Tilly and the Crazy Eights

by Monique Gray Smith

  Tilly found a heart-shaped rose quartz for Piper and a beautiful piece of hematite for Mick’s office desk, but her greatest find was a necklace for herself. It was made of mala beads and had a rose quartz hanging at the end. The write-up beside it said, “When worn, it promotes self-love.” Perfect, she thought to herself, just what I need. She slipped it over her head and took the tag and her gifts up to the till. On her way out, Tilly noticed Rob browsing the book section. She paused, unconsciously brushing her bangs out of her eyes and considered, Do I? But before she could decide, Rob turned around and his face lit up. “Hey, I was hoping I’d run into you again!”

  Tilly looked away for a moment, trying to act aloof. She’d been so involved with herself on the tour that there had been very little interaction between them, but she was intrigued and most definitely attracted to him. More than she wanted to admit, actually, and it had her feeling nervous.

  Tilly cinched her backpack up over her shoulder and replied, “Hey yourself.”

  “What a great store,” he said, turning momentarily back to the bookshelf, running his hand over the books. “Always so hard to choose just one.”

  She knew exactly what he meant. Books were one of Tilly’s few indulgences. She always had a pile beside her bed, in the living room, and in her office.

  Rob turned and walked over to where Tilly was standing. “Looks like you found a few things.”

  Tilly lifted her shopping bag and glanced up at him. “Gifts for my daughter,” she said, pausing for a moment and swallowing. She wished now that she’d shared more in the introduction circle so she could have avoided this awkward moment, but she hadn’t and now, for some reason, she felt like she needed to tell him. It all came tumbling out too fast. “And my husband. Because I’m married. I’m happily married. So, so, I bought him a gift.” She looked toward the door, repeated hurriedly, “Because, I’m happily married.”

  She could not believe she had just said that. All of that. What was it about this man that discombobulated her? Tilly took a deep breath and rubbed her lips together, avoiding Rob’s eyes. She secretly wished the floor would open up and suck her into some dark abyss, away from this man who had her rambling and acting strange.

  “I know you’re married.”

  She turned her head toward him and their eyes connected. Rob spoke just loud enough for Tilly to hear. “I saw you playing with your ring up at Mystic Vista.”

  Just then, the store door opened, causing the chimes to go off and jarring them out of the moment. Tilly saw this as her opportunity to leave before she got herself into trouble.

  “’Kay, well I’m going to go find something to eat. It was great meeting you. Take care.” Tilly lifted her hand to wave, smiled at him, and began to head for the door.

  He turned quickly and touched her arm. “Wait. I was about to get a bite, too. There’s a great Mexican place a few miles up the road. I’ve got my motorbike.” He pointed out the window to his bike. “And an extra helmet.” He stopped for a second before asking, “Why don’t you join me?”

  Tilly looked out the front window where she could see his bike. Nothing fancy, but it sure looked like fun. It had been years since she’d been on a bike, before she’d even met Mick. If nothing else, Tilly was up for the thrill of being on a motorbike. And besides, had she not just offered prayers of gratitude for the happiness and joy that was on its way? She was sure this was a sign. That’s all it was, right? The thrill and joy of being on a bike? Nothing to do with Rob.

  She shrugged, trying her best to be nonchalant. “Sure, why not?”

  Actually, there were plenty of reasons why not.

  They exited the store and Rob climbed on first, straddled the seat, then handed Tilly her helmet. She stuffed her gifts into her backpack and slipped it over both shoulders, wrapped her scarf around her neck, and put the helmet on. Tilly made a quick scan of the bike, trying to assess the most graceful way to get on. As if he had read her mind, Rob stuck his arm out toward her. “Best way to get on is to swing your right leg up and over and use my arm as a balancer until you get settled.”

  She followed his instructions and before she knew it she was nestled in behind him on the bike. Before he put his helmet on, he turned around and said, “Sorry, no handles, have to use me to hang on.” She forced herself to smile, trying to pretend this wasn’t a problem for her.

