When Loyalty Dies, So Does Love

by Dorothy Brown-Newton

  I looked at his ass, as if to say, “Really?”

  He took out his phone with his free hand, and I watched as he silenced it. “Tash, can you do me a favor?” he asked.

  “What can I do for you, Rellz?” I said, being mean and not caring.

  “Can you please go out to the waiting area and tell Lecia it’s going to be a while, so she can go home? Tell her I’ll meet her back at the house when they release RJ,” he said, handing me his car keys.

  All I could do was roll my eyes as I took the keys, while silently cursing his ass out. I didn’t have a problem with his girl rolling with him to the hospital. The problem I was having was the bitch calling his phone and being impatient when our fucking son was sick. I was going to enjoy secretly the look on her face when I told her that Rellz had said that she should bounce and go the fuck home. Well, those were not his words exactly, but it would feel that way to her ass when I told her.

  Why did I get to the waiting area and spot this bitch standing by the vending machine, looking like she was ready to walk the runway? I knew Rellz had told her ass that he was coming to the hospital because his son was sick. The fucking hospital, as in emergency room. So why had this bitch felt the need to put on a maxi dress and some fucking stilettos? Bitch, bye. I couldn’t wait to tell this bitch what Rellz had said. I walked over to where she was standing and tried my best not to laugh in this bitch’s face for looking like a fucking fool in that outfit.

  “Hey, Lecia. Rellz asked me to bring you the car keys and to tell you that he will meet you back at the house after RJ is released,” I said, trying not to laugh.

  “Excuse me!” she said, looking at me with the stink face, like she hadn’t heard me.

  “Rellz said he doesn’t know how long this is going to take, so take the car and go home,” I said, not so nice this time.

  “Tasha, you can tell Rellz that my ass didn’t come alone, and I’m damn sure not leaving alone,” she shouted, like we weren’t in the hospital.

  “Lecia, I’m just telling you what he said.”

  “And I’m telling you what you can tell him,” she yelled.

  “Listen, Lecia, I don’t know what you’re used to, but please don’t yell at me again. Yes, my son is sick, but I’m not going to keep being civil while you stand here, acting like a child who is throwing a tantrum, when I need to be in the back. Now, you can take the keys, and if not, it’s whatever,” I said, then walked away.

  “Tasha, kill me with the bullshit. RJ is not your son. He’s Rellz’s son, so maybe you should get in your car and go home to your child, and let me be here for my man and his son,” the bitch had the nerve to say.

  I took a deep breath before I spoke, because I was on eight, and if I reached ten, this bitch was going to be a patient and no longer a visitor.

  “You know what? You stay right here, looking like a top model reject, bitch, while I go in the back with your man and my son,” I told her.

  I left that bitch standing there, looking stupid. I must have taken too long—or so I thought—because as I was walking through the door, Rellz was walking toward me. But it turned out that he was heading in my direction because the bitch had texted him, talking recklessly. I handed him his keys as we passed each other, and then I continued walking. I had no words for him at that moment because that bitch had pissed me off. That girl had got me fucked up; and were we anywhere other than at the hospital, her ass would be on the floor right now—and my foot, in her face.

  Rellz

  I got the call from Tasha that RJ had to be taken to the hospital, and she needed me to meet her there. I ran into the bedroom, and as I threw something on, Lecia stood in the doorway, asking me where I was going. I told her that I had to get to the hospital because RJ was sick, and next thing I knew, she was getting dressed. I didn’t mind her coming with me to see about my son, but the fact that she had chosen to wear her club outfit kind of pissed me off. Being as I was in a rush, I figured I would check her ass later. Now wasn’t the time; I needed to get to the hospital.

  When we got to the hospital, I left Lecia in the waiting area so that I could go see about RJ. As soon as I got to the back, I could hear my li’l man crying. I walked into the room to see Tasha crying too. I pick my li’l man up and sat him on my lap so that the nurse could do what she needed to do.

