Circle of Secrets

by Lauren Tisdale

  The next morning she sat at the small kitchen table reading the newspaper and drinking her coffee. She’d told the nurse to call her when the results were in and she’d bring her dad in to speak to the doctor. Lunchtime had come around and she had heard no word so she began to get anxious. Shouldn’t they know something by now? Tyson came home for lunch and she voiced her concerns.

  “Shouldn’t they have gotten the results in by now?” she asked him as they sat across from one another.

  He tilted his head to the side as he chewed, swallowed and answered her. “Not necessarily, love. He may be evaluating all the tests to piece together a proper diagnosis. There may even be more testing if he is still uncertain. Patience, love.”

  “You and I both know I have none, Tyson.”

  He smiled and nodded as she shook her head. The phone rang and she jumped up to answer it, his gaze following her movements.

  “Yes, this is Helen Morrison. Yes, I am his daughter…okay, what time? Today you mean? Yes, okay, I understand. Thank you, yes that is fine.” She hung the phone up as he looked at her waiting for the news. “He wants to speak with Dad and me today at three. Is this bad or normal? Do they do that?”

  “Well, if he’s narrowed it down, he could be requesting a consultation with you to tell you the diagnosis and treatment options. Would you like me to go with you? I can take the rest of the day off if you need me.”

  Leaning against the counter, she positioned one arm across her chest and rested the other on top of it as she slid her hand under her chin in thought. It would be great to have him there for support but she just couldn’t make him ignore his afternoon patients.

  “You have appointments, I’m sure. I couldn’t ask you to do that.”

  “I can reschedule those, as far as I know it’s only two. You say the word and I’ll be there.”

  “Tyson, are you positive it won’t be an issue? I’d love for you to be there but you don’t need upset patients.”

  “The afternoon appointments are always just checkups. I’ll call Mary and tell her to call and reschedule them. Family emergencies always come first.”

  She smiled and walked over to him, giving him a hug and kissing his cheek. “Thank you so much.”

  After Tyson called Mary on his cell, Helen picked up the phone in the kitchen and called her father again. She’d spoken to him that morning and he was fine and had even made his own breakfast. After the fourth ring she started to worry, and when he finally answered she exhaled in relief.

  “Dad, its Helen. Are you okay?”

  “I was sleeping, are you going to call and check on me every couple of hours?” he asked with a sleepy chuckle. She smiled and shook her head before answering.

  “No, Dad. I was calling to tell you the doctor wants to speak with you today at three. Can you be ready at two? I’ll come pick you up.”

  “Yeah I can. Call and make sure I’m awake. This old man may fall asleep again.” Overall he sounded well. Sleepy, but well.

  “Okay, Dad. Get some rest, I’ll see you this afternoon.” They hung up the phone and Helen turned back to Tyson and smiled. “He sounded good today. Sleepy but good. He said he’s been having trouble sleeping lately and I don’t know why.”

  “Hopefully we’ll find out why today. I’m confident in Doctor Grayson. He’s one heck of a specialist. If there’s anything, he’ll catch it.”

  “I trust you, and if he’s as good as you say then I trust him, too.”

  The day wore on as she tried to get some housework done to alleviate some of the stress she was feeling waiting for the time to pass to get answers for her father. She managed to work a bit in her flower garden as she had neglected it for a few weeks. The flowers were thankful for the water and looked livelier once she groomed and weeded out the area. It helped to pass the time, doing her gardening, and it always relaxed her and gave her a sense of enjoyment. Before she knew it, the time had passed quickly. She called her father who answered and sounded as normal as can be. She told him she’d be on her way to get him soon and he said he’d be waiting for her.

  The trip back to the doctor’s office was quiet as she sat in the backseat, allowing her father the front seat for his leg room. Tyson had agreed to drive in order to take her mind off one thing. She didn’t know what she’d hear and she was uncertain whether it would be good news or not. But whichever it was, she knew she’d be there for her dad any way she could.

  Waiting for the doctor to enter the room was the worst part. Her fear surfacing, she noticed her father wringing his hands as they waited in silence. When the door opened all three of their heads turned to watch Dr. Grayson enter. He nodded and gave them all a small smile.

  “Thank you for coming in this afternoon. How are you Mr. Burrows? Feeling any better?”

  “Oh, about the same. So, have you found out anything?” her father asked.

  “After reviewing the scans of your brain we did yesterday, along with the blood work and consultation I think it’s safe to say I may know what is happening, and I’m almost certain that there is some sort of treatment. With further testing to actually pinpoint how severe it is, we can treat it.”

  “Treat what?” Helen asked as her voice broke slightly. Tyson gripped her hand and her other hand held her father’s knee.

  “From what I gather it appears there was a brain injury in the accident. It was very small but triggered something that he may have had in a minor sense. I am uncertain whether it’s permanent or due to the head injury, but I do believe you are suffering from dementia, Mr. Burrows.”

  The room seemed to be closing in as he revealed her worst fear, the one thing she’d told herself it couldn’t be. Over her many years as a nurse she’d seen elderly patients who had dementia and it broke her heart completely to see them with such pain in their eyes knowing they were not the same and the confusion that followed. In extreme cases it led to death, but the worst part was forgetting who you were and who your family is. She looked down as she tried not to sob, her eyes forming tears as she tried to fight them back.

