Circle of Secrets

by Lauren Tisdale

  Saturday she spent most of the afternoon cleaning and figuring out what she was going to wear out that evening for their ladies’ night. Secretly counting down the hours until tomorrow when she would see Carlos again. She heard the horn right on time as Lyndsay blew outside her door. “I’m coming, Lyn,” she said as she scrambled, gathering her things. Thankfully she had left them all in the right places so she could just grab them and go. The movie was first, so they entered the theatre to see Heartbreakers with Sigourney Weaver and Jennifer Love Hewitt. Two of her favorite actresses. They laughed and cried, enjoying the movie. Lyndsay agreed that Bill would never go to the movies and pay to see a chick flick. If it had some action scenes, maybe. But he’d have been more content to go see Joe Dirt. Their movie tastes were not exactly on the same level, but she laughed about it, saying she was thankful that she had her girls to count on. They made their way to Outback Steakhouse for dinner and talked about the movie--what they liked and what they thought was good. She was enjoying herself, and needed this night out. They asked how she and Carlos were and whether there were any developments on that front. She smiled and told them about the “Chippendales” comment as they all laughed.

  “Talk about bad timing!” Lyndsay said as she laughed and took a sip of her water. Chantelle nodded in agreement.

  “I would have died,” Chantelle said.

  “I felt like it, trust me,” Marissa added.

  Luckily the restaurant was naturally loud because that caught them both off guard. Once she continued the story and told them her plan to talk to him about where they stood in their relationship Lyndsay clapped and said it was about time. Then Marissa told her friends that if she learned it was serious she’d switch doctors before making anything official.

  “That’s a good idea. It’s not illegal, but it is unethical. There is a possibility he could lose his license.” Chantelle added and Marissa nodded in agreement.

  “Yeah, and I’d hate to see something happen and him get into any kind of trouble because of me.”

  “Well, it seems you’ve thought it all out, I really do hope he feels the same way. I think he does, though. You can tell!” Lyndsay said excitedly. They continued to talk about work, babies, husbands and marriage while they ate.

  “Sophia has gone to stay with my parents for two weeks, along with Samantha,” Marissa said as Lyndsay nodded and chewed her food.

  After swallowing she added, “Yeah, one down, two to go. Wonder if anyone would take Bill for the summer?”

  All three women shared another laugh. Chantelle told them about the new man in her life. Not exactly new, but current. She was still seeing the guy she worked with and he’d transferred to another department so that they wouldn’t be breaking any rules about dating co-workers. Marissa felt like she was almost in the same predicament. Chantelle looked so much happier and seemed like she needed this night out just like the rest of them.

  “I had this case last week, it was so horrible. I never knew being a social worker, you’d get so attached, but I do. To see these kids who are just getting neglected by their own parents sickens me.”

  “I couldn’t imagine doing what you do, Chantelle. It must be hard to see that. How do you not get emotionally attached?”

  “You’re not supposed to, but it’s very easy to get attached when you’re the only person who can help that child. They rely on you to help them.”

  Their conversation changed to Marissa going back to teaching in the fall. She had already begun her lesson plans and was counting down until the summer was over so she could get her life back to a somewhat normal stance. August was just around the corner, in a few weeks, and if she felt good now, she knew she’d feel just as good then. Their girls’ night went off without a hitch as they laughed, cried and talked the night away. Before they knew it, it was almost midnight and they began to give their goodbyes. Both of her friends wished her luck on her date Sunday with Carlos and were certain it would go well. Chantelle swore there would be wedding bells in her future as Marissa smiled and blushed.

  “Let’s not count our chickens just yet, Chantelle,” she said as she hugged her goodnight. “Be safe, call me later.” After a round of goodbye hugs they went to their vehicles and dispersed into the night. Marissa headed home and smiled as she thought about their upcoming date. Looking at the clock on her radio, she realized it was a few minutes after midnight, making it officially Sunday. In a few hours she’d be on the beach for a picnic date with Carlos. It had been a little over a month and a half since they’d started spending time together. She just hoped the talk went well.

