Defining Human (Only Human Book 4)

by Candace Blevins

  I’ve seen pictures of two coins with Nebuchadnezzar’s profile. Both show his nose coming straight down from his forehead, and this man’s nose certainly looked like the rough drawings on the coins. He was stocky, and not as short as I’d first assumed. With a beard and long hair, he could look like the iconic Jesus, but he was clean shaven with a businessman’s haircut and an expensive suit. He was clearly middle-Eastern, but more muscled. Bigger. Stockier. Griffin might be uglier than sin, but Rinaldo kind of reminded me of an Iraqi Rambo, but refined.

  The bible makes Nebuchadnezzar sound like a bumbling idiot, but the history books tell of a wise king who conquered just about every country adjacent to his land — and more — and who made sure his people had plenty of educational options. The women under his rule had more rights than just about any other time in written history. They could get an education and work, they could take part in government. He built museums, colleges, and walls to keep his people safe. One of the gates of his wall is one of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World. And that talk of the Tower of Babel? Nonsense, designed to try to ridicule a ziggurat he built to his own god, Marduk. As much as I wanted to hate him, I respected him.

  Respect or not, this was my time to escape, and to take care of everyone who wanted to control me. Nebuchadnezzar is tightly tied with the lions in history, and yet he and Nathan seemed to be at odds. Also, the bible tells of a time he went lycanthrope, though the history books say this was actually his son-in-law. Either way, he’s tied to the lions and wolves, somehow, and so was I.

  I focused on the part of my brain Master Gavin didn’t have access to, and expanded it until I could make better use of it. I’d found another node I could use as the source of my thoughts, and I used it to concentrate on my connection to Cora.

  And just like that, it was back. Not even a damned vampire could break it. She pushed energy to me — the energy of the Pack. Every last werewolf. Thousands of them. I created a quarterstaff, cut Gavin’s arms off and his body in two. I’d launched myself towards Abbott when Cora screamed, “Don’t kill him!”

  I’d been aiming to take his head off, but I merely took the top of it off, just above his eyes. I had no idea if he could come back from that and I didn’t much care, but he was out of commission for the moment and Nebuchadnezzar’s muscle was headed for me.

  “Stop.”

  The command from the ancient Babylonian king made everyone freeze, including his own men.

  “I do not wish to make an enemy of you, Kirsten O’Shea.” Nebuchadnezzar’s voice boomed through the night. “I’ve met you. I’ve seen you in action. This is enough, for now. We will speak over a video conference later.”

  Gavin’s lock on my brain was gone and my thoughts were my own. I was pretty sure I was bleeding from my nose and ears again, but with the energy of thousands of wolves, I could power past any physical weaknesses. For a while, anyway.

  “You put thoughts in my head from two hundred miles away. Why should I let you live?”

  “Because you can’t kill me.”

  I stretched out my hand and sent a laser to take his head off, but he moved too fast. He fucking flew away, possibly as fast as Marco. Fuck me.

  I killed the two men who’d exited the plane first with my laser, and exploded the head of the pilot. I didn’t feel anyone else, and with Randall’s energy I thought I’d sense even a Strigorii.

  Nathan came out of the woods and pulled me to him, and I released the power of the wolves and let Nathan bathe me in the energy of his lions. Cora ran to us, and Nathan opened his arms so he held us both. Randall walked to us with caution, as if he didn’t know if I were friend or foe.

  “I’m me,” I told them. “I can’t feel Gavin in my head anymore at all.” I looked at Randall. “He severed the thread in my head, the blood tie to you, so you probably can’t speak to me telepathically. He couldn’t find anything connecting me to Cora. I don’t think it’s in my head, I think it’s either an energy connection or a soul connection, maybe?”

  No one said anything, so I continued. “I couldn’t feel her while he controlled me, but I found a part of my brain he hadn’t paid attention to, and started thinking to myself in there. When we got here, I just made that part bigger and used it to connect to her again.” I turned in Nathan’s arms so I faced Randall completely. “Thank you for letting me use your power.”