  Tyson sighed and Joseph sat still as he looked at the doctor.

  “Dementia? Like the senile forgetful disease?” He thought for a moment before continuing before the doctor could answer, “And you don’t know if it’s permanent?”

  Helen looked up with tears streaking her face as Tyson put an arm around her back, waiting for an answer.

  “With further testing we can tell if it’s permanent or if it can improve over time. There are medications and therapy that can be done to help slow it down or improve it. And yes, that is pretty much what dementia is. Now I can give you more information about this so you and your family can decide the best route for you to take.”

  “Best route?” Helen asked, a bit confused.

  The doctor leaned back in his chair behind his desk, across from them all. “Yes, if your father wants to undergo treatment, there are places that deal with specific diseases like this where they do daily mental treatments to help improve the symptoms. Untreated, his condition could progressively get worse and ultimately become unmanageable.”

  She didn’t know what to say or do at the news, she wanted to care for him but didn’t know how. There were nurses who specialized in this and she knew it would be better for him but really it was his decision.

  “What are the chances it’s temporary?” she asked as she wiped a tear away before her father saw it. The lump in her throat was growing.

  “It’s hard to say. The symptoms you’ve described sound like a more advanced stage of dementia. I will be here every step of the way to ensure he gets the proper care and treatment, Mrs. Morrison. I can assure you that.”

  She nodded and looked over at her father who was silent. “Dad. What are you thinking?”

  He seemed to be interrupted from being in deep thought as he looked up and over at Helen with a small smile. “Well I’m not sure what to think. I don’t want to leave my home and I don’t want to be in an old folks’ home. If
I’m gonna die, I wanna do it in my own bed, in my own house.”

  “Daddy, no one said anything about you dying. Dr. Grayson will help get you treatment to get better. Don’t you want that?”

  “Suppose that doesn’t help, Helen? Suppose it’s too far gone to even help?”

  She looked at the doctor for help to reassure Joseph but he regrettably looked down, affirming that fear of the worst. Her father was right and the doctor confirmed it. She felt herself getting angry. “So you’re just going to give up? Mom had breast cancer and she fought the whole entire time. Why can’t you try?”

  He turned his body in his seat to face her as he took both her hands in his old frail ones. An aging old man with loose, wrinkled hands. Veins that were like a map of the long life he’d lived. Old and tired but so soft to the touch as his crinkled palms touched hers. She squeezed his hands as she looked down letting a few tears fall from her eyes.

  “Cupcake, I’m not giving up. But if I do any treatment I want it done at my house. I want to be comfortable, in familiar surroundings. Please at least give me that. I’ll do whatever you wish me to, but give your old man the satisfaction of being at home.”

  She looked up at the doctor begging with her eyes for him to say it was possible. He gave a small nod and answered her unspoken question.

  “There are possibly ways we can get a home health agency to care for him at home. I can look into that for you both if you wish?”

  She nodded and looked back at her father. “We’ll get through this together, okay? I’m always going to be here and I’ll do anything I can for you. You know that.”

  He touched her cheek and smiled. “I know, cupcake.” Leaning over to her he kissed her forehead as he held her cheek, while her hand reached up to lay on top of his hand as she sobbed lightly.

  She had lost her mother, now she feared she may not have much time with her father if he was showing signs of a progressed condition. Tyson kept his hand on her shoulder to give her some sort of comfort in the hushed room.

  Dr. Grayson finally broke the silence. “I will get in contact with the proper healthcare systems to see about home therapy for you Mr. Burrows. Would that be better for you?”

  Joseph nodded in response as he looked up and back to the doctor. “Exactly what kind of therapy will help this?”

  “Well, there is medication, constant check-ups and of course mental therapy such as doing memory tests and things of that sort each day. Once it progresses to severe there won’t be much you can do except take each change as it comes.”

  “Change? You mean forgetting. Forgetting everything?” Dr. Grayson nodded.

  Joseph appeared to be accepting his diagnosis better than Helen was. Perhaps, something inside of him knew something was wrong. She hoped he would tell her what it was before he forgot it had even happened.

  Chapter Ten

  Marissa smiled as she woke Tuesday morning, lying in bed and listening to her radio alarm go off. It was playing a good song. Her date on Sunday with Carlos ran through her mind as she thought of their talk…dinner…the way he’d kissed her. Oh wow, could he kiss. It had gotten so heated so fast until she broke away from him and he blushed. Their attraction to one another was strong and she didn’t know where they were headed but she felt as if it was in a great direction.

  Today was her appointment with Dr. McKeon. She was nervous about questions of why she had switched but figured it was no one’s business. She and Carlos were no longer in a patient/doctor relationship so why should it matter? It was her life, her personal life, and that did not interfere with her medical treatment.

  She rose from the bed feeling giddy about seeing him today. They had been spending lots of time together and since Sophia was at her grandparents it gave Marissa more alone time with him. Her parents had invited her to dinner this Friday night and she thought about taking him with her to meet them. They had only been seeing one another for about two months now but weren’t officially dating yet.

