Unintentionally Yours

by Terry Fowler

  Ben nodded again. “Maxine had really bad asthma. Neither of his parents was overly friendly, but Maxine was the nicer of the two.”

  Marty dusted off her hands and picked up the third bottle. She dropped down into a chair. “That’s a sad environment for a little boy.”

  “No way,” Ben said with a hint of laughter in his voice. “Think one little boy with two doting women. You know they were intent on keeping Josiah happy.”

  “I think Cecily got more than she bargained for when she took Joseph on as a husband.”

  Marty looked surprised. “Did Cecily say that?”

  Leah shook her head. “No. Never. Total assumption on my part. She loved him. Never dated anyone else.”

  “Joseph couldn’t say that.”

  A definite chill crept into her mother’s tone. Concern changed Ben’s expression as he looked at his wife. Leah wondered how her dad felt regarding Joseph Byrd’s ability to inspire anger in Marty after all these years. What was it about the man that stirred up the people she loved?

  As she grew aware of their surreptitious looks, Marty spoke. “I’m sorry. I truly could care less about Joseph Byrd. It makes me furious that I allowed myself to be duped like that.”

  Confused, Leah asked, “Duped?”

  Marty patted her daughter’s hand. “It’s not important, Leah. I thank God daily for my blessings.” She glanced at Ben, love shining in her gaze. “And that He kept me from making a stupid decision all those years ago.”

  He winked at her and she winked back.

  “Are you sure you want to invite Josiah to dinner?”

  Marty’s brown-eyed gaze fixed on her. “When you marry, your husband will become part of our family. Our son. And if God intends for Josiah to fill that role, we want to know and love him, too.”

  Leah wrapped her arms about Marty’s neck. “I love you, Mom. I’ll let you know what Josiah says.”

  * * *

  As he drove over to pick Leah up for dinner with her parents, Josiah couldn’t imagine what they had in store for him. Leah had said her mom asked about the seriousness of their relationship and that she had said they were enjoying getting to know each other. Josiah thought maybe Marty Wright might think he wasn’t willing to commit.

  Would it be the Wrights against the Byrd? The moment he let that thought into his head, Josiah struggled to squash it back. When had it become him and them? They had never been anything but hospitable. He couldn’t judge them if he didn’t want them to judge him in return.

  He soon learned his fears had been in vain. Ben welcomed him and they talked golf over the grill as Marty and Leah prepared the sides. Over dinner, they laughed and talked like old friends. The conversation flowed from subject to subject with no uncomfortable pauses.

  “You should have seen his face when they set his plate on the table,” Marty said, struggling to hold back her laughter as she shared a story about her husband in a London restaurant.

  Ben objected. “It’s your fault. You were always telling me to be adventurous and try something different. I made a fool of myself.”

  She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “No, you didn’t.”

  “We can’t go back until they forget my face.”

  Marty hooted with laughter. “You’ll never be forgotten.”

  Ben glared at his wife and she burst into laughter. “Honey, I’m sure you weren’t the worst tourist they’ve ever had.”

  “Next to worst?”

  Marty held back a guffaw. “I didn’t say that.”

  Leah loved the way her parents teased each other. She stood. “I have a special treat for dessert. Daddy, will you help me?”

  He laid his napkin on the table and stood. “Sure. I’ve taken all the abuse I can take from this woman.”

  When he stepped past her, Marty caught his arm and smiled up at him. “I love you, Ben.”

  He bent and kissed her. “I know.”

  “It’s going to take a while,” Leah warned.

  After they went inside, Marty glanced at Josiah. “Think she planned this?”

  He had zoned in on Marty Wright’s discomfort almost from the moment they greeted each other. She treated him like a polite stranger, not exhibiting the same warmth he’d witnessed when she dealt with friends. Josiah understood. He felt similar stirrings. Doubts regarding her involvement with his dad. Her ability to ever accept him in her daughter’s life. “Hard to say with Leah. You seem uncomfortable.”

  Marty paused briefly before she shrugged. “I suppose I am. Leah said you read the letter. I never planned on Joseph reading it, much less his son.”

  Josiah considered his reaction to the correspondence. “I was so shocked when it arrived on the anniversary of his death that I ripped it open and read without thinking. Then I raced over here to talk to you. I tried to get Leah to read it, too, but she refused. Said it’s against the law to read other people’s mail.”

  Marty smiled. “That’s my Leah. I will admit that knowing you’re privy to my deepest, darkest secret unnerves me. What did you take away from my letter?”

  Josiah looked Marty in the eye. “That you were very angry and my father was a player. Given my existence, I think we can agree on obviously irresponsible.”

  “He married your mother.”

  “By choice?” The words came out sounding more like a challenge than a question.

  Marty Wright shrugged. “Joe was always an enigma to me. When I tried to figure him out, he changed personalities.”

  They shared a common bond. Josiah had experienced his father’s duplicity for himself. “He played games with people’s lives.”

  Marty lifted her glass and took a long sip of the iced tea. “Maybe not. I think I assumed he committed when he really didn’t. I realized that when he didn’t return. Ben told me Joe had gotten married while they were home that summer. And that he and his wife were expecting. Once the news came out, I learned Joe had dated half the girls on campus.

