Hard Lessons: (A Wild Minds Prequel Novel)

by Charlotte West

  Call me a coward, but I was avoiding Billy. Even though I didn’t need to be present for Addy’s lessons, I’d elected to stay and watch. In fact, Addy and I had been camping out on the staff bus for a few hours. We were still in Seattle. Wanks and Janks were playing a rare back-to-back show.

  Addy giggled at something Joseph explained. I sat on the couch half listening, half scrolling through my phone. The headmaster from Briarwood Academy had contacted me again, emailing to say there was an opening for the next school year. I bit my lip, thumb hovering over the delete button. I wasn’t interested, was I?

  The bus door opened and the floors shook as Perry entered. A skinny kid with glasses, he was one of Billy’s three assistants and also had lasted the longest. “Hi Daisy,” he said, phone in hand. The damn thing was permanently attached, lest he ever miss a call from Billy. The bottom dropped out of my stomach. Was I being summoned for my epic firing now? This morning I’d picked Addy up from her overnighter, then we’d come directly to Joseph’s bus. Addy had pouted at the mention of schoolwork.

  “What’s up?” I asked, my voice light and unnaturally high. Addy glanced up from her schoolwork, eyes narrowed. Could she sense my inner upheaval? Even though I knew I’d have to leave her soon, I wasn’t prepared for it to happen so fast. I loved her like she was my own.

  “Not much. Mr. Wanks needs to talk to Joseph.”

  “Oh?” My brow dipped.

  Joseph made a similar face to mine.

  “Yeah.” Perry shifted on his feet, clearly uncomfortable. He addressed Joseph, “He’s waiting for you on stage. I’m to escort you there.”

  Slowly, Joseph stood from the table. “Addison, read chapter three while I’m gone okay?”

  Addy nodded. Joseph followed Perry off the bus. As soon as they were gone, Trent and two other security guys boarded. What in the hell?

  “Trent what’s going on?”

  The gold-toothed head of security didn’t answer me. He had his serious “I’m going to kick some ass” face on. I stood from the couch and stepped in his path. “What’s going on?” I asked again.

  “Don’t get in the way, Daisy. This doesn’t concern you,” he said. He cracked his knuckles. I wasn’t intimated. I knew this guy. He let Addy ride around on him like a horse for god’s sake.

  I poked Trent in the chest. “What’s. Going. On?”

  He looked to the ceiling. A gesture I recognized well. He often did it when dealing with Billy or the band, seeking god for patience. “Joseph’s out. We’re here to pack up his stuff.”

  Trent brushed past me, as did the other two security guards. Addy watched them go by, eyes wide. “Daisy?” she asked unsure.

  “It’s okay, sweetheart.” I patted her head as I followed the group to the back.

  “I don’t understand,” I said to Trent. He stood in the middle of the sleeping area while the other two guys began to sort through Joseph’s stuff: tattered copies of books, a wallet, a picture of an older gentlemen and woman—his parents, I assumed.

  Trent shrugged. “What’s there to understand? Billy wants him gone. So he’s gone.”

  “But what did he do?” Addy loved him. Even though she pouted at the mention of schoolwork, Joseph actually made it fun. She always laughed. She always learned.

  Trent shrugged again. “Dunno, that’s something you’ll have to ask him.”

  “Oh, I plan to.” I crossed my arms and watched the guards pack up Joseph’s stuff. It seemed so cruel, filtering through his personal things, carelessly stuffing them into black garbage bags. Why was Billy doing this?

  The guys finished and slung the bags over their shoulders. They filed out. For a moment I stood in stunned silence. Had that really just happened? Addy hummed at the table and tapped her fingers. “I’m bored,” she said.

  I turned to her and smiled. How was I going to explain this? I worried about people coming in and out of Addy’s life. I didn’t want her to have abandonment issues. This was Billy’s fault. Two years and I still didn’t understand the man.

  “Knock, knock,” A female voice chirped outside the bus before stepping on. What now? I moved forward intent on telling the person to screw off. Then I saw it was Paula with Fiona. The mother and daughter looked almost exactly alike—wispy blond hair, big cornflower-blue eyes. “Hi, Daisy,” she said on a bright smile. “Fiona and I were just bringing Steve some lunch and we decided to get some ice cream, maybe go to the aquarium. We were hoping Addy might be able to go with us.”

