Backstage

by Mandy Bee

  “I don’t think Chris would like that, I mean I haven’t seen him in three weeks. Plus I came here to be with my whole family, because I missed all of you.” I can see the hurt on his face.

  “Well I guess we should get back out there.” He says releasing me.

  “Can you do something for me tonight?” I ask while stopping him from opening the door. He nods at me “Can you stay with me back here tonight?” His answer came in the form of a kiss.

  Tonight I want to dress up, I want to make sure I look really nice. I have promised all of them that I would stand by the stage and cheer them on. What they don’t know is that I now know every song they have ever sung by heart. Yup, I’m now a Freak Street fan, but can you blame me? When I was at home I would play their albums over and over again. Then I found myself singing the songs while cooking or while in the shower, I got hooked.

  I was putting my hair up when I heard Chris yell that they were heading over for sound check, I told him I would be there in a few minutes. I look in the mirror to check my outfit. I’m wearing a black wrap dress that has a white trim at the bottom and a white belt. My hair is up in a clip, just how I like it. I’m wearing my Tiffany butterfly necklace and Rachael’s pearl earrings. I know they don’t really match but I had to wear both of them tonight. A pair of white sandals and some clear lip gloss and I’m ready.

  Tom is waiting for me when I walk off the bus. He walks me all the way to the stage then hugs me before leaving. I stand there and watch the men I love do what they do best. Justin is in the middle of their first number one hit, I watch him dance around the stage. He is using the microphone his mother and I got him, I can tell right then that I’m going to need a box of tissues to help get me through tonight’s show.

  The Paris show is almost over and I have only cried twice, both times were during a slow song. I watch Justin as he works the stage, he is amazing. He looks so alive out there, you can see how much he really loves his music.

  Right before the last song I saw something pink hit the stage. It’s not far from me, but I can’t make out what it is. I tiptoe closer and stretch my neck, holy shit it’s a thong! Now I have been with this band for a while now and never have I heard about any underwear on stage! Gross!! Dave is the closest to me and the closest to the nasty underwear, he sees me staring at it.

  “Hey Justin!” Dave screams into his mic. Justin turns around and looks at Dave like he is crazy for stopping the show. Dave goes and picks up the pink thong, smiling the whole time. Justin walks over to him.

  “What do we have here?” He laughs when he see it.

  “We have a little pink thong,” Dave says and the crowd starts screaming louder. “but I know someone who isn’t happy about this.” He glance over at me, then Justin looks at me.

  “Hmm, this is a problem now isn’t, whatever shell we do?” He is mocking me with his tone of voice! The crowd just keeps screaming, I don’t think they know what is really going on. “How about we let that someone come tell us what she thinks we should do with this.” He points to the thong that Dave is still holding. Then waves at me to come on stage.

  If he wants to try and make fun of me then I’ll give his fans a show they will never forget. I straighten my dress and walk out on stage smiling. I look over at Chris who is smirking at me, I flip him off and keep walking. I walk up to Dave and Justin with a look on my face that tells them to watch out.

  “I think you all remember the lovely Miss Flower.” Justin says to the crowd, they once again scream. Really can’t they do anything else?

  “Hello boys.” I say taking Dave’s mic from him.

  “Miss Flower, now what do you think we should do with this gift that has been thrown on stage?” If he keeps using that mocking tone with me I’m going to go off on him.

  Then I get an idea. I know Dave keeps a lighter in his back pocket at all times, even though he bums all his cigarettes from the roadies. I reach in his pocket and take the lighter, he jumps because he didn’t know what I was doing. I grab the underwear and hold it up and set it on fire! The guys are laughing their asses off while the crowd is screaming and taking pictures. I stomp the fire out after a minute or two and wait for the boys to say something.

  Dave just hugs me, he is covered in sweat but I let him hug me anyways. I look over at Chris and Scot and they are still laughing. Peter is still playing bass guitar for the band, he is smiling but doesn’t seem to get the joke. I roll my eyes at him.

