Living for Love and Dying for Loyalty

by Mz. Lady P

  It’s cold outside so I decided to wear my cream and black Akira Poncho with black leggings and my Michael Kors rain boots. I still have to look my best just in case Rahmeek comes. I may feel miserable, but I will never give that nigga the satisfaction of seeing me look miserable.

  On the way over to Niyah and Hassan’s house, I was nervous as hell. All I could think about was what would happen when I saw Rahmeek. Once I pulled into their driveway, I realized that this wasn’t a dinner. It was a damn party. I’m about to kill Niyah! Rahmeek is definitely going to be here! I sat in the car as long as could before putting on my game face and going in. Rahmeek wasn’t there when I entered the house. I was relieved that he wasn’t there. I walked around until I found Niyah and Hassan in the kitchen.

  Niyah ran over to me and hugged me tight. “Hey Aja, I’m so glad you made it! I have missed you so much.”

  “I missed you too, Niyah! I thought this was dinner. It looks like a party to me.”

  “It’s both. Just relax. You’re going to be okay,” Niyah said as she checked the food cooking on the stove.

  “Hey Hassan, how are you doing big bro?” I asked as I walked over to him and gave him a big hug.

  “I’m good. Blessed to be here. I don’t know where I would be without my baby.”

  I noticed that he was walking with a slight limp.

  “How is therapy coming along?” I asked.

  “Man, that shit is painful! But, I will be out and about real soon.”

  That’s what up! When will the food be ready? We hungry,” I said while rubbing my belly.

  “Niyah told me you been sick lately. Don’t let Rah get to you. He will come around.”

  Hassan put his arm around me. “I don’t think so. He blames me for what happened to you.”

  “Wow, I didn’t know that. I got shot because some broke ass niggas carjacked me.”

  I gave Hassan a hug because knowing he didn’t blame me for him getting shot made me feel a lot better.

  Finally, the food was ready so I made my way to the dining area. I saw a few familiar faces from Gresham Courts. Niyah hooked up a wonderful dinner of pot roast with carrots and potatoes, smothered cabbage, baked macaroni, and cornbread. We sat around eating and laughing. It felt good to laugh for a change. Everything was going fine until I noticed Rahmeek coming into the dining room with Karima.

  He had the biggest smile on his face and had the nerve to be holding her hand. My smile instantly turned into a frown. Everything inside of me wanted to whoop Karima’s ass because she thought she was really doing something. I had to play it cool because my baby was under stress already. Seeing them together hurt my soul, especially since he insisted they weren’t together.

  I’m pregnant with his son and he has moved on with this Chia Pet looking bitch. This nigga didn’t even acknowledge my presence. That hurt my poor heart and soul. I sat there with my game face on, but I was dying on the inside.

  They both sat down and started eating like they were a happy couple. The whole scene made me sick to my stomach. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore I excused myself and went to the bathroom. I threw up everything I had eaten all the while crying. A few minutes later, there was a knock at the bathroom door.

  “It’s me, Niyah. Can I come in, Aja?”

  “Yeah, come in.”

  “Aja, I’m so sorry,” Niyah said after closing the door behind her. “I had no idea he would bring that bitch with him. You want me to put that ho out ‘cause you know I will. I should go fuck both of them up.”

  “No, Niyah, it’s not necessary. I’m good. Thanks for checking on me though.”

  “Damn Aja, don’t cry. Please don’t cry.”

  “I’m going through hell and he doesn’t even care. As a matter of fact, let me get the fuck out of here. Go get my purse and a crowbar. I will leave out the back door,” I said, getting up off the floor.

  “What the fuck you need a crowbar for, Aja?”

  “Stop asking questions. Just go get it and you will see.”

  As soon as she brought me the crowbar, I walked out the back door around to the front of the house and started busting every window and every headlight in Rahmeek’s car. He must have forgotten who the fuck I was!

