The Rabbit Great And Terrible

by Chereta, Nelson

  Belle glanced back at where Waldo was, then shook ‘her’ head. Belle got back into a fighting stance and lifted sword and shield into position. “As if, bring it on bitch.”

  “Now that’s what I like to hear,” Nen purred and strolled up to Belle. “Defiance.”

  XXX

  Awhile later, after a considerable amount of beating on her opponent, Nen noticed the arrival of a familiar figure. Ayden didn’t recognize her in her current incarnation, and she had no reason to greet him. He went over to talk with Master Rabbit. Nen observed their conversation while continuing to spar with Belle. A few minutes after Ayden’s departure she called a stop to the practice and let Restes take over as she went to speak to Belle’s master.

  Nen got directly to the point. “What did Ayden want?”

  “You know him?”

  “We have a business relationship. What did he want?”

  “Oh, he asked to have Belle fight in a match tomorrow.”

  Nen raised an eyebrow. “Well that’s unusual. They have their own supply of warm bodies, they don’t usually have to recruit. I assume you told him no.”

  She was surprised when Waldo shook his head. “I was going to, but he offered me five gold marks. I would be silly to pass up such easy money, and it’ll probably be good practice for Belle.”

  “Wait. Ayden offered you gold?”

  “That’s right, and he’s already paid me.”

  She pursed her lips. “The fighting pits never pay in gold; five silver marks is the absolute most they’ll pay for a contestant. And then only if she’s a headliner. Something is going on.”

  “It’s just one match, and Ayden assured me Belle’s opponent will be human. Belle won’t have a problem.”

  “Who will she be fighting?”

  “Some Northman.”

  “Asger,” Nen said with a curt nod. “He’s damn good for a human. He’s probably the second-best gladiator in this city.

  “Good, then it will be good practice for Belle. It doesn’t matter how skilled he is. If he’s a human without a magical weapon Belle can handle him.”

  Nen sent him a hard look. “If.”

  XXX

  Cleptus stirred awake in the soft, warm bed. Cassandra was on one side of him and Aliya cuddled up against him on the other. From the sunlight coming in through the window is was past noon. Time to get up, get something to eat, and rob some people. With one hand he gave Cassandra’s tits a gentle squeeze.

  Well… maybe after one more round.

  Chapter 24

  A Most Excellent Thief

  Cassandra and Aliya charged him for the morning session. He didn’t mind. The girls were young, pretty, and talented with their mouths. He had plenty of coin and couldn’t imagine a better way to spend it. After he got done he even treated the girls to lunch before they went back to the pleasure house where they worked. They’d seen the seal carved into his chest. He’d told them it was the sign of the Order of Valtonian Knights, of whom he was a member. His missing finger he’d explained as being bitten off by a monstrous ogre in the midst of battle. That was even the truth, if you stretched the definition of ‘battle’ just a tiny bit. He’d told the girls he was in Torikai looking for revenge on the man who’d murdered his little sister. Women, even whores, LOVED that sort of thing.

  Stepping outside the inn it was a clear, crisp, late fall afternoon. When the wind blew you could feel winter approaching, but it was still pleasant enough if you had a cloak and long sleeves. His cloak was dark green, his shirt and trousers a murky blue, and his leather boots an oak brown. All his clothes were new and except for the boots, tailor made. Back in Norwich his ‘work’ clothes had always been either brown or grey, to help him blend into the crowd and vanish. Here in Torikai everyone seemed to be competing to be the most brightly colored and well dressed. Wearing brown and grey would have made him stand out. The colors would work perfectly in the Rats Nest, but not inside the wall.

  Well a good thief knew how to adapt, and so he’d bought himself a beautiful new wardrobe. It wasn’t exactly a burden for him, especially since Waldo was paying for it, along with his spacious room, his meals, wine, and nightly entertainments. Technically, everything he stole belonged to Waldo. But he was sure Waldo would understand the need to cover necessary expenses.

  Or not, it didn’t really matter.

  Walking down the street he sauntered past a squad of gold guards and gave them a cheerful wave. The plumed officer in charge nodded back to him. Daring smiled and almost burst into laughter. The royal guards of Torikai were supposed to be some of the best in the world, especially when it came to catching thieves. Back home he’d heard all the stories about what happened to thieves that tried to steal here. How they were always caught and how their hands would be chopped off and nailed up to wooden posts outside the guard houses. But then he’d also heard that the wall here was made of gold and that there were coins littering the streets.

  His time with Waldo had taught him about illusion and how magic could make ordinary things precious and monstrous things beautiful. Daring understood the armor the guards wore, and the city wall weren’t really golden. But the fat bellies stretching out the mail and the dull eyes were real enough. There were a lot more guards here than there’d been in Norwich, but they weren’t anything special.

  A couple men in front of him were loudly arguing about the upcoming tournament and who to bet on. He was surprised to hear one of them mention Belle’s name. Had Waldo entered Belle in the big contest coming up? That wasn’t part of the plan, but trust the idiot to do something completely unexpected. If Belle really was fighting he’d have to remember to put some money on her. You couldn’t go wrong betting on a disguised ogre.