  “Well, I guess you have a problem with women tossing their pretty little thongs at your boys!” Justin laughs as he walks up to stand right in front of me.

  “I guess so.” I say into Dave’s mic before handing it back to him along with his lighter. Justin takes my hand and intertwines our fingers, a sweet calm washes over me.

  “Will you stay out here with us for our last song?” I wince when the crowd got louder then before. But I nod and walk to the front of the stage with him.

  Their last song is always “I Dream Of” it’s a high tempo dance song. When the music starts Justin starts dancing and singing. At first I just stand there and laugh at him but then he pulls on my hand and spins me around. Before I know it I’m dancing with him all over the stage. As the song ends he pulls me close and sings the last line to me.

  I dream of starting my life with you.

  Then he kisses me and dips me backwards! Walking off the stage the fans scream for more, he picks me up and spins me around. Then Chris, Scot, and Dave do the same thing and when my feet finally hit the floor I’m so dizzy that I have to use the wall to help me stand up.

  “You were amazing!” Chris says while taking my hand and leading me to their dressing room.

  “It was fun!” I giggle.

  “You know it is going to be all over Facebook, Twitter and YouTube right?” Justin asks me while handing me a bottle of water.

  “Yeah I know, but I don’t care. When I saw that thong it grossed me out! Then Dave had to go make a big deal out of it!” I toss a towel at him.

  “Hey! Justin is the one who made you come on stage!” He blocks the towel with his arm.

  “I didn’t think she would do it!” He laughs.

  “Well, I did do it, and I had fun doing it!” I’m very proud of myself.

  When we get back to the bus I’m still hyper. Justin goes to take a shower while the others go straight to bed. I head back to my room to change. Tonight was so great, and now I get to wait for Justin to come to bed with me. I had just turned on the TV when he walks in, he shuts the door and locks it. Then without saying one word he slides into the bed beside me and pulls me into a hot passionate kiss.

  His lips are soft, his tongue licks my bottom lip and I moan opening my mouth. He enters and our tongues start to dance. My hands are in his hair and his are on my back holding me to him. I pull him down on top of me and we start rocking our bodies against each other. I run my hands up and down his back. He grabs my hair and angles my face to make the kiss more hungry and hard. But all of a sudden he pushes away from me.

  “Not here” he whispers as he stares down on me. He pulls the covers over us and I lay my head on his chest and try to calm my breathing. He knows I would have gone all the way with him tonight, but I understand why he stopped. Our first time shouldn’t be on the bus, well at least not with the others here too.

  When I open my eyes I see that my head is on Justin’s chest. His arms are around me holding me to him, the same way a child would hold a teddy bear. I push myself up so I can look down at him, my sleeping angel. I gently kiss him then climb over him and head to the bathroom. I see Chris sitting on one of the couches drinking coffee.

  “Morning!” I sing the word before walking into the bathroom.

  “I need to talk to you.” Chris yells through the door. As I walk back up front I see he has made me a cup of coffee too.

  “What’s up?” I ask while sitting down across from him.

  “Okay, umm how much do you love me?” He bites his lip and watches me. />
  “What do you want Chris?” I cock an eye brow at him.

  “We have tickets to see Coldplay in London….tonight”

  “So all of you are flying to London?” My heart starts to ache, this isn’t right!

  “No, not all of us. Justin didn’t want to go, he said he was planning a trip or something”

  “Yeah that trip got canceled, he was flying home to surprise me. So we would have the bus to ourselves for how long?” I’m starting to like this idea.

  “The concert is tonight, but Dave has family there that he didn’t get to see a few weeks ago. He has invited us to stay at their farm. We were going to fly into Italy the day of the show.”

  “Are you asking for my permission or something?” I giggle at him.

