I pull her close and hug her gently, burying my face in her hair and groan. “When did you get so smart, darlin’?”
She laughs softly and pulls away. “You forget we know you too well, Flash. It’s obvious to anyone that does. Fuck Ryder and get your woman. She feels the same, we can all see that. Maybe you can tear down those walls she hides behind and find out what’s making her scared. If anyone can, you can, honey.”
She kisses her fingers and sends it across to me as she winks and leaves my bedroom.
As the door closes, I lean back on the bed and curse Ryder. It’s all very well them telling me to go and get the girl but in doing so, I would be disobeying a direct order and that’s not how we work around here. No, I need a conversation with the big man himself before I even think of approaching the delectable Jennifer.
Now the idea’s in my head, I dress quickly and go in search of Ryder King before I change my fucked-up mind.
I search the usual places but finally find him working out in the gym. There’s nobody else present, so I swallow my nerves and sit beside him on the bench press as he shifts some weights. After a few minutes, he sits up and wipes the sweat from his face and looks at me with a considered expression before saying firmly, “No.”
Laughing, I shake my head. “I haven’t even told you why I’m here.”
Grinning, he sits astride the bench and faces me with a twinkle in his eye. “I don’t need to know the question because it’s written all over your face. If it was business, you wouldn’t be bothering me when I train. If it was something personal, you would wait until I was behind my desk. The fact it can’t wait tells me you need to be in a moment of courage to face me and like most men, that usually involves a woman. Stop me if I’m wrong but I doubt it.”
I stare at him miserably and almost see sympathy in his eyes. “Why not?”
He shrugs. “Because we protect those who seek us out. Jennifer is hurting and afraid and in no position to deal with the trouble you want to heap on her. She has a kid to think of and an asshole of a husband to deal with. When she’s ready she’ll ask for help but until then, she needs space to adjust to her situation. If you think anything of her at all, you’ll understand that the best way you can love the girl is to stay away.”
He reaches out and puts his hand on my shoulder and for the first time in my life, I see compassion behind his eyes. “I’m sorry, man.”
Three words I never expected to hear from him and they knock me for six. I can’t even answer him as he stands up and reaches for his water bottle, effectively cutting the conversation stone dead.
I know not to push my luck, so I just say in a low voice, “Thanks, Ryder.”
Turning on my heels, I leave him to it and take with me a sense of frustration that’s fast becoming my only companion.
As I head back to the bar, I think about Jennifer and wonder why she’s knocked me out so hard. I’ve had many girls, normal girlfriends and the numerous whores that live here. I haven’t even had a taste of Jennifer but that hasn’t stopped me wanting her more than anything in my life. I feel a real ache inside when she walks away from me and I hate every minute she speaks to another man. If she smiles at anyone other than me, I am insanely jealous and any words that spill from her lips in my direction are pounced on and treasured in my memory.
As I walk back the way I came, I see her in the distance leaving Brewer’s house. The way she walks creates an urge in me that won’t go away and I picture my imminent date with the shower. Nothing can relieve the ache I feel for that woman who is lost in thought heading back toward the main house and I know it’s gonna be a long night ahead while I sit lusting over something that I can’t claim as my own.
7
Jennifer
It’s a slow night that’s dragging. I think I’ve cleaned the bar several times over because there’s nothing else to do. I know a few of them headed out somewhere early evening but they’re not back and the ones left are either chilling in their rooms or otherwise occupied in the gym or cinema.
The men that do sit around are just playing cards and drinking and it’s typical that the first time I get the evening to myself nobody is around to chat to.
I’m trying not to think about Flash because, for some reason, I can’t stop obsessing about him. I’ve always been attracted to him, who wouldn’t be? The trouble is, I can’t let anyone in at the moment because it’s not fair on them. No matter how hard I try though, he just won’t leave me. He’s the first thing I think of when I wake in the morning and I spend the day desperate for just one glimpse of him. When I do see him, I pray it’s not with one of the other women here because it’s like a physical blow when I do. Flash is popular around here for a reason. Not only is he sex personified, but he’s also a decent guy. He’s funny, attentive and kind and I don’t miss that he plays with the other Reaper’s kids with enjoyment and patience. He is perfect in every way but one. He will break my heart.
As I work, I feel the ever-present tears waiting to catch me in a weak moment. I know if I let him in it will tear me apart when I have to leave because I will leave this place. No matter how much I want to stay, I know I can’t; Greyson will see to that. At the moment he doesn’t know where we are because I left the house when he was away and fled with just a small bag. Ryder arranged for my mail to be redirected here, God knows how and I’m playing a waiting game while I figure things out.
“Hey, Jen, fancy some company?”
I look up and see Bonnie, Snake’s old lady looking at me carefully. I’m not sure how long she’s been watching but I laugh self-consciously and smile. “Please, it’s dead in here, where is everyone?”
She grabs a stool and I hand her the usual white wine. “A few of them have gone out of town on business and the rest are chilling around the compound.”
She looks at me with concern. “You know, Jen, it must be hard for you.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re trying to cope with Imogen, surrounded by strangers and I’m not sure I could be as strong as you. You know, tell me to mind my own business but what really brought you here?”