  As he was walking past he rolled his shoulders to make his cloak billow a bit and cut off the view of anyone who might be behind him. His right hand took hold of the purse of the man he was passing. In his left he slipped out the thin peeling knife he kept hidden up his sleeve. The blade’s edge was sharp as a razor. One tiny, swift cut and the full weight of the purse plopped down into his palm. The knife was slid back up his palm and the purse dropped into a hidden pocket sewn into his cloak. The man he’d robbed was still arguing with his friend, oblivious to the theft. Cleptus Daring continued to walk at the same pace, neither hurrying, slowing, nor suddenly changing direction. He continued past and was about half a block ahead when he heard shouts about a stolen purse. He drew no attention and kept walking. Some guards rushed past him to investigate, but it had nothing to do with him.

  Too easy, he thought. For someone with his experience and skill it really was no challenge at all. There were guards almost everywhere, but the streets were always full of people that provided ample cover. Daring was observant and always aware of his surroundings. He blended in and avoided drawing unnecessary attention. He chose his targets carefully, looking for people who were already distracted. He avoided the folk who were the center of attention or who had their own entourages, too many eyes. He never went back for seconds, he stole once and moved on to a different street or neighborhood. For a thief, being too greedy was like sipping a sweet poison. It was delicious right up until the moment it killed you.

  That was how you became a great thief, that was how you became the master of your own thieves’ guild. You didn’t get too greedy and you didn’t take needless risks. If I’d remembered that I wouldn’t be here now. I’d be back in Norwich with my boys. But the moment I saw Alice I was doomed. He’d been the helpless victim of her unnatural beauty and then of Waldo’s crazy schemes.

  Daring had been born and raised in Norwich. He’d never expected to leave the city, never mind Lothas. Most people lived their entire lives within twenty miles of the place where they were born. He’d been happy with his life. Yes, he was a criminal who spent his life stealing hearts, coins, and anything else that slipped into reach. But he wasn’t a bad man. In life you played the cards you were dealt. He’d worked hard to build a decent life for himself an
d always watched out for his boys.

  Then Waldo had shown up and ripped his whole life to shreds. Waldo was easily ten times a worse criminal than he would ever be. All the worst stories about White Mages being corrupt and self-serving were true and then some. Using monsters as servants? Carving a magical seal into a man’s chest and making him your slave? Robbing whole villages under the guise of saving them from an ogre attack? It made cutting a few purses and sleeping with some married women look like childish games.

  He bought an apple from a fruit stand and continued walking though the busy streets. Eyes open for the next target of opportunity. Daring was fair minded and willing to admit that the last few months hadn’t been all bad. Being able to go invisible was every thief’s dream, and a lot of the thefts on the road had been entertaining. Whenever they stopped in a town or large village, Waldo let him have a little fun with the local ladies. And, of course, he never would have come here if it weren’t for Waldo. Torikai was one of the jewels of the world and fat purses could be picked like fruit. His time here had been some of the most fun he’d ever had in his life. Talking to some of the locals he’d found out that here in Torikai you could buy lordships! Back in Lothas commoners couldn’t even buy land! If he could stay here until the spring, he could get his hands on enough gold to become Lord Cleptus Daring of Such and Such.

  Daring took another bite of his apple. Too bad it would never happen. The best he could hope for was another few weeks before Alice or Belle tracked him down and told him it was time to go. He was Waldo’s slave and had no freedom to decide anything. Waldo would take all the coins he had, except a handful which might be a ‘gift.’ Waldo liked to pretend he was a very generous and considerate owner, and could be polite. But there was never any doubt as to who had the power. The scars on his chest were a constant reminder of that truth.

  The fact he could have some fun now and again in no way lessened the hate Daring felt for the idiot. Waldo had taken everything from him and made him a damned servant. That wasn’t something to forgive. The problem was the seal meant he couldn’t do anything about it. If he killed Waldo he was killing himself. So, there was nothing to do but enjoy life as best he could.

  Up ahead he spotted a grey-haired man leaning against a beauty who had to be half his age. His eyes were on her and nowhere else. Daring took a last bite and threw away the apple core. He walked up beside the man; shrugged, sliced, grabbed, and was casually walking away without drawing anyone’s attention.

  He made it three steps when there was sudden, violent pain in the back of his head. Everything turned black.

  Chapter 25

  Give Them A Hand

  His head was ringing. It hurt so bad he couldn’t think about anything but the pain. He kept his eyes shut and put one hand to the side of his head. He whispered a silent prayer to the gods promising to never drink again. His mouth was dry and there at least wasn’t any taste of vomit. What in the hells had he been drinking? Potato whiskey? Had he and the boys been celebrating? He couldn’t remember. Never again. If this was what the morning after felt like, he was never touching potato whiskey again!