  I drove off when I saw everybody run out. I know how much he loves his cocaine white Range Rover. Fuck him and his truck! I didn’t regret that shit, but doing it didn’t make me feel any better.

  As soon as I made it home, I cried because I couldn’t believe Rahmeek had done that to me. I drifted off to sleep, but I woke up because I felt someone’s presence in my bedroom. I looked up and saw Rahmeek sitting in a chair at the foot of my bed.

  “I should beat your ass for fucking up my truck, Aja.” Rahmeek said

  “Fuck you and your truck. Get out my house and leave my keys on the kitchen table!”

  “I would never put my hands on you again, but watch your mouth, Aja. Real talk.”

  “What do you want from me, Rahmeek?”

  “I came over here to apologize for bringing Karima with me tonight. I was wrong for that shit.”

  “Rahmeek, I don’t care about that bitch. She is a non fucking factor. So don’t apologize to me for that. Apologize for the way you have treated me. Do you know what I have been through these last six months? I’m high risk and I have high blood pressure and it’s your fault.”

  “I was bogus as hell for the way I been treating you, but what the fuck you expect?”

  “I expect for you to put the baby first. Come to appointments, check on me, and make sure the baby is okay. You don’t have to be with me. I have scheduled a DNA test to be done when I give birth to confirm that you are his father.”

  “I never said I didn’t want to be with you or that I wasn’t the father.”

  “You didn’t have to say he wasn’t yours; you showed me.”

  Rahmeek sat on the edge of the bed. He tried pulling me onto his arms, but I wasn’t feeling him at this moment.

  “I’m sorry I’ve been acting like an asshole. I want to be with you, and I want us to work it out for the baby.”

  “Rahmeek, that sounds good, but what I’m I suppose to do with you and Markese at each other’s head?”

  “I have decided to squash the beef. That’s the only way we will be a family and make this shit work. Aja, I have done a lot of soul searching and my life ain’t worth living if I don’t have you or my seed in it.”

  “Promise me that you won’t ever leave us again.”

  “Aja, I’m not going anywhere and to let you know how serious I am, I’m getting out the game. It’s not going to be that easy though. It’s hard as hell to get out, but you’re worth it. I have something really big planned. After that, I’m done with this shit.

  I hugged Rahmeek tight as hell. “Please be careful. I feel like something isn’t right.”

  “You don’t have to worry about me. I’m cool. I just want you to focus on the baby and how you’re going to pay for my car.”

  “I’m not paying for shit. That’s my payback to your ass for treating me like I was a random ass bitch,” I laughed. “Come here and give me a kiss. I missed you so much Rahmeek.”

  “I missed you too baby.” Rahmeek climbed into bed with me and kissed my stomach over and over again. I was happy we made up, but I needed to know a couple of things about his relationship with Karima.

  “What’s up with you and Karima?

  “I’m going to keep it one hundred with you. I have been dealing with Karima off and on over the years. We have been fucking around lately, but that shit is over.

  “It better be over. Let that bitch know immediately. I have no plans on sharing you.”

  “Trust me she already know whatever we had going on is over.”

  For the rest of the night, we laid in bed and cuddled. It felt so good laying there with him. So many nights I prayed that this moment would return. Our little family is now complete. I can’t help but to think about this plan Rahmeek was talking about. I have
a strange feeling about it. I don’t know what I will do if it Rah gets killed or goes to jail.

  Chapter 22 - Markese

  I’m happy as hell that Trish is back at home where she belongs. She and the kids are getting along just fine. They actually love being around her. I have been with Trish for quite some time so I know when something ain’t right. Trish is not the same person she was before all this bullshit went down. Trish is hiding something from me. I can feel it. That night when we decided to make this shit work, I noticed hickeys on her neck and bite marks on her breasts. I didn’t have to ask where they came from. I know she has been with another nigga. I just kept quiet because I wasn’t in the position to question her about shit.