Sighing, I pour myself a vodka and don’t miss the worry in her eyes as I take a large slug. Leaning on the bar, I say softly, “I had to leave, Bonnie. Greyson was, shall we say, difficult, and it was becoming an intolerable situation.”
“Why, what did he do?”
I take a deep breath and maybe it’s because of the Dutch courage inside me, or because Bonnie is just so friendly, I open up a little. “If it was just me, I would have been stronger. Greyson was a difficult man to live with and if things weren’t done the way he liked, he rewarded me with his fists.”
Bonnie looks shocked and I take another gulp. “He had so much rage in him and I never knew what sort of mood he was bringing home at the end of the day. Most of the time I played the dutiful wife and things were ok, but sometimes, for no reason, he would fly into a rage and beat the crap out of me.”
Bonnie looks close to tears and I smile shakily. “Maybe that’s why I started to drink, or maybe it was because I’m so weak it was the only strength I could cling to.”
Reaching out, Bonnie grabs hold of my hand and says emphatically, “Fuck him. You’re well rid of a creep like that and if you’ll let me, I’ll teach you to fight so you never have to feel vulnerable again.”
I stare at her in surprise. “Fight?”
Grinning, she leans forward and whispers, “Between me and you, I’m quite good at it. I taught most of the women here moves that even their old men want to learn. Ashton will back me up because when she arrived, I made it my mission to teach her to look after herself, me and Ryder that is.”
She laughs at my expression. “Yes, the men teach us too. It’s what they do best—well, maybe not best, if you know what I mean, but those men will teach you tricks your ex-husband will learn to his extreme disadvantage.”
Taking the glass from my hand, she says sternly, “No more liquor, just learning. I
f you’re gonna fight back, honey, you need to get in shape both mentally and physically.”
I feel overwhelmed by her kindness and make to speak but she silences me, saying, “Don’t thank me, just learn and that will be all the thanks I need.”
We are interrupted by voices heading toward the bar and she grins as the bar is suddenly full of more testosterone than a girl can handle. I watch as her man Snake heads straight for her and feel as if I’m intruding when I see the look they share.
Snake is an impressive man. Like all of them, he is built like a machine and covered in tattoos. His head is shaven and the tattoo of a snake decorates his arm and neck giving him his name. However, the love he has for Bonnie is written all over his formidable face as he approaches and in one move lifts her off her stool and pulls her into his arms. He kisses her relentlessly while I look on, wishing somebody loved me with just a small amount of the passion they share.
Soon I am busy taking orders as the men demand more beer than a man should be able to stand and I am grateful to be busy and divert the attention from my tainted life.
As I work, I look for the one man who I can’t stop thinking about and fight back the disappointment when he doesn’t show.
Angel comes across and says sweetly, “Hey, Jen, do you need a hand, you seem busy?”
Nodding gratefully, I watch as she jumps over the bar to lots of whistles and catcalls and smiles seductively at the nearest biker, “What can I get you, honey?”
I grin as she pouts suggestively at him as he makes some lewd comment and everyone laughs.
Far from fearing the crowd I live among; I love them like my own family. They may be overpowering but they have good hearts. When I first came here, I hated the fact the women were called whores and here just to satisfy the single men’s needs. Ashton told me she had felt the same but the girls love it. To be honest, they pity the old ladies because they get to play the field with more eye candy than a girl has any right to taste. They can leave if they want and are encouraged to find jobs and learn to stand on their own two feet. Some of them take the fancy of one of the Reapers and become an old lady, others meet guys from outside and leave the compound behind. It’s all a little unorthodox but it works and only when you live among them, do you fully understand how special this place is.
The evening continues long into the night and it’s close to 3 am before I get to my bed. I’m exhausted but can’t sleep because the letter I received just won’t go away.
I know your secret.
Even the thought that someone does fills me with terror. The trouble is, I have no one to turn to because this is my secret to take with me to the grave. I picture Imogen’s beautiful face and push the tears away. She is so beautiful, so innocent and so unspoiled. It’s my job to make sure she stays that way because if she, or anyone else, knew the truth, our lives would never be the same again.
I press my face into the pillow and fight the tears that threaten to soak it with my grief. Crying myself to sleep at night has become routine for me and it’s always when the darkness falls and the silence claims me that I allow the darkness in.
As has become the habit, I drift to sleep on troubled thoughts. There are no sweet dreams to make me content just nightmares that don’t let up even when I wake because the secret I live with is destroying me.
8
Flash
I have kept away for two weeks. Every job going has had my name on it because I need to distance myself from the one woman who is causing me so much trouble.
When Ryder warned me off, I took notice and immersed myself in my work. I was the first to volunteer and the last to return. I can’t even chill in the bar because the sight of Jennifer brings so much pain it hurts.
Most of my evenings are spent curled up in the cinema or training at the gym. I have so much pent up frustration inside me and no way of easing it up. The other guys think it’s funny and the whores are bored with the whole situation. Every fucking member of the Twisted Reapers is laughing at my expense because I was always the one who played the field and indulged on every sweet treat on offer.
I used to boast that no woman would ever tie me down and then Jennifer walked in.
“Flash, wait up.”
I stop in my tracks and see Ashton racing toward me looking as pretty as a picture. Ryder’s old lady and the love of his life. She came here much the same as Jennifer and yet the bastard married her the same evening. He told us it was to protect her, but we saw the look in his eyes when she walked through those doors. He was blown away and yet, unlike me, he had the authority to call the shots. Hypocritical bastard. Not that I would ever say that to his face, no, nobody goes against Ryder unless they’ve got a death wish.
I smile as Ashton stops and pants, “You walk so fast, what’s up, I was calling and yet you were lost in your own thoughts?”
I shrug and try to look unconcerned. “Nothing much. Just the usual shit we have to deal with.”
She smiles and I can see she doesn’t believe a word I say. She holds an envelope out to me and says breathlessly, “I don’t suppose you could give this to Jennifer?”
Backing off, I say roughly, “Sorry, you should ask someone else. Sorry, Ashton, I just need to keep a distance between us and you can thank your old man for that.”
She shakes her head and looks annoyed. “Yes, I figured you had words. Well, if Ryder asks, tell him I made you.”
She grins impishly and I roll my eyes, reaching for the letter. “Why me?”
Suddenly, her face softens and her eyes sparkle. “Because unlike my husband, I have eyes. He thinks Jennifer needs space but I can see she needs a friend more.”
Shaking my head, I say lightly, “She has you, why don’t you give it to her?”
“Because I’m not the sort of friend I think she needs. She needs someone to open up to. Someone she can trust who has her best interests at heart. Someone who can tear down those walls of steel she hides behind and make it all go away. Someone strong and loyal who would walk on hot coals to protect her. Maybe someone like you, Flash because, from the look of things, you could use a friend like that yourself.”
I see the understanding in her eyes and the desire to make two halves whole. However, she is not the man I answer to, so I hold out the letter and say wearily, “You mean well, darlin’, but I take orders from your husband. If he says it’s ok to spend time with her, then fine. I don’t ignore a direct order, even if it’s coming from you.”
She looks annoyed but I can tell it’s not aimed at me. Pocketing the letter, she shrugs and turns to walk away and I feel like a first-class bastard. Then she turns and says with determination. “Leave it with me, Flash, sometimes a man needs to see the bigger picture and needs someone to point that out to him.”
As I watch her walk away, I laugh to myself. If there is anyone in this compound who can change Ryder’s mind, it’s that determined lady marching toward the main house. I almost pity him because, by the look in her eye, she’s not gonna be happy with hearing no.
In less than an hour, I’m called to Ryder’s office. Rock came to find me in the gym and said roughly, “Ryder needs a word and it won’t wait.”
Disguising the huge smile that threatens to break across my face, I shrug and towel off. This should be interesting.
For once Ryder is alone when I reach his office which makes me nervous. I’m not sure why, maybe because I’m used to seeing Snake or Brewer sitting nearby but more because he looks angry—in fact, he’s raging and my heart starts banging like a drum as he frowns and says roughly, “Close the door.”
I try not to let my nerves show and when he nods to the seat opposite, I sit on the edge of it ready for anything.
He holds Jennifer’s letter in his hand and turns it thoughtfully while appearing to consider his words. Then when he looks up, I see the fire blazing in his eyes and wonder if I’ve got long to live.
“We’ve got a problem.”
I say nothing and he taps the letter o
n the desk before saying, “Do you know anything about these letters?”
Shaking my head, I say in surprise, “No, what is it?”
Slamming the letter down, Ryder says in a hard voice. “She’s been getting these hand-delivered to her mailbox. No postmark or indication where they’re from. Her neighbor collects them for us and Brewer’s been picking them up. We think they’re from her husband but can’t be sure.”
I look at him with many questions inside and he looks at me in disgust. “Her husband is a problem.”
I feel the nerves take a hold of my senses because I know that look and Ryder wouldn’t be wearing it if Jennifer wasn’t involved in some kind of shit storm.
I get my head in the game and say roughly, “What do you know?”
He sighs heavily and leans forward. “Ashton’s been worried about Jennifer for a while, even before she came here for help. She’s been knocking back the liquor and keeping it close. Bonnie told Snake she opened up a little the other night and told her the bastard used to knock her about.”
I feel the rage building as I hear his words. I picture Jennifer at the hands of that monster and snarl, “I’ll deal with him.”
Ryder shakes his head. “Not this time.”
I shout, “Don’t hold me back from this, Ryder. I want him to get what’s coming to him and it has to be me.”
Ryder yells, “Shut the fuck up and listen.”
I fall back but feel the rage controlling my reasoning as he snarls, “Snake ran a check on him and it’s not good. Hitting his wife is the least of his crimes. It’s no wonder she ran if she found out what he was really running.”
Something about the tremor in his voice shocks me way more than the words that next fall from his lips. “He’s a dealer. Not drugs, children.”
Flash Page 3