  “A number of young women believed they were his one and only. He even dated one of my sorority sisters. She didn’t know about me and I certainly didn’t know about her. I couldn’t believe I’d been so blind. Each time he said he needed to study was a date with another girl.

  “But I was gullible. I can’t tell you how many times I loaned him my notes when he missed an early class because of a late night. Or helped him research something when he was overwhelmed. I trusted him and for a few months after the truth surfaced, my biggest regret was not being able to confront him. Ben kept telling me I needed to forget and forgive. That’s when I wrote the letter.”

  “You think it would have made a difference?”

  When Marty tilted her head to one side and viewed him, Josiah wondered what she was thinking. “Not for him but it would have helped me. Joe never had regrets. No matter what happened, he put it behind him and moved on.”

  Josiah nodded agreement. “He just made everyone who knew him have them.”

  Marty nodded. “I poured out my heart in those pages, writing what I believed needed to be said to Joseph. Then I stuffed the letter in an envelope and decided to move on. Ben was a good friend and after a while we started dating. Turned out he’d wanted to ask me out but I chose Joseph.”

  “Rebound?”

  She shook her head. “Never. I hate to think what I would have missed if I hadn’t gone out with Ben. We’ve had our arguments but there’s never been a moment I regretted marrying him. I kept that letter as a reminder not to hold grudges, to forgive and forget. Funny thing is I’ve pretty much forgotten what I wrote. My biggest regret is my own hypocrisy in not forgiving Joe.”

  That surprised Josiah. The vehemence in her writings struck him as the kind of thing a person would never forget. “He never mentioned my mom?”

  Marty shook her head. �
�He never spoke of any other woman. When Joseph was with someone, she was his one and only. After the truth came out, I talked with some of the others and they all agreed. We could have started a recovery group on campus alone.”

  “And you didn’t suspect?”

  “No. That’s what made it even more incomprehensible. I believed Joe to be an honest, upright young man who was going places. Then I found out he was a two-timing liar and cheat.”

  Josiah saw her struggle with the resurgence of anger the memories caused. Marty Wright regretted having known his father. “I’m sorry.”

  “You have nothing to be sorry for, Josiah. You’re not your father and I can’t blame you for his actions. I admit that what I knew about him makes me afraid for Leah.”

  Josiah felt as though the top of his head would blow off. “I have nothing but the greatest respect for your daughter. I wouldn’t lead her on. And I’m not lying to her or cheating on her. We agreed that we want to get to know each other first.”

  Marty’s gaze bored into him. “Respect?”

  “I care for Leah.”

  “Like Joseph cared for me?”

  Josiah ground his teeth. He wasn’t Joseph Byrd. He was his own man and refused to allow this woman to compare him to his father’s negative aspects. He knew what it was to love and be disrespected by the person he loved. To be dumped for someone they considered more to their liking. “As you’ve already pointed out, I am not my father.”

  “But you are his son. You’ve chosen the same college and operate the family business. Would you leave a young woman in pain because you decided you wanted someone else more?”

  “You don’t know me,” Josiah growled the words. “I would never do anything like that to the woman I loved.

  “I was invisible to my father. When he told me about the birds and bees, he said not to mess up like him and Mom. If I’d never been born, he’d have been happy. He provided financial support because my grandparents wouldn’t let him do anything less. And if my mother hadn’t loved him, I would have wished him out of my life forever.”

  Marty’s sad expression spoke to him. “I’m sorry, Josiah. That’s not what I’d want for any child. You deserve to be loved.”

  He corrected her misconception. “My mother loves me. She’s loved me enough for both parents. I suppose she took the load on her shoulders for what happened but she believed dad loved her, too. That’s why I have to protect her now.”

  “From what? Your father is dead. He can’t hurt her.”

  “He can. The truth could devastate her. She loved him without fail. How will she deal with learning what he did after all these years?”

  Marty leaned back in her chair and looked at him. “Your mom is stronger than you think. She had to be to survive her life. No mother can bear to see her child mistreated.

  “As for Joseph, I think the freedom went to his head. I know it did for me. I wasn’t wild with it but making your own decisions can be a heady experience. I had rules to live by but where I went and what I did was no one’s business but mine.”

  “You think he tomcatted around because he was free to choose?”

  Marty shifted uncomfortably. “I’m sure he cared for your mother, but absence doesn’t always make the heart grow fonder. Suddenly he had dating options and no one to tell him no.”

  “He should have known better.”

  “What were you like when you went off to college?”

  Josiah shrugged. “I went to college with my high school sweetheart. Then she dumped me to run with the popular crowd.”

  Marty grimaced. “I’m sorry, Josiah.”

  He didn’t want her feeling sorry for him. “Better before than after we were married.”

  Marty’s brows lifted toward her hairline, her eyes growing larger. “You were that serious?”

