The Life She Wished For (Birds of Paradise Book 2)

by ChaShiree M.

  Suddenly, she starts laughing hysterically. What the Fuck? What is so funny? Does she think I’m joking?

  As we arrive at the office door, I put her down and open it. I reach in to turn the lights on. I nudge her in, lock the door, and lean against it. I need to calm down before I can touch her. If I don’t, I’m going to take her right here; and her first time will not be on a desk.

  “Tell me why you were laughing. Is this a joke to you?”

  “I think the joke is you believing my brothers will wait to meet you tomorrow. Jairo will blow this building up to get to me. Ask Ren. He learned the hard way. They will kill everyone in here to get to me.” She says with such confidence and vivre. She crosses her arms as if issuing me a challenge and I find it sexy as hell. Let’s face it, everything about her is sexy but her fire is hot as fuck. I notice her eyes linger on my crotch. She can see the tent in my pants, which I am not going to hide. She needs to get used to seeing this daily.

  I keep thinking maybe I went about this wrong. She obviously didn’t take seriously everything I said to her the night I walked away. I need to correct that now. I walk to her and ask, “Myshka, did you forget the last words I said to you? I told you to wait for me and I would always know what is going on. I said if you needed me I would be here, and I was coming back for you. So, what the fuck were you doing with him?”

  She visibly swallows and begins to fidget with the bottom of her shirt. I recognize the fear. She realizes her error, but I also see want. She is breathing heavy and I see her breasts rising and falling. Her pupils have dilated, making her eyes seem bigger, yet hooded and cloudy as they fill with lust. I can smell her arousal. It appears my girl likes me handling her. We can surely make that an everyday thing.

  “Mikhail, you left. Disappeared. I didn’t hear from you. Nothing. You decided you didn’t want me. I decided to go on with my life. Don’t I deserve to be happy? To find someone who wants me?”

  I couldn’t be more shocked then if she dropped to her knees and blew me right now. Oh, hell no. She thinks I didn’t want her? She thinks I left her? Shit! I really screwed up. Look at her, rejected and resigned to this idea. I see the start of tears in her eyes and I feel like a failure. I did all of this to protect her, and I’m the one who hurt her. I must fix this. I grab her face and make her look at me. I tell her everything I have been feeling in the months we have been apart.

  “My little mouse. I am sorry you thought I didn’t want you. I thought my last words to you would assail you of that idea; but alas, I failed. There were things in my life I had to fix. I will tell you about them soon. I want you to know that I have suffered every day that we were not together. My men followed you and reported everything you did. You were never out of my sight. I promise I will tell you everything. But first I must taste you, Kotenok. I need the taste of you in my senses. Then we will go home and start our future.”

  “Go home? What are you talking about? I have a home. I don’t know what is going on, but I am leaving now, Ok? I need to thi…”

  I shut off the rest of her logic with my mouth. The moment our mouths touch I feel my heart begin to beat again. I lick the seam of her mouth, encouraging her to let me in. My kitten doesn’t disappoint. She opens for me and it is a powerful emotion to have her submit to me this little bit. I slide my tongue into her mouth and swallow her whole. I want to dominate every part of her body. My innocent little angel kisses me back with more fervor than experience. It makes me harder with the knowledge. I am the only man to kiss her. Ever.

  I walk her backwards to the desk and lift her on it. It pains me to pull away from her sweet mouth, but I must for a second. She needs to know where this is going. She is wrestling with my head trying to go after my mouth; and as much as I want to nibble on her mouth and make it swollen from my assault, I need to calm her down, so she can hear me.

  “Calm down baby. I’m not going anywhere. Shhh…Precious give me a sec, ok? I need to make sure you understand” I look her in her eyes, making sure they are both focused on me before I continue. “From this moment forward, I will not disappear again. We are going to move your shit into our house this weekend, and that will be the end. I will not allow you to hide from me, run from me, or deny me. You are mine, Myshka. Have been since I first laid eyes on you.”

  I know I have just dropped a bomb on her about her moving in, but I don’t give two shit’s. I have waited long enough, put our future off long enough, and I am done waiting. She needs to be ready sooner rather than later, and now is the time.

