The Rabbit Great And Terrible

by Chereta, Nelson

  It was not long after getting dressed that one of the queen’s maids came knocking on their door. The queen was inviting Alice to have breakfast with her. Followed by a nice massage and some game called, ‘pass the apple.’ Alice had immediately paled and tried to come up with some excuse. Waldo had insisted Alice was eager to join the queen and scooted her out of their room. Alice had sent him a hard look and he could sense she was upset through the bond. The queen was going out of her way to be a considerate host and his wife was trying to reject that generosity. Alice could be surprisingly inconsiderate of others at times.

  Waldo had already placed protective wards on himself and Alice. He did the same for Belle and recast her illusion. With that done, they exited the castle to go to the gymnasium. Waldo was eager to get as far away from Melissa as he could. And since he didn’t need any more purchases he planned to hide out with Belle. With just a little bit of luck Melissa would be too busy giving away bread or screaming at people to find him.

  XXX

  Waldo stood in a nearby corner observing as Restes screamed at Belle to keep her sword up. The instructor was whaling away on the disguised ogre. His wooden sword striking Belle in shoulders, arms, and chest at will. The exercise was focused entirely on defense. Belle was using a circular shield with her left arm along with a wooden sword. Restes was ordering her to hold the shield steady while trying to parry his sword strikes. Though far from an expert, Waldo could see Belle’s efforts were slow and clumsy. Belle’s strength meant she could easily knock Restes’s sword away, but not before he reached his target. Restes would step forward, lunge and the tip of his sword would land before Belle’s would swat it away.

  Restes shook his head. “Do you want to die? You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever met, but strength won’t save you if you can’t block anything.”

  “I’ve managed up ‘til now,” Belle said with irritation.

  “Honestly can’t imagine how. Did everyone you fight use blunted swords or clubs?”

  “I’m very tough.”

  Restes swung and smacked the upper half of Belle’s sword arm. “Are you tougher than iron? If this were a real sword that would have taken your arm off.”

  “Want to bet?”

  “If you’re not going to take this seriously, I can’t help you.”

  “Belle,” Waldo commanded. “You’re embarrassing me. Try harder.”

  Belle lowered her face. “Yes, master.”

  Waldo could sense discontent and frustration through the bond. The practice continued, he could tell Belle was making a sincere effort. It was just she didn’t have any experience with a sword. She would slash at each jab or slice Restes made. Four out of every five times their practice swords would only make contact after Restes had made contact. And since Restes wasn’t even sweating, he likely wasn’t going all out.

  Truthfully, Waldo didn’t really care. All this was for the sake of appearance. Ogres needed swords the same way a horse needed a cloak. He just wanted Belle to wave the sword around the Arena as she crushed people or bashed their skulls in. It would make her just a bit less conspicuous. The idea Belle might need the sword never crossed his mind. He was a bit worried about the minotaur, but was sure Belle would manage.

  As he watched, Waldo sensed someone with a magical enchantment enter the gymnasium. It was a short, cute girl with a leather jerkin and curved sword. From the amount of magic he sensed she had an illusion cast about her, but nothing more. She possessed no magical arms or equipment. The girl spotted him and walked right over without hesitation.

  “You’re Master Rabbit, Belle’s owner. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” She threw back both hands and performed an exaggerated bow. “I am Nen, an ordinary human girl just trying to make her way in this cold, hard world.”

  Waldo gave her a more restrained bow. “We’ve met, I know who you are.”

  “You sure about that?” Nen asked with a smirk. “No one here is exactly who they appear to be, and that most definitely includes you, Master Rabbit.”

  “I’m not wearing an illusion.”

  “You don’t need a spell to pretend to be something you’re not.”

  “I don’t know what you mean. I’m simply a White Mage, nothing more.”

  Nen stood there and smiled at him.

  Waldo was getting a bad feeling. “Why are you here? Is your mistress keeping an eye on Belle?”

  Nen shook her head. “The Exalted Lady doesn’t care how this turns out, she has nothing important at stake.”

  “Leiznam and his guild feel very differently.”

  Nen laughed and rolled her eyes. “They are a pack of squabbling children standing inside a burning house. One way or another they’ll be gone eventually. If Belle loses the Exalted Lady will find another way.”

  “If that’s true, then why are you here?”

  “I have my own reasons to want Varca beaten.”

  “So, you want to help train Belle?”

  Nen raised an eyebrow. “You think there’s anything your servant could learn in a couple days that would make a difference? You don’t know much about swordsmanship, do you?”

  “I’m a mage.”

  “Which is your way of saying you’re above such things.”

  Waldo shrugged, not denying it. “If nothing you show Belle will make a difference, why are you here?”

  “It might help a little bit along the way. Though, honestly, even there it won’t really matter. I’m sure she’ll win, just not by hacking people open. Your Belle will reach the final and face Varca, and then get butchered.”