  Nathan let go of me, and I turned to see he’d taken his shirt off and was handing it to me. “Thanks.” I’m sure I’d have remembered my nipple-less bra and scanty undies soon, but I’d forgotten in the commotion.

  I pulled Nathan’s shirt over my head and looked at the bodies of Gavin and Abbott. The limo driver was dead — true dead. I vaguely remembered taking his head off when I cut Gavin in two.

  “They have to die. I don’t know if Gavin will still control me when he awakens or not, but I can’t let them live.”

  “You can’t kill them.”

  I jumped at Aaron’s voice, and turned to him to argue, but he spoke again before I could say anything.

  “Abbott took you against my wishes, but once he did, he let me know how you were doing and gave us regular updates, as well as pictures and video. We could see that Gavin had you under control, but you seemed safe, and he assured us Gavin wasn’t treating you like one of his playthings.”

  “I wouldn’t remember if he had,” I told them.

  “You’d feel it,” said Nathan. “You haven’t had Lugat blood, only his. Without Lugat blood, you’d know if he’d fucked you or beat you — or anything else.”

  I shook my head. “He watched the scene with you and I and Xaephan, and he beat off to it. He watched my sessions with Mordecai and came, too. He didn’t hurt me physically, but he raped my mind.” My eyes filled with moisture, but because I was pissed. “He can’t live.”

  “Abbott never intended to hand you over to Rinaldo,” said Nathan. “The plan was for us to draw him here and use you as bait. I didn’t approve, but I couldn’t find you.”

  “Nathan’s killed at least seventy of Abbott’s vampires in an effort to find out which lair you were being held,” said Aaron. “It’s safe to say Abbott and Nathan are at war, and might be even once we settle everything between the other supernaturals.”

  “I’m officially at war with him as well,” said Randall, and I saw the muscles of his jaw working. He wanted to kill the unconscious vampires as badly as me, but a fucking dragon was in our way.

  “Kendra’s in South Carolina making sure the vampires down there didn’t join forces with Rinaldo while he was in the States. This also took her out of the playbook for your captivity,” said Aaron. “She’s on a plane headed home so she can do what’s necessary to make sure these two aren’t true dead.” He looked at Nathan. “I’m sorry, old friend. They can’t die today.”

  Aaron gathered their body parts, put them into the limo Gavin and I’d arrived in, and drove away.

  I should be pissed at him, I told Cora, but if I’m honest, I’m a little relieved I didn’t kill them true. If it turns out they have to die because Gavin’s still in my head, will you help me?

  If you can’t do it because he’s still in your head, I’ll do it for you.

  I looked up to Nathan. “Cora and I have the beginnings of a plan. I need ya’ll to be prepared with a way to knock me out when Gavin and Abbott awaken, just in case he’s still in control and tries to make me hurt ya’ll.”

  “Bran’s not far away,” said Randall. “You’re hurt.”

  My head was killing me. The backlash when I’d cut Gavin in two had been awful, though I’d been riding the power of thousands of wolves and I’d ignored it. Now, I probably didn’t have long until I passed out.

  No sooner than I thought it, the world went black and I felt Nathan’s strong arms catch me on the way down.

  Chapter 29

  I awakened in Nathan’s bedroom, snuggled against the Lion King.

  Best I could tell, we were both naked. Or, when I moved my leg I fe
lt skin on skin, and I was betting he hadn’t put me in shorts.

  “I know you’re awake. How do you feel?”

  “Like ya’ll dribbled Bran’s blood in my mouth until you were sure I had enough to heal my brain. You don’t smell horny, but I’m pretty sure we’re both naked.”

  “I’m too worried about you for that, but yes, we’re naked because I’ve been giving you as much energy as I could, to try to build you back up without hurting you worse.”

  “Healing energy,” I corrected him. “You gave Bran’s blood a boost with it.”

  I could see the city lights below us, but there were no clocks. “What time is it? Is Lauren here? Is she okay?”

