Burning Bridges

by Nadege Richards

  Adamo arched his brows and looked at me quizzically. “Someone’s thinking. Which is new, because I didn’t think your puny brain was capable.”

  I glared at him and sighed. “Funny. Really, that was the most hilarious joke I’ve ever heard in my life.” I shook my head and ran my fingers over the immaculate, smooth glass of heart. Echo’s face came to mind and I smiled.

  “Seriously, why are you so thoughtful all of a sudden?” Adamo murmured, laughing silently. He took a long swig of his drink and tossed the rest in a bush at the side of the house.

  “Let’s just say, my ignorant friend, that I have something to live for now.” I tucked the necklace into my pocket and breathed in deeply as if I could smell her, feel her on my skin. Every second away from her was another second of weakness for me. Seconds stretched into minutes, minutes into hours, and before long I found myself craving her. It wasn’t just her lips or her smile anymore, or even the way she drove me nuts. It was the way I felt around her—total serenity. She had a way of making me come undone with a simple giggle, and I swore if I had the time in my day I’d sing to her forever until forever wasn’t enough.

  Fear had gripped me by the throat just seconds before I had kissed her. I thought about the King, her betrothed, my family, and her most of all. But my entire life was spent pleasing everyone else, making sure I didn’t disappoint and that everyone was taken care of. Where did I come into play? It was a childish thought, but my happiness was important to me and, hell, if I was happy with Echo, every smile on my lips, every laugh, and every tear would be because of her. Hilarious to say, it was her that made me realize there was more to me than where I grew up.

  “Oh, really? What is this thing you are now living for, may I ask?” Adamo said, breaking me from my thoughts. He sat in the rocker across from me with his elbows on his knees. His eyes watched me with interest.

  Sighing, I said, “I need to see her.”

  “That doesn’t answer the question, but,” Adamo glanced at me with a crooked grin, “who is she?”

  “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

  “Try me. Is it Feven?” he asked.

  My eyes flashed to him and I snarled, “I’d rather not talk about her. She’s gone and hopefully for good. I’m tired of being her damn sitter.”

  “So, then who is it?”

  I paused, and then whispered, “The Princess.”

  Adamo choked on his own saliva. “The Princess? As in the Princess of the country? You’re kidding, aren’t you?”

  I shook my head with a grimace. “I wish I was. There’s something about her, Adamo. If you met her, you would understand me when I say I would do anything for that girl.”

  “Girl, Ayden. She’s a girl! And a Princess! Are you trying to get yourself killed?” he yelled, laughing hysterically.

  “Would it be such a bad thing? To die happy, I mean.” I shrugged and looked away from him.

  In the yard I espied two children playing behind a tree. They looked completely unfamiliar, but for a second the boy looked like me, young and carefree, and the little girl looked like the girl from the picture I’d taken from the Queen. I smiled briefly, only to realize that it was Echo my mind had conjured. Her smile, no doubt, was the same. Her hair, though Echo had now cut it, was still dark and unruly against her olive skin. I stared at the kids long and hard, and cursed. Why did Echo look so much like a Hunter? Was the Queen hiding something?

  “You’re serious about this,” Adamo said. He smiled and shook his head. “Where the hell did I go wrong, Ayd?”

  “It’s more like I went right, Adamo.”

  “How’d it happen?” he questioned.

  “Honestly?” My foot tapped against the wood paneling as I thought. “I don’t know. She somehow snuck up on me. And she can drive any man insane, I promise you. She’s hardheaded and self-willed. Really, it’s impossible to reason with her. But that’s what’s so strange about her, she challenges you. She’s not the usual easy catch.”

  “Snuck up on you, huh?” Adamo went into a fit of laughter, slapping his knees and really going at it. It should have angered me, as it would’ve five weeks ago, but it barely stroked a nerve. “If I didn’t know any better, I would say you’re a damn fool in love!” Adamo snorted again and wiped tears from his eyes. When I didn’t make any intentions to shut him up, his face became serious. “No. Ayden, you can’t be serious!”