  Waldo glanced to where Restes and Belle were still training and lowered his voice a bit. “An ogre can beat a minotaur.”

  “Out in the field, going claw to claw, that’s true. It’s a fair fight at least. But Varca has enchanted armor and a nasty magical battle axe. He’s a gladiatorial champion and an expert fighter, Belle has no chance. Well, not unless you are open to cheating.”

  “I am fine with cheating,” Waldo said. “So long as I don’t get caught. Or at least so long as I can’t get in trouble for it.”

  “I thought you might be. White Mages are very flexible when it comes to following rules. My suggestion is simple. All you need to do is…”

  Waldo listened to her idea. It wasn’t something he’d have ever suggested. “If I do this and it works, will your mistress still give me what she promised.”

  “Absolutely!” Nen’s smile was so bright and pure it hurt Waldo’s eyes. “The Exalted Lady only cares about the result, not the method. So long as Varca dies in the Arena you’ll find out where the dragon’s lair is.”

  Waldo rubbed his chin and thought about it.

  “Something the matter?’

  “No, I’m considering it.”

  “You should say yes; your Belle has no chance otherwise.”

  “So you say, but I’ve seen Belle fight. There are risks in what you’re suggesting. Letting Belle win on her own might be safer.”

  “Safer for Varca maybe, not for Belle or you.”

  “I’ll consider it,” Waldo said. He would, it was a very interesting suggestion. One that would take advantage of the guild’s own rules. But knowing the drow as he did, Waldo was automatically suspicious. “You say your mistress doesn’t really care how this turns out. So why are you so eager to help?”

  “I already told you, I have my reasons.”

  “Would you care to elaborate?”

  “No.”

  Waldo frowned at her.

  “You don’t trust me.” Nen said.

  “Trust is a dagger pointed at your own heart.”

  “Which is a fancy way of saying you don’t trust me.”

  “You’re drow,” Waldo said. “Do you really expect me to not be suspicious?”

  “No,” she admitted. “But my idea is the only chance your servant has. Well, you have a couple more days to think about it at least. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to beat on your pet ogre for a bit.”

&nb
sp; XXX

  As bad as Belle looked training with Restes, she looked ten times worse sparring with Nen. Nen didn’t bother holding back. She seemed to genuinely delight in smacking Belle as hard and as often as she could. Restes stood by watching the session. He told Nen to not hit so hard a few times before giving up. Through the bond Waldo could feel Belle grow increasingly frustrated as the match dragged on. At a certain point, Nen began to call out what she was aiming for.

  Sword wrist. Sword shoulder. Shield arm. Chest. Belly. Neck. Nen would say before smacking Belle at the mentioned body part. Even with the warning Belle couldn’t manage a clean block even once. If she moved too slow, Nen would strike, pull back, and then hit the same location a second time. She did explain what Belle was doing wrong in between blows. Belle’s form might have even improved slightly, but she was too slow to manage anything. If Belle were really human instead of an ogre her entire body would be covered in bruises.

  It was a disappointing performance, but Waldo still didn’t worry too much. Belle was an ogre. She would manage. Great Monsters were creatures of overwhelming strength, they didn’t need skills with weapons when they could rip trees out of the ground.

  As Waldo continues watching the practice session a well-dressed man in a velvet long coat and plumed hat entered the gymnasium. He certainly didn’t look like someone who was there to work up a sweat. The man immediately went over to where Waldo was. He was quite popular this morning.

  The man bowed with a flourish. “Pardon me, are you Master Waldo Rabbit?”

  “I am. And you are?”

  “I am Hiram Ayden, the owner of Ayden’s Fighting Pit. I would like to offer you a business opportunity. I have a full slate of matches tomorrow night. A little appetizer for the queen’s tournament, you might say. I would love to have your barbarian fight in the marque match.”

  Chapter 23

  An Easy Match

  Waldo blinked. “I’m sorry, what?”

  “I run one of the fighting pits in the outer city,” the man said with an eager tone. “We’ll be open tomorrow night hosting a whole series of exciting and entertaining matches! Unlike the Arena, the fighting pits are for the common people to come out an enjoy. We give the regular folk all the excitement and blood of gladiators fighting at a reasonable price!”

  “And you want my servant Belle to fight in one of these matches?”

  “No! Not a match, but the match!” Ayden spread his hands out before him. “We have a Northman barbarian, you have a southern plains barbarian! Two great and savage warriors from different ends of the world! Fighting each other to the death in my pit! Think what a spectacle it would make! The crowds would love it!”

  Waldo frowned. “Am I supposed to care about entertaining a horde of mundanes? In any case, Belle is fighting in the queen’s tournament the day after tomorrow. So, she is not fighting tomorrow night.”