  As he backed out of the stall and maneuvered through the parking lot, Tilly wrapped her arms around his waist and felt the strength of Rob’s body as she leaned into him. She found herself aroused and feeling sensations she had not felt for a very long time. As he started to speed up, Tilly’s scarf went flying off. She squeezed his stomach to get his attention and tried to yell over the engine.

  “I’ve lost my scarf.”

  “What?”

  “My scarf,” she yelled.

  Rob pulled over, put down the kickstand and ran back to get the scarf. He wrapped it around her neck a few times and tucked it in. “There. That should work.” He flashed his dimples and got back on the bike. “Ready?” he asked over his shoulder.

  Tilly hesitated, knowing she should get off the bike. Right here, right now. Instead, she placed her hands on his hips. “Yes, I’m ready.”

  When they arrived at the restaurant, Tilly was ecstatic. Taking off her helmet and boasting a grin almost as wide as her face, she said, “I’d forgotten what a thrill it is to be on a bike. That was beyond fun! Thank you.”

  “Any time,” Rob replied.

  Once seated at the outside patio, Tilly pulled out her phone and told Rob, “I’ve got to send a text to the elders I’m traveling with, they’ll be wondering where I am.” She paused for a moment, considering what to say to Mabel. She decided on, “Go ahead and have dinner without me. I’m going to get something quick and then go back to the room.” Before hitting the send button, Tilly reconciled with herself the fact that most of what she had written was true. Then, before making sure the text had been delivered, she put her phone on airplane mode and tucked it into her pack.

  Over dinner, their conversation flowed with ease and was frequently accented with bouts of laughter. Rob asked questions about her life and was sincerely interested in what she shared. Tilly was acutely aware of how good it felt to be listened to and be the focus of Rob’s attention. As a result, she relaxed, opened up, and talked freely.

  Meanwhile, back at the hotel, Mabel and Bea discovered that Tilly wasn’t in her room and there was no sign that she had been. They both checked their phones, no messages from her either. They exchanged a look. Intuitively knowing something wasn’t right, they headed back to the bus. They weren’t sure where they were going, except that they were looking for Tilly.

  After about an hour of driving around Sedona, Bea spotted Tilly on the restaurant patio. “There! There she is.” Relief flooded her voice as she pointed for Mabel to see Tilly.

  When Bea saw a man sitting across from Tilly, her tone quickly turned from relief to annoyance. “Who’s that?”

  “I don’t know, but we’re going to find out,” Mabel said, trying to quell her irritation.

  Mabel had barely parked the bus when Bea opened her door, ready to march over to Tilly. Mabel quickly reached over and put her hand on Bea’s arm. “Slow down. Best if we don’t pounce on her.”

  “But I want to pounce. We thought she’d be back at the hotel hours ago, it’s late, no text or phone call and now she’s here,” Bea motioned to where the two were sitting, “with some guy.”

  Tilly was laughing hard and had her head tilted back. For a moment, they both watched. Tilly was happy. There was something both heart-warming and unsettling witnessing her like this.

  “Who do you think that guy is?” Bea’s voice softened momentarily as she was struck by the animation in Tilly’s expression and the joy radiating from her. Gifted in reading people, Bea knew with one glance that this man Tilly was s
itting with had a good, pure heart. It frightened her because she knew how this situation could go sideways. Real fast.

  “That’s not how our Tilly acts,” Bea said to Mabel. “Having dinner with some stranger. Especially one who looks like him.”

  “Maybe not, but we don’t know the whole story. So, let’s go over and introduce ourselves and find out who he is.”

  The two climbed out of the bus and walked in unison toward the unsuspecting duo. As they got close, Tilly was leaning forward and talking. She didn’t see them coming, but Rob did. He swiftly sat back in his seat, his body stiffening. Intuitively, he knew these were two of the elders Tilly had been telling him about. He saw the look in their eyes, especially the taller one with glasses, and it unsettled him. Tilly noticed the darkness come over his face and she turned to see what he was looking at.

  Oh crap! Echoed in her head when she spotted Mabel and Bea. She had no chance to do or say anything before they were at the table and Mabel was saying, “There you are, Tilly. We’ve been looking for you.”