  “Yes! Yes!” Addy jumped from the booth and dropped to her knees in front of me, hands clasped as if in prayer. Much begging and pleading commenced. “Can I go please, please, please, can I go?”

  Why not? It wasn’t like she had any studies to return to. A new thought occurred. I was going to have to find another tutor. Great. I added up all the shit Billy had recently put me through.

  No dating, flower.

  Mind getting me some sparkling water?

  Addy comes first.

  I snorted, recognizing the hypocrisy in his statement. He loved his daughter but he didn’t always put her first. He doesn’t know how to, I mentally defended. I put my reasonable self aside. Anger started a slow, burning path under my skin. He’d fired Joseph, the man I was dating, a friend, and at the same time made my job even more difficult.

  “Daisy, are you okay?” Paula asked carefully.

  I came back into the moment. Addy, Paula and Fiona were staring at me like I’d lost my mind. Maybe I was losing it a little bit. Billy Wanks had me tied up in all sorts of crazy knots.

  “I’m fine,” I said.

  “You kinda drifted off there for a bit. You sure you’re all right?” Paula asked quietly.

  “I’m fine.” I played with a strand of Addy’s fine, dark hair. “I’d love it if you would take Addy for the afternoon. I’ve got some business to see to.” And by “business” I meant kicking the ass of one tyrannical rock star. That’s right folks—this redhead had just blown her top.

  I tried Joseph’s cell phone a few times but it took me directly to voicemail. Finally I settled for a text. Sorry, I tapped out. Then, I don’t know what’s going on but I’m going to fix this.

  I marched through the arena, unholy hellfire in my steps. I blazed through backstage and onto the stage—no band. I wanted to scream. I kept my stride up as I burst through the back door. Outside, it had started to rain. Lightning streaked across the dark grey sky. Perfect, the weather matched my mood. Our bus lights were on. Ha, caught you motherfucker. I banged on the door. It opened. I stomped up the steps. My hair hung in wet tendrils, makeup likely running down my face.

  The whole band was there, plus Trent. Billy sat on the couch, phone in one hand and a bottle of beer in the other. He was playing that damn Candy Crush game. I could hear the tune, the sound of the pieces of candy exploding or whatever it was they did.

  “Daisy?” Jett asked. Is it possible for steam to come out of someone’s ears? It sure felt like it was coming out of mine.

  “Hey, flower.” Billy glanced up, eyeing my dripping hair. “You’re going to catch a cold if you wander about in the rain like that.” Oh, so he wanted to play it casual, like nothing was wrong, like he hadn’t fired Joseph.

  “Hey, Billy.” I stepped closer. My sneakers left wet imprints on the hardwood floor.

  “Daisy you all right?” Chord asked.

  I kept my focus on Billy and answered Chord. “You know, you’re the second one who’s asked me that today.”

  “I think she’s finally lost it,” Turner whispered loudly. Chord or Jett chuckled.

  “You kind of look like that girl from ‘The Grudge’ right now,” Chord observed.

  “I feel like it.” I stood in front of Billy.

  The blond rocker’s eyes stayed firmly on his Candy Crush game. “How’s your day been Billy?” I kept my voice calm. Inside I trembled with rage.

  Billy’s jaw flexed, thumb sliding little pieces of animated candy to and fro. “Actually, now that y
ou mention it, it’s been kind of shitty. I woke up and you and my daughter were nowhere to be found.” Billy paused and took a long drink of his beer. “Then because you weren’t here I had to find someone to make me coffee.”

  “You poor thing.” I sounded hoarse. Usually, I summoned Perry or one of Billy’s assistants to bring him his morning cup of joe. God forbid he call them himself.

  Billy lifted a shoulder. “It’s not a big deal. Although Terry—”

  “Perry,” I corrected.

  “Right. Perry forgot to put milk in my coffee. Wrong way to start the day, I tell you.”

  Behind me Jett said, “It’s a crying shame, mate.”

  A half-empty bottle of tequila sat on the window ledge behind Billy. I reached past him, popped the top and took a swallow. Yikes, that burned. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand.

  “Oh my god, she’s day drinking,” Turner said in mock horror.

  “Billy?”

  “Yeah, flower?” he asked, mildly curious.