  “We don’t have tournaments, we have single matches. All your barbarian needs to do is fight one match and that’s all! You could think of it as practice.” He waved a hand to where Nen was still mercilessly beating on Belle. “It might actually be useful. Has she ever fought in front of a crowd before? My pit doesn’t seat sixty thousand, but when the audience gets excited they scream louder than a virgin on her wedding night!”

  Waldo thought about it. Seen in terms of practice for the tournament, it might not be such a bad idea. How hard could a single fight be for an ogre?

  “Of course, I wouldn’t expect you to agree for nothing.” Ayden reached into a vest pocket and produced a stack of five gold coins. He held the coins out in his palm and lowered his eyes, like a supplicant making an offering. “Five gold marks for your barbarian to fight one match, win or lose.”

  Waldo looked at the coins and considered. The amount wasn’t significant compared to what he would earn when Belle won the tournament, but he expected it would make Alice happy. And his experiences up until now had given him some idea of how valuable gold was. If all Belle had to do was win one fight, it was easy money. It might also be good experience for her.

  “Her opponent is human?” Waldo asked.

  “He is. Asger is a ferocious savage, but no more than a man. We do have non-humans fight in the pits. It isn’t forbidden like it is in the Arena. We have goblins and orcs all the time. In fact, a match with a drow was going to be the main event before I came up with this.”

  “Wait! I can see a drow fight? A real fight? One to the death?”

  “Absolutely!” Ayden promised. “All the matches are to the death! If your girl fights you are welcome to come and watch from the front row as my personal guests.”

  That decided him. He had always wanted to see drow in action. (Where his life was not in danger.) Waldo reached out and took the gold marks. “She’ll do it.”

  “Excellent,” Ayden said with another bow. “Then I consider us to have a contract. Please deliver your barbarian to my fighting pit at sunset. I look forward to the spectacle. Until tomorrow night, Master Rabbit.”

  “Yes,” Waldo nodded absently as the man departed.

  XXX

  Nen was enjoying herself.

  While the human instructor kept yelling about holding up a shield and parries, she just kept dancing about her opponent, hitting ‘her’ at will. Usually, when she went all out like this, things ended quickly. It was a real pleasure to have a partner who could take a real beating. The way the ogre cried out each time she connected was sweet music to her ears. No hunk of wood could ever do genuine harm to an ogre. But if you hit hard enough you could inflict pain. The loud cracks of wood striking flesh and the yelps and cries that followed made her feel… excited.

  Smack!

  “Ow!”

  Nen laughed and twirled back a step as Belle swung in her general direction.

  “Don’t try to counter,” Restes said. “All it does is leave you more open.”

  “So, I’m supposed to stand here and let this bitch hit me?” Belle complained.

  “Concentrate on reading her movements and blocking her attacks. If you pay attention, her eyes will give everything away. Her feet, her stance, when she tenses, you need to read your opponent. The body never lies, their intentions are always right there. Open your eyes and pay attention and you will know what is coming.”

  “How long does that take?”

  “A lot longer than two days.” Nen skipped forward and brought her sword down overhand onto Belle’s left shoulder as hard as she could.

  Crack!

  “Ow! Damn!”

  Nen pranced back out of range before Belle even finished cursing. The disguised ogre was glaring at her. ‘She’ had originally treated all this as a game, but was now genuinely frustrated. Belle stomped forward and began swinging wildly. With the greatest of ease, Nen sidestepped and smacked Belle’s sword arm just past the elbow.

  Nen wagged a finger at her opponent. “Getting angry and chasing me just makes you even easier to hit.”

  Belle stopped and stood straight, getting out of ‘her’ stance and putting both arms to ‘her’ side. “Tell me something, sweetie. If I threw away this stupid stick and shield and decided to rip you into pieces, what would you do?”

  “With just this?” She held the practice sword out in front of her face. “I’d run and....”

  “Yeah, you would!” Belle gave a triumphant nod.

  “You didn’t let me finish,” Nen said. “I’d run and get my sabers. Then I’d come back here, hack your arms and legs off, slit open your belly, stab you through your lungs, and then cut your head off so I can use it as a fruit bowl.”

  The smug look on Belle’s face drained away as Nen gave her detailed explanation.

  “I know you’re a scary monster to ordinary people with ordinary weapons, but I’m a drow blademaster. To me you wouldn’t even be much of a fight.”

  “Then why are you here?” Belle asked.

  “Believe it or not, I want to help you. There’s no way you could learn enough to be a competent
swordsman before the tournament, but maybe you could pick up just a couple of the basics. It’s something and might be worthwhile. I want you to succeed, and if I can help you along I will.”

  “That so?” Belle sounded suspicious. “I was sort of getting the feeling that you were just doing it because you like hitting me.”

  “That too.”

  “Are you two done practicing together?” Restes asked. “Should I take over?”

  Nen rested her wooden sword on her shoulder and smirked at Belle. “Are we done, my pretty? Is mean old Nen and her stick too much for you?”