  “The sun will rise in perhaps two hours. Lauren’s been in to see you while you slept, though we didn’t let her see you while you were bloody. She felt your energy and is confident you’re okay, though I’m sure she’ll be happy to see you up and around. She’s sleeping at the moment. Gavin’s conscious though he isn’t whole again yet. Abbott is still unconscious. Kendra’s holding the territory for now — it appears she’s taken over the title of Second during the melee.” He sighed. “She wants you to call her when you’re up to it.”

  “Where’s Cora? I need to talk to you, Cora, and Randall, first. Not necessarily all together, unless everyone happens to be here, but I need a conversation with all three of you.” My turn to sigh. “Probably Aaron, too.”

  “My understanding of Abbott’s inner circle is that Abbott had access to Gavin’s control of you, which means Kendra has it now. She could be in your head through whatever means Gavin gained control.”

  It took a moment to sink deeply enough to look, but I immediately saw the leash still touching my willpower, though it was no longer strangling it. Without even thinking, I threw heat at it and watched it smoke and go away. It burned and hurt my brain but I didn’t give a fuck. Besides, I had Bran’s blood in me so it should heal. The only obvious connection left was the one Myrddin had set. I didn’t know if Gavin left it for political reasons or because he wasn’t capable of removing it, but I didn’t mess with it either.

  “What did you do?” Nathan asked, his voice cautious.

  He pulled me partway out, but I understood he’d smelled damage and needed to check in with me, so I didn’t complain.

  “Burned the connection Gavin set in my head. He put it in a few places and I only saw the one. I should probably meditate and look for the others while I still have Bran’s blood in me.”

  “What do you need from me?”

  “Just be quiet and be still. Don’t do anything to pull me out, even if you smell damage.”

  With just about anyone else, I’d have told them to let me have the room to myself, but I knew the cat could remain motionless for hours.

  “If I sense more damage than Bran’s blood can handle, I’ll check in with you.”

  “Thanks.” It’s good to have a lion watching your back.

  It took a while, but I found three more places Gavin had inserted himself in my head. I couldn’t be sure I had them all, but even with Bran’s blood, I wasn’t sure my head was up to more damage. I had to choose between burning or accepting a backlash. If someone gave you a choice of being snapped with a mile-long rubber band as it broke, or burned with a super-hot cigarette, which would you choose? I went back and forth between the two, but both fucking hurt.

  While I was in there, I found memories behind a curtain. It wasn’t real — meditation is all about symbolism, but I had to look behind the dense fabric. Even now, I wish I hadn’t. Gavin had let me in his head while he fed from me, and then blocked the memory. I’d felt the life fading from me, and he’d been in my head to take pleasure in my panic. I’d been paralyzed and couldn’t move, and I thought he was going to kill me. I’d felt myself going cold, felt as if there wasn’t enough oxygen to feed my outer extremities. They’d been cold and numb.

  Terror froze my veins and stilled my heart when I realized he’d given me his blood back after he’d nearly drained me. If they killed me, would I turn into a vampire?

  I didn’t have it in me to keep looking through my head, though I looked over the broken threads one last time, considering why he’d chosen those locations. How much had been Abbott’s orders, and how much had been Gavin’s choice? I wasn’t sure it mattered, but I was curious.

  When I came out of my meditation I realized my ears and nose had bled and Nathan hadn’t moved even to clean me.

  “Thanks for not pulling me out.”

  “The injury healed within about five minutes and the bleeding stopped. I wasn’t going to wait much longer though, because you seemed to be in distress towards the end even though you weren’t in physical danger.”

  Distress. Yeah. The memory of being taken so close to death was quite distressing. What had really bothered me was Gavin’s desire to watch the life force flow out of me and never come back. He really didn’t like me. I was only alive because Abbott didn’t want me dead.

  The sky was lightening, but I didn’t think the sun was officially up. I stood and walked to his ensuite bathroom. “What time is it?”

  “Six twenty. We have perhaps ten or fifteen minutes until sunrise, if you want to talk to Kendra.”

  I shook my head. “I’ll talk to her tonight. I need the day to figure out what to say to her.”

  He sighed. “Check your email.”

  I glared at him because I could tell by the way he said it, he already knew what’d been sent.