  “Well you did fly out here because you missed all of us and now here we are leaving you. I promise this was a last minute decision, I didn’t know until last night about the tickets and then Dave told us about visiting his family and all that.” He is talking a mile a minute, all I can do is smile.

  “Then I guess I’ll just have to stay on tour for a little while longer so you guys can make it up to me.”

  “What? You would really stay?” He is shocked but grinning.

  “Yeah, I don’t know how long I will be able to stay but I can call Tammy and have her send me the rest of my suitcases.” His puzzled look makes me explain “She thought it would be a good idea to pack everything, then if I decided to stay she would send everything else and if I came home she would help me unpack. I hate to say it but she is not all that bad.”

  “I don’t want to talk about her right now, but I’ll call her and have her ship your things to the next stop.” He comes and gives me a hug. “Welcome back sis.” He grabs his phone from the table and walks off the bus leaving me there totally confused.

  Since the boys are going to be leaving for London today, we thought it would be nice to have lunch together and then just hang out until they had to go to the airport. Justin sent one of the bodyguards to go get some pizza because we had to hide the buses. The fans over here won’t stop till they find you, unlike the American fans that give up more easily. So instead of being able to have food delivered to the buses, like we have done in the past, a bodyguard has to go get it for us.

  As we eat the boys tell me about everything I have missed out on, not like they didn’t tell me this stuff on the phone but whatever. I confessed to becoming a Freak Street fan and I think Chris may have chocked on his pizza. I told them about listening to the albums at home and then finding myself singing the words without the music. Justin said it was me missing him, but quickly corrected himself by saying I was missing them.

  “You going to be okay?” Chris asks me as we stand in front of the airport.

  “I’ll be fine, go have fun!” I kiss him on the cheek.

  “Call me tomorrow, love you!” He says as he starts over to where Dave and Scot are waiting on him. I wave at them.

  “Be good! And bring me a present!” I giggle and walk back over to the car. The driver has the door already open and I slide right in.

  JUSTIN DIDN’T COME with us to the airport, he said he had some phone calls to make. As the car pulls away from the airport I watch out my window at everything around me. I’m in Paris! I have no clue what street we are on, I don’t know the names to any of the famous buildings. All I know is that I’m in the city of love, with Justin.

  Good old Tom is standing by the door of the bus when the car pulls up beside it. I jump out before the driver can get out, he gives me a nasty look but I can’t wait to see Justin. Tom holds the door open for me and I run at full speed onto the bus. I can hear music coming from my room. I open the door and he sits up and smiles at me. I slip off my shoes and climb into bed with him.

  “What are we going to do for four whole days?” I ask while he pulls me into his arms. I lay my head on his chest and close my eyes. I could lay like this for four days and be happy with that.

  “How would you like to rent a cabin for a few days? Maybe find one that is not too far from our next stop?” His hands are roaming all over my back and he expects me to think clearly right now?

  “A cabin could be fun, who can you call to find one?” I wiggle a little trying to hint to him to stop, it worked for all of two seconds.

  He picks up his phone and calls the tour manager, who then books us a two bedroom cabin that is only an hour away from the next show. After that he called his mom to let her know, she asked if she could talk to me.

  “Hi” I say softly. Rachael and I have texted a few times since I left the tour but she didn’t know I was flying out here.

  “Hi sweetheart, how are you?” She sounds so cheerful.

  “I’m good, how have you been?” I’m hoping a little small talk is all I’ll have to do. I’m not sure what to say to the mother of the man that I love, and the man that I left.

  “I’ve been good. I was surprised though when Justin called and told me about you returning to the tour…..” Is she asking a question or hunting for answers?

  “Yeah, I told Chris not to tell anyone. I wanted to surprised everyone, I missed my family. But I’m not sure about returning to the tour, right now I’m just visiting.” Why is she making me so nervous?

  “I see, I guess he is just saying what he wants to happen instead of what is happening.” She grunts like she is upset. I stand up and walk to the front of the bus leaving him in the bedroom.