  I stood from the rocker and squinted in the light of the sun. Adamo’s shack of a house stood behind me, nobody home but his sister who’d recently birthed two children without a father. Cicadas sounded in the forest and their shrill sounds told the coming of fall. I looked down at Adamo and shrugged. “I may be a damn fool, but I’m a happy damn fool.” I smiled and walked down his crooked steps and started walking the ways to the border.

  “Where are you going?” he asked. Adamo strolled up beside me and waved a hand in my face. “You’re leaving. At least see Giovanni, eh? When was the last time you spoke to him? Maybe he can knock some of this crazy out of your head. Too much time in the heat, I take it.”

  I stopped walking and glanced around the small district. It took me a moment to realize the kids had disappeared, as if my mind had made them up after all. As I glanced back at Adamo, something in the house next to his caught my eye. A man, well hidden in the dark shadows of his home, stood watching me by the window. He didn’t look angry, but frightened. Before I could register where I’d possibly seen him before, he disappeared.

  “Giovanni. Now. Can we go?” Adamo bewailed.

  “Who lives in this home?” I asked, ignoring his question.

  He swung around and took note of the old house. “Oh, that’s Conroy’s place. Cool guy, but kind of weird.”

  “What do you mean? What happened?”

  Adamo shrugged solemnly. “He, uh, lost his daughter to the King when she was four. That’s all he tells me.”

  “And the wife?” I glanced around the veranda and noticed the old toys and rag dolls. How long had it been?

  “No wife, but a lover, I presume. She was taken, too.” Adamo shook his head and scratched his neck. “Look, can we go? I’d rather not talk about the man’s misfortune right outside his door.”

  “Yeah. Okay.” I shook it off and continued walking. I said nothing more about the man and Adamo refused to bring it up. Everyone had their own stories here in Old Haven, some graver than others. You gave them the respect by not talking about it, but you couldn’t help but wonder.

  “Gio’s been asking for you,” Adamo said suddenly.

  “Has he? Good, let him keep asking. I’m not going to see him.”

  “Really? And this is coming from the man who worshipped the very ground he walked on? Come on, Ayd, the man taught you how to fight! You would be dead without him.”

  I sighed and stopped walking again. “Fine. But you say one word about the Princess and I’ll wring your neck.” I glanced down the road at his house. “And you really should be home helping your sister.”

  “Anny can take care of herself, trust me. And I wouldn’t dare say a thing about your Princess lover, dearest.” Adamo laughed.

  “She’s not my lover.”

  “Yet.”

  “Shut up,” I retorted.

  “Woman lover.”

  I sighed and followed Adamo down the dusty roads, the man and his lost family on my mind.

  GIOVANNI’S place was no bigger than Adamo’s house. Seeing as I’d left nearly four years ago, I’d forgotten how small it truly was. I’d meant to stop by for a visit the day I worked with Miss Othman, but I would think it safe to say that after the way things were left here, nothing was the same, people weren’t the same.

  Adamo and I climbed the veranda stairs and he knocked on the door. Seconds passed with no answer. “Maybe they’re around back.” Adamo led the way to the back of the house and I could hear grunting and the sound of wood slamming against wood as we drew nearer. It brought back memories—memories both good and bad.
Carriage wheels, old mats, slabs of wood, and garbage can lids lay strewn in the yard, the only practice equipment we found that came free of charge.

  “Hey!” Adamo yelled out. There were two guys on the ground wrestling by the fence, their arms around each other’s necks and faces red from exertion. They untangled from each other and stood to greet Adamo. I recognized them as Ciprean and Kale, neighborhood thieves.

  “Ad! Long time, no see!” Kale—short, spiky hair and thin like a lamppost—hugged Adamo and thumped him on the head. He then looked at me and froze.

  Ciprean stood just behind them and a slow smile played on his lips. “He’s back!” He lunged at me and wrapped his arms around my neck. “Gods, have I missed you. Where have you been?”

  “I’m not back,” I said with a frown. “I don’t even know why I’m here.”

  “I think I do,” came a voice. We all turned and there, with a crowbar and a wrench in his hands, was Giovanni.