  The gods took pity on him and the pain inside his skull went from stabbing with a dull knife to smacks from a hammer. It was still a long way from good, but he thought he might live. Daring opened his eyes, everything was a blur. He blinked, shut them, opened and shut them again. After a few moments the world came into focus.

  He was lying on a stone floor and staring at a set of iron bars. Oh fuck! Seeing he was imprisoned cleared his thoughts. He remembered where he was and what he’d been doing. He slowly, very slowly, sat up and looked around. He was in a cage, and a small one, about five feet by five feet. He was alone. The only other thing in it was a wooden bucket. Daring was still in his cloak and other clothes. He checked, but the daggers hidden up his sleeves were missing, so were the ones he kept in his boots.

  “Don’t bother,” a voice said. “Everyone gets searched before they get put in the cells. Whatever you’re looking for it’s gone.”

  Daring looked up and was rewarded by a stab of pain. He clenched his teeth and let it pass. It was at this point, he noticed his cell was part of a whole row of them. Across the way was another row with a man in faded grey tunic and brown trousers leaning against his cell door. Daring saw another man in the neighboring cell who was huddled in a corner and appeared to be sobbing. All the remaining cages were empty.

  “Where am I?” He asked.

  “Guard station,” the man said. “Not sure which one, not that it matters I suppose.”

  Daring tried and got to his feet. He had to grab a bar to steady himself. “I need to talk to someone, there’s been a mistake.”

  The man nodded with a smirk. “Sure.”

  “I was just walking along the street, when I was suddenly attacked without warning.” Daring said sounding sincere and righteously offended.

  “That was probably one of the unseen guards.”

  “Unseen?” That did not sound good.

  The other man nodded. “The guild makes some of the guards invisible. They’re the ones who catch almost all the thieves in this place. Not fair if you ask me.”

  Daring gritted his teeth. Waldo never said there’d be invisible guards! If he had I’d have been more careful! He knew all about invisibility magic, but it had never occurred to him that anyone other than a thief would use it.

  “There’s still been some sort of mistake. The guard must have thought I was someone else. I am completely innocent.”

  “Right. You just happened to have two purses with cut strings, a set of lock picks, and six knives on you. The guards were talking while they put you in your cell. You’re guilty, and even if you weren’t it still wouldn’t matter. If they say you’re guilty then you are.”

  Daring glanced at the cell door and the common lock on it. He could open it in less than a minute… if he still had his lock picks. He studied his surroundings. Beyond the two rows of cells were stone walls. A pair of barred windows let in some fading light, it was probably at or past sunset. On the far end of the room was a single door made of oak with iron bans. If he’d had his tools, or a few friends on the outside…

  “I have to get out of here,” he muttered.

  The other man laughed, but there was nothing pleasant in it. “You will, don’t worry. We all get out tomorrow. Just a quick,” the man held up his right hand and wiggled his fingers. “Chop, chop and we’re free to go.”

  The other man in his cell began crying more loudly.

  Daring grabbed bars of his cell door and began to shout at the top of his lungs. “Guard! Guard!”

  “What are you doing?” The man across from him asked. “If you bother the guards you’re going to get a beating.”

  Daring ignored him and kept right on shouting. He kept at it for ten minutes and was starting to lose hope anyone could hear him. Then the main door swung open. A rotund and grizzled man with a club over one shoulder entered.

  “Shut up or I’ll crack open your skull!”

  “There has been a terrible mistake! I am innocent and don’t belong here.”

  “Yeah, yeah, everybody’s innocent, no one did nothing. Now keep your mouth shut or I’ll shut it for you.” The man turned to go.

  “You don’t know who I am! I know someone very powerful who will vouch for me!”

  “Let me guess, you’re best friends with the queen?” He reached the door and started to close it behind him.

  “Waldo Rabbit!” Daring shouted. “The White Mage Waldo Rabbit! I serve him, and he will protect me! Contact him and he will fix everything, I promise you!”

  The door was half way shut when it stopped and opened wide again. The guard glared at him. “You’re lying.”

  Daring immediately put two fingers over his right eye. “May Wotal strike me blind if I lie! Just send a message to him that his man Cleptus Daring is here, and he’ll explain!”

  The guard remained at the door for a long moment tappi
ng his club on the stone floor. “If this turns out to be a joke, you’ll regret it.” The door slammed shut.

  Daring let out a long breath. It was okay now. Waldo had told him not to reveal their connection, but given the situation, he was sure it would be fine. There was no way he’d want a thief with one hand.

  XXX

  Waldo and Alice were in their quarters getting ready for bed when there was a knock on their door. When Waldo answered it, he was very surprised to find the court mage standing there.

  “Master Garibaldi,” Waldo said in a polite manner. “Is there something I can help you with?”

  “Master Rabbit,” Garibaldi said with a measured tone. “I am not certain. I have just received word from the royal guard that a prisoner claims to work for you. Tell me, do you know a man named Cleptus Daring?”

  “Yes, I do. Has something happened to him?”