  “I know you can get back in if I change my password, so I’ll ask you to back out of it and stop watching, now that I’m safe.”

  He nodded. “I respect your privacy, but I needed to see what was going through your communication channels while you were missing.”

  “You understand I believe you, and that’s why we’re still kinda-sorta-maybe-an-item, right? If I thought you were looking all the time, we’d be done.”

  He nodded again. “I’m aware. Trust is as important to you as oxygen. I get it.”

  I went into the bathroom, used it, washed my face, and went into his closet for a t-shirt.

  “So save me the time and tell me what she sent,” I said when I came back into the room from his closet.

  “She’s in an impossible position but she doesn’t intend to abuse it. She’s loosened the leash around your willpower as much as possible without disconnecting it, because to do so would break her oath to her Master. She asked you not to break it while she was dead to the world, but said she understood it was your decision.”

  I grabbed my phone and called her. “How many connections did Gavin set in my head?”

  “Five.”

  “I cut four. I don’t suppose you can tell me where the fifth is?”

  “Abbott should rise when the sets returns tonight, but probably not before, as he normally does. Please give him an opportunity to answer your question or disconnect it. Should he refuse, I’ll find a way to get you the information — unless he kills me for being disloyal, which he very well may. Gavin might’ve taken me out already if he was certain he could, but I hold Abbott’s power until he returns, so Mister Dark-and-Angry doesn’t dare try.” She took a fast breath. “I don’t have long before the sun takes me. Please stay safe. I care about you.”

  “You’ve been stronger than Gavin all along, you just didn’t push the issue. You only did today because you needed to control the power to stay safe.”

  “Stay with your wolf and lion today. If you can bring Mordecai back, all the better. I don’t know what Rinaldo has up his sleeve, but he worries me.”

  “Thanks. Take care of yourself, too.”

  I disconnected and looked at Nathan. “There’s at least one connection I didn’t get, so you’ll all need to be careful around me when Abbott rises. I don’t know how much control over me it’ll give him.” My shoulders slumped when I remembered Rinaldo. “If the Babylonian asshole can force my thoughts from farther than two hundred miles away, you’ll need to be cautious of me all th
e time — unless you have spies who know which time zone he’s in.”

  “We’re pretty certain he’s on a plane headed back to Europe.”

  “Is Cora here?”

  He was silent a few beats before saying, “I just asked RaeLynn to send her to my room.”

  I fast-stepped to the door and hugged her the instant she made it to me. Her arms around me felt like home. Security.

  “I didn’t have a chance to check on you last night,” I told her. “I was so worried Gavin had hurt you bad!”

  “He did, but Randall took care of me.”

  “Please tell me Tyler’s okay?”

  “Gavin just put him to sleep. No damage, no harm. The asshole hit me hard to make sure you couldn’t pull on the wolves through me.”

  Our arms were still around each other, and I felt the wolf Alpha through her.

  “I owe Randall big time, don’t I?”

  Cora looked at Nathan, then back to me. “About that…”

  We stopped hugging and I stepped into the room. Cora closed the door and asked Nathan, “We’re secure? Soundproof room, no listening devices?”

  “We are.”

  “Randall didn’t give us the power of the Alpha. I took it. I don’t want to be Alpha and he knows it, but if I challenged him, there isn’t a doubt in my mind I’d win.”

  I looked at Nathan and back to Cora. “Then your life depends upon convincing him you don’t want his job, and that you won’t pull on his power like that again unless there’s absolutely no choice.”

  “Most Alphas would kill me no matter my intentions, but Randall’s smart enough to know it’s good to have me watching his back.” She looked at Nathan and back to me again. “We’ve talked. He isn’t happy, but I don’t believe he intends to take me out.”

  “Randall’s capitalizing on the fact you stood up to the Strigorii because you had the power of his wolves flowing through you,” Nathan told me, his voice grim. “Which is also why you aren’t in hot water with the Concilio. I’m officially at war with Abbott and his people, as is Randall. Martin took Abbott’s side to spite me, but the rest of the predatory shifter groups are sticking with me.” He sighed. “Bran and Aaron are attempting to remain neutral.”