  My phone rang, and at the sound of my ringtone, Tasha looked at me sideways but didn’t say anything. I ignored Lecia’s call, but then she texted me, asking what was taking so long. I swear, I had been in the back for only about ten minutes, but since she seemed to be in a rush, I asked Tasha to take her the car keys and to tell her that she could go home and that I’d meet her at the crib when they released RJ. I had just gotten RJ quiet when my phone alerted me that I had received another text message. It was Lecia telling me that I had better come and get Tasha before she got bodied. I was tight when I asked the nurse to sit with RJ for a second.

  As I headed toward the waiting area, Tasha was coming toward me. She looked just as tight as I was, but she didn’t say anything as she handed me my keys. I walked out the door, and Lecia was standing there, with her hand on her hip, looking like a damn fool with those stilettos on. I grabbed her by her arm, pulled her outside through the automatic doors.

  “Rellz, get the fuck off of me!” she yelled, getting the guard’s attention.

  “Lecia, if you don’t stop with this stupid shit, I swear I’m going to knock your fucking head off.”

  “So you’re coming at me like this for that bitch?”

  “Lecia, let me explain something to you. I don’t have time for you and these childish antics. You knew I was coming to the hospital about my damn son. You bitched to come with me, but now you’re rushing a nigga, so I told Tasha to tell you to take your ass home.”

  “Why the fuck do I have to go home? That’s your son, and I’m your fucking girl.”

  “Do you hear how fucking stupid you sound? That’s her son just as much as he’s mine.”

  “Really? Are you sure that’s all she is? I’m reading more into this just being the two caring parents that you claiming you two to be.”

  “Lecia, just the fact that my son is laid up in a hospital bed, with a fever, and I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with him should be enough for you to be just as concerned. But no, you’re out here on some rah-rah bullshit. You can take these keys and go home. If not, then get home the best way you can.” I said, holding out the keys for her.

  “Fuck you, Rellz,” she said, grabbing the keys.

  I just shook my head as I walked off. This shit here was getting old. Lecia didn’t respect shit, and these fucking tantrums had become more frequent. I was done. She had to go. Family was just that, and if you didn’t respect my family, you damn sure didn’t respect me. Tasha was holding RJ when I got back into the room. She didn’t say anything, but I felt the need to apologize for Lecia.

  “Tash, I just wanted to apologize for Lecia. She was out of line.”

  “Rellz, you don’t have to apologize for her. I’m kind of used to dealing with the insecure women in your life.”

  “Tash, I know I don’t have to apologize for her. I just feel the need to.”

  “Well, there’s no need to. I’m good. Nothing that trick said got to me. What bothers me a little is why you felt the need to tell her that RJ wasn’t our son, but yours.”

  “I had just met Lecia when I told her that RJ was my son. I didn’t go into the details about who his mother was. She just knows that you’re not his mother.”

  “Whether I’m his mother or not, he’s still my blood. So for that bitch to say that I have no right to be here with you, and that she should, made me want to slap the dog shit out of her ass.”

  I laughed at the dog shit comment, causing her to smile.

  “Rellz, you really need to check her ass. I’m a mom now, and I don’t have time to be fighting every time these bitches are feeling some type of way.”

  “I feel you, and I will defin
itely be having a talk with her,” Rellz assured me.

  “You better. And don’t get it twisted. I’d rather not fight, but I will if she come at me sideways again.”

  “Tash, you don’t have to tell me. I already know how you get down.”

  The ER doctor came back into the room to let us know that RJ’s test results had come back normal. He had been diagnosed with a viral infection, and it needed to run its course. There was no medication given for a viral infection, just liquids and Motrin to keep the fever down. He said that RJ would be back to himself in about a week, but if his symptoms got worse to bring him back to the emergency room. The doctor also told us that even though RJ might feel better in a few days, we should still do a follow-up appointment with his family doctor.

  By the time we were leaving the hospital with RJ, Lecia was blowing my phone up with crazy-ass text messages, asking me how was I getting home. I needed to speak with her, but I wasn’t in the mood to do that now. It was already two in the morning, and so I decided to stay at Tasha’s house. I would sleep in RJ’s bedroom and keep an eye on him.