  First things first.

  “Before we walk out of here Myshka, I need to fulfill one of my fantasies. Then later, I will treat you the way you deserve. You are to remain completely still, little Phoenix. No noise. I will love the sounds you make, but not here where others can hear. Those noises are just for me.”

  I push her back farther on the desk while systematically removing her jeans. Those fucking jeans she had painted on her luscious ass. I am going to spank her for that later, but right now I must taste and savor. I can’t wait to get my tongue inside that pink, untouched little pussy she has and make it open for me.

  OMG! Is it possible to be so excited you could pass out? I mean, seriously? I feel faint now, and I’m freaking out. I am happy to see him, but angry and confused at the same time. He has been gone for three months. Not to mention that when I needed him he didn’t show up like he said he would. Why wouldn’t he come to me? When you really want someone to believe you and trust what you say, you follow through. He didn’t; and I think that broke me more than anything else.

  I thought he would be my protection, and that didn’t happen. Then he comes back like he owns me. Who the hell does he think he is? I want to say this to him. I feel the need to yell at him for everything he didn’t do, say, and uphold. I should be doing this. But; unfortunately, when I get around him I lose my ability to do anything but what he tells me.

  Right now, I can’t seem to think past the kiss he just laid on me. I was completely wrapped in it and didn’t realize he had propped me up on the desk; until he pulled away. I am trapped in a fog and I can’t see my way out. The real question is, do I want to? I am supposed to be mad at him, shun him, and walk away. He deserves it, but my heart won’t let me. It wants its other half, and who am I to deny it? I do need answers; and I intend to get them, but I need to feed my soul first.

  “Krasivyy! You are exquisite. I see the weeping from your pussy on the lips, Myshka. Look at this pretty dripping pussy. Crying and begging for me.”

  Holy shit! I don’t how to describe my feelings. I’m anxious, fidgety, and tense all at once. I can’t control my breathing. All I want to do is throw myself at him and lay at his feet, so he can do what he pleases. I need for him to do something. The staring and talking he is doing has me so jacked up I feel like I’m on speed. I feel the need to start touching myself. It is something I have never d… oh God! Is he removing my panties? He is. He is removing my panties… fuck… he is running his nose through my slit as he inhales and…can a person cum from this? Because I swear I’m about to!

  “Kitten, your pussy is my kryptonite. I can sit and smell you all day. I won’t deny myself the chance. You’re going to let me lick this bouquet, my beautiful girl? Next, I’m going to suck on your gorgeous tits until you beg me to stop: but not a second before I leave my mark on them. You want that, don’t you, Myshka? Look at how dewy your pussy is. It is leaking juice for me while waiting to be absorbed and made a part of my DNA. Once I swallow your juices you will forever be a part of me.”

  His mouth is the most sensual part of the seduction. The nasty things he says should make me feel disgusted or embarrassed; but all I feel is desire. I feel pure unadulterated hedonism. He makes me want to be someone different, just when I am with him. But I wouldn’t know where to begin. I figure an orgasm is a great way to start. “Mikhail, please! I don’t think I can take anymore! Please do something, anything!”

  “You beg so nice, Myshka. You want
me to run my finger thru your pussy like this?” He runs his fingers up the middle of my vajayjay back and forth. Every time he passes over my clit, I feel an electric jolt go through my body, making me wetter and needier.

  Oh God, that feels so good! I’m practically vibrating at this point; the need is so high. I’m begging him for what I’m not sure; but for something. Anything. Oh..oh..oh…

  “Ah ah ah…not yet precious. Fuck! You’re so responsive. When I get my dick in you I’m going to have to be ready to head you off. You’re going to go off like a rocket. What a gift. To think, I almost missed you kitten. Now, to quench my thirst. Prop your legs on the desk and lean back. I want to see my new toy.”

  Is he serious? I can’t do that…I mean…I’ve never… ok, calm down Phoenix. You must learn to be more adventurous and open to please any man you want to be your husband. Baby steps. Just close your eyes and do what he says…you know you want to.