  “I probably would have married her eventually if she hadn’t shown her true colors. She made me angry and, like you, I didn’t wish her well. I started having so much fun that I nearly flunked out my first semester. Mom threatened not to pay my tuition if I didn’t buckle down.”

  “Now that sounds like a normal college kid.” She glanced toward the kitchen. “What do you think they’re doing in there?”

  He glanced over his shoulder. “Want me to go see?”

  She shook her head. “Better not ruin Leah’s surprise. So you’re ready to settle down?”

  “Yes. I’m thirty-two. Mom wants grandchildren.”

  “Did you choose Leah because you know she wants the same thing?”

  She wouldn’t give him a break. Nothing he’d said would convince her he had no intention of hurting her daughter. “I chose Leah because we have a number of things in common. I’m dating Leah because I like being with her. I wouldn’t mind if it works out for us but we aren’t rushing to the altar.”

  Marty looked suddenly apologetic. “Sorry if I came on too strong. Just promise me you’ll be honest with her. Leah deserves that much.”

  He nodded. “I am honest with her. Our initial meeting resulted from an unintentional act on her part but I know she meant no harm. I truly like Leah. She’s fun but we’ve shared some tough experiences with her helping Mom sort the house and your dog dying. I’m sorry about that.”

  Marty flashed him a sad smile. “Champ was an old dog. Still, it’s like losing a family member. We buried his ashes over there under the trees.” She indicated the area with a wave of her hand.

  “Leah told me.”

  “Thanks for being there for her when she got the news. I wish we’d been home.”

  Those were the most sincere words she’d spoken to him. Josiah thought about what he was about to say. Marty should know her daughter had doubts. “She was very emotional. Took Champ’s death personally. Said she’d let you down again.”

  Marty looked horrified. “We didn’t blame her.”

  Josiah nodded. “I think she’d been feeling a load of guilt for mailing the letter, and losing Champ on her watch pushed her over the edge.

  “There’s something else going on with her. She’s implied that she’s not happy with the direction her life is taking. She hasn’t said much. Just that the conversation was too heavy for a first date.”

  “Thanks for telling me. I’ll talk to her.”

  Josiah leaned forward. “All I ask is that you give me a chance. Please don’t think I’d ever do what my dad did to you.”

  “Can I make a suggestion?”

  Josiah eyed her curiously. He shrugged. “Sure.”

  “I know you wish I’d never written my letter but it really did help me move on. As I wrote I understood things would never have worked out for us.”

  Where was she headed with this? She had been used by his father. Josiah doubted Joseph had any intention of marrying Marty or any of the others.

  “You could write your own letter of closure to your dad. Tell him the things you’ve bottled up for years. Things you needed to tell him but didn’t. It could help release the anger and free up this emotional logjam he caused in your life.”

  “I couldn’t.”

  She reached over and gripped his hand, her voice strengthening with the encouragement. “You could. It’s not that difficult. If it takes more than a letter, keep a journal. Or talk to someone. You’re angry with him and it’s eating at your happiness like water on stone. It will break you eventually if you don’t let go. Believe me, I know.”

  Josiah frowned and she let go of her hold. “It’s only a suggestion, but it does help.”

  “You said yourself he was an enigma. How would I ever share that?”

  “You’re not sharing. Just a private communication with your dad. It’s not about what Joseph was. It’s about how he affected you with his behavior. I know he didn’t like opening up about his home experience. I got the impr
ession his parents weren’t easy people to live with.”

  “Grandma Maxine died when I was sixteen. I was twenty-four when Grandpa Jim died. Living with them helped acquaint me with their peculiarities.

  “Grandma Maxine didn’t spend a lot of time with Dad. She spent most days in her bedroom. When Grandpa couldn’t work anymore, he told Dad what to do in the business and when I went to work there Dad tried to order me around. But he had nothing to hold over my head. He couldn’t fire me. Grandpa wouldn’t have let him. And I had my own condo. I moved out of their house as soon as I possibly could.

  “I have Grandma Maxine to thank for that. When I was little, she’d have Grandpa leave all his pocket change every day. We spent hours feeding her old tin collector’s banks. They fascinated me as a kid. I still have them.

  “Instead of putting the money in over and over, she added more every day. When the banks were full, the money came out and went into an account that had been set up for me. Then when she died, she set aside another amount for me to use as a down payment on my first place.”

  “Why did you go into business with your dad?”

  That was a question Josiah had never been able to answer. With a business degree he could have done anything, but his grandfather was showing his years. When Grandpa Jim asked him to carry on his legacy, Josiah had done the course work, passed the exam and become a licensed real estate broker.

  “Because Grandpa asked me to. Turned out I was pretty good at sales.”

  “Better than your dad?”

  It shamed Josiah somewhat to admit that at times he had turned the company into an in-your-face experience for his dad. He loved to rub it in when he made deal after deal, particularly when clients preferred dealing with him over the senior Byrd.

  “Yeah. I have my mom’s personality. She can talk to anyone about anything. She took me places and introduced me to people. I’m good with names and faces, and clients loved it when this kid they’d known all his life came on the business scene. They remembered me. Still do. Anyway, when they were looking to buy real estate, they called me.”