  Tilly sat straight up. “Ahh, ahh,” was all that would come out.

  Bea said nothing, but stood with her arms crossed waiting to see what Tilly had to say for herself. Finally, when it was obvious Tilly couldn’t find words, Bea nodded her head toward the man sitting beside Tilly and said, “Who’s this?” Her eyes narrowed behind her glasses and she stared at him like he was bad weather.

  Rob had been taught to stand when introduced to a woman and shake her hand, but this woman, the taller one, frightened him. He remained in his chair. His legs were like Jell-O and he knew they wouldn’t hold him.

  “Tilly, why don’t you introduce us to your friend?” Mabel said and glanced at Bea, giving her the “be gentle” look. Bea looked away and shook her head. Both Tilly and Rob saw this exchange and were grateful for Mabel’s softness. Rob leaned on the table and stood, with his hand outstretched.

  “My name is Rob Sanchez. Tilly and I met on the Vortex Tour earlier today and were both hungry when we got back into town, so we came here for dinner.” His words poured out faster than he would’ve liked, indicating how nervous and intimidated he was.

  “Well, Mabel here—” Bea looked at Mabel and then back at Rob. “Mabel and me, we’re Tilly’s aunts and we’ve been looking for her. She told us she’d be back at the hotel, and when she wasn’t, we were worried.”

  Tilly looked down at the table, feeling Bea’s eyes burn into her. She cursed herself for having lied to them. Now here they were, having found her with Rob. And for the first time ever they had called themselves her aunts, indicating the traditional role and responsibilities they felt for her. She was mortified.

  The intensity of Bea and Mabel standing there was more than Tilly could handle. “Well, now that you’ve found me, how ’bout we get back to the hotel?” Tilly said as she stood. “I’m exhausted from the day.” She reached into her backpack for her wallet, pulled it out, and searched for some money.

  “It’s okay, Tilly,” Rob said. “I’ll get dinner.” She knew he could feel her embarrassment. Even though they’d only spent a few hours together, their connection was powerful and Tilly was doing everything she could to try and hide it from Bea and Mabel. But it wasn’t working.

  “Thanks.” She looked at him for a second, wishing Bea and Mabel would give them a moment alone so she could say what she really wanted to say. To thank him for an amazing day—for the ride on his bike and the exhilaration. To thank him for making her laugh, like really laugh. To thank him for listening to her. To thank him for waking something up in her, for igniting a spark that had been out for a long time. A real long time. To thank him for so very much. But that wasn’t going to happen. Not with Bea and Mabel standing there.

  Tilly tucked her wallet away and turned back to Rob. “It was nice to meet you. Enjoy the rest of your time here in Sedona.” Tilly looked at him and her eyes softened.

  As Bea and Mabel watched her, they began to understand why their Tilly was acting so strange. There was no denying the chemistry between their dear Tilly and this man.

  Tilly continued, “and thanks again. For the visit and for dinner.” Even though she had given him her cell number earlier in the evening and they had talked about doing something together tomorrow, nothing had been finalized. She wanted to say something about tomorrow, but she didn’t dare in front of Bea and Mabel.

  Rob stood. “Yeah, you too, Tilly.” He turned to the elders. “It was nice to meet you both. Safe travels.”

  “Thank you,” said Mabel. Bea gave him a forced grin.

  Tilly slipped her pack on and glanced back at Rob. Their eyes lingered. She smiled at him one last time, raised her hand and gave a slight wave then turned to leave.

  32

  All Actions Have Reactions

  THE THREE WOMEN drove back to the hotel in silence. A few times Tilly opened her mouth to explain to them what they had seen, but the truth was that she didn’t know what they had seen. She didn’t know how to describe the electricity and connection she felt with Rob. In fifteen years of marriage to Mick, not once, at least not until now, had she been this attracted to someone else. Sure, there were times she found someone physically attractive. She was human, after all, but this, this connection…it was different.

  When they got back to the hotel, Bea joined Tilly and Mabel in their room. Mabel nodded her head toward the table. Tilly pulled out a chair, collapsed into it and waited for them to join her. The two elders stood over by the door. Tilly couldn’t hear them, but out of the corner of her eyes she saw them talking. She was a jumble of emotions: guilt for her attraction to Rob; shame for lying to Mabel and Bea; delight in the fact that Rob found her attractive; fear about what the two women were going to say to her.

  After what seemed like an eternity to Tilly, Mabel and Bea joined her at the table. It was Mabel who spoke first, in a tone Tilly had never heard before. A chill slid down Tilly’s spine. “All actions have reactions, my girl. You know that.” Mabel folded her arms across her chest. Tilly knew she’d crossed the line. “Your lie scared us and caused unnecessary stress. You said you’d be back after the tour and when you weren’t, we got worried. But then after a few hours, when you still weren’t back, we got scared.”

  Tilly nodded. The truth was hard to deny.

  “Why did you lie to us?” Bea asked, anger apparent in her tone.

  Tilly took a breath and began to answer, but Bea raised her hand. “No. Wait. You don’t have to answer that. I already know.”

  Tilly sat back in her chair and crossed her arms. She felt the aunties staring at her. Watching her. She looked to the floor, avoiding their eyes.

  Bea sighed heavily and leaned back hard in her chair. “One of the greatest things about getting old is that very little shocks you anymore.” She turned her head to Tilly. “But this, your behavior, your disregard for us, and don’t even get me started on the way you were looking at that man.” Bea shook her head. “All of this has shocked me, Tilly. What’s going on with you?” She looked at Tilly for a long time, but Tilly didn’t have the words to answer or the courage to return the gaze. “Well, I guess that’s that then,” Bea said as she stood up. “I’m going to call it a night.” She looked down at Tilly and, try as she might to remain angry with her, she also knew that Tilly must have something pretty serious going on for her to act like this. It was extremely out of character. Bea reached down and cradled Tilly’s chin in her hand, gently lifting Tilly’s face to look at her. Words were not needed; Bea’s eyes stated her disappointment. After a long pause, Bea leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. “Good night, Tilly. Remember, I love you. I most certainly did not like your behavior tonight, but I do love you.”

  As Bea left, Mabel stood and walked to the bathroom. Tilly remained at the table. What the hell is happening to me? she wondered But there was no answer.

  A few minutes later, Mabel emerged fro
m the bathroom and said to Tilly, “Your turn.”

  Later, as Mabel and Tilly lay in their beds, awkward and unfamiliar silence swirled about them.

  33

  Trouble

  TRY AS SHE might, Tilly could not fall asleep. Instead, her mind replayed and replayed the day. Knowing an attempt at sleep was futile, she got up, threw on her sweats and a hoody, and headed to the hotel lobby to call Bette. She would know what to do.

  We all need one person we can rely on when the storm becomes too much to handle alone. Tilly’s one person was her best friend, Bette.

  Once she reached the hotel lobby, Tilly found a cozy chair and called Bette. She dialed their “I need to talk ring” that they’d started years ago, letting the phone ring twice, then hanging up and calling back in two minutes. Tilly kept looking at her phone, waiting impatiently for the two minutes to pass. When she called back, no one answered. She tried again. Just as she was about to hang up, Bette picked up, and before she could say anything, Tilly blurted, “Bette, it’s me.”

  “Tilly?”

  If Tilly had been paying attention, she’d have noticed the grogginess in Bette’s voice, but she wasn’t paying attention. She needed to talk. “Yeah, it’s me.”

  “It’s two in the morning. Is everything okay?”

  “Oh, sorry, Bette.” Tilly had no idea that she’d been lying in bed wide awake thinking about Rob, Mick, and her life for the last three hours. “But, I need to talk to you.”

  “I know, so just give me a sec.” Tilly waited, wondering how or where to start when Bette came back on the line. “All right, Tilly, I’m settled in. What’s up?”

  “I’m in trouble, Bette. Big, big trouble.”

  “Trouble? Do you need me to send money?”

  “No, not that kind of trouble. Worse.” Tilly rubbed her hand along her forehead. “I’ve met someone.” Hearing the words come out of her mouth made all of it even more real. Made it more intense and yet, more delicate.