  “Rachael, I’m sorry. Look I’m not sure how long I’m staying, I want to stay and end the tour with them but I don’t know if I can. I just missed them so much, I had to see them.” I flop down on the couch and lean my head back.

  “Oh, don’t be sorry, I know you missed them, and I’m glad you’re visiting them. And if you do come home early maybe I’ll fly down to see you, maybe go shopping again.” She laughs, then I found myself laughing with her.

  “I would like that.” I said after we both calm down.

  “I would too, but you are coming to our house for Christmas and I will not take no for an answer.” What? Christmas at Justin’s?

  “Well I would have to talk to Chris about that first.” My voice cracks.

  “Don’t worry about that, the whole band always comes to our house for Christmas. But right now just have fun on tour, and call me if you come home early.” We say goodbye and I just sit there.

  Thanksgiving is only two weeks after the tour ends, so that means Christmas is only four or five weeks after that. Thanksgiving has never been a big deal with me and Chris. I would cook a nice dinner then he would watch football while I either read or cross stitched. But Christmas is something else for us. We still give each other gifts but we don’t decorate, we don’t go to parties, we just hide from the world. Christmas was our family’s favorite holiday. I can remember mom and dad stringing lights on the tree, the house, the bushes, and even the mail box! Dad would put me on his shoulders and let me put the star on top of the tree. We had a normal life, a normal family, where we did normal holiday stuff.

  I’m still sitting on the couch thinking about all this when Justin comes looking for me. I have my eyes closed but a few tears are rolling down my cheek. I feel him sit down beside me and pull me into his lap.

  “Hey, what happened?” He asked while rocking me slowly.

  “Nothing, I’m sorry I was just thinking about some stuff.” I wipe my face with the back of my hand.

  “Did my mom say something?” He is worried. I cup his cheek in my hand then run my fingers through his hair.

  “Not really. She said if I came home early that she would fly down and we could go shopping.” I rest my head on his shoulder.

  “And you don’t want her too?” His confusion makes me laugh.

  “I would love for her to come down and see me. But she also talked about how the band always goes to your house for Christmas……”

  “We’ve been doing that since the band started. It’s easier for everyone. We have enough rooms
for everyone and I have my own little ‘guest house’ in the back.” He smoothes my hair with his hands.

  “Chris and I don’t do a lot for the holidays, it’s not an easy time for us.”

  “I can understand that, but this year will be different. You have a family now honey, and I promise this will be the best Christmas ever.” He hugs me tighter. I don’t think I want to deal with this anymore.

  After all the holiday talk Justin told me that the cabin is booked and waiting on us. The bus will be pulling out in about a half hour, the other buses left this morning. He is having some food delivered to the cabin so we can cook and not have to eat out all the time. It will take us about eight hours to get there, so we should arrive right about midnight. We are staying until the day of the show and then meeting the boys at the arena before sound check.

  I OPEN MY eyes and I feel the sun coming through the window. I sit up and wince, I’m sore all over. Then the memories from last night come flowing back. All Justin said, all that Justin did, all that we did! It was so romantic. He had rose petals on the bed, on the floor of the bedroom, and in the bathroom there was a hot bath ready for us. It was amazing, he was amazing.

  He made me feel things I didn’t know were real, and then after he held me close and told me how wonderful I was. It was like something out of a Lifetime movie. I lay back down and stretch, I don’t know how long this soreness will last but to be honest I don’t mind it one bit.

  I get up and slip on my robe before heading to the kitchen. Justin is at the kitchen table working on his computer when I walk in and immediately he gets up and walks up to me.

  “Hey, how you feeling today?” He asked kissing my cheek and giving me a big hug.

  “Sore, but a good sore.” I wink at him then head over to the coffee pot.

  “Well what do you want to do today? There are some nice shops close by, and there is a private beach about twenty minutes away.” He says going back to the table and typing on his computer.