  Grabbing her clothes and setting them out, she headed for a morning shower. The house was so quiet without Sophia running around. She missed her so much even though they spoke every night before bed. Her mom had said the girls were having a blast and were even learning to surf from a local surfing instructor giving free summer lessons. It was good for them both but she missed having her daughter home. Her mother reassured her many times that they were fine.

  She was dressed and ready for her appointment as she grabbed her purse and had to clutch the counter for balance. A sharp pain in her side caught her attention as she tried to breathe through the pain. Slowly and carefully she made her way to the cabinet where she kept her medication and took it. Holding her side and squinting her eyes, she prayed that it was just one of those pains that came and went and not something worse. As quickly as the pain came, it went. She fixed her shirt to make sure it wasn’t rumpled before grabbing her keys and slowly walking towards the door. She thanked God for letting the pain pass fast.

  It felt somewhat odd sitting in the waiting room and waiting to see a different doctor. She was always so used to seeing the same people each time. Now there was a new receptionist, new nurses, and a new doctor. Although they all practiced in the same building, it was a different room altogether. She had to fill out a few forms and return them. Instead of waiting a few minutes for her turn to see the doctor it had been almost forty-five minutes before her name was called. Taking her purse and standing, she made her way to the back. Following a nurse who was old enough to be her mother to a room in the back, she returned the smile the older woman gave her. She took her normal seat on the exam table and waited to be seen. A smile came to her lips as she wished she was seeing Carlos, but she’d rather be able to see him as just another woman than as his patient. It couldn’t be both, it had to be one or the other.

  “Miss Hayes?”

  “Yes,” she answered as she looked up to see Dr. McKeon entering, carrying her chart. “That’s me.”

  “How are we doing today? I’m Dr. Danielle McKeon, I see here you were once Dr. Martinez’s patient. What was the reason for your switch, if you don’t mind me asking?” the doctor asked casually as she put the folder down and leaned against the counter. Marissa could feel her cheeks reddening.

  “Well, it’s kind of personal. I hope you can understand.”

  Dr. McKeon smiled and nodded, seeming to read between the lines. “I see. Well I’m glad you called, I’ve known Dr. Martinez for a while and have helped on your case a few times so I’m somewhat familiar with it. Since your last visit have any more issues occurred? Is the medication helping?” she asked as Marissa listened before answering.

  “Not really any changes. I’m still feeling…good. I have occasional spasms of pain but they don’t last long.”

  “Pain where?” Marissa pointed to her lower abdomen on the side as the doctor felt around the area, following up on her complaints.

  “Okay, if that pain persists you need to see me again. It could be nothing, but it could be something just the same. Are all your medications and information still the same?” Marissa nodded. “Okay then, I’m going to have them weigh you and take your blood pressure. Is there anything else you needed to talk about today?”

  “Thank you. Um, I don’t think so. When would you like me to see you again?” Dr. McKeon looked at Marissa’s chart and answered, “We can continue every other Tuesday, unless there is a problem in between and then I’ll need to see you as soon as possible. Okay?”

  Marissa nodded and smiled, “Thank you, yes that’s great. I guess I’ll see you in two weeks?”

  Dr. McKeon nodded and smiled, “Sure will. Take care, Miss Hayes. It’s good to see you looking so well.”

  “Oh thank you, Dr. McKeon. It feels great, too. Thank you for seeing me today.” She shook her new doctor’s hand and watched her walk out the door, waiting for the nurse to come in and take her vitals. Once that was done and she was weighed she grabbed her purse and went to the reception desk for her
next appointment card.

  “Thank you Miss Hayes. Have a great day,” the receptionist said as Marissa took the card and returned the smile.

  On the ride home, she felt relieved that she had a new doctor and no longer had to worry about what might happen if she was to start seeing Carlos intimately, if it came to that. She’d hate to see him lose his license and reputation, all for her. The thought of him made her giddy again. Remembering she had to call him about dinner with her parents, she tried to remind herself over and over so she wouldn’t forget as she always did. In such a good mood, she sang along with the radio on the way home, having not a care in the world and feeling great.

  Kicking her shoes off, she lay on the couch with her phone in her hand. Calling her mother first, she waited for her to pick up which she did after the second ring.

  “Mom? It’s me. I was calling to let you know everything went great today, my new doctor is really sweet. I like her.”

  “Oh, honey, that’s great. Still feeling okay? Any changes?”

  “No, feeling great, Mom.”

  “So I take it your talk with Dr. Martinez went well?”

  Marissa smiled and nodded before answering. “Yes, it went very well actually. He’s so great mom! Really. It was so romantic on the beach with him. I haven’t felt this happy in so long. I really…really like him.” Her cheeks were beginning to hurt as she talked about him and couldn’t stop smiling. He made her so happy, being with him made her feel something she’d never really felt before.

  “I am so happy for you, sweetheart. Both of us are. Your dad and I were just talking about you and this doctor. Why don’t you bring him for dinner Friday? Unless you think it’s too soon?”