  I couldn’t believe there was another man who had sex with Trish. I know it sounds crazy, but Trish belongs to me. That’s my pussy and she had no right to give it away. I broke her out of her virginity and I have always prided myself on the fact that I was the only one she has ever been with. I brought all this on myself. I cheated so she went out and did the same.

  Lately, she has been all jumpy and shit. It’s like she’s scared of me or something. I really need to talk to her. We have been doing great so I should just leave it alone and continue making it up to her. I’ve been resting and relaxing so I can have a clear head when I meet up with Rahmeek. Plus this shit with Juan got a nigga on pins and needles. He is really threatening us. I can’t wait until we get his ass. After all these years of working with him, I never thought it would come to this.

  Carmen hasn’t attempted to contact me. I can’t wrap my mind around the fact that she just left her kids. What type of mother is she? They have been asking about her every day. I just keep telling them that she will be back. How can I tell my kids their mother is a selfish bitch and don’t give a fuck about them?

  Lying in the bed, I heard Trish in the bathroom on the phone whispering. I got up to listen at the door.

  “Please stop calling me and threatening me. I love Markese. What happened between us was wrong.”

  Trish sounded like she was crying. She became silent so the person on the other end had to be responding to what she just had said. I prayed I was dreaming, but her next statement let me know that I wasn’t dreaming.

  “Yeah, I’ll meet you with the money, but I can’t do this anymore. Markese is starting to get suspicious.”

  After hearing her say this, I was pissed the fuckoff. I wanted to break her fucking neck. I got back in bed and pretended to be sleep. I had my eyes slightly open. I watched her as she came out the bathroom crying. She went straight to our wall safe and took out some of my hard-earned money. I couldn’t believe Trish was taking money from our household and giving it away.

  “Markese.”

  “Yeah.” I said trying to sound like I was sleep.

  “I’m about to go to the mall and grab a couple of items. I’ll be back later.”

  I sat up in bed and started putting my shoes on. “That’s a good idea. I’ll go with you.”

  “No, baby, that’s alright. Get you some rest. I will be back shortly.” Trish walked over to the bed and kissed me. It took everything inside of me not to lay hands on her ass. I watched as she walked out the front door, to give my money to someone else.

  As soon as Trish left, I grabbed my keys and followed her. My heart was hurting because she’s letting somebody extort her out of money. Trish knows that I will kill for her, and she didn’t even come to me for help. My pride is definitely hurt.

  I was curious to know who the fuck had the balls to fuck with my girl. I followed her for about thirty minutes. She was driving fast as hell. I almost lost her, but I was able to keep up with her. The route that she was taking was very familiar to me. I began to fear the worst when I saw her pull into Mont’s driveway.

  I parked a way’s down so that she couldn’t see me. I was still close enough to see the front of the house. Immediately, my hurt turned into anger and rage. Trish walked up to Mont and handed this nigga the money she took from my safe. He grabbed her ass and attempted to kiss her on the lips, but she turned away. I took my gun out of the glove compartment and took the safety off. I was about to get out and murder both of their disloyal asses. I quickly changed my mind. I couldn’t kill them in broad day light. Plus, I wanted to holla at Trish first. I need to know why she did this to me.

  I was more disappointed in Mont. he is one of my best friends. I have to know why he doing this to me as well. I know he doesn’t need the money. So, what’s his point of taking money from my girl? Lately, he has been acting like a real bitch; whining about us hooking up with Rahmeek. It really don’t matter why he doing this. I’m definitely putting a bullet in his head.

  I want to kill them so bad right now, but I have to wait this one out. I already got beef with Juan and now I got beef with a nigga I break bread with. I left because I had to clear my head. This was some embarrassing shit. I didn’t want the crew knowing about this.