  “Gio,” I said. “It’s been awhile.”

  “Awhile? Is that what they’re calling four years now?” He arched an eyebrow at me and I sighed. “Want to talk?” His eyes watched me cautiously.

  I glanced around at the guys and nodded. Not that I owed any of them an explanation, but Giovanni, the guy who had practically raised me, deserved more. Although I was reluctant on coming, being here made me realize how much I truly missed him.

  I followed Giovanni to a bench and he tossed the wrench and crowbar into a bin. He was getting old, I noted. He limped with his right leg and his full beard had flecks of grey in it. He’d shaven his head bald and it really made the slight wrinkles on his face apparent. Though, Giovanni was still very much a prodigy. He was the wisest person I knew, which made it hard to want to listen to his advice sometimes. It shamed me to be here because a friend had drug me back, but I learned you couldn’t run from him. You always came back.

  “Want to explain why you left?” he asked, his voice deep and burdened.

  I shrugged and said, “I did it for my family. I couldn’t be here and with them at the same time. The twins barely knew how to feed themselves and my mother was sick, what did you expect me to do?”

  Giovanni told Adamo and the guys to work on their lifts and they obediently turned away. Giovanni said, “Has it ever occurred to you that Milo and Misty are not your children and Carys is not your wife? Your entire childhood was so easily spent cleaning up after their mistakes that you barely had time to make your own and grow from them. Ayden, you were a man before you were even thirteen.”

  “I know.” I cringed and rubbed at my neck. “But if I don’t do it, who will? Can you imagine if I’d just left them? Who knows what would have happened? I can’t even think about it.”

  “Then think about yourself for once. You are in no condition to support a family, Ayden. Mentally or physically. When you’re done laboring all over the place, working here and there, do you honestly think there will be anything left in you to go on? This just isn’t your time.”

  “So, I’m supposed to let them die, then?” I asked angrily.

  “No,” he calmly answered. “You do all you can, and then you let someone help you.”

  I glanced away from him and stared over at the guys working. I didn’t say anything because a part of me knew he was right, that that was truly my problem. I shut everything off, everyone out. Maybe because I didn’t want to be disappointed, or simply because it was my family business, not his or Adamo’s. The only one who’d ever truly broken through to me was Echo, and she never had to say a thing.

  “It’s not your fault, you know? Life is the way it is, Ayden, and you always have a choice. Right now, you can choose to sit here and mope around or you can get up and do something with yourself. Let your father take some responsibility for a change. If he won’t listen to you, he’ll listen to me.”

  I cracked my knuckles and averted my eyes to the sun, which was now setting slowly just beyond the horizon. It was getting late. “What if I told you I used to be afraid of letting go? That I never imagined carrying on with life and leaving here behind?” I looked back at him and a small smile twitched at the corners of his mouth. “What if I told you I now found a reason to why any of that shouldn’t have mattered in the first place?”

  “I’d say you’ve changed, Ayden Grey. And whatever has caused that change in you, you shouldn’t let it go.” He looked out at the sun. “It’s made you remember what you are. Whoever she is.”

  I smiled and stood up from the bench. The sky had bled into a red-orange, the tall trees casting shadows against the dim of daylight. The cicadas had quieted to a soft hum, but they were still out there, somewhere. “How’d you know?” I asked Giovanni. Adamo cried uncle behind us and we laughed.

  “Ah, to be young and in love. A mystery of life. A blessing and a curse.” He stood, using the fence behind him for support. “You know where to find me. Just don’t go running off into trouble. Tell this girl she has to be mindful with you, she caught herself a wild one.”

  I sighed and shook my head. “Yeah. I’ll tell her. Take care, Gio.”

  He nodded and I walked away, feeling like the world had finally laid its sins off my shoulders. I got halfway down the street when Adamo stopped me. Sweaty, filthy, and smelling like burnt rubber, he said, “Where you off to now? I swear, I’ll have to get a leash for you.”

  I shrugged him away with a smile. “I’m going to meet my Princess lover.”

  “So, she is your lover?” he said with a coy smile.