  Lecia

  Here I was once again, sitting in the damn house, messaging Rellz back-to-back, but to no avail. I knew he was probably punishing me for my actions, but I didn’t see anything wrong with the way I had acted. Now granted, his son was sick, and I appreciated Tasha taking him to the hospital, but once Rellz and I got there, she could have left and gone home to her children. No way I should have been left in the fucking waiting area, so if Rellz was mad at me for going off, oh well.

  I called the hospital and they said that RJ had been discharged, so now I was wondering where the hell Rellz was. RJ had been discharged about an hour ago. I didn’t want to hear nothing about Rellz spending the night over there because he didn’t have a ride. Once he knew that his son was being released, he should have called me and asked me to pick them up. I was so tired of playing second to this bitch, and I was furious that Rellz’s ass allowed it. He didn’t respect me as his girlfriend. I was so sick of dealing with this bullshit. I really felt like getting in the car and going to her house, but since she had moved from her mom’s place, I had no idea where she lived. Rellz hadn’t mentioned it to me. I tried his phone again, only to be sent to voice mail. I really hated to be this chick, but I took my ass into the living room and turned on the television so I could go through the caller ID from the house. Yes, Time Warner Cable lets you see the caller ID on the television screen. Cool, right? Once I retrieved Tasha’s phone number, I called her phone.

  “Hello.” By the way her voice sounded, I was sure I had woken her up.

  “Can I speak to Rellz?” I said, skipping the formalities.

  “Who is this?” She sounded fully awake now at the mention of Rellz’s name.

  “Let’s not play games. This is Lecia. Who else would be calling for Rellz?”

  “Bitch, I see you done lost your damn mind, calling my phone at three in the morning with your nonsense.”

  “No, Rellz lost his mind if he thought I wasn’t going to have a problem with him staying the night at your house.”

  “Well, you know what, Lecia? You can discuss that with Rellz when you see him, because Rellz and my son are sleeping, bitch.”

  I knew this bitch didn’t hang up on me. I dialed her number again, just to be sent to voice mail. Ugh. I hated that bitch, and I hated Rellz’s ass too. I took my ass in the bathroom to take a shower so that I could go to bed. I would deal with Rellz when he got his ass home.

  It felt like I had just gone to sleep when I awoke to things being thrown around the room. I jumped up, scared to death, and looked for something to use as a weapon, but I was knocked down on the bed by Rellz. He started grabbing all my stuff out of the closet and then the dresser. He pulled out only the things that belonged to me.

  “Rellz, what the fuck are you doing?”

  “Bitch, don’t act like you don’t know what this is. You wanted to be gangsta and call Tasha’s house, looking for me, stressing her out, when you know my fucking son is sick.”

  “You damn right I called that bitch’s house. Like you just said, your son is sick, so why did you go to this bitch’s house when he was released, instead of calling me to pick you up?”

  “Watch your fucking mouth. I’m a grown-ass man, and I don’t have to explain shit to you.”

  “See, that’s where you got the game fucked up. If I wasn’t your live-in girlfriend and was just fucking you, then yes, you wouldn’t have to explain. But I’m fucking living with your ass, so when you don’t come home or don’t have plans to come home, then you need to call and inform me,” I said, patting his head.

  I couldn’t believe it when he grabbed me by my neck. I couldn’t breathe. I scratched at his hands, to no avail, as he continued to apply force on my neck. I decided just to calm down and not fight, and that was when he released me.

  “Lecia, get your shit and get the fuck out now, before I kill your ass in here,” he said, out of breath.

  I wanted to move, but I couldn’t. I was hurt. I knew I pushed his buttons all the time, but I wouldn’t in a million years have thought he would put his hands on me. He had said he loved me, but that was not the case, because love didn’t hurt, and it damn sure didn’t harm. I had called Tasha because he was being disrespectful by staying overnight at her house without calling me or answering my calls, and yet I was in the wrong. If it wasn’t clear before, it was clear now. Rellz’s heart belonged to Tasha.