  I went back to our crib to wait on her. I went straight to my man cave and opened up a fifth of Remy. I drank it straight from the bottle. That shit was so strong my insides burned. I fired up a blunt and went into the living room. I wanted her to see me as soon as she walked in the door. I sat my gun on my lap and continued to drink while smoking my blunt. Trish is going to tell me what the fuck is going on tonight, or else I’m going to kill her and throw her body in Lake Michigan.

  Chapter 23 - Trish

  This shit has got to stop and now. So far, I have given Mont almost $500,000 of Markese’s money. It’s been a month since Mont started blackmailing me. When he first called me asking for money, I flat out refused. That was until he sent a package to my shop. I opened it up and there was a DVD inside. There were instructions for me to watch it and call him afterwards. I watched it and all I could do was cry.

  I couldn’t believe that he had been videotaping me the entire time I was at his house. I hated myself for going to his house in the first place. After watching the tape, I called him and that was the first time I met him to give him money. I knew I should have told Markese right then, but the images on the tape were too embarrassing.

  Markese has been trying so hard to make things right. I have fallen in love with his kids. Our life has been going so good. How could I ruin everything? Ever since I left Mont’s house I have been crying all the way home. I prayed Markese was gone when I made it back. I had no such luck.

  “Markese, baby, where are you?” I called while I walked through the house looking for him.

  “I’m right here.”

  I turned on the living room light and Markese was sitting there with his gun in his lap. “Why the hell you sitting in the dark?”

  “Where have you been, Trish?” He had this crazy look in his eyes. He was drinking straight from the Remy bottle.

  “I told you I was going to the mall.”

  He sat the bottle down and took a pull from his blunt. “What did you buy?”

  “They didn’t have anything I liked.”

  Markese stood up with his gun out and moved closer to me. I could tell he was drunk. He had that look in his eyes that scared the shit out of me.

  “I’m gonna ask your ass again, and I want the truth,” he said slowly, his menacing eyes were boring a hole into my soul. “Where the fuck you been?”

  Oh my God he knows, I thought to myself. I was silent as I stared at my man like a deer in headlights.

  “Markese,” I stammered. “Please don’t do this. I can’t tell you-”

  I didn’t get a chance to finish my plea because Markese punched me in my mouth. He just started beating me like I was a nigga in the street. Punch after punch, kick after kick, all over my body, my head, and my face. I fell to the floor and curled into a ball. I knew that both of my eyes were going to be black when this was all over.

  “How long you been fucking Mont and giving him my money?” Markese picked me up and body slamming me back onto the floor.

  My body was in so much pain. I felt lik
e he had broken every bone in my body.

  “It only happened once when I was staying there.”

  “Bitch, you mean to tell me while I was out looking for your ass, you and that nigga were laid up?”

  Markese started to whooping my ass some more.

  “It wasn’t like that!” I screamed. “He raped me and now keeps asking for more and more money.” I was trying my best to explain to him.

  “How much of my money have you given this nigga?”

  “I’m not sure. I’m so sorry, Markese! You have to believe me. I never meant for this to happen.”

  I grabbing on to his pants leg and held on for dear life. He yanked his me off of his leg with so much force that I fell back and hit my head on the coffee table.

  “Bitch please! You were at the nigga’s house. What the fuck did you think was going to happen? Get your trifling ass up.”

  Markese grabbed me by my hair and dragged me upstairs.

  “Take off all your fucking clothes. Bitch you better not come out this bathroom until you scrub all that nigga’s dirt off of you.”

  “Markese, please stop. You have to let me explain.” I begged and pleaded for him to stop.

  “Shut the fuck up and strip. You like to be a ho, I should treat your skank ass like one. Stop all that damn crying. You weren’t crying when you were hiding out from me!”

  I slowly took off all my clothes. I stepped into the shower and turned the water on. There were so many cuts and bruises on my body that it stung when the water hit them. I cried harder as the water poured over me. I cried because the water hurt. I cried because I brought this on myself. I should have just told him what was going on. Now it looks like I was in on this shit. Markese sat on the toilet and watched me like hawk with his gun still in his hand.