  “I’m sorry I wasn’t here this morning. And I’m sorry I didn’t make you coffee.”

  “It’s all right, yeah? You can make it up to me by making me something good tonight. How long does it take to make that meatloaf you’ve made before?”

  I took a deep breath, bottle of tequila clutched tightly in my hand. “It takes about four hours. It’s too late for that now. I’m sorry about that too.” One day, when I was feeling particularly delightful, I’d made my mother’s meatloaf for Addy and the band. Billy had taken one bite and declared it the best meal he’d ever had, then he forbade any of the band from eating any more of it. “My meatloaf,” he’d said, hoarding it.

  “You don’t need to apologize, flower. We’ll just send Terry out for something.” The time on his Candy Crush game expired. He lost the level. “Fuck,” he drawled out. “I can’t get past this level. I need someone to call the manufacturer and tell me how to beat it.”

  I inhaled. “Billy, I’m sorry that your day’s been so shitty. Mines been bad, too. But I think you already know that.” Because he was the creator of this shit storm.

  “Hope it gets better,” he mumbled. He’d restarted the level.

  “Oh, I think it’s going to turn around any minute now. Unfortunately, I think yours is about to get worse.” In one quick movement I snatched the phone from his hand and threw it across the room. Chord and Turner ducked out of the way. The phone shattered on impact, the Candy Crush song dwindled to a sad tune then muted.

  “What the fuck!” Billy glared at me. Oh, I had his attention now.

  I wasn’t done. “That was for everything you said to me last night and how you’re treating me now.” All in all I thought he was getting off easy. Doormat Daisy was a thing of the past. “And this …” I raised the bottle of tequila up and over Billy’s head and began to pour … “is for firing Joseph.”

  “Holy shit,” Chord murmured.

  Billy sat stunned for one single, beautiful moment, then he shot to his feet, tequila pouring down his face. Whoops. Big whoops. It took two point three seconds for the magnitude of what I’d just done to hit home. This wasn’t just flipping Billy off, or dying his hair or even telling him to fuck off. This was full assault. I’d broken his phone. I’d dumped a bottle of tequila over his head. His green eyes burned with the same amount of rage I’d felt only moments ago. My courage packed its bags and ran away. I thought it best to follow it. I swiveled and raced to the door. Not fast enough. In three giant strides Billy caught me. His body careened into mine, pressing me into a wall. Not hurting, but definitely trapping me. I struggled a bit, but there was no getting around his massive frame. His front was to my back. I jabbed an elbow out, striking his side. Billy exhaled but didn’t move. “That’s a-fucking-nough,” he said, crowding me more. “What the fuck has gotten into you?”

  I let out a whimper. Tears cascaded down my face. “You fired Joseph.”

  “Yeah,” he ground out against my ear. I could feel the stares of the band and Trent on us. We were giving them quite the show.

  “Billy, I think you should step back, give Daisy some space,” Trent spoke up.

  “I think you should shut the fuck up, Trent,” Billy retorted, his breath hot against my cheek.

  The big man gave me a “well I tried, what can you do?” look. My outrage flared, reignited. “You’re just going to let him manhandle me like this?” I asked Trent, the band.

  “I’m not hurting you,” Billy spat out.

  Somehow I managed to flip around. My hands went to Billy’s chest and pushed. “What is wrong with you?” I pushed again. Billy didn’t budge. If anything this made me angrier. Damn his superior strength and his fine chest and his beautiful eyes. “Why do you keep jerking me around?” Another push. I was so blind in my own rage I didn’t see Billy’s anger rising again. “I don’t get it.” More pushing. “Why did you fire Joseph?” I screeched out.

  “Because he wanted my fucking nanny!” Billy yelled, stepping back. He slapped his wet chest. “And I’ll be damned if some sniveling tutor takes you from me.”

  “I’m not yours!” I shouted, even though it sounded false, didn’t ring true.

  He sneered. “You’ve been mine since the day you slapped that cigarette out of my hand and demanded I get my head out of my arse.”

  My lips tightened, I spoke softly. “I remember that differently.”