  Ok.

  Here we go.

  I lean back on my hands and slowly raise my legs onto the desk. The look of relief on his face makes me feel marginally better. It means he didn’t automatically think I would give in. He has some doubt about his power over me, and that empowers me more. Sitting here wanton and exposed is unnerving, but also exciting. I feel exhilarated taking the first step toward getting what I want, and that is quite a feat.

  The real coup is the look in his eye as he looks at me. He is not looking at a little inexperienced girl or some chick he picked up. He is looking at me with possession and lust. When he is not being guarded I see tenderness and devotion, but right now I need the passion.

  “Little Phoenix. Are you dripping on my desk?”

  HIS. He owns this club? Crap balls! No wonder no one tried to stop him from killing Jasper. Wow. It adds more to what I do not know about him; and although I care, right now I don’t.

  “Mikhail please.”

  “Please what Phoenix? What do you want from me?”

  “I want you to finish this. I feel itchy. Like something is crawling over me and I need you to fix it.”

  “Myshka…you slay me with your words. You know what you’re feeling? Do you know what that itchy feeling is?”

  I shake my head hard because I don’t know. But I want it to go away, and he is the only one who can make it.

  “What you are feeling, Kotenok is our souls wrestling for one another. Yours is stretching to make room for me and mine is doing the same. You are feeling the final stage of accommodation before we become one. Then no one can tear us apart.”

  Whoa. That was not what I expected him to say. I am baffled that he feels it too and admits it freely. Aren’t men like him supposed to be all macho. ‘I’m man I don’t talk about my feelings’? If he couldn’t get any more perfect, he just found a way.

  “Now, tell me what you want me to do.”

  “I don’t know. I only know I need. Mikhail, please. I can’t take it anymore. Oh God! Please. I can’t. I can’t…I…”

  “Shhh…It’s ok precious. I won’t torture you anymore. I can see how far gone you are and that turns me on more than you know.”

  He drops to his knees suddenly and…

  “oooooooooo… Yes…pleassssseeee…ungh…Mikhail?”

  “It’s ok love. I got you. But remember I told you to be quiet. Let go and let me quench this thirst.”

  He is licking like he hasn’t had a meal in weeks. The very first touch of his tongue sets a fire inside me. I thought he was going to go slow, slight, or something. He took a swipe from almost my ass to the top and holy shit…why did no one tell me it felt so good? My body is alight with feelings and sensations I didn’t know were possible. I want to move. Is it ok to move? I don’t know. Guess there is only one way to find out.

  “Yes. Ride my face precious. Take your release. This is just a teaser of what we will do together, and how you will feel. But, you are making too much noise and I don’t want to have to spank this pussy: but I will if you don’t. Shut. The. Fuck. Up. Now.”

  Each word is punctuated with a lick. How am I supposed to take this onslaught quietly? He is demented if he thinks I can be… Smack.

  “Ahhhhh…yes, yes, yes…”

  He just spanked my vajayjay and I came. That had to be an orgasm. It was too intense to be anything else. Wow! I had no idea. No wonder people get sex addictions. Who wouldn’t want to feel that all the time? I know I do.

  After I recover from this one.

  Are aftershocks normal? He is still drinking, and I am still shaking. Fuck. Everything is so sensitive now and he won’t stop. Not that I really want him to.

  “Mikhail please…I can’t take anymore…please.” The slurping noises should be embarrassing but instead I feel euphoric and sated. However, I feel so much; and I don’t know where to start to process it.

  “My beautiful siren. You are breathtaking when you cum. But do not interrupt me from drinking from this pink and sweet fountain. Look at you. Your thighs are wet and sticky with your desire. My desk is a puddle of sugar. You are spread out before me, and you want me to hurry? I think not. Now lift your top. I want to see my tits. Beautiful little Phoenix. You have no idea how much your body is the stuff of male fantasies. A body made for love, made for fucking, and made to bare my seed.”

  Mother of all that is Holy. That is the hottest thing I have ever heard. His wet mouth teases my overly sensitive nipple and I am ready for another round. I’m back to squirming. I have no idea when I grabbed his head, but I can’t stop myself from bucking and smashing his face into my chest.

