Edge of Grey

by Phelps, J. C.

  Edge of Grey

  Book Six of the Alexis Stanton Chronicles

  by

  J.C. Phelps

  EBOOK EDITION

  PUBLISHED BY:

  J.C. Phelps

  Edge of Grey

  Copyright © 2015 by J.C. Phelps

  Cover design, interior formatting and layouts by Terry Roy

  All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above

  This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return to the retailer of your choice and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the author’s work.

  Written for

  Alexandra

  Edy

  Ellie

  Jim

  Rick

  Robert

  &

  Robert

  Special thanks to

  Bad Ass Bethy — Caroline — Crystal — Jennifer — Jimmy — John — Linda — Lynn — Mac — Terry — Val

  Thank you to all of my early readers, alpha, beta, and editors. You all don’t know how important you are to my process. An extra thank you to Caroline for all the kicks to the butt so I kept moving forward with enthusiasm.

  For my Ranger friend: As always, I will never forget what you mean to me and my family and want to thank you just for being who you are and never forgetting us either.

  I would also like to thank all my readers. You have all been so very good to me and your support means the world.

  I’d like to express an extra hearty thank you to Caroline, Linda, and Terry. THANK YOU!

  Table of Contents

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Chapter One

  JOLTED AWAKE BY MY VIBRATING phone, I broke out in a cold sweat. This phone should be inactive. It was nothing more than a security blanket. Or so I thought.

  Maybe the battery was dying, and the vibrating was just an alert.

  I fumbled for the phone in my back pants pocket. I’d been sleeping in my clothes for months now. After being ousted as Penumbra, I’d been on edge. The feelings of doubt, distrust, and apprehension became more intense with every passing day at Mesa. It hadn’t been long since my partners told me of White’s death, but not knowing what happened to him made me even worse. I didn’t trust anyone.

  I knew I couldn’t trust Posner or Eric and still had some reservations about Joe. Even Jake had been distant since we'd returned from South America. Jake had been trying to use me to ferry information so White and Associates could use their influence to shut down Mesa and get rid of Posner. Then Jake would take over Mesa. I assumed his coolness toward me was because my value had decreased after White died. I could tell he was no longer convinced I’d be able to help him.

  Again the phone vibrated in my back pocket. I struggled to roll over on the bed to pull it out.

  In my haste, I rolled off the bed and ended up face first on the floor still wondering if I’d imagined it. This was my private line for just me and White, and he was— No one else should have this number.

  My stomach churned and my heart wanted to leap for joy. I suppressed it all and tried to calm my shaking with a deep breath.

  The phone vibrated again as I stood up. This time I had it in my hands. It was White and Associate’s office number.

  “Hello?” I said shakily into the phone.

  “Grey?”

  It was Green on the other end.

  “How did you get this number?”

  My brain was reeling. The hope that White was on the other end had my energy levels at a high but hearing Green’s voice popped my bubble. I was instantly more tired than I'd ever been in my life. Not to mention shaken. Add in the fact that I’d been trying to get in contact with Green for more than a week, and I was thoroughly flustered.

  The last time I’d talked to Green was at our lunch meeting right after finding out White had been killed. He’d refused all my calls in the following week. Gabriella had answered my first call and was distant and abrupt when she told me no one was available to take my calls and then—nothing. They just quit answering the phone when I called. Gabriella didn’t even answer her home phone and neither did my parents.

  I’d hoped everyone was just busy but knew there was something else going on. Maybe I’d finally get an explanation now.

  “I know this is the private phone number you shared with White, but I figured it might be the best way to get in contact with you,” he said.

  I didn’t have a response before he started talking again.

  “I’m only calling to let you know that we will no longer be taking your calls at the office or anywhere else. We’ve got the White situation under control, and when an arrest is made, we’ll be sure to let you know.”

  “An arrest?”

  I was confused and drained. They didn’t make arrests. Did they find out what happened? Was someone going to be extradited? White, according to my father, had been killed abroad.

  “What happened? Who killed White?”

  “We still aren’t sure what happened,” he said.

  “Then what are you talking about? Are you dropping the investigation?” I asked.

  “No. But, we can handle it. We don’t need you to stick your neck out any longer. I promise, when we get this figured out, we’ll let you know.”

  “I’m sorry, Green. I’m confused. What’s going on?” I shook my head, trying to absorb what all this meant.

  “It’s quite clear, Alex. We don’t need you right now.”

  “Why are you cutting me out of this? I’ve been trying to get in touch for more than a week and no one is answering my calls, not even the Admiral.”

  “Alex.”

  He sighed.

