved Niall's spontaneity.

  “Why don't we go to Paris?” he suggested one lazy Saturday morning when they were lounging around, watching television and reading the newspapers.

  Hope looked at him in surprise and then her face broke into a beaming smile. “Why not?” she agreed, with a nonchalant shrug.

  An hour later and they were at Cork airport getting ready to board a flight to Paris! They checked into the Hotel Saint Germain in the Latin Quarter and spent the next few days taking in the sights. Niall hired a car, a luxurious Audi convertible, and they drove all over the city. They explored the Etoile, the Champs Elysees and onto the grand boulevards of the Left Bank. They enjoyed leisurely lunches in the little cafes which clustered the footpaths and at night they went for peaceful strolls along the avenues. One evening, they went dancing together at a club in the First District. Niall was quite shy about dancing and left most of the moves to Hope.

  Hope suggested they drive to Normandy. She wanted to see Etretat which is famous for having a massive rock in the ocean with a large hole in the middle. Many artists, such as Monet had painted it. They left their hotel and drove west toward the Channel. The trip was spent listening to music at full blast on the stereo system. When the car's satellite navigation system broke down they tried to read the maps but they failed miserably and soon were hopelessly lost. They had planned to have a romantic picnic along the way but they couldn't find a place they liked. It was late at night when their hunger pains finally forced them to stop and they pulled up beside a small cemetery and ate their picnic overlooking the tombstones. Etretat was as fascinating as Hope had imagined. The rock was breathtaking and Hope was excited to share her first view of it with Niall.

  Looking back, it seemed to Hope that without even realising it, they'd always been on a race against time. She was dashing off to her latest television gig and he had another endless business meeting somewhere. She treasured those three days in Paris with him. Those days were even more precious than she’d realised; in a few short years he would be gone.

  Hope never believed that she would ever meet anyone as special as Niall. It was like a dream come true. He made the impossible seem possible and every minute she spent with him was like living in paradise. She felt very lucky and blessed that their paths had grown together and when they were apart she missed his smile, his touch and every bit of him. Hope felt like she was living in the clouds during those early, heady months of their relationship. Niall told her he felt the same way too. He was so very tender and loving.

  “What's the most special day to you about our relationship?” he asked her once.

  “The night we first made love,” she answered, without hesitation. “That night signalled the true beginning of our romantic journey for me. What's yours?”

  “Our first kiss,” he smiled shyly. He was sentimental and not afraid to show his feelings, like no man she had ever known. It was wonderful that they had two different special dates in their hearts; this gave them two memories to celebrate.

  Niall knew that Hope was nervous about getting married. The fiasco of her first marriage had scarred her and she wanted to be completely certain before she even contemplated marrying again. Instead, he jokingly talked about making a contract with her.

  “How about twenty years?” she teased.

  “Only twenty years?” he asked. “So, when I'm old and with ugly, twisted hands you will disappear and leave me. If we make a contract, it is forever; that's my deal.”

  Niall had a silly complex about his hands. When he was a small child, maybe five or six years old, he’d fallen off his bike and broken his fingers and now they were ever so slightly crooked, hardly noticeable.
His friends and family teased him mercilessly about them but Hope loved his hands.

  A few weeks before Niall's memorable proposal, they were on holidays in Portugal. Niall had surprised her with an unforgettable trip to the beautiful five star, luxury collection Sheraton Algarve Hotel. The hotel was located right on the sea front on a breathtaking stretch of white sandy beach, surrounded by palm trees. Niall had rented one of the hotel's bungalows for them which had shuttered windows overlooking the ocean. The views were spectacular. Their first night they stayed in the bungalow, just happy to be in paradise together.

  They spent the next day playing on the beach and sunbathing. Later that evening they went to the scuba diving centre where Niall had booked three days aboard a boat. After scrambling across several boats they eventually reached theirs. Hope was nervous about climbing from deck to deck in the dark, but holding Niall's hand made her feel safe. Once they got on the boat they had to remove their shoes and their shoes stayed off for the entire three days. Hope loved it; if she could she would stay barefoot all the time.

  Their accommodation on board was sparse to say the least. Their living quarters consisted of a tiny cabin with bunk beds. They stayed on the bottom bunk, their bodies tucked tightly around one another.

  The other divers were a mixed group; English, Irish, French and Australian. There were about twenty people on board including the crew. Every morning there was an on-deck briefing, to go over the dive site, the currents, the rocks, depth and so on. Then they'd suit up, get their oxygen tanks and jump over the side. There were three dives a day. Hope was with Niall every time he prepared for a dive, and she was waiting for him when he returned. She would have joined him but her sinuses were playing up so she thought it best not. When Niall was in the water, she read, sunbathed or chatted with the crew. Niall was so happy; he absolutely adored scuba diving. His good humour was infectious and his high spirits and silly jokes made everyone else happy too. It was sheer bliss and a real treat to leave their hectic lives behind for a while and just take time to enjoy each other.