  “No.”

  “So, then why—”

  I sighed and pushed Adamo in the other direction. “Weren’t you just doing something?”

  He stopped walking and kicked at the dirt. “Alright! I’m going to act, for a moment, that what you’re doing isn’t going to kill you. Ayden!”

  When I kept walking, Adamo finally gave up and ran back to Giovanni’s. I strolled in the opposite direction, towards the border, with a smile on my lips and Echo on my mind.

  DIFFERENT guards were posted at the border this time, and I recognized none of them but one. The same one who let Echo slip through when the country was on watch for her, Liamick. He looked at me as I approached and told the others to stand down as they readied their swords.

  “What’s this about?” I asked him, staring down a guard who hadn’t removed his eyes from me yet.

  “Ayden Grey, right?” I nodded. “You are no longer permitted on New Haven soil. You will have to find work elsewhere.”

  No,” I ground through clenched teeth. “There’s been a mistake. There has to be. Is there a list? Check the list.” The guards searched my eyes and I searched back. No longer permitted? If this hadn’t been so serious I would have laughed.

  Liamick moved back to the small room just before the gates and flipped through his book. My jaw and fists clenched, and I could feel every nerve in my body come alive with terror.

  He shook his head and said, “I’m sorry. The King has revoked your privil—”

  “He can’t do this!” I yelled. I raked my fingers through my hair and breathed deeply. I needed to see her. I looked at them. “I have to see her!”

  Liamick watched me and moved in front of the rest of the guards. He walked up to me and put a hand on my shoulder. “This doesn’t have to do with the girl I let pass through here, does it?”

  I nodded. “I love that girl and I need to see her before it’s too late.” I sighed “Her father must know.”

  “I’m sorry, but—”

  “You did it once, you can do it again. Please, I need to see her.”

  I saw the hesitation in his eyes, but he nodded slowly and patted my shoulder. He leaned forward and whispered, “Come back at midnight when the rest have been reassigned. I’ll get you to her.”

  I exhaled with relief and took a step away from him. “Thank you.”

  “I’m just as dead as you are, no need to thank me,” he said ruefully, smiling. “This girl must be something special.”

&nb
sp; As I treaded down the dirt roads and waited in the trees for midnight, I said with a smile, “She is.”

  I just hoped she’d still be there waiting for me.

  T W E N T Y-

  O N E

  Echo

  What was love anyway? I thought contritely.

  Love wasn’t an emotion or a feeling you suddenly got when you’re around someone. Love wasn’t something you thought about or regretted. Love was something you allowed to control you, and you prayed to the gods it would lead you to the right person. Love was addicting, a sinful narcotic. Love was…

  Love was Ayden.

  I sighed and shifted on the boulder I’d been lying on for hours. Tears streamed down my face and I was too depressed to move, to will myself to return to the palace. I wondered if Ayden was screaming for me, missing me. I was sure he realized he couldn’t get through the border by now, and it filled my heart with a void so unlike any other that it, on top of breathing becoming impossible, living became ridiculous. My heart aching for Ayden was ridiculous, but for seventeen years I had tried to squeeze myself into a world not fit for me, and he came along and showed me that it wasn’t about squeezing or fitting in, dammit, but becoming a part of something—someone—that already has a place for you. There would be no need for fitting in because I would already be welcomed.

  Was it too much to wish for the best? Or to hope for a happy ending? Couldn’t I have it if I wanted it? Couldn’t I have Ayden? Couldn’t we be happy? Forever? I cried out and my heart burned within my chest. I hated my father for making me choose between Ayden’s life and my own happiness. Didn’t he know that they were one in the same? Time away from Ayden was unthinkable, him gone was unimaginable. This man who’d practically come out of nowhere and stolen my heart.

  My feet moved before I could stop them. I felt like an infant taking their very first steps, my legs shaking and bones snapping. The sun had long gone down and left me alone and unsheltered. The river roared in front of me and I stared into the black abyss, holding back the tears that came. My hands shook and my faith waned. What gods would do this to me? What could I have possibly done?