  She crawled into bed, deciding on a morning shower instead, feeling beat. She awoke to the sounds of a crow outside her window as she peered with one eye open and groaned. A crow? Odd for sure. It was perched on the power line outside her window until it squawked and flew away.

  “Thanks for the wakeup call!” She groaned as she crawled from bed and slowly made her way to the shower. As the hot water hit her body, she let out a sigh of relief. It began to wake her up and she smiled as she would be seeing Carlos today. After her shower, she wrapped her hair in a towel and threw on some shorts and a tank top as she headed for coffee. She nibbled on a piece of toast while she waited for her coffee to finish brewing. She made sure she took her medication and then poured herself a steamy cup of joe. The steam flickered in a dance from the hot liquid in her red coffee mug as she mixed in sugar and cream, stirring it and placing the spoon aside.

  She slowly made her way to the large white sofa and set the mug down before placing her feet and legs under her to watch television. Sunday morning television was always very dull and bland. Thankful she had a DVR, she searched her shows to see what would pass the time until she needed to get ready. Settling on a movie she’d recorded from Encore, she sipped her coffee and relaxed.

  Before she knew it, it was already lunchtime. She heated up some of her leftovers from Olive Garden and danced around the kitchen to the music on the Bose stereo system she had installed last Christmas as a gift from her parents. She loved it, it always got turned on when she was cleaning or doing yoga or exercise. For so long, all of her favorite things had been touch and go due to her feeling so sick. A sharp pain made her stop dancing as she held her lower back and took a deep breath. Don’t overdo it Marissa, she told herself as she took the plate from the microwave and moved to the table. The telephone rang just as she sat down and she stood to answer it.

  “Hello?”

  “Marissa, it’s Carlos. Just calling to make sure we are still on for today?”

  “Oh, hey, Carlos. Yes, of course. Three, right?”

  “Yes, three. Unless you’d like to get here earlier, which would be fine.”

  She smiled. “Oh okay, I just sat down for some lunch, after that I can head over.”

  “That sounds great. I’ll see you soon then, enjoy your lunch.”

  “Thanks, see you then.” After they hung up she smiled and shook her head as she began to eat and play a game on her cell phone. She started to wonder what she’d wear. After taking a few bites, her curiosity got the better of her so she headed for her closet to pick something out. Twenty minutes passed before she finally settled on a summer dress she had. It was white, with small flower designs around the side and bottom hem. Slightly past her knee, with a halter style top. Perfect for a beach date. And she had the perfect pair of flat sandals she could pair with the dress.

  She decided to get ready right then and there, her hair had long since dried and she sprayed it with some relaxer so she didn’t look like a poodle. Her long brown waves cascaded down her shoulders as she pinned the side up with a white clip that matched the color of her dress. After applying light makeup she was ready to go. While passing the kitchen, she took another bite of her lunch before throwing out the little bit she had left. She didn’t want to eat too much since he was being considerate and cooking a meal for later. Here goes nothing, she thought to herself.

  Marissa had never been to
Carlos’ house. His directions were easy to follow and it was only fifteen minutes from her place, give or take a few, depending on traffic. Carlos didn’t have a huge expensive bachelor pad like she’d imagined in her head when she began to wonder what it looked like, but one that was simple. It was him. The glass windows that surrounded the house made her wonder if that was bad for privacy. The driveway wasn’t a mile long, but it was far from the road so maybe not. There were other condos along the beach, each widely separated. His place was nice, simple and modern. Not fancy as if he just threw around his money. She liked it. Casual and relaxed, just as she was. Turning the engine off, she saw him emerge from the house wearing a white polo golf shirt and white slacks. A vision in white that was for sure. He opened her door for her as she grabbed her things from the passenger side.

  “Hey, glad you found it okay.”

  “Your directions were great.”

  He kissed her cheek and offered to take her bag, which she allowed. He took one of her hands in his and grabbed the bag with his free hand as he led her down the path to the front door. Being a gentleman, he opened the door and stepped aside for her to enter, then followed. Setting her bag on a hook by the door, he closed it behind him.