  Rellz

  I was sitting in my movie room downstairs, trying to calm down. I was having a flashback of the day I had to choke Rena’s ass out. After that day, I had said I would never put my hands on another female, but Lecia’s ass was foul for calling Tasha with that bullshit. I was in a relationship with her ass, not Tasha, so if I wasn’t answering my phone, she had no right to call Tasha. I hoped the boys in blue didn’t show up at my fucking door. This bitch needed to get her shit and bounce. I sent Tasha a text, letting her know that I would be back at her place after I handled shit over here. I sat in the movie room for a good thirty minutes; I figured that should be enough time for Lecia to get her shit and be gone. When I got upstairs and walked into the bedroom, I was surprised to see that she had only taken her things and left. I really had expected her to trash some shit before leaving.

  I hopped in the shower to get my mind right and my body clean before heading back to Tasha and the kids. I didn’t know what this breakup meant for me and Tasha, but I was damn sure taking a break from the dating scene for a while. Trying to find a woman who was willing to love me and respect me as a single parent, one who still dealt with the other parent, was proving immensely difficult. It simply was not working for me. From now on, if it was not about my kids, Tasha, or my businesses, it was not about nothing.

  Rena

  I was awakened by the ringing of my telephone. It was Kane, telling me to unlock the door. I had changed the locks on the door after that nigga walked out and stayed gone for a whole fucking week. I would have left his ass standing out there, but I wasn’t in the mood for a showdown. This morning sickness had been kicking my ass. Raina had been a great help to me, bringing me whatever I asked for. I’d been so sick that I didn’t even realize until today that I hadn’t heard from Rellz in a while. He hadn’t called to speak to his baby girl, either. I had to remind myself to call him later on to see what was really going on.

  I felt so unwell that I literally had to crawl to the front door from the living room, where I’d been napping on the couch. Raina was upstairs in her bedroom, doing the same. After eating some crackers and drinking some warm ginger ale that she served me, I’d fallen asleep on the couch. I would be still sleeping if Kane hadn’t rung my phone.

  As soon as I opened the door, I could see the anger lines on his forehead, but after he took a good look at me, his face became etched with concern and his expression softened.

  “Rena, are you okay?” he asked.

  I didn’t have the strengt
h to answer him as he helped me back over to the couch.

  “Rena, if you weren’t feeling well, you should have called me.”

  “Kane, call you for what? You left out of here, mad, and stayed away for a whole fucking week. No call, nothing,” I tried to yell, but it came out just above a whisper.

  “Okay. You’re right, but I was pissed off, and you would have been too. You still could have called. What’s wrong?”

  “I have been sick since the day you left, but today this morning sickness has been kicking my ass. I didn’t experience any of this with Raina. I feel like I’m dying.”

  “I know now isn’t the time, but I need to know if you will be keeping our baby.”

  I thought about his question, and I looked at the scared expression on his face as he awaited my answer. I wanted to tell him that I had never had any intention of aborting his baby, and that the night he’d come over and caught me smoking, I hadn’t been thinking clearly. I’d just been stressed out, but my need to be right always hadn’t allowed me to say any of those things.

  “Kane, if I wasn’t keeping our baby, do you think I would have sat here for the past week, going through all of this?”

  “Well, I’m going to say this, and I mean what I say. I love you, and I would love for you to keep the baby, but if you throw in my face one more time that you’ll abort my baby, I’m going to bust you in your mouth. You know I don’t like to do all the back-and-forth, but lately, you have been trying to take me there,” he said.

  I was physically drained, so I just let him speak his piece. Then we agreed that I would make a prenatal appointment tomorrow so that I could start taking the vitamins. I had to run abruptly to the bathroom and rid myself of the crackers and ginger ale I’d consumed earlier. I’m telling you, this was going to be a miserable pregnancy. I was convinced this baby was a boy, because, like I said, I had none of this when I was pregnant with Raina.