  Who knew that a nipple could be sensitive and filled with pleasure? Having him suck my nipples like they are giving him life is sensual and unexpected. Those little buttons have a hardwire to my vajayjay. As I do, he bites me a little, setting off an explosion unlike anything I have ever known. Grabbing his head and pushing him further into me, I feel no hesitation. With him, I become someone different.

  I love it.

  “I knew your breasts would taste as good as your pussy. Everything about you is sweet; yet sinful at the same time. You’re a modern-day Aphrodite, who has put me under your spell. Only I don’t ever want to be released. You will never get away from me. You know that don’t you, Krasivvy? Do you know I am now your future? Your beginning, and your end?”

  I am so dazed, I couldn’t answer if I wanted to. I feel warm and flush; womanly and desired. It is a feeling I want to hold on to with both hands. However, Mikhail has other plans. Apparently not answering him is a no no. Suddenly, I am off the desk and against the wall with his hand around my neck. His breath is inches from my mouth. I should feel fear, but all I feel is excitement and elation, and it’s dripping down my leg.

  Looking into his eyes, I need to see what kind of danger I am in. But I don’t see danger, all I see is desire, ownership, and fear. Why the fear?

  “Answer me Phoenix. Do you understand that you belong to me now? I would kill to keep you, no matter who it is I must fight? Do you know what it means to find your soulmate? The other half of who you are? The person who makes you better, human, and alive? I wasn’t alive until I met you. I had a heart but there was no blood flowing through it, Kotenok. The minute I laid eyes on you across the room, I felt the first pump. The first gush of ebb and flow. I felt the first breath of clean oxygen leave my mouth. Those are not feelings people have every day. I will never allow it to be taken from me: allow, YOU, to be taken from me. Tell me you understand.”

  There is a desperation in his beautiful poetry. He looks almost on the brink of madness. Almost as if he has foreseen something and is trying to head it off. As crazy as he seems right now with me pinned against the wall, half naked in his office; I understand what he is saying. This is what I felt the first night. Hence, the devastation when he disappeared. I get it. As much as I want him to suffer as I did, by walking away from him now without answering his question (it would be exactly what he deserves); I can’t do that. To deny him would be to flatline my own heart and soul. I have
lived through it once, I won’t force myself to do it again. I will surrender to him here and now and put us both out of our misery.

  “Yes, Mikhail. I understand. I am yours. I am not going anywhere unless you lie to me or break my heart. You must tell me why you left. I need to know that I am your equal. I have spent my life being sheltered in one way or another, I won’t do that in my relationship. I will respect your wishes always and try to abide by them. But as a person who has yet had a chance to spread my wings, I do not wish for them to be clipped before they soar. Can you understand what I am asking of YOU?”

  He grabs my face and stares intently. He looks around me searching for something. I don’t know why, but this makes me nervous. I hold my breath waiting for whatever test he is conducting to end and see if I passed. After what feels like forever his eyes rest on mine, and with his next words he seals our fates.

  “I would never attempt to clip your wings Phoenix. However; as your future husband, it is my job to always protect you. Even from yourself, and this I will do. I will enjoy watching you come into your own and I will champion it. But should you blatantly disobey me, I will not hesitate to spank your beautiful ass until it is red from my hand and is the color of your hair. Do you understand? I cannot and will not make it if something happened to you.”

  “I understand Mikhail. This is my wish too.” After all we did today this one statement shouldn’t make me blush, but it does.

  Lifting my face, he says, “don’t ever be ashamed of what you need from me. That is why we are each other’s missing piece. We each possess what the other desires, and it is a wonderful thing. Come. Let me get you dressed, take you home, and we’ll talk. Then I am going to put you in bed. I will not take you tonight, my love. I have special plans for that.

  In a daze, I follow him and walk toward my future.

  Shit. That was the hardest fucking ride of my life. After tasting all the sugar coming out of her sweet pussy it took everything I had not to rip our clothes off and slam my dick into her virgin cunt. See, there is this whole other side to me; inside of my soul.