  “Welcome to my home,” he said as he threw both arms outward to show the place off. “Nothing fancy, just me.”

  She nodded and looked around. There was a small fireplace in the corner of the room with pictures on the mantel. They appeared to be pictures of family. A large picture of a sailboat on sunset waters hung on the far wall. Hazelnut colored furniture that included a chair with a foot rest and a sofa, was scattered about and he had a small area rug underneath the coffee table in the center of the room. It appeared to be a one-story condo.

  He took her hand and asked if she’d like a tour.

  “Sure.”

  He smiled as he turned her around, facing the opposite end of the room. A bar stood there with barstools. She could see a kitchen beyond the bar. Not huge, but not small. Perfect for just him. Leading her down the hallway on the left, he showed her the bathroom, office and at the last room on the right he pointed to the closed door.

  “Master bedroom. It’s only a one-bedroom but has two bathrooms. I like that, no one has to use my bathroom. I guess it’s from being a doctor,” he said as they both laughed and turned back toward the kitchen. The smells wafted through the air into her nose even though she was only an hour and a half early.

  “Did you start cooking already?”

  “Yes, I sure did. You like Spanish food, I hope?”

  She smiled. “Love it.”

  “I come from a Puerto Rican heritage if that’s not already obvious. My parents were from Puerto Rico. I was born here, but of course I know the language and cooking style. Which are the best parts.”

  “Oh really? Say something in Spanish for me?” she asked with a grin as he tilted his head in thought, smiling.

  “Te ves tan hermosa hoy,” he said with an accent that made her want to melt right there.

  “So what’s that mean?” she asked after she giggled.

  “You look so beautiful today.” His pearl white teeth showed as he smiled widely.

  “Aw, thank you. You look great, too.” A slight pink blush tinted her cheeks as she cleared her throat.

  “So you’re going to teach me to cook, yes?” she asked as he nodded and ushered her into the kitchen. He opened a small pot and steam rose from it. Inhaling deeply she let her breath out slowly. “Mmm, that smells amazing, what is that?”

  He grinned as he began to stir before answering, “Steamed Vegetables with a light sauce that’s a family secret.”

  The rest of the time he spent explaining how to make certain dishes, but others he claimed were family secrets. They laughed as they cooked together. Sipping a glass of water, she listened attentively as he told her about the dishes his mother had made when he was younger and his run-in with a jalapeño he mistook for a different vegetable. After they laughed a bit more at his story, he turned to her and became serious.

  “So, while this is finishing up, how about a walk on the beach? But it must be done barefoot, it’s the only way.”

  “I’d love to and I agree. Growing up on the beach was amazing. I miss it.” He took her hand as they headed for the sliding glass door that led to the tan sandy beach. The waves rolled upon the shore and pulled back; the sounds of the waves was like peaceful serenity to her ears. Her smile never left her mouth as his hand held hers, their fingers intertwining. They walked in unison, barefoot along the sand, where the waves would softly brush their legs and the bottoms of their feet. She laughed and let out a squeal as water splashed up her leg, clutching her dress in her hand as it got wet. He towered over her in height at something like six feet one inch compared to her five feet five inches stature. He chuckled and moved with her as she tried to avoid the water. As they continued on in silence, she decided it was the best time to talk to him.

  “Carlos, remember that talk I wanted to have?”

  He nodded and became serious as he listened to her. “Yes. I do. Now I’m worried.”

  “Don’t be. But I do need to talk to you about something.”

  “I’m all ears.”

  “Well, before I start, let me just say you don’t need to feel obligated to answer in any specific way, but…I need to know what level we’re on. I mean, friends, more than friends? Or even what we’re planning?”

  He looked down as they continued to walk while she watched his facial reactions. He began to smile as he looked up and stared straight ahead while squinting his eyes because of the sun.

  “Well, honestly. I’m not sure. I mean, I wasn’t sure what you wanted, and I didn’t want to push you at all. But I do really, really like you and I think we’re great together. But I don’t want you feeling obligated to feel the same way.”

  “That’s not it at all. I feel the same, I like you, too. And I love when we’re together. But if we’re gonna do this…you and I…together, like be together. I have…I have to stop seeing you as my doctor.” She stopped and he followed suit as they stood facing one another. She held both of his hands in hers. “But I want you to know it’s not because of you, you’re the best doctor I’ve had, but to be together in a relationship—I can’t risk you losing your license because of unethical behavior.” She thought he was following what she was saying because he nodded. Cupping her cheek with his hand he smiled, looking into her brown eyes.

  “So this is what’s been bothering you?” She nodded. “I see. Well I have to say you are right on target. I respect you for thinking of my career, and I have no issue if you must change doctors. Are you staying with the office or going to have to see someone else in another town? Do you need help with any of that?”

  She shook her head and smiled, relieved at his reaction. “No, actually I have an appointment with Dr. McKeon this Tuesday. As long as it’s okay to date a doctor your new doctor works with,” she said playfully as he chuckled.

  “I do think that is okay. I’ll make sure we get your files transferred over, and Dr. McKeon has helped me numerous times with your case so she’s familiar with it. You’ll be in good hands.”

  “I already am,” she said as she grinned, nodding at their hand-holding as he shook his head.

  “So does this mean I have to wait until I am officially not your doctor to kiss you or call you my girlfriend?” he asked with his brow cocked.

  She chuckled and shook her head. “Well, maybe the girlfriend part.”

  Grinning, he nodded. “I can live with that,” he said before inching closer to her. His lips met hers and sent a spark through her body.

  Such a cliché to think that sparks were flying, yadda yadda. But wow, was it true. His hands reached up to cup each side of her face as her hands gripped his arms, holding onto him so she wouldn’t fall. The water from the waves splashing and breaking against their legs, everything else in the world, was ignored as he kissed her with such love and passion, it made
her heart stop. Her breath caught in her throat as their lips moved in unison. His tongue outlined her bottom lip, coaxing for entrance as the kiss deepened. For a moment she lost herself and could think of nothing but this moment, his lips on hers. He slowly pulled back and looked down into her eyes as she looked up into his with a smile before whispering, “Wow.”

  He chuckled and nodded in agreement. The sun was slowly making its descent in the sky, painting a lovely picture of oranges and blues and black. It was God’s canvas, such an admirable and breathtaking sight to see. Once the sun reached the horizon, clouds were transformed into a deep burnt orange color as the last few rays said their good-bye to the daylight hours. The waters turned from blue to an almost black color as the light began to disappear. They watched the sun set together, his arm around her as hers were wrapped around his chest. Her head lay gently on his torso as they stood in awe at the marvelous sight before them. She could hear his heart beating, the feel of his kiss still lingering on her lips as she closed her eyes and took in the moment. Down into her soul she felt so amazing with him, so confident. New feelings were evolving in her for him and she wasn’t scared of them anymore.

  He broke the silence when he suggested they go get dinner and she nodded in agreement. They made their way back to his condo walking along the warm sand, and as they came closer she noticed a small pile of wood on the sand, with a large blanket spread out next to it.

  “What’s that?”

  “Oh, that’s where we will be having dinner. On the beach. If you want to, that is.”

  “It’s perfect, I’d love to.”

  He smiled and pulled her closer to him as they walked down the beach. It was perfect actually, the small picnic setting. Seeing the sun setting over the horizon as the flames of the fire gave off heat and light while they ate. Summer nights in North Carolina were not extremely hot, and there would be a small chill in the air once the sun had gone away for the day. She helped him bring out the small dishes of food and put them on the blanket as he grabbed the bottle of wine and two glasses. She had just taken a seat on the blanket when he came from the house through the glass sliding doors. He set the wine and glasses down, turned to the wood and proceeded to ignite a fire. His whole disposition in a private setting was so much more relaxed then his professional demeanor. It was nice to see him let loose and to get to know the man behind the medical degree. The fire caught and the flames danced, smoke rising into the dusk air. He smiled at her and took a seat next to her. Reaching for the wine and glasses, he gave her a glass and opened the bottle, pouring the wine into each glass. He set it aside and turned back to her.