  He let out a noise, the sound a combination of a roar and groan. He dragged his hand through his hair, droplets of tequila sprayed everywhere. “You say I keep jerking you around, but you’re the one who’s pulling all the strings. I don’t fucking understand you. What more do you want from me? I cooked for you.” Ugh, was he talking about the crunchy soup? I’d hardly call that a four-course meal. “I go to the grocery store for you, risked contracting Ebola and god knows what else for you.” Huh? Oh, that’s right, Billy mentioned signing something for a snotty-nosed kid while at the market. “I tell you shit I’ve never told anyone. I let you in. Jesus, what fucking more do you want?”

  There were some shuffling noises and I watched over Billy’s shoulder as the guys quietly left the bus. Jett shot me a pointed look and shook his head. So he was disappointed in me. He thought I was playing Billy. How the hell had this all turned on me? When had I become the bad guy? The bus door shut with an audible click. We were alone.

  I swallowed back a thickness building in my throat. Billy’s chest heaved. My brow scrunched. I leaned heavily against the wall. All that was left inside of me was a pit of raging sadness and confusion. “This is exhausting, going toe to toe with you all the time.” I spoke my thoughts out loud. I didn’t know which way was up anymore, which way was down. I didn’t know right from wrong.

  Billy snorted, in agreement or disagreement, I couldn’t tell.

  “This isn’t me.” I’d never gotten so angry to the point of destruction. Billy’s shattered phone lay near my feet.

  “What if it is you, and you just never knew it?” Billy said. Some of the anger had left his face. But I could still something burning just below the surface, the leftover adrenaline from our fight.

  I put my hands behind my back. “It’s not me,” I insisted. “You bring out the worst in me.” I was still a little angry. It was a downright mean thing to say. Luckily, Billy’s ego wasn’t quite so fragile as to take offense.

  He stepped closer to me. “I bring out the best in you.” He stuck his tongue in his cheek. “Or maybe it’s the opposite. You bring out the best in me. I haven’t yelled at a single assistant today and all because I kept thinking, Daisy wouldn’t like that. It’s given me a headache you know. This ‘having a conscience’ is a son of bitch. No wonder everyone else is always in such a sour mood. It sucks the fun out of everything.”

  Despite the horribleness of his statement, I laughed.

  “Ah, there she is. Did you know I live to see that smile?” Billy cupped my cheek. He stunk of tequila. I didn’t care. “Don’t be cross with me, flower. I can’t s
tand it.” I swallowed hard. As easy as it was to be angry with him, it was even easier forgiving him. Call me a glutton for punishment. Billy had me in his web. Maybe I didn’t want to get free. He twirled a lock of my hair around his finger and regarded me with half-lidded eyes. “Did I ever tell you, how much I love the color of your hair?”

  “I know you have a thing for redheads.” There wasn’t any bitterness in my voice. I was just stating a fact.

  “I have a thing for this redhead.” He tugged on the strand and let it go. His hands settled on my waist. I felt the warmth of his palms burn through my damp T-shirt. Gooseflesh broke out on my back and arms, everywhere. “It’s time to tell the truth, flower. No more games. No more outs. I’m into you. And if you don’t push me away in two seconds, I’m going to kiss you.”

  One second. Two seconds. I let the time tick by.

  Billy smiled, wicked and wanting. His head bent and he captured my mouth in a kiss. How had I ever compared Joseph’s kiss to Billy’s? There was no comparison. Joseph was candlelight and Billy was a raging inferno. His tongue swept in, dominant and commanding. I’d thought I could settle for Joseph, for nice. But there would be no settling, not while Billy Wanks was in my life. His hand came up and palmed my breast. He broke the kiss, eyes on his hand working my breast as he ran a thumb over the nipple. I shuddered. “I’ve been thinking about these since Thanksgiving. How soft they felt in my hands. I didn’t get to see them then. You going to let me see them now?”

  Thanksgiving reminded me of Addy. “What about Ad—”

  He cut me off with a quick kiss. “Isn’t it time for Daisy to come first?” His hand drifted from my breast and back to my hip. Clever fingers crept under my top, grazed the band of my jeans.

  “We need to talk about this.” What did this mean? What would happen to Addy if this went south? I hated myself for asking, for putting the brakes on our moment. Billy had just confessed he was into me. I was into him. Any other day I’d be all over him like honey on a hot biscuit. But there was a dark-haired little girl in the way. “When you interviewed me …” I was slightly out of breath. “You have rules, too.” No sleeping with the help.