  “You work for Mesa now. We will not work with Mesa in any capacity, and I’m sure the Admiral feels the same way.”

  “What? I’m freelance,” I practically yelled into the phone.

  They couldn’t keep me out of the loop on this one.

  “Freelance? I don’t think so. You’re living in the lodge; you’re spending all your time with Mesa employees. You are doing work strictly for Mesa and have been for some time now. This was not an easy decision, but we’ve all discussed it. You’re out.”

  “Out?”

  Now I was yelling.

  “Sorry, Alex,” he said.

 
; I started to yell into the phone again, but he’d already disconnected.

  I felt alone before the phone call, but now I felt worse than alone. I felt unwanted, and rightfully so. That’s exactly what I was. Unwanted.

  My shock was just as strong as the moment I’d found out White had been killed, but the flush that coursed over me was the exact opposite of the draining of blood I’d experienced when I found out White was dead. Instead of losing my footing I lost my temper.

  How could they do this to me? They knew how much White meant to me. I guess the girlfriend didn’t matter when it came to the band of brothers. That was one of the reasons I wanted to keep our outside relationship quiet. I’d accepted the fact that I’d never be one of the guys over there, but I thought they’d respect the relationships I had with each of them.

  I stopped short when I realized what I was about to throw against the wall. Though the phone had just been the instrument of my latest kick to the teeth, it was still the only thing I had left with any direct connection to White. I just couldn’t do it. My inability to throw something doused the flames, so I stuck the phone back into my pants pocket and dropped heavily onto the bed.

  Why did he have to call me at three in the morning when I wasn’t awake enough to argue or ask the right questions? That’s probably exactly why he called me at this time of the morning, to catch me off guard.

  I sat on the bed with my head in my hands for only a couple of seconds before I pulled the phone out again and redialed the office’s phone number. He couldn’t do this to me. I wouldn’t be cut out. Not with this.

  The phone rang and rang. He wasn’t picking up.

  Red.

  He had to be why this was happening. I hung up. Green wasn’t going to answer, but Red might. I dialed his number using White’s phone.

  “Hello?”

  Red’s voice was dry and disjointed. It was obvious I woke him up.

  “Red,” I spat out. “This is Alex. Why are you cutting me out of the search for White’s killer?”

  “Alex?”

  He was still getting his bearings.

  “Hi,” he said, still sounding a bit confused. “Green must have finally called you?”

  “Yes, he did. Why did you make him cut me out?”

  My anger was bubbling over. If this conversation was face to face instead of through the phone there would be no talking involved, just choking, punching, scratching, and maybe some spitting.

  “Alex,” he said in a soothing tone. “I know you blame me for all of this and that’s okay—”

  “Cut the psychological bullshit. Why did you cut me out?”

  “As I was saying,” he said, resuming his fake soothing tone, “it was a unanimous decision. We all agreed it was best if you did your thing and we did ours. You’ve been doing your own thing for months now, anyway.”

  His last statement sounded more than a little smug.

  “Only because you forced me into solitary! I left to protect you and your thanks? You get White killed and then you make sure I’m no longer welcome. You better hope we never cross paths again.”

  I hung up on him.

  Unanimous decision? All of my partners felt this way? I dialed Black’s number.

  He answered immediately.

  “Yes?”

  Unlike Red, he didn’t sound like he’d just woke up.

  “Black? I have to know. Is it true that you all decided to put me on the outside of the White investigation?”

  “Yes, it’s true.” His voice held regret.

  “Why?”

  My voice cracked as I asked this. Getting confirmation from Black was not easy, it was painful.

  “It’s just not the place for you right now,” he said.

  “The hell it isn’t.”

  The sorrow was immediately pushed down by my anger.

  “No. It’s not.” His voice was firm.

  “Why are you doing this?”

  “You work for Mesa.”

  The disgusted emphasis on the word Mesa felt like a personal insult. So what if I worked for Mesa? I also worked for White and Associates, at least I had in the past. Posner had been a bigger man and allowed me to prove myself, even though I’d worked for his rivals. Now my partners were going to use this as their excuse to drop me? I will admit Mesa did do some unscrupulous jobs, but in this case, they were the better men. They didn’t throw me out because I’d had dealings with their rival company but brought me in and kept me busy. And, if you wanted to get technical, I was freelance. I worked for no one exclusively. I’d hoped to go back to White and Associates. A lump formed in my throat and I forced myself to swallow it.

  “I’d hoped to work with you again, at some point,” I said.

  I wanted him to reassure me this was just a temporary situation.

  Tell me that we will work together again one day, just not right now. I willed the thought through the phone.

  “I’d hoped that as well. I’m sorry things didn’t turn out that way. Take care of yourself,” he said.

  What?

  I dropped the phone when he hung up. I stood next to my bed, not able to move for at least five minutes.

  I took in a deep breath and glanced at the glowing red numbers on the alarm clock. Three twenty-seven in the morning. I sat down hard before I passed out.

  Was anything ever going to be okay again? It was bad enough I’d lost White, but now I’d just lost my partners. I stood up and paced.

  Once again I retraced my steps since Red and Green had spilled my secret. This was something I did several times a day. I revisited this after I found out White had been killed and knew I would have changed things, but only to spend time with him, not because I thought I’d done anything wrong. Now there were new factors to consider again.

  Other than lamenting time lost with White I always came up with the same conclusion. I did what I did because my only other choice had been to give up and go into hiding. I couldn’t do that. But maybe I should.

  Before today, I’d always had the possibility of returning to my old life, if I could just figure out how to do it. Now, it seemed as if my old life was through with me. All opportunities, if there even had been any, were exhausted. I was truly on my own.

  Maybe it was time to throw in the towel, clean out my bank accounts and find a quiet island to die on. Somewhere there were no other people. Nothing but me, a beach and maybe a coconut tree so I wouldn’t starve.

  Over the past several months, my mind always wandered to one person when I was feeling the pressure, and that's where it went now. I still had Jake. Even if he’d been distant, he wasn’t kicking me out of the lodge. He’d spent this entire last week working out with me, keeping me busy until I heard something back from my partners. Or ex-partners as it is now.

  Jake’s motivations were clear, he was on this planet to do what he wanted and I knew he’d use anyone he could to get what he wanted. Still, he was all I had right now. I’d have to push down my bitter feelings that had arisen when I figured out Jake was completely self-serving. The moment we’d shared in my hotel room before the South American job had been for his pleasure and not for us. I was thankful it hadn’t gone far. I wasn't ready to deal in the short term when it came to physical relationships, yet. I was learning that nothing was forever. At least nothing that included more than one person. The love I felt for White would be forever, but that was solely mine to carry. No one shared in that with me because White was gone.

  A phone call from White had killed my passion fueled encounter with Jake that night in my hotel room. It made me wonder about destiny and fate. That had been one of the last times I spoke with White and I would never have forgiven myself had I spent the night with Jake so soon before White’s death. Forever, in the sense of relationships, love, and happiness, was gone. I knew my only chance at forever had died with White. The world was full of ruthlessness and full of individuals. Rarely did someone find that one person who melded perfectly with themselves. The rending of that bond wa
s devastating and I’d found it ripped away parts of yourself that you didn’t realize you could lose. It was an excruciating lesson to learn, but I was slowly acclimating to the harsh weather of my new world.

  Once the sun was lighting my room, I marched down to Jake’s door and knocked with purpose.

  Jake was wearing nothing but his blue boxer shorts. I’d almost become immune to the toned bodies around me. Jake, however, gave me a small thrill whenever I saw him partially clothed. My mind brought me right back to the heated moment in my hotel room when I almost made a big mistake. Now it wouldn't be a mistake, just passing time and doing what everyone else did. Trying to find a way to forget and feel wanted. I ached for some kind of physical contact to feel connected again. Still, I couldn’t get past the fact that it would be nothing more than sex. I needed more time to stop mourning my loss of forever before I could throw myself into the temporary.

  I shook off the thrill as Jake said, “Everything okay?”

  “I have to get back to work.”

  If I didn’t keep busy, I was just going to worry myself to death about my partners and what I could have done differently. More than an hour and a half of pacing in my room had done a lot to clear my mind. Jake would give me work or I’d have to leave. For good.

  “It’s early, Alex. Can we talk later?”

  “No. We can’t. You have until the end of the day to find me a job or I’m gone.”

  “Please come inside,” he said.

  I accepted his invitation and slid past him.

  He shut the door and asked, “What’s going on?”

  I was pacing again.

  “Green called,” I said.

  “Did he find out something about White?”

  “Not that I know of. I’ve been blacklisted,” I said.

  “What?”

  The jolt of amusement I heard in his voice made me look up from my feet to study his face.

  “You find this funny?” I asked and he immediately dropped the grin.

  “Well, no. But—”

  “But what, Jake? But what? I’ve been cut off from…” I almost addressed them as my partners, but I knew that wouldn't be appropriate. I’d been telling Jake that these men were in my past and if that were true, then I shouldn’t be so upset. “…cut off from possible future jobs.”