"Well, you better hurry. I don't know how long the local news crew is going to be here, and I want you to be on TV with me."
I smile. Classic Jimmy. "I really don't see how that would do anybody any favors, but sure, why not?" I say. Because I look great right now, having barfed like twenty minutes ago. “I’ll talk to you soon,” I say. And we hang up.
I almost forget I'm supposed to stop at the convenience store for some medicine until I pull in last minute. Of course, it's completely full right now, and it takes me a few minutes to even find a parking spot.
I park like it’s a joke and run in. I find the medicine aisle and then the flu stuff. I haven't even taken the stuff in such a long time that I don't know what to get. I pick up a couple boxes, and I look on the back.
That's when I notice the tiny print.
Pregnant women should consult their physician before use.
I pause. It makes me think about the lady at work and what she told me. I shake my head again, even though I already know it's not true, but I don't know what it is about reading that on the box that makes me think twice.
I grab the fast-working daytime kind, and then I head over to the birth control and pregnancy tests section.
There are even more choices here. Where do I even begin?
I don't even know why I'm here right now.
Maybe it's just to prove to myself that what that lady said is not even possible right now. I've been on the pill since Lucas and I started going out. So yeah, there is a way I could be pregnant, but we’ve been pretty careful. Still, it can't hurt to be sure.
Or maybe it's me and Mayra’s obsession with that show I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant.
But either way, I decide I’ll just take a test really quick, and as soon as it comes back negative, I can take the flu medicine and get on with my life.
I arrive at the checkout counter, both items in hand. I ignore the look on the old lady’s face at the register. Then, I head back to my car, stuffing both items into my purse.
Six
Carlos
The first thing I notice about Valerie's sister is that she's definitely aged in the last few years.
Miranda was always a serious person, unlike Valerie.
Valerie was spontaneous and fun and loud. Unafraid to speak her mind and perfectly comfortable with going up to a total stranger and saying hi or asking them a question.
The complete opposite of me, in fact.
Maybe that's why we were good for each other. We kind of balanced each other out. At first, anyway. But I had my dark side too, and the arguments never stopped once we started having them.
Maybe it's because we were both young, teenagers. We didn't really know what we were doing. We were crazy and didn't know what it meant to grow up.
Anyway, Valerie’s sister looks different. Her clothes aren’t like the last time I saw her years ago. She reminds of a teacher.
We sit down in my office, and Manny leaves, closing the door quietly behind him. I'm sitting behind my desk, which I almost never use, and Miranda’s in a chair in front of me.
I’m a little embarrassed at how old and dusty this place looks. I don’t come in here more than once or twice a week. I have an accountant who handles all the money stuff for me, and she just brings stuff to sign every month. So there’s a mess in here, and I regret that I haven’t hired anybody yet to do some regular cleaning.
“Thank you for seeing me, Mr. Herrera.”
I look up from my desk. “You don’t have to do that. Just call me Carlos."
She nods.
I take a deep breath. I really wish I wasn’t here right now. If only I’d left five minutes earlier.
"So what can I do for you?"
“Well, Carlos. It's been a while, hasn’t it? You seem happy, though. Is this place yours?" she says, looking around.
I hate small talk. I wish she would just get to the point and tell me why she's here. What she's going to ask of me.
Because there is a question, that much I can tell. People don't just show up after this long just to say hi and see how you're doing.
"Thank you. Yes, it was my dad’s. He died about a year after Valerie."
"Oh, I'm so sorry." Her hands are at her chest for a moment and then back to her lap.
I nod and wait for her to go on.
She swallows quickly and looks me in the eye. "Carlos, I’m here because I need a favor. It's important. It's at the high school. I don't know if you know this, but I changed my major not long after my little sister died. I became a school counselor, and I got hired at our old school a couple of years ago. I work with the students there now helping them with their college applications but also with regards to their overall emotional health and well-being. Stepping in if there are problems at home, that kind of thing.”
I nod. That sounds like her. Valerie would have been proud.
She goes on. “We have an event going on tonight, actually, and it’s about raising drunk driving awareness. I don’t know if you know this, but there have been seven deaths in the last fifteen years in this county alone due to drunk driving, including Valerie’s, but most of them occurring on prom night. I know that wasn’t the case in Valerie's death, but alcohol plays such a huge role when it comes to automobile accidents involving teenagers and other students. And I never want anybody else to feel the pain that we felt in losing Valerie that night."
I'm already uncomfortable with this conversation.
I'm still wondering what she's going ask. I finally look up at her.
"Anyway, I set up this event at the high school tonight to raise awareness against drunk driving. And I really want you to be there. Actually, I’d like you to do more than be there, and I’ll go ahead and say it right now, and you can tell me what you think.”
I tense up but don’t say anything, so she goes on.
“We had a speaker booked for tonight to give a short speech on her experience with drunk driving. She was the driver and sole survivor of an accident that killed four of her friends on prom night several years ago. Not local or anything. But I thought she could really help students and make an impact with them on this issue. I just feel like it’s important, you know?"
I still don't say anything. In fact, I alternate between looking at her and looking down at my desk. I'm already wondering how I can say no to this.
"Carlos," she says. "I'm here to ask you if you will be our speaker tonight. The speaker I told you about just canceled on us this morning. She had a family emergency, and there's just no way she can make it. And we really need someone. Like I said, it’d be short, just a few minutes. You can say whatever you want. There will be other things going on, and it wouldn’t be just about you. There will be a local athlete there signing some things to raise money as well, and I have some things planned. But I was really hoping to have someone speak, someone who’s been there and gone through it. If you could do this for me, for Valerie, I just couldn't thank you enough."
I exhale. I think she’s done.
She’s waiting for me to say something.
I flinched a little when she said Valerie's name the first time, that I should do this for her. But I still don't know what to say to what she just asked me.
Speak? Tonight? In front of an entire high school?
About the one thing in my life that I never want to talk about again? The one thing I haven't even thought about since I got together with Naomi?
What she's asking of me is ridiculous, and there's no way I could do it.
I start to open my mouth to say no. I'm already shaking my head. But she interrupts me.
"Can you at least think about it? Please, Carlos?"
"I can’t,” I say.
We both jump a little when we hear a knock at the door. I think it must be Manny with another customer or something, but as soon as I look, I'm surprised to see it's actually Naomi. She has a questioning look on her face through the window of the door of my office. She quickly offers a friendly smile.
>
I motion for her to come in, and she sticks her head inside. Valerie’s sister turns back and looks at her too.
“Sorry. Am I interrupting something?" Naomi asks, smile still on her face.
“No, come in,” I say, standing.
That's the thing I love about Naomi right now. Any other girl would probably be upset already, thinking the worst thing about me having another woman in my office right now.
But not Naomi.
Instead, Naomi has a genuine smile on her face as she shakes Miranda’s hand and introduces herself as my wife. Miranda looks at me with a grin and says, “Your wife? Congratulations to you both.”
She turns back to Naomi. "It's so nice to meet you. I'm an old friend of Carlos. I was here to ask a favor. Maybe you can help me out. I really need a speaker for an event tonight, and I was hoping your husband would fill in for me.”
I wince when she says that. I know she's desperate to find somebody for this thing she’s doing, but this is crossing the line.
“It’s at the old high school, actually. I'm not sure if you went there too, but that's where we know each other from. My younger sister used to go out with your husband."
Naomi jumps in. “Oh, you’re Valerie’s sister. That makes sense. He showed me a picture of her once, and you look like her. I was wondering why you seemed so familiar.”
Miranda nods and smiles.
Naomi glances at me and then looks at Miranda again. “Yeah, he's told me all about Valerie, and I was so sorry to hear about what happened.“
“Yes, thank you. This is what it's about, actually. We had booked someone to speak tonight about drunk driving awareness for the kids with prom coming up and everything, but they canceled, and I was just telling Carlos he would be doing me the hugest favor in the world if he could come and speak for a few minutes about it. His experience with it, and and why it's important to prevent deaths that come about from drunk driving. It's one of the largest leading causes of death for high school students, and prevention is key.”
Naomi looks at me. "I think it's a great idea, honey. Are you gonna do it?"
"I was just telling Miranda here that I would have to think about it. I don't know if I can. We have our date night tonight, remember?” I say, hoping Naomi will get the hint. I’m not ashamed at all to use that as an excuse right now.
"Oh, that's not important. We can always reschedule date night. Besides, I would love to come with you tonight and support you." She walks over and takes my hand.
Why does what Naomi just did not surprise me in the least? This is just like her.
But she has to understand that this is not her decision. It's mine.
And my answer is no.
Maybe Miranda will think I'm rude, but I don't care. I'm not about to go back there. I don’t want to run into somebody from back then.
Maybe Valerie's parents will be there, and I’m sure they still hate me. Either way, I just can't do this.
As much as I am over it, there will always be some pain there where Valerie used to be. And knowing what part I played in her death.
And I just can't. No matter what Naomi says, no matter how much Miranda asks me to do it, I just can't.
So I say, "I'll think about it, like I said. Thanks for stopping by.”
I think the change in my tone of voice finally sends a message to Miranda that she needs to go.
“Well, if you decide to go for it, it’s at six o’clock at the high school. I really hope you’ll give it some thought.”
She gives me one last smile and hands me her card, but I can tell from the look on her face that she knows I’ll probably still say no.
I grumble thanks, and she leaves, closing the office door gently behind her. I plan on throwing her card away the minute Naomi turns her back.
Naomi looks at me. "You don’t want to do it, do you?" It comes out sounding more like a flat out statement than a question.
I take a deep breath, sigh, and sit back down, not wanting to have this discussion. Because I already know where this is going to go.
A fight. And I hate fighting with Naomi. I hate even thinking about the possibility of fighting with her and that being the last thing I said to her.
"Can I ask you why you don't want to do it?" She sits down in front of me. I look down at some paperwork on my desk.
"I just can’t, okay? Can we not talk about it? Can we just go on a date night and be done with it?" I say it all at once because if we drag this out into an argument that's what’s going to be said anyway.
"Carlos, I think this would be really good for you."
"Maybe. Maybe that's what you think. But at the end of the day, Naomi, I'm going to tell her no. And you should accept that."
The look on her face changes just a little bit. Just slightly, but I know her so well that I know that what I said just pissed her off.
There's not much that can piss Naomi off, and I can’t remember the last time we had a real fight, but it’s stuff like this that upsets her.
But I know I’m right. This is my decision, and as much as she thinks this may be a good idea, I disagree. It’ll just drudge up the past, and I never want to feel like that again. It took me a long time to get past the guilt over Valerie and that night.
She stands up and grabs her things. "I know you, Carlos. I love you. I think if she really needs somebody tonight, you should do it. I think it's the right thing to do. Like I said, you might benefit from it as well."
She goes to the door and gives me one last glance as she's leaving and says, "I'll see you at home."
And she’s gone.
Seven
Ryan
I walk outside, flinging open the screened porch door on my way.
I hear it bang shut, but I’m already halfway across the front porch. I pick up another box from the moving truck and hop back onto the porch. This time, I kick the shoe that fell out of the last box so that it keeps the porch door from closing again.
This place is still mostly empty, and it’ll probably take us a few months to fill it up, but it already feels like home.
Home, sweet home. I never thought I’d say that.
I certainly never thought of my parents’ house as a home growing up. They were always too wasted to be anything other than passed out, much less sit down for a family meal or something.
Now a real home has become my reality, starting tonight.
And it scares the crap out of me.
I’m walking down the hallway when Krista comes out of one of the bedrooms. She’s in sweatpants and a t-shirt, and her hair couldn’t be messier.
This is when she’s the most beautiful.
Krista hates the look because she says she doesn’t even have time to put on make-up anymore, but I couldn’t care less how she looks.
"You got that?" she asks. She’s saying it to tease me.
"Oh, I got it. Don't worry about it." I say with a wink.
I put the box down in the hallway, and I go up to her and squeeze her. I kiss her on the neck because I know it'll start her squirming and laughing.
Krista hates being tickled, but I can’t help but want to tickle her even more just because I know she hates it. She laughs and screams and tries to push me away. But I'm not about to let her escape that easily.
I pick her up and take her into our new bedroom, where only our mattresses and several boxes occupy the space. It'll still be the entire afternoon and maybe the evening before we get everything out of the moving truck and into the house.
And who knows how long it'll take us to put everything in its place.
But I don't care. I'm looking forward to figuring out where everything will go and making this house our new home.
I throw Krista onto the bed, landing beside her and continuing to kiss her on the neck. She’s still screaming and laughing, but she tries to keep it down.
I finally make my way to her mouth, and we start kissing. Krista's laughter turns silent as my hands take hers. My body rests on top
of hers, making sure she's not going anywhere. Our hands are clenched on either side of her head, and we close our eyes.
"I love you, Ryan,” she whispers.
"I know," I whisper back. "I love you too."
This is still relatively new for the both of us, but it's amazing how much I feel, how happy I am with Krista already.
From the moment I saw her, I liked her. And two weeks later, I knew I loved her.
And I told her so.
I have to admit it was one of the scariest moments of my life telling her that, but hearing her say it back to me, and watching her eyes as she did it, let's just say I don't know how drugs can compare.
As far as I know, Krista is my addiction. And it's one that, instead of taking away from us, only give us more.
We've only been together three months, and maybe in another case, I would've waited a little bit longer before asking her to move in with me, but the time just feels right.
She needed a new place because she was struggling to make ends meet, and I just got a raise and finally saved enough to put down a deposit for a home.
Then we found this place two days after hiring a realtor. As soon as we walked in, we knew it was for us.
The hardwood floors, the backyard, even the bedroom colors. It just felt like this home was made for us.
Like it had been waiting for us, and now we were here. And it was ours.
Our lives will start and end in this house. I just know it.
I still can't believe I found Krista.
After being alone for way too long, I met her one night out for dinner. I was with a couple of guys from work. They’d invited me out to this place in town I’d never been to.
I wasn’t one for going out much. I usually stayed home, worked out, and made something simple to eat for myself. I didn’t have many friends.
I still don’t. I had a really close friend back in high school, but it's been years since I've seen him.
Until Forever (Changing